You Found Me
by songsofthestars
Summary: Scarr fic! When Schuyler's attempt to push Starr away does more harm than good, the two decide what they have is worth fighting for and start a secret relationship, finding happiness with each other even as others try to tear them apart.
1. Chapter 1

So, this is an idea that hit me from a combination of me wondering about what kind of situation could make Schuyler have a change of heart about pushing Starr away, and thinking about Cole's semi violent freak-outs on 3-2-09 and after the dance. Now, for the record, I would like to stress now that even if it might seem that way at a point or two during the fic, I have no intentions of making Cole a villain or anything, because while I'm not exactly a fan of his, I do think that'd be a disservice to the character. He's just a really messed up kid who's often high, which is not the best combination, suffice to say. I intend to take him down a path I'd like to see him go down on the show, though, so I promise I won't make him all one dimensional or anything!

Oh, some pre-info for this fic: Schuyler got his job back after a strict warning never to be alone with Starr again. Cole isn't in jail or rehab after the accident; the sentence he got at the hearing was that he had to go to rehab meetings weekly and do the pee testing, but he's an outpatient, he doesn't have to stay at a center. And Schuyler has already pushed Starr away at the beginning of the fic, the details of what he did exactly are mentioned throughout.

As far as the timeline goes, I had to mess with it a bit to fit my purposes, so here's a quick summary: Sometime after the night we saw Stacy agree to pretend to still be Schuyler's girlfriend on the show, Starr shows up at his place, and that's when the pushing her away incident happens. A week, maybe a little more, passes, and that's when the court scene with Cole and Starr and the custody trial happens- that was two days ago in the fic. Oh, and one more change; the Australian donor isn't pregnant, she came through as a match for Shane. You'll see why. Okay, finally, on with the fic!

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

As his students began to file into his classroom, Schuyler anxiously drummed his fingers on the table, eagerly waiting for a glimpse at the girl who was constantly haunting his thoughts. It was sad, he knew it, but ever since he'd made the decision to push her away, that was all he had to look forward to- glimpses.

He wished he could say that he didn't regret what he'd done, but ever since that day she'd found out Stacy was living with him and Schuyler had let her believe she was his girlfriend, ever since that day when he had told her nothing would ever happen between them and that they'd only turned to each other out of desperation (all while selfishly hoping she would see the truth about how he felt in his eyes), ever since that day he'd insisted that Cole was who she really wanted, Schuyler was definitely living with regret.

Starr was a pure, innocent young girl who was one of his _students._ The last thing she needed in her life was somebody with as much baggage as him, someone who would only taint her goodness, someone that would make life so much more difficult for her; when Cole got clean, she'd be so much better off with him. But, therein lied the problem; Schuyler couldn't just forget her, let her go- in fact, if he was being completely honest, the thought of Cole touching her, _kissing_ her, made him want to break things, made him feel the return of that swelling frustration that had a way of boiling over into anger, that he'd tried so hard to put behind him when he'd gotten past his own addiction. Maybe it made sense that it had returned, though; it seemed Starr was his _new_ addiction. He couldn't stop constantly thinking about her, remembering that all too brief kiss, desperately wishing it could happen again despite knowing every logical reason why it couldn't; his defenses felt like they were being eroded bit by bit, and he was certain that if they ever kissed again, he wouldn't be able to let her go this time.

Starr was the only person who had ever truly understood him, that he'd felt connected to; after a lifetime of feeling like he was just drifting along aimlessly, Starr made him feel grounded, like he belonged somewhere…with _somebody_. He tried to tell himself he shouldn't feel that way, remind himself of her age, but it couldn't erase the very real, very solid things he felt for her. The distance had not decreased his want for her, just the opposite, and the pain of knowing he would never feel her lips on his again, never get to be with her, the only girl he had ever felt this way about, just got worse everytime they acted like strangers in this class.

Suddenly, Schuyler straightened up as he heard what he'd been waiting for; Langston's bright, perky voice, that always announced her and Starr's entrance before you could see them. The duo walked through the door a moment later, and Schuyler instantly drank in the sight of the girl that always made his heart pound when she appeared. Her head was down, her hair falling down around her like a curtain, hiding her face, but Schuyler could instantly tell something was wrong. It was not just her posture that alerted him, he could just somehow…_feel_ that something was off- it was because of that connection between them, it had to be; sometimes he felt like he knew her better than he knew himself, and he was certain there was nothing she could hide from him.

Starr took her seat and glanced up at the board, but quickly averted her eyes when she saw him, her shoulders going tense; Schuyler felt a sharp pain. He was a selfish bastard for feeling this way when this was exactly what he'd _wanted_ to happen, but Schuyler couldn't control how much he missed the days when she would smile when she saw him instead of react like it hurt.

He hated this distance between them so much, even if it was the right thing to do for her, and hell, for him too if he wanted to keep his job. But he hated knowing something was wrong with this person he cared more about than anyone in the world yet having no idea _what_; he knew Starr had been incredibly hurt when he'd coldly put on an act and told her she was nothing but another student to him, and she'd taken those words to heart- after their kiss, she had been forbidden from helping him with his master's assignment anymore, so this was the only place he saw her, and she never said a word to him anymore.

It killed him more than he could ever admit. He had just gotten so used to always knowing what was going on with her; he'd become the person Starr went to with all of her problems, and despite knowing that it was wrong, that he should direct her to someone else, and that he, a guy who inevitably destroyed every good thing in his life was the last person someone should come to for help fixing things, he'd loved being that for her. Now that he'd made sure he was _nothing_ to her, now that he didn't know a thing, he couldn't keep himself from constantly worrying about her. Had she turned to anybody else, or was she just bottling everything up now?

"Okay, fun announcement, everybody," Schuyler announced with a smile once all his students were seated and silent. "I graded your papers last night!" There was a loud chorus of groans, and he chuckled. "What, that's not fun for you too? Sorry, my mistake."

He rose to his feet, grabbing the stack of papers on his desk to hand them out. As he walked to the first row of seats, Starr finally looked up from her desk, brushing her hair back behind her ears, and Schuyler suddenly froze in his place, his stomach twisting as his heart froze; with her hair out of the way, he could now clearly see the large, painful looking bruise along the side of her face.

Realizing he was just standing there, staring at the very student he'd been strictly warned about having contact with, Schuyler swallowed roughly, handing out the papers to the appropriate students even as his head pounded wildly with panic; Starr was _hurt_ and he didn't know what had happened or if she was okay, and he had to somehow act like this didn't affect him, a feat that seemed completely impossible with the overwhelming worry he was experiencing right now.

He reached her row after what felt like an eternity and took a deep breath, desperately trying to seem casual as he spoke.

"Are you alright, Miss. Manning?" he asked calmly as he passed her paper over, speaking the same way as when he asked the rest of the students how their weekends had been. He _hated_ talking to _her_ like that, especially about this.

"I'm fine," she replied stiffly in a manner that instantly left him positive she wasn't. Her eyes remained planted on her shoes, and Schuyler desperately wished she would look at him. Already, he missed something as small as being able to look into her eyes; he was not going to survive this year.

Schuyler quickly finished his task and returned to his desk to begin the class, violently fighting with himself for control. This had to be hell, he was sure of it; seeing this girl that he lov…_cared_ about, bruised, hurt, right in front of his eyes and not only not knowing what had happened but being unable to show his concern or worry had to be hell.

Schuyler proceeded to give what he was sure had to have been his most dull, flat lesson ever, barely able to tear his eyes off of Starr the entire time. Starr was the first person Schuyler had met in a long time that completely shared his love of science, and she was usually eager and attentive in his class, hanging off his every word and the first to raise her hand to answer or ask questions, but today, she remained silent and slouched over, appearing utterly blank for the rest of the period as she just stared at her desk, and Schuyler's anxiety grew worse with each passing second; she didn't seem upset, she seemed _broken_, and despite his vow to do the right thing and stay away, Schuyler felt the pressing need to first fix her, then break whoever had broken _her_ in the first place.

After an agonizing hour passed, the bell finally rang and Schuyler emitted a near silent breath of relief, quickly telling the students their homework assignment and sending them on their way.

"Miss Manning, could you remain behind for a moment?" he called with a false calmness as she started to leave. "I need to ask you a few questions about your paper."

Starr looked momentarily confused, likely wondering what he could need to ask about a paper he'd given an A, but took her seat. Langston and Markko glanced at her, and she nodded to tell them to go ahead without her.

Schuyler stood as his students filed out of the room, hovering by the doorway for a moment, and as soon as they were all gone, he quickly glanced into the hall and shut the door, all thoughts about how he was supposed to avoid being seen doing exactly this flying from his mind. Starr glanced at him with a frown as Schuyler quickly walked back to her, swinging his leg over the chair in front of her desk, sitting so he was facing her.

"Starr, what happened?" he asked immediately, a sense of urgency to his tone. She stared at him for a moment, unmoving, a look of utter disbelief in her eyes, then suddenly scowled.

"I thought this was about my paper."

"Your paper was great, best in the class, what else is new? What happened to _you_?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," she snapped, closing her book with a loud slam, grabbing her backpack to gather her things. Schuyler slowly blinked, momentarily surprised into silence; he'd thought he'd seen every side there was to Starr, but he'd never seen her so angry before or…dark. Even when she was upset, she always had this…_light_ about her, but it seemed as though it had been snuffed out.

"Starr, you're _hurt_, I can't ignore that. Did somebody do this to you?" he asked in a low voice, struggling to remain calm even though the mere idea of somebody hitting Starr had him digging his nails into his palm until it was painful.

"What?" she cried, eyes wide, before furrowing her brow and shaking her head. "God, no, are you insane? I had an accident in gym class."

"What accident?" he asked immediately. Starr paused and stammered for a moment, just like he'd known she would.

"I, uh- we were playing volleyball, a girl on the other team spiked it and I got hit in the face."

"So, if I talk to your gym teacher, she's gonna tell me that's what happened?"

"Why would you talk to my gym teacher?! And I don't know if she saw it happen!"

"If it was bad enough to do that, I don't see how she couldn't have. You're lying to me, Starr; why? Since when have you ever hidden anything from me?"

_'Since you made it clear you weren't interested in listening anymore,_ Starr thought to herself sarcastically.

"Are you trying to protect someone? Did your dad do this?" he spat, Todd instantly coming to mind as someone Starr would look out for even at the expense of her own safety. "I know I said I understood wanting to protect your parent, but I didn't-"

"No! Nobody _did_ this to me, it was an accident!" she all but shrieked. "And this is none of your business anyway."

"How can it not be?" he asked in a low voice, furrowing his brow. Starr just shook her head, lips pursed tightly. "Starr, don't put yourself in danger because you're mad at me," Schuyler said, almost pleading. She cocked an eyebrow.

"As in, I wouldn't be in 'danger' if I told you whatever was going on? Because you'd rush in to save me or something?" Starr asked with a snort, her cynical tone sounding strange and foreign. Schuyler stared at her quietly for a moment, and then without even thinking, nodded.

"Yes. That's exactly what I'd do." She seemed to find his answer ridiculous, but he knew it was true; there was nothing he wouldn't do for Starr; he'd already proven that by destroying his own heart when he'd pushed her out of his life the way he had. If she _needed_ saving, unbelievable as that idea would have seemed to him prior to this day considering how strong and self-reliant she was, he'd do it, no questions asked.

"Well, then, good thing there's nothing to save me from, right? Because I'm pretty sure getting involved would cause you to lose your job, and that's the last thing we want, right? I've already been enough of a _problem_ for you."

"Starr, I-

"Shouldn't you be getting home, _Mr. Joplin?_" He flinched. That name never sounded right coming from her. "I'm sure Stacy's waiting for you," she snapped, shoving her chair back violently and rising to her feet.

"Starr, please, just give me a minute to-"

"No!" she shouted, actually clamping her hands over her ears for a moment.

Schuyler truly didn't understand how much pain this was causing her, how difficult he was making this for her. She had fallen completely and utterly in love with him even as her brain screamed at her not to; Langston could try to convince her Schuyler was just her way of acting out, but Starr knew better, and she knew what she felt was real. She had trusted him, more than anyone in the world, to never hurt her, only to have him rip out her heart and stomp on it.

That wasn't even the worst part. She could have handled it if he just didn't have feelings for her, she would have been perfectly happy to keep him as her friend, but he wanted absolutely nothing to do with her at all. He had called her a "problem" for him because of all the trouble she'd caused by kissing him. Worse yet, he'd made a mockery of the connection she _knew_ they'd had, insisting it only formed out of loneliness and desperation on their parts, that they never would have been anything but student and teacher if it weren't for the coincidence of his mom being her doctor. He'd actually said she had a little crush on him and it was nothing more, that Cole was who she really wanted. It was like he'd been reading from some script Langston had written him. Why did the two of them think they knew her own heart better than she did?

But now, here he was, acting as caring and understanding as he always had before that horrible day, seeming like the guy she'd fallen for in the first place, acting like he truly wanted to help her, and it was _killing_ her, because this had to be pity. She didn't want _pity_ from him of all people, and that was obviously what this was- why would he care otherwise?

"You don't get to decide when things can get personal with us and when they can't, that's not how it works! It's one way or the other, and you chose this way."

Starr knew very well how immature and petty she sounded, but she didn't have the energy or strength to care right now; her life had been hell the past few days, even moreso than usual, and she'd been dealing with it all alone, and she was tired, and for once, she wanted to be selfish, without concern for everybody else's feelings.

"I am not your friend, you made that perfectly clear, so you don't get to ask about things that happen outside of this classroom, and you don't get to call me anything but Miss. Manning."

"Wait, Starr," he called out to her as her hand touched the door, rising to his feet as well. She stiffened but stopped, tensely waiting for him to speak further.

At that moment, Schuyler nearly broke and told her everything; he almost told her that he hadn't meant a word of what he'd said, that far from wanting her to be nothing but his student, he wanted her to be his everything, that she was right and there was something between them, and most of all, that he was just so _sorry_, both for whatever had happened to her, and for what _he'd_ done, that had left her feeling like she couldn't come to him.

Unfortunately, Schuyler's logical side chose this, the worst possible moment, to kick in and start screaming at him, overwhelming every other thought he'd just had. He couldn't do this to her, complicate her life and mess with her head any further; he would do whatever it took to figure out what had happened and help her, but he had to do it from a distance. Starr needed to believe that she was nothing but another student to him, it was the only way for her to get past this and be with someone better for her. Once Cole got clean and healed from the wounds that had pushed him to drugs in the first place, that was who she belonged with, and despite the bond the two of them shared, Schuyler knew that Cole was who Starr really wanted, rough as that fact might be to swallow.

So, Schuyler simply took a deep breath and bowed his head without saying a word, never seeing the flicker of disappointment in Starr's eyes before she flung the door open and stormed out.


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you **SO** much for reviewing, I really appreciate it!

**Chapter 2**

What Schuyler saw when his class started after that weekend almost made him wonder if Friday's events had really been some horrible nightmare; if it weren't for the faded but still visible bruise marring Starr's otherwise perfect skin, he might actually believe it had been.

The difference between her behavior then and now was like the difference between night and day; Starr was practically _glowing_ with joy as she walked into his classroom, a brilliant smile lighting up her face, and her eyes were awash with peace and contentment. She looked like she was walking on air, like nothing could possibly bring her down, and Schuyler practically basked in the sight of her like that, unable to help grinning because just the sight of her in that state overjoyed him too. Starr should always be that happy, she deserved nothing less.

"You seem to be feeling better, Miss. Manning," he couldn't help but comment as he passed while gathering their homework, hoping to hear her usual bright tone for the first time in what felt like ages.

"What? Oh, yeah, so much better, you have no idea," she said with a light laugh, without the slightest bit of anger or resentment in her tone; it was just the way she used to talk to him, and Schuyler's heart was lifted even further.

Maybe he'd been wrong after-all and that was why Starr had gotten so upset; maybe she really had just gotten into an accident in gym and her behavior had only been because of _him._ Maybe she was just…forgetting about him, letting go like he'd wanted her to, and that was why she was getting back to her old self. If it meant Starr being happy again, then Schuyler was thrilled to be forgotten, he really meant that.

"Oh, uh, Mr. J, I'm sorry, I don't have the work done," she said quickly when he came to her desk. "I understand that's an automatic fifteen points off, I'm sorry, I won't make it thirty."

Behind her, Langston looked as surprised as Schuyler felt. The only other time he could recall Starr not having an assignment ready on time was the day she'd told him she'd gone to visit her baby's grave and had spent all night thinking about her. He frowned curiously; logic would say that was what had happened again, but Starr certainly wouldn't seem so joyful if that was the case.

"That's fine; just make sure you have it in tomorrow, okay?"

"Of course."

Schuyler shot her a quick smile, and to his pleasant surprise, she returned it. For the first time since she'd left his classroom on Friday, Schuyler had a clear head and felt like he could breathe easy. As he walked back to his own desk, he couldn't help overhearing the quiet conversation behind him.

"Hey!" Langston said, poking her friend in the stomach with the eraser end of her pencil to get her attention. Starr just laughed as she pushed her hand away. "What is with you today? You're practically dancing and singing in the halls, and somehow, you just seem to get happier every five seconds. You're killing me, what's up?"

"I told you that I can't tell you yet, but I will let you know the _second_ I can, okay?"

"This better be good," she grumbled playfully. Starr just laughed again, shaking her head.

"A million times better than good, trust me."

To say Schuyler's curiosity was piqued was a vast understatement; he was desperate to know who or what had made her so happy, so he could personally thank them if it was a who or made sure it happened often if it was a what, but that wasn't his place anymore. Starr was happy without him, as she should be, and it was more than enough for Schuyler to have this knowledge and get to see her beaming face as he taught the class.

Starr and her friends usually lingered a minute and were among the last to leave, but this day, the girl shot of her seat the second the bell rang, and was out the door before anyone else was even close. He stared after her in surprise for a moment, then just chuckled, shaking his head affectionately as Langston and Markko shared a bewildered look before leaving themselves.

Schuyler was still at his desk twenty minutes later, reading a student's assignment in utter befuddlement (someone had obviously not done the assigned reading and just tried to fake their way through it, never a good idea) when he heard footsteps outside the door and glanced up in time to see Starr hurrying past, heaving a sigh of frustration and muttering to herself. His brow furrowed slightly and he stared out the doorway, wondering what was going on, only to have his silent question answered a moment later.

"Cole, oh my God, there you are!" he heard her shriek joyously, unable to see the pair from here. Ah- so that must have been what she was so happy about, Cole. His stomach twisted uncomfortably, but Schuyler ignored it; he'd wanted this, he'd told her to do this. "Where have you been?! I called you about a thousand times last night, I went over to your house, I called you a thousand more times today, I looked for you everywhere-"

"Oh, so now you actually want to talk to me?"

"Cole, I'm sorry about everything, but you need to be quiet and listen because I have something to tell you that's way more important, okay?" she ordered, though somehow, the happy note didn't leave her tone. "Look, I have the most _amazing_ news."

Starr passed by the doorway once more, walking in the opposite direction and tugging Cole behind her. As their footsteps faded away, Schuyler frowned deeply. He wasn't jealous, he _wasn't_, he couldn't be, but…he had intended for Starr to go back to Cole once he was _clean._ She couldn't possibly be thinking about getting back together with him now, could she? Cole had only been attending court ordered rehab sessions and getting drug testing done for a couple of days; and Schuyler knew from experience that drug testing was easy enough to get past if you had the resources; Starr wouldn't take a chance like this when the boy could still be messed up, would she?

Schuyler felt an intense, powerful surge of worry as he remembered the night of the dance; he recalled telling Starr not to come near Cole and truly believing it would be dangerous if she did, practically tackling Cole when he'd made a move to follow Starr and Langston, seeing far too familiar a gleam in the young boy's eyes- it was the same look Schuyler used to have during his own drug induced rage fits. He should have left the moment Starr kissed him, before other teachers could hear the commotion and come along, but Cole's behavior had been the whole reason he hadn't- at that moment, he truly hadn't trusted the kid's state of mind enough to leave him alone with Starr.

Schuyler contemplated for all of three seconds before making his decision, rising from his seat and walking to the door where he hovered around, listening carefully. He couldn't hear them, but that was a good thing; everybody in the entire school had been able to hear Cole the night of the dance- if there was a problem, he'd know.

There was nothing but silence for a good ten minutes, and Schuyler had just started to suspect he was just being overprotective, considering how much he cared about Starr and how worried he'd been all weekend, when he suddenly heard a faint shout and perked his ears up, listening for any sign that this was more than a lovers' quarrel. God only knew he had no business getting involved in student affairs, especially when it came to this student, but he knew without a doubt he'd interfere if he had to.

"Why not, Starr?! Give me one good reason!" Schuyler tensed, gripping the doorframe tightly.

"The way you're talking to me right now says it all!"

"Oh, please, we both know this has nothing to do with me!" Starr lowered her voice, and Schuyler couldn't hear her response. "Yeah, I'm talking about him; you're obviously already thinking about him, we might as well get it out in the open! This doesn't have a damn thing to do with me, this is about you being messed up and having the hots for Mr. J- what, didn't get enough the first time he rammed his tongue down your threat?"

"You don't even know what you're talking about Cole; how many times do I have to tell you that wasn't his fault, that I kissed him?! And this is really what you're focusing on, _now?_"

"Yeah, I'm choosing to focus on you and your perv teacher scre-"

"Don't you even finish that sentence, and don't say that about Schuyler!" she snapped.

Schuyler's heart ached; she would defend him to Cole of all people, even after what he'd done to her? What the hell had he ever done to deserve her? That was it; Cole's voice left little room for doubt that he'd broken the agreement he'd made during his sentencing to stay clean, and Starr obviously didn't want to deal with him- he was getting involved, boundaries be damned.

Down the hall, Starr was staring at Cole- she hated even calling this version of him by his name, he may as well have been a stranger- in disbelief, taking deep breaths to try and calm this pounding anger inside of her. He had ruined this; she'd given him the most spectacular news the two of them would ever hear, and he managed to act decent for a few minutes, sure, but then he turned back into this monster. After what he'd done Thursday night that had made Schuyler freak on Friday, after swearing how sorry he was, here he was again, screaming at her, blaming all of his problems on Schuyler, intimidating her with that manic look in his eyes…

That look said it all. Starr's stomach twisted fearfully as she realized he was high yet again, and tears of frustration spilled over, blurring her vision and burning her eyes; what the hell was _wrong_ with him? After what had happened before the weekend, after what had happened with _Matthew_, after being warned that if he didn't quit drugs cold turkey he was going to _jail_, he still got high. Was he just beyond saving now? The thought caused a quiet sob to escape her.

"Why not?" Cole thundered, stepping even further into her personal space. She nervously stepped away until her back hit the lockers.

"He doesn't deserve that, he's a good-"

"Why are you defending _him_ to _me?!_ Would you do the same for me?"

"I wouldn't have to, because Schuyler would never say anything bad about you!"

"He shouldn't be saying anything about me at all!" Cole exploded, throwing the books in his hands carelessly; they hit the wall with a loud bang, and Starr shrieked in surprise.

"Cole, please calm down," she begged quietly. "You're high, and-"

"Oh, what, did 'Schuyler' tell you that?" he demanded, shooting his fist out and punching the locker next to her, leaving his hand there so she was effectively caged in. Starr shrank back, biting her lip as she fought not to cry any more. She couldn't believe she had ever known this person, ever loved them.

"You and I are supposed to be together, Starr!" he hissed, gripping her arm tightly. "Why can't you see that?! Everybody else does!"

"Cole, stop it, you're scaring me!" she shouted tearfully. The worst part was, that was absolutely true; _Cole_ was scaring her.

"Maybe you need to be scared, maybe _that'll_ finally wake you up from this fantasy you're having! We have a child together, Starr! You and I fought so hard to be together, what we have is _real_, and you're throwing it away for your teacher! What is wrong with-"

Suddenly, Cole was cut off as somebody grabbed the back of his shirt and flung him violently into the lockers behind them. Starr's head whipped around in shock, and her eyes widened, stunned, when she saw that it was Schuyler who had ripped Cole away from her. He was breathing heavily through clenched teeth, starring at Cole with a look in his eyes Starr had never seen before, that she couldn't name.

An intense wave of relief crashed through Starr, and without even thinking or realizing what she was doing, she suddenly flung herself into his arms, an anguished sob escaping her as she buried her head against the crook of his neck, clinging to him desperately as every ounce of worry and fear she'd been bottling up since she'd been unable to turn to him came pouring out.

The tension instantly escaped Schuyler's body as he focused solely on Starr, drawing her in closer and holding her to him tightly and safely in a protective embrace as he quietly murmured words of comfort in her ear, his hands rubbing soothing circles on her back. He could feel her tears on his neck and nuzzled his cheek against the top of her head, breathing in the familiar scent of her hair as he mentally thanked her for throwing herself into his arms; right now, he didn't know what he would have done to Cole if she hadn't. After seeing him towering over Starr, screaming at her as she looked terrified and like she wanted to disappear into the lockers, Schuyler didn't trust his self-control one bit. If he found out his current suspicions were right and Cole had been the cause of her injury on Friday, he was going to need Starr by his side 24/7 to guarantee he didn't do something to Cole that would get him thrown in jail for life. How could he not have suspected on Cole on Friday? After his behavior at the dance, Cole should have been the first person to come to mind! Why the hell had he been so convinced Cole had been a good guy for her?

Speak of the devil- he heard Cole's footsteps and he glanced over the top of Starr's head at the boy with dangerously narrowed eyes. Cole was staring at the two of them with an utterly stunned expression; he slowly glanced from them, to the forgotten books on the floor, to the lockers he'd had Starr caged in against, and his eyes grew wide with disbelief as his breathing shortened. Schuyler knew this phase, coming down from the high and realizing just what the hell you'd done, all too well. His heart would usually go out to anybody struggling just as he had, but after this, he was no longer capable of sympathy towards Cole.

"Starr," Cole breathed, starting to move towards them as he shook his head. "Oh my God, I'm so-"

Without even thinking, Schuyler instinctively twisted his body to shield Starr further, keeping one arm tightly wound around her as he reached out and gave Cole a violent shove back, sending the boy stumbling back once again. Starr remained pressed tightly to his chest, never once looking up; her shoulders continued to tremble as soft cries escaped her lips, and Schuyler comfortingly stroked her hair.

"Don't, Cole," he hissed, his eyes sending a clear warning as well. "Just don't."

"Mr. Joplin?"

Schuyler quickly glanced behind him and saw Mr. Travers and Mrs. Lane, two other teachers at the school, staring at the scene in confusion. Mrs. Lane's eyes slowly drifted over him and Starr and narrowed as they did so- obviously, she was recalling the night of the dance and the agreement he'd made when he'd been given his job back.

Schuyler knew the last thing he should be doing was touching Starr in front of anyone at this school, let alone other teachers, but she didn't make a move to pull away, so neither did he. To be blunt, Schuyler didn't give a shit about the other teachers right now, he didn't care if he lost his job. Starr was the _only_ thing that mattered, and she needed him, and he'd be damned if let her down again; he dared someone to try and pry him away from her before she wanted to let go.

"Mr. Joplin, what happened? The students in the music room said they heard a big commotion."

"Mr. Thornhart seems to have used drugs on school grounds, in direct violation of his sentencing and probation, and was harassing Miss. Manning when I came along," he answered, his voice not betraying the furious anger he felt at those words; he kept his tone even, not wanting to scare the girl nestled in his arms.

"Is that so, Mr. Thornhart?" Mr. Travers asked tightly, walking over to the teen. Cole's gaze lingered on Starr for a moment, and he appeared torn, but a second later the drugs won yet again and he swallowed roughly as his eyes hardened.

"No, I'm not high," he spat. "I got into an argument with my ex-girlfriend, big deal. Not my fault teach here is obsessed with Starr and felt the need to butt in and make a big deal of it."

"Hmm; you're not high, really?" Mr. Travers asked, already seeing the answer in the boy's eyes. "Well, then you shouldn't have a problem giving a urine sample, right here, right now, should you?"

Cole opened his mouth to protest, appearing on the verge of another blow-up, and Schuyler instantly interjected.

"Mr. Travers, think you could take him somewhere else to talk about this?" he asked quietly, giving a slight nod to Starr. The other man flashed him a look of understanding and steered Cole, already beginning to protest, away.

"Starr, honey," Mrs. Lane said gently, tentatively stepping closer. "We're going to need to hear your side of the story, it's very important. Think you can come with me and do that?"

Starr slowly took a deep breath, pulling away from Schuyler just enough to look him in the eyes and allow him to see that her own were filled with anxiety. Schuyler instinctively cupped her cheek and brushed at her tears with his thumb, smiling reassuringly. She seemed calmed and turned to the other teacher, still not leaving the safety of Schuyler's arms.

"I can't just give a ditto to everything Mr. Joplin said?" she asked hopefully. Mrs. Lane laughed gently.

"I'm afraid not. I promise we won't take up too much of your time."

Starr bit her lip and slowly nodded, reluctantly stepping out of Schuyler's embrace; he instantly felt just…empty without her. She glanced between the two teachers silently for a moment until Mrs. Lane got it; she frowned, her brow furrowing, but stepped a few feet away even though she looked far from happy about it.

Starr looked up at Schuyler nervously, unable to help feeling embarrassed by her meltdown, but he just gazed at her patiently.

"Are you okay, Starr?" he murmured, too low for Mrs. Lane to hear. She smiled a little too quickly and nodded, wiping her eyes.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine, I just um…I don't want to go in there alone," she confessed in a rush before bowing her head, already bracing herself for his rejection, for another reminder about student and teacher boundaries now that she had calmed down enough to listen.

It was just…she had gotten so used to turning to Schuyler, being able to rely on him, that not having him had made her feel acutely lonely throughout the struggles of the last week, and now that she'd had him by her side again, even just for a few minutes, the isolation was going to feel more pressing than ever if she had to go in there and talk about Cole, _Cole_, getting high and harassing her (which she still couldn't fully believe had just happened), all by herself.

"Then you won't."

Starr looked up sharply, startled by his warm reassurance, expecting him to take it back at any second. He did no such thing, and slowly, she managed a tiny but genuine smile.

"Thank you."

Schuyler's heart was growing heavier with guilt every second; she shouldn't have to _thank_ him for that. He knew Starr better than anybody, better than he knew himself; he knew damn well she could have handled it if he had just been honest with her and told her why he couldn't be with her. Why had he been cruel to the point that she had to look terrified to ask him to keep her from having to face this on her own? Why the hell had he pushed her on Cole and created this hideous situation that she never should have had to face at _all?_ He'd told himself he was trying to convince her to be with Cole because it was safer, because he didn't want her to get hurt- well, a whole lot of good that had done.

No, the truth was, Schuyler was a coward, and his history with addiction had left him terrified over his level of self-control, of his ability to maintain something good. So, he'd let fear get the best of him and he'd taken the easy way out with Starr by just not facing her at all so he wouldn't have to risk hurting her. Ironically, it was his attempt to protect her that had led to her being hurt worse than ever, and his attempt to keep from destroying the only good thing in his life had been what led to him doing exactly that. Why did Starr even _want_ him around her anymore?

"Please, don't thank me," was all he managed to quickly choke out. He needed to be honest with her, she deserved that, finally, but he couldn't exactly do it with Mrs. Lane standing five feet away. "Starr, before we go in there, I need you to tell me something- is Cole the one who did that to you?" he asked gently, eyes pointedly drifting to the bruise on her skin. She sighed.

"Yes and no. Yes, he caused it, but no, he didn't hit me. It was an accident, and I don't think they need to know about that. We both know he's gonna fail that drug test anyway," she spat. "That's going to seal his fate no matter _what_ I say."

"Okay, but…I just want to make sure you don't feel like you need to protect-"

"Trust me," she interrupted, her voice becoming heated. "Protecting Cole is the absolute last thing on my mind right now."

He opened his mouth to protest, but quickly shut it; she'd said to trust her, and he did. Besides, Starr wasn't the liar here; that was his position, not hers.

"Okay," he repeated simply. "Are you ready for this?"

"I guess," she sighed uncomfortably.

They both turned, and Starr flinched when she saw Mrs. Lane's eyes darting between the two of them with clear discomfort. Why had she even been hurt when Schuyler had called her a problem when it was obviously _true?_

"Starr, can you go on ahead to the office?" she asked kindly. "I'll be there in just a moment."

"Oh, um…okay," she hedged, looking at Schuyler nervously once more; like she'd just been thinking, turning to him had just become instinctual. Even now, as he was likely at risk of losing his job once again because she'd been stupid and clingy, he tried to soothe her with the look he shot her over Mrs. Lane's shoulder. With a deep breath, Starr began to walk down the hallway, talking small steps.

"Why aren't we going with her, what do you want?" Schuyler asked impatiently once Starr was out of earshot. He usually would never dream of talking to a colleague like that, but he'd told Starr he'd be right there with her, and he didn't want to let her down all over again.

"Joplin, I think it'd be best if you stay here."

"No," he said instantly, calmly but firmly. It simply wasn't an option.

"No?" she repeated, cocking an eyebrow. "Schuyler, I think I should remind you that it's your relationship with Miss. Manning that you got you suspended, and they only let you back after you promised to have no private contact with her. You've clearly already broken that, based on what Mr. Travers and I walked in on." Schuyler stared at her in disbelief, shaking his head in frustration.

"My student had just been harassed by her strung-out, angry ex-boyfriend, she was scared and desperate for reassurance; what would you have had me do? Tell her to stay away from me even though she was in that state?"

"Of course not," she sighed. "Look, Joplin, it's not bad to care about your students, but you have to understand that you and Starr Manning are not in the same situation as the rest of us. I understand that she needed somebody at that moment, fine, but I don't think you need to make it worse by accompanying-"

"She needs somebody now too!"

"I'll be there."

Schuyler barely managed to keep himself from blurting out what he was thinking- that she wasn't him, and that for some insane, completely illogical reason he couldn't understand, Starr wanted _him,_ and after all he'd done, it was the absolute least he could give her. Mrs. Lane studied him carefully for a moment, her face giving nothing away.

"But that won't be enough for her, will it?" she asked quietly, cocking her head to the side. Schuyler didn't answer; damned if you damned if you don't question right there. "Joplin, what is going on with you two?"

"Nothing," he answered sharply. "She's my student, and I'm worried about her after the scene I came across- she was terrified; you'd feel the same way." Mrs. Long was quiet for a long time after that, but Schuyler didn't have it in him to worry about whatever she may have been thinking; his attention and worry were all far too gone on Starr to care about himself.

"I probably would," she finally spoke in a quiet voice. "Okay, look; I understand why you two seemed so close today, why she needs you so much right now, and…and I don't think admin needs to hear about it. But I'm not going to feel this way twice. Understand?" Schuyler gave a short nod, exhaling roughly. "Okay, come on; let's get down there before you have a heart attack."

"Thank you," he breathed, not even bothering to pretend that wasn't how he actually felt. The woman almost smiled in spite of herself but quickly caught it.

The two of them quickly reached the office, where Starr was anxiously waiting for them. The girl proceeded to spend the next thirty minutes telling her story to the principal, the guidance counselor, someone from the court involved with Cole's case, and the drug counselor assigned to him.

Schuyler remained near her the entire time, and though he tried to help, jumping in to answer as many questions as possible so she wouldn't have to, Starr found that his mere presence was the most comforting thing to her. The time felt like it was passing agonizingly slowly, particularly when they were on the topic of just what they'd been fighting over that had caused Cole to blow up, but it did pass and finally, it was over, and Schuyler thankfully didn't seem to be in any deeper trouble because of her, everybody believing Cole's jealousy was just a drug induced delusion, nothing with any basis in reality.

Nobody would answer her questions about what was going to happen to Cole now, and soon enough, everybody filed out of the room to 'deal with the situation', as they'd all put it, leaving Starr and Schuyler alone, with the reassurance that someone had been called and would be there to pick her up soon.

There was an awkward silence settling into the room now that they were alone; that was unusual for the two of them, but neither was quite certain where to go from here, and both knew they were in a more sensitive place than ever right now. The last actions the two of them had taken towards each other clearly seemed to be the wrong ones- Schuyler had been suspended from teaching and Cole had completely lost it in the first place thanks to Starr kissing him in the middle of the crowded school, and Schuyler's choice had to led to all of _this_- and now, the two of them were just afraid to make a move at all, for fear of miss-stepping again and making things worse yet.

"Sc…Mr. J," Starr corrected herself as she began hesitantly, nervously eyeing the surrounding rooms. "I think we, um, need-"

"Oh, Starr, sweetie, your step-dad is here to pick you up," the secretary of the office interrupted as she breezed into the room.

Schuyler felt a cold rush of disappointment that she hadn't been allowed to finish, but it was overshadowed seconds later as he processed what he'd just heard- Starr's _step-dad?_ What the hell was she talking about? Starr didn't _have_ a step-dad.

"There you are! Starr, what happened, are you okay?"

Schuyler blinked and did a double take as John poked his head into the room, speaking to Starr, and he was further stunned as Starr stood with a forced smile, walking over to him. _What?_ Since when the hell was John Starr's _step-father?_ How had this even happened in the time that they hadn't been speaking? Only now did Schuyler truly begin to understand how much Starr had been left to process on her own, and his fury with himself just grew.

"Hi, John. I'm fine, it's a long story; I'll tell you in the car." Starr turned and gave Schuyler a small smile, hiding her frustration over the fact that all she wanted was to stay with _him._ She could tell he was concerned, confused, and every bit as mixed up as she was right now, but all he could do was return the smile. "Good night, Mr. Joplin."

"Night, Starr," he replied quietly, watching with longing eyes as she walked out the door.


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry if you got an alert for this chapter twice, I accidentally deleted it once, lol. Oh, if you're a scarr fan, check out my profile for a link to the Scarr message board, we'd love to have you join us!

**Chapter 3**

Late that night, Schuyler was lying on his couch in silence, not having to struggle to think over Stacy's blaring music for what felt like the first time in weeks, but as he stared at the phone in his hand, the battle of wills he was having with himself somehow seemed just as loud.

He shouldn't even _have_ a student's cell phone number, so that was another mark in the 'don't bother her' column. On the other hand, this…_aching_ inside of him seemed to grow worse every minute, and Schuyler knew the sound of her voice was the only thing that was going to stop it.

God, he needed a sponsor, just like he'd had for the drugs; somebody to call who could talk him down from the ledge when he got too close to her, when he couldn't stop thinking about her; at this rate, though, he was going to be on the phone with them 24/7.

For a brief moment, Schuyler almost wished the events of the dance had never happened, so he wouldn't be in this position, so he could call Starr without a second of thought, but he instantly erased that thought- it just wasn't true. Even after everything that had come afterwards, Schuyler selfishly couldn't bring himself to regret that kiss.

He had just set his phone on the table so he could restart the process of staring at it contemplatively for the next five minutes when he was drawn out of his thoughts by an unexpected knock at his door. Schuyler glanced up, confused, rising to answer it with an irritated sigh as he realized who it must have been.

"Stacy, I swear to God, if you-"

Schuyler slowly trailed off as he opened the door and came face to face with not Stacy, but Starr, the very girl who had been haunting his thoughts all night. Schuyler felt the usual tightness in his chest at the sight of her. Her arms were crossed over her chest protectively, as if she was trying to physically hold herself together, her eyes watery and nervous.

"Starr," he breathed in surprise

"Um, hi," she said weakly, her voice faltering as her shoulders slumped. "I'm um…oh God, I'm so sorry, you're expecting Stacy, and I know I shouldn't be here, I'll just go."

Shaking her head, Starr turned to leave, but Schuyler reacted quickly, shutting off his head and just letting himself react instinctively; he gently placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Starr, wait, don't go, please. I'm not expecting anyone, you're more than welcome here."

She slowly turned to him, her eyes filled with a hesitant sort of hope.

"I…I don't want to bother you."

Schuyler would have laughed if he wasn't so worried- if only she knew.

"Starr, I want you here," he admitted quietly. He couldn't lie anymore, he just couldn't. "Please, stay."

Starr stared at him for a moment, studying him, and then slowly nodded, stepping through the doorway. Schuyler nervously licked his lips as he shut the door behind her.

"Starr, what are you doing here? Did something happen?"

"Yes," she sighed, ruffling her hair. "Well, no; I…uh, I don't even know how to explain it, I don't know why I'm here. Everyone just kind of lost it when they heard what happened, and they were asking me all these questions that I didn't know how to answer. And then Marty- uh, Cole's mom- showed up, and she was just losing it, and she and John got into this big fight, and it was just way too much and I couldn't _take_ it," she choked out, voice straining. "I left with John and asked him to take me to see Langston, but after he dropped me off, I realized that I just _knew_ she wasn't going to understand. I knew she wouldn't understand and that she would be on Cole's side like she _always_ seems to be lately, and I can't deal with that right now, so I just left, and I didn't even know where I was _going_ until I wound up here. I guess I just…knew I needed to be with someone who would understand, and you always do," she finished in a soft voice, perching on the edge of his couch and bowing her head shyly.

Schuyler took a deep breath; there were a lot of things he wanted to say in response to that, but she still seemed so jittery, and he didn't want to mix her up even further or scare her into leaving.

"I, uh, heard from Mrs. Lane," he said, clearing his throat. She glanced up curiously. "She told me what's happening to Cole. Apparently Tea got involved, and after a lot of smooth talking on her part, got Cole out of jail time; he has to complete an intensive detox and rehabilitation program, and he'll have to stay at the center 24/7- Marty can't even visit the first week."

"Good- maybe this will finally do some good for him; he obviously can't do this on his own." Schuyler nodded and sat down next to her, anxiously rubbing his hands together as he prepared to ask the question that couldn't wait any longer.

"Starr, what did Cole do last week?" he asked heatedly. "What did he do to cause this?"

Without giving himself time to think twice and stop, Schuyler gently brushed his fingers across the bruise to clarify what he meant. Starr shut her eyes, feeling a shiver race through her spine, and fought not to lean into his touch.

"Um," she stammered, desperately trying to think around the haze his brief touch had momentarily left her mind in. "It started out kind of like today did. The night of the dance…" Or, as Starr had come to think of it, the night she'd ruined her entire freaking life. "I was _so_ furious at Cole for what he did to you- for _everything_ he did, really, and for just getting worse and worse with every day. I left him this really horrible message, and I even said I didn't care what happened to him anymore. I felt horrible about that later, and when I ran into him at court- uh, explanation for that is coming up too- I tried to apologize, but he didn't believe me. Turns out, he listened to the message in the hospital, so now I felt even worse. So, I tried again Thursday, after school, and he seemed to notice how upset I was and actually heard me out.

"He seemed a little strung out, but he was actually listening to my problems and being nice and everything, and he just really seemed like the old Cole for the first time in forever, so I wasn't…careful like I usually am with him these days. I was rambling on about everything else, and it just kind of slipped out- I said that one of the things I was depressed about was…" Starr suddenly hesitated, glancing at Schuyler nervously; she didn't want him to pull back again now, she couldn't take that. "Was something he didn't want to hear. He freaked out, and we got into an argument, and he threw his books everywhere without thinking like he did today, but that time one of them hit me in the face, hence…" She trailed off uncomfortably, gesturing to her face. Schuyler glowered, clenching his fists painfully tight as his stomach twisted and turned. "It immediately made him come back to his senses, and he honestly seemed like he was _so_ horrified by what he did, and so I thought…maybe this is his wake up call. I should have known better, though, because if Matthew wasn't, I don't what the hell is going to do it," she spat.

She looked to Schuyler, waiting for his response, and slowly frowned in confusion; his head was cradled in his hands and he was staring at the floor as he breathed heavily.

"Schuyler?" His name came out as a question, and she cautiously touched his shoulder.

He startled as she touched him, and Starr's eyes grew wide as he dug his fingers into his hair, wildly shaking his head for a minute before shoving himself off of the couch, pacing around frantically. He muttered something that Starr couldn't quite catch, but she was pretty sure she heard 'fucking idiot' at some point, and her already widened eyes all but grew to the size of dinner plates; oh god, was he having a nervous breakdown or something?

"Schuyler?" she tried again and his head finally snapped up to look at her.

Starr felt a rush of surprise and pain at the overwhelming _guilt_ and self-directed anger she saw in his eyes; it was the exact same way he'd looked when he'd told her about his history with drugs, about all the ways he'd done his mother wrong. What was going on? What could he possibly have to be angry with himself for right now?

"Starr," he began, his voice shaking. Starr felt a sense of disbelief; the _only_ time she had ever seen him shaken up was during the incidents she'd just thought about. Otherwise, _she_ was always the mess while he was the calm, assured, unflappable one. "You two got into an argument over the same thing you did today, didn't you?"

"Yeah," she finally admitted with great reluctance, licking her lips. "I. um…I told him that one of my problems was that…I missed you," she sighed.

"Oh God, Starr, I'm sorry, I am _so_ sorry," he moaned, his tone thick with self-loathing. Starr shook her head, utterly bewildered.

"For _what_?"

"You shouldn't even want to be around me, Starr! Considering who I am and everything I've done to you, you shouldn't want anything to do with me."

"Okay, but I _do_," she replied in frustration, tired of being told by other people what she _should_ feel. "I _want_ to be around you, no matter what you might think about yourself, and I'm not going to leave, not now, so will you please just…explain? Why are you sorry, why are you freaking out?"

"Starr, this, what happened to you, is all my fault," he choked out. "Because of my own lack of willpower, I lied to you, I abandoned you, and I tried to push Cole onto you, and it led to all of this!"

"Schuyler, it is not your fault!" she exclaimed, jumping to her feet. She couldn't believe she was hearing this from him, of all people. "You should know that! You, better than _anyone_ know that we all only have ourselves to blame for our actions. Cole made his _own_ choices and his _own_ mistakes, and they have nothing to do with _you_! If we hadn't fought over you, it just would have been over something else, because when Cole is high he's just looking for any possible reason to blow up- you just happen to be convenient because he knows…how I feel about you," she breathed in a rush, hurrying past the issue before he could try to convince her she didn't, shouldn't, or couldn't feel anything for him again. "And because of the kiss at the dance which was _my_ fault anyway, not yours. _Please_ don't blame this on yourself."

"That's not true," he sighed weakly, shoulders sagging.

"What isn't?"

He looked up at her quickly, seeming surprised, as if he hadn't even realized he'd spoken aloud until she asked. Schuyler hesitated, on the verge of saying something but holding back, and Starr grit her teeth in frustration, going over the last minute of conversation herself; she froze suddenly, replaying something he'd said, and gazed up at him with wide, startled eyes.

"Because of your lack of willpower?" she repeated questioningly.

"What?"

"You said…you said you lied to me, and tried to push me on Cole because of your lack of willpower," she said, her voice growing stronger and more urgent with each word. "What...what are you talking about? Your willpower? What did you lie about? What's not true?" Schuyler bowed his head tensely, and Starr took a deep breath; this was not the time to get emotional, she knew that, but he was killing her. "Schuyler, _please._ If you've been lying to me, just stop now and tell me the _truth._"

Schuyler was just _tired_ at this point; he was tired of trying to pretend Starr didn't mean everything to him, that she wasn't the best part of his day, that he didn't feel a little empty everytime she was gone, that pushing her away hadn't ripped him apart, and her pleading tone broke the already weakened remains of his resolve.

"It's not true that what happened at the dance and everything that came after was your fault, because…because I wanted that kiss too, Starr," he breathed, finally feeling like he could do so easily now that the pressing weight of his lies was being lifted. Starr gaped at him, her jaw dropping slightly- you truly could have knocked her over with a feather. _That_ was the _last_ thing she'd been expecting to hear.

"You…_what?_" she choked out in a dazed voice, not daring to believe this was really happening. Schuyler wasn't even close to done yet.

"Starr, I was lying to myself before the dance, and I've been lying to _you_ ever since. I tried to pretend I didn't have feelings for you, because you're seventeen, and you're my student, and it's wrong for a thousand different reasons, but I couldn't keep it up when you kissed me. I couldn't show it, but I wanted it as much as you did, if not more; even knowing that it would get me suspended from my job, if I could go back in time and keep it from happening, I wouldn't, I don't think I could bring myself to."

"I, but, you…" Starr stammered wildly, shaking her head as her heart thundered so wildly she couldn't believe he didn't hear it. "How could you not?!" she blurted out, the guilt she'd felt over that night rising to the forefront of her mind. "Schuyler, I almost cost you your _job_! I know I freaked out when you said it, but you were _right_, I _am_ a problem for you. How can you even-"

"Oh God, Starr, no," Schuyler said instantly, taking her by the shoulders and speaking firmly, hating to see this proof that his lies had done their job. "I need you to understand, I didn't mean one _word_ of that; you are the _best_ thing that's ever happened to me, not a _problem_, you could never be a problem."

Starr gazed up at him in a dazed manner, hope starting to creep into her eyes. He was gazing at her with such raw honesty, like he was laying his heart out in his hands, and it made her own flutter.

"That's what I meant when I said I lied to you, and abandoned you. I just…I couldn't take being around you after that, I wanted you too much, but I knew it was wrong for me to feel that way, and that somebody like me is the last person you need in your life, and the only option I could see was to push you away. Everything I said to you that day was a complete _lie_ Starr; I practically just thought about everything I felt for you and said the exact opposite! I couldn't bear to be around you, but I was too weak and too much of a coward to just tell you or stay away myself, so I took the easy way out. And is if that weren't enough, I tried to push you towards Cole because I thought he'd be _better_ for you," he spat, tone momentarily thick with anger and irony before instantly fading as he returned his attention to Starr. "And I…thought he was who you really wanted anyway. What I did just seemed better for everyone in the long run," he muttered lamely. "I can see now that's not the case. I'm _sorry_, Starr. It doesn't make up for what I did, it doesn't even begin to, but I don't know what else to say."

Schuyler waited anxiously as Starr went silent, slowly taking a step back as she bowed her head. Taking a deep breath, Starr rubbed her temples, desperately trying to take that all in, sort it out; he'd just dropped one hell of a bomb on her and left her feeling about a million different things, and her heart and her head were in the midst of arguing over which was most pressing.

"You didn't mean it?" she asked slowly, needing to hear it just once more.

"Not a word," he whispered intensely, eyes heavy.

"And you…you feel the same things I do?"

"Yeah, I do, for better or for worse," he confirmed, slowly feeling a smile tug at his lips. "Starr, I think I've been falling for you since the first day we met, and I just can't lie to you or fight it anymore. I still think that you are a lot better off without me, and I know _this_, us, might be next to impossible, or that I might have messed it up beyond belief, and a thousand and one other problems, but when you're around, I just…forget all of that, along with every other bad thing in my life- kind of the reason I tried to push you away, actually. But I'm selfish, and I just don't think I can stand being away from you anymore because it literally feels like it's killing me, so if for some reason you still want me…" Schuyler took a deep breath, then smiled at Starr calmly, feeling more sure of this than he had about anything in a long time. "Then I'm yours."

Starr felt a lump in her throat, and for a second seriously thought she was going to lose it and either burst into tears, throw herself at him, or manage some combination of both, but despite her heart's desperate, screaming insistence that she do _something_ to acknowledge the fact that he had just admitted he was _falling for her_ and was _hers_ if she wanted him, which was so beyond thrilling and intense and mind boggling and unreal that the only words she had were 'ohgodohgodohgodohgod', she stubbornly swallowed it, focusing on the _other_ things he'd said first.

"Schuyler, you are an _idiot_!" she shouted in disbelief. The smile instantly fell from his face, but he didn't looked surprised; she just knew he was thinking about how he deserved this, which somehow just served to upset her further. "Okay, me being your student, fine, that's a fair point, I'll give you that one, but everything else you said is so…_stupid_ that I'm wondering how you even became a teacher!"

In any other situation, Schuyler might have laughed over the spluttering insult, delivered with flailing hands and all, that was nothing he'd ever expected to hear from Starr, but nothing seemed funny right now.

"'Somebody like you'? Like what, Schuyler? Somebody who gets me and is always there for me? Oh, no, how awful! You have no right to decide who I should be with, who's _better_ for me. Look, I get it, because _I_ get _you_ too- your past with drugs pretty much destroyed your sense of self-esteem, but whether you want to believe it or not, you are a _good person._ I would never feel this way about you if you weren't," she cried, clutching at her heart, feeling like it was about to burst out of her chest at this moment. "And you're good for me. Sometimes I feel like nobody understands, and it's like I'm just drowning in loneliness, but when you're there, I feel like I belong with somebody, and you give me something to hang on to. And I'm _happy_ around you, Schuyler, so much, you don't even understand; sometimes, it feels like my heart is just going to burst or something because it can't take it."

He understood perfectly, actually, because Schuyler felt the exact same way.

"And, for the record, I think I would _know_ if I wanted Cole! Again, despite what everybody else seems to think, I know my own heart! Did you think you were, like, a _phase_, that I was using you to act out? Because I got really close to you and let you in pretty far if all I wanted was a way to act out."

"Starr, I was just-"

"And, you know, if had told me all of this stuff you were thinking, we could have figured it out! You didn't need to lie and leave me in the dark. Did you just think I was a stupid kid or something?"

"Of course not, Starr," he replied sharply. "I have never thought you were stupid, or childish, or anything like that, ever. But I think I _needed_ to believe your feelings weren't real and that you were only going to move on in the end, and I needed to push you away instead of just talking to you because I _needed_ you to hate me. Otherwise, I don't think I could have stopped myself."

"From what?!" she demanded, breathing heavily. Schuyler gazed at her heatedly for a moment, the thought that Starr looked particularly beautiful when she was worked up crossing his mind, and at that moment, Schuyler felt every small remain of his self control crumble.

"From doing this," he murmured, closing the minimal distance between them and bringing his lips crashing down onto hers.

Starr instantly sank into his embrace, eagerly responding as Schuyler kissed her hungrily, every feeling and desire the two of them had felt and tried to suppress being poured into the kiss. His hand gently grazed her cheek before moving back to tangle into her hair, as his other hand slipped down to her hip, before slowly moving to the small of her back, leaving Starr feeling like her skin was burning in the most pleasurable way possible where he touched her. He crushed her to him tightly as he tilted her head, deepening the kiss even further, and Starr wound her arms around his waist, somehow feeling like she still wasn't close enough. Her lungs ached for air, but Starr ignored it, because frankly, she wanted this more than she wanted to _breathe._

Eventually, the need for oxygen couldn't be ignored any longer, and the two pulled away, continuing to leave barely any space between them. Starr's eyes flickered up to his anxiously, knowing she wouldn't be able to handle it now if he had a change of heart, but he gave her a heart stopping grin, seeming every bit as exhilarated and happy about the kiss as she did, and he pressed his lips to hers again. She smiled into the kiss, eagerly returning it once more before they separated.

"Schuyler," she said his name, practically panting. "What does this…this means something, right? Where are we going from here?"

"I know that I can't handle being without you anymore, Starr," he murmured, brushing her hair back. She shivered. "I want to make this, _us_, work."

"I want that too. And, you really don't mind what you said earlier, about how this hard is going to be?"

"I don't; being with you is worth anything." It may have sounded like a line, but he meant that to his very core. Starr blushed happily, nodding.

"We're worth fighting for."

He couldn't agree more. Schuyler was good at fighting; he'd fought to hang on to drugs when people had desperately been trying to save him, he'd had the fight of his life getting _off_ of them, he'd fought to piece his life back together afterwards, he'd fought to help others off the path he'd once been on, he'd fought to keep himself away from Starr, and now he had every intention of fighting just as hard to be _with_ her.

Cupping her cheek, Schuyler tenderly kissed her once more before pulling back to speak softly.

"Starr, I'm-"

Starr rose up on her toes and cut him off with a soft brush of her lips, smiling.

"Don't, okay?" she asked gently. "I don't need or want anymore apologies or explanations or anything. We're here now, and what it took to _get_ here doesn't matter anymore. We're good. Well, better than good, so much better than good," she amended, giggling.

He grinned brightly, and, finding that no words could fully encompass how he felt, instead just initiated a hug for once, drawing Starr into his arms. She sighed peacefully, and the two just held each other in silence for several minutes, both finding comfort in each other. Every time something had gone wrong during their separation, _this_ was the only thing the two of them had wanted, and now they finally had it.

Starr was just starting to think that she could stay like this forever, when suddenly, she remembered something else Schuyler had told her that day and felt a cold rush through her chest, causing her to quickly pull back.

"Oh, no," she muttered to herself.

"Starr?" Schuyler asked with a furrowed brow, his tone thick with worry. "What is it, what's wrong?"

"Stacy!" she exclaimed. "I completely forget about her. Did I just-"

"No, Starr!" he said quickly, clenching his eyes shut, frustrated with himself. "You didn't-"

"Oh, God," she moaned, digging her hands into her hair. "What is going on, Schuyler? You _love_ her, you _told_ me you-"

"I do _not_ love Stacy!" he interrupted, loudly and firmly. "Trust me, not even close; I don't even remotely _like_ Stacy at this point. That was just another one of the lies I told you to try and keep you away. I don't care about her, Starr, _you_ are the only one I want. I am so-"

"Don't apologize again, remember?" she interrupted, biting her lip as she took in his words, relaxing. A warm smile crossed her lips as she thought about him saying he wanted only her. "Does, she, um, still live here?"

To be completely blunt, that last sentence made her want to sweep him into another kiss and never let go, but it probably wasn't the best idea if Stacy could come strolling in at any moment.

"No. Actually, I kicked her out."

"What?" she asked, startled. "Why, did something happen?"

"Stacy is not the person I thought she was. Stacy is…y'know what, I'm not gonna mince words," he decided, still so reluctant to talk about the girl he'd once loved this way but knowing it was the honest truth. "Stacy is an evil bitch."

"_Woah,_" Starr laughed. "Okay, I have to know what brought that on."

Schuyler took a seat on the couch, and motioned for her to do the same. She did, and he reflexively wrapped an arm around her waist once she was next to him; Starr smiled, cuddling into his side as he told her the story he, Rex, and Gigi had all heard from Roxy, about Stacy's plan to use her own nephew's disease to steal Rex away, as she'd been obsessed with him since she was fourteen. Starr listened in horror, unable to understand how somebody could use an innocent boy's life as a bargaining tool to destroy her sister's happiness, steal a father away from the mother of his child as their kid struggled with cancer.

"Wow," she breathed simply when he finished, shaking her head. "I can't even believe someone could do something so…_evil._"

"I can't either," he sighed. "I'd say this isn't the Stacy I knew, but just the fact that she's capable of this makes me think it's more like I just never really knew her at all."

"I know what you mean," Starr muttered quietly. He glanced at her curiously, but quickly got it.

"Oh, Starr, I don't think it's the same," he said gently. "The absolute _last_ thing I want to do is defend Cole, _believe_ me, but Stacy chose to do this all on her own; Cole isn't even Cole right now, everything he says or does is just the drugs taking over. I know, I've been there; I want to hate to Cole for what he did to you, but I know I can't because I did things just as bad, if not worse." She nodded heavily, and Schuyler could see she didn't want to talk about her ex any further, so he quickly changed the subject. "Hey, so what were you at court for?" he asked, recalling her mentioning that earlier.

"Oh, God," she groaned. "Well, my dad found another way to let me down in the most spectacular manner possible. When my mom was still in the coma, he took _advantage_ of that to try and get custody of me and my brothers back; even when I told him in no uncertain terms that I didn't _want_ to live with him," she spat, shaking her head. Schuyler squeezed her hand sympathetically as he felt a rush of anger and disgust towards that man, still unable to understand how the hell someone like Todd Manning could have created someone extraordinary as Starr. "Somehow, Tea wound up being on our side, and she came up with a way we could win; if my mom married someone steady and loyal, who could take care of us."

"Someone like John," he filled in, understand. She nodded, starting to grin.

"Yeah. You should have seen your face when John walked in and she called him my stepdad," she laughed brightly. Nothing had seemed funny at that time, but the memory was now. He chuckled.

"I can only imagine. So, wow, you have a stepdad now; how do you feel about that?" he questioned curiously, comfortingly running his fingers through her hair. Starr paused; it was the first time someone had asked how _she_ felt about this whole thing.

"No clue, really," she admitted with a tired laugh. "I've been trying to deal with everything else first, that's last on my list of things to process. John's a really good guy, though, I like him. My mom is really happy about this, I think she wants it to be real, and it kept us in her custody. I guess I'm good with it."

"I'm glad." She smiled, leaning against him peacefully. "Hey, can I ask you one more thing?"

"Ask me anything."

"What were you so happy about today? You looked like you were practically walking on air, and I just…wanted to know, be a part of it," he admitted softly.

Starr gasped, her hands flying to her mouth in surprise, and jumped to her feet.

"Oh my God, oh my God," she muttered. "Oh, _damn it_, Cole. I cannot believe I haven't told you yet, what he did just ruined everything and completely distracted me, I can't believe it. Okay, um…" Starr took a deep breath, covering her face, and Schuyler was shocked to see tears sparkling in her eyes when she moved them away.

"Starr?" he asked simply, rising to his feet. Her face lit up in a brilliant grin.

"Schuyler…Hope's _alive._"

For a moment, you could have heard a pin drop in the room, and Starr almost had to giggle at Schuyler's slack jawed, wide-eyed expression.

"Hope, your…your _daughter_ Hope? Your baby, Hope, that you told me died?"

"Yes, _that_ Hope," she said, the giggle finally escaping her as she felt a rush of euphoric giddiness at his words; every time she thought about it, all she wanted to do was jump up and down, dance around the room, scream; even now, she couldn't help lightly rocking on the balls of her feet.

"She's _alive_?" he choked out.

"Yeah, she's alive," Starr said with a grin, tears spilling over as she said the words. It was never going to stop feeling amazing to say that.

Schuyler just stared at her in stunned silence for a moment, then suddenly, emitted a strangled noise of complete joy, swooped over and swung her around happily, and they both laughed brilliantly, clinging to each other tightly once he set her on her feet, as Starr just cried happy tears against his shoulder, her smile never fading. _This_ was the reaction she'd wanted from someone; she should have known she just needed to turn to Schuyler.

Starr pulled back a moment later, impulsively kissing him again as the adrenaline continued to swell through her veins, and Schuyler eagerly responded, kissing her with such enthusiasm that it left her dizzy. When they finally let go, Schuyler gently brushed her tears away with his thumbs, his face still lit up with a grin.

"Starr, that is _amazing,_" he said, knowing what an incredible understatement it was. He knew how much her baby's death had affected her, and he knew how much this would do the same, but in a positive manner. "How did you even…how did she…_how?_" he finally just asked, making them both laugh again.

"It is a long, insane story, we should probably sit down again," she said, the giddy joy starting to fade as they did so, and she thought of everything she had to tell him. "Okay, well, let's see, where to start…my cousin, Jessica, the one I told you had her baby on the same day as me, has dissociative identity disorder."

Wow. Sometimes Schuyler wondered how Starr had even survived going up with everything she had, and then he remembered she was _Starr_, and that was how; she was strong enough to handle anything.

"She has another personality that takes over when she's going through really hard, stressful times that she can't handle herself, and she has blackouts when the other personality is in control, she doesn't remember a thing that happens. The way it was explained yesterday, which, believe me, was a very slow and very confusing process, Jessica's baby was stillborn." Starr sighed sadly, her heart aching; she knew what kind of agony that was. Schuyler kissed the top of her head supportively, and she relaxed. "When that happened, something inside of her just snapped; a new personality came out, realizing Jessica and her other alternate wouldn't be able to take the news about the baby, and so she took control, and switched Jessica's baby with Hope, and left Jessica with no memory of any of that."

"…wow."

"So you're where I was last night," she laughed, recalling just sitting there, saying that one word over and over for a very long time. John seemed like he was seriously considering taking her to the hospital for possible brain damage.

"How did you even deal with finding this out?" he asked softly. She shrugged, grinning.

"Because I was holding my baby. She was there, and she was alive, and she was safe in my arms, and nothing else mattered anymore."

"Of course," he replied, eyes still lit up just like hers. "So…what happened? How did you find all of this out? How did your cousin take it? What's going to happen now?"

"Well, another cousin of mine, Natalie, and her boyfriend, Jared, found out about the baby switch, it's a really long story how. When they told us about it, Jessica's memories from the time her alternate was in control came rushing back. What happened next was…not good," she told admitted quietly, her shoulders sagging. "When she found out, Jessica, she…she really lost it," she sighed. "She just completely blew up, and it was scary."

That was probably the most intense, frightening thing Starr had ever seen, even including Cole's blow ups at her. Starr's heart, which had just felt like it had grown several sizes due to having her daughter in her arms, had shattered for her cousin; she knew from experience that nobody should feel the pain of losing a child.

"She was screaming, we couldn't even understand what she was saying, and banging on the windows, shaking…" She trailed off for a moment, lost in that horrible memory, but Schuyler squeezed her hand and brought her back down to earth. He held her supportively, and she continued. "But uh, this guy that I think she's kind of got a thing with, Brody, was there with us, and at that point, he grabbed her and just held her to him tightly. She was still wailing and sobbing, and hitting him, and screaming at him to let her go, but he never once did," she recalled, smiling softly as she remembered the sight, remembered feeling like Jessica had found someone really good and that she just might eventually be okay if he always stuck by her side like that. "Eventually, I think she just exhausted herself, and she just kind of gave up and cried in his arms for a really long time. So, yeah, she freaked, of _course_, but she didn't lose control; neither of her alternate personalities came out, and that's what we were really terrified of. If we were any other family, last night's reaction probably would have been the most horrifying sight, but the fact that she was still _Jessica_ through all of it actually makes me think she can be okay again."

"I'm sure she will be, Starr," he reassured her instantly. "Right now, she is going through the single most horrible experience anyone can have, but like you said, if she could remain herself at the worst moment, then she'll be okay. She is your cousin, afterall, and if she's anything like you, she's strong; she'll make it." Starr smiled.

"I think so too."

"So what's happening with Hope now?"

"I'm not sure, that's what I'm trying to figure out. I'd already decided to give Hope up to Marcie when I gave birth, so I think she has legal rights to her; the courts made a quick decision to temporarily place her in Marcie's custody last night. But, I don't know… Jessica has been raising her, and she _loves_ her, I know she does, and she's a wonderful mother; I've seen them, together all the time, and I know that for a fact. As far as I'm concerned, Jessica is as good as her mom, and I think it'd be good for them to stay together, Jessica is who Hope is attached to now.

"But I don't know if Jessica even _wants_ her now, or if Marcie can take the issue to court if _she_ still wants Hope, or what. I should probably be more worried or something, but… all of last night, I got to hold her, and be with her, and it just…it overwhelmed everything else so much. I didn't care about what was going to happen because I had her now, and it was all that mattered, and now, just knowing she's alive and that I can see her, and watch her grow up, I feel that same way. Is that really selfish?"

"No," he said instantly, firmly. "Far from it, and even if it was, you would have every right to be. This is your _daughter_, Starr, and you found out she was _alive._" Just saying it made them both grin like idiots yet again.

"You know, you were the first person I wanted to tell," she confessed softly.

"Really?" he asked, touched. His heart twisted happily over the thought that he'd been the first person she'd wanted to share this joy with.

"Yeah; I talked to you about Hope and how I felt about losing her more than anyone, and it just seemed _right_ for you to be the first to know. I just couldn't think of anyone else I would rather have that moment with. But, I knew it was the right thing for Cole to know first," she sighed, frowning. "But he was too busy, off getting high, to pick up his phone and find out his daughter was alive," she spat angrily. Schuyler gently rubbed circles on her back, and she calmed down. "That's what led to the fight, really."

"_What?_" Schuyler demanded, horrified in his disbelief. How could Cole have twisted what should have been the happiest moment of his life into what Schuyler had seen in the hall? He instinctively clenched his fists again, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah," she sighed. "He reacted like I hoped at first, and I thought, maybe this will be what makes him wake up! But then, he started rambling on about _us_, and how we could be a family now, finally, and put everything else behind us. He thought this somehow automatically meant we were going to get back together, and keep her and raise her, and it was like nothing else, including his drug problem, mattered. When I told him that wasn't the case, that he was still a drug addict, that we were still broken up, that I still knew a couple of high school students couldn't raise a baby and that this didn't change the feelings I had for someone else, that's when he really lost it.

"I'm _so_ mad at him. This should have been one of the happiest days of my life, one that I could always remember with a smile because I knew my little girl was alive and something I wanted that I thought was impossible actually happened, and instead, it's tainted, because I have to remember how upset and scared I was that he was going to do this again, on purpose this time," she said darkly, motioning to her cheek. Schuyler gently brushed her hair back, lightly kissing her bruised skin, and Starr smiled warmly, the tension evaporating from her body. "I still don't want Cole to go to jail or anything. I just want him to get help, so he can finally be happy again, like I am, but if hearing that Hope was alive didn't do it, I just feel like…maybe he's beyond saving," she said sadly.

"If it helps at all, Starr, a lot of people thought that about me too, once, and for good reason."

"You know," she began slowly. "As much as we've talked about it, I still just can't picture you like that, I can't even imagine it."

"I'm glad," Schuyler said instantly. "I know my past is part of who I am and so I shouldn't be ashamed of it, but I don't _ever_ want you to see me the way I was then, even just in your head."

"That bad?"

"That bad."

"Well, you know what? It just makes the man you are now that much more amazing."

Schuyler smiled, his heart lightened by her words, and lightly brushed his lips against hers, inwardly celebrating the fact that they could do this whenever they wanted now.

"You should meet her sometime," Starr suggested quietly, eyes sparkling over the idea. "Hope. Once this is all worked out, of course; I'm sure I could figure out some way."

"I would really love that," he said, tone completely sincere. Starr grinned.

"If she's anything like her mother, then she'll adore you." He chuckled warmly, squeezing her hand. "Hey, Schuyler? I just wanted to tell you I am _so_ sorry about what happened with our babies being switched."

"What? Starr, why are you apologizing for that at all, let alone to me?"

"Because, if your mom hadn't thought that Hope was dead, she might not have-"

"Starr, _no._ Don't you dare feel guilty for that, ever, especially to me. I don't know how that would have changed things, and it's the past, I can't dwell on it, it won't change how things are now. No part of what happened to my mom was your fault, okay?" he told her, hooking a finger and under her chin and tilting her head up to look at him. "Don't blame yourself, that is the last thing I want. If you don't think everything I did made my mother's death my fault, you certainly can't lay any part of the blame on yourself. Okay?"

"Okay," she said softly, leaning up to steal another warm kiss, before leaning further into his embrace and resting against him. Her eyes happened to catch sight of the clock and she gasped. "Oh my God, I had no idea it was that late!"

"Me neither. Do you need a ride home?" he asked reluctantly, not wanting to let her out of his arms, out of his sight.

"No, I told John I was sleeping over at Langston's, and I told Langston to cover for me when I left, nobody's really expecting me anywhere." Starr took a deep breath as she nervously combed her fingers through her hair, hesitating to say what she really wanted to. "I…I don't really want to go home tonight," she confessed quietly.

Schuyler's heart leapt into his throat at her words; he knew he should encourage her to go, his head told him to, but his heart wanted nothing more than to tell her she never had to leave, ever, to stay with him as long as she wanted to- ideally forever.

"Maybe you don't have to."

Starr looked up at him in surprise, slowly beginning to smile.

"I can stay here?" she asked hopefully.

"I want you here if you want to be here," he told her, giving into his heart completely.

Starr suddenly propelled herself at him, knocking them both backwards onto the couch. They both laughed for a moment before Starr kissed him passionately, digging her fingers into his shirt as he grasped her hips, all too happy to respond in kind.

"I want to be here," she said simply when she pulled away.

Schuyler just grinned, and Starr gently laid down against him, nestling against his shoulder peacefully as she began to tell him every last detail of the moment she'd been reunited with Hope.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Hours later, in the middle of the night, Starr gently stirred from her sleep, slowly blinking and raising her head to glance around the darkened room in confusion, until the strong arms around her and solid body beneath her reminded her of where she was. She must have fallen asleep right on top of the poor guy at some point; Schuyler was still snoozing away peacefully, and a smile of utter contentment graced Starr's lips.

If she weren't so happy, the fact that she felt so content here would freak her out. He was her teacher, and even though they'd decided that what they had was worth fighting for, that didn't erase the fact that it would be exactly that, a fight. Nobody, not even Starr's best friend, could know about them; this was just about the only place they could ever truly be together the way they wanted to. They would both have to constantly watch themselves at school, making sure they didn't seem too casual, that they weren't seen alone together after the kiss incident. Unless he pleasantly surprised her, Cole was probably going to do everything possible to try and destroy this.

But…she didn't even care. She felt happy here; she felt safe here, for the first time in forever. Schuyler understood her in a way nobody else ever had or would. Being with him was effortless, like breathing, but just like breathing, she was certain now she needed him to survive; the way she had crumpled to pieces after he'd pushed her away was proof of that. He made her happy, he kept her safe, he just got her, and she needed him, but more importantly, she _wanted_ him; she wanted _this._

She'd been wrong before; she said she didn't want to go home, but right now, _this_ felt like home, and there was nowhere else she wanted to be.

With that happy thought running playing through her mind, Starr settled down against Schuyler once again, resting her head on his chest, and shut her eyes. Even in his sleep, she felt him unconsciously tighten his arm around her securely, and Starr's smile only grew as she drifted off to the first peaceful night of rest she'd had in ages.


	4. Chapter 4

Since we've never actually seen for sure if the rooms at the ASM have kitchens or not, let's just say they do!

**Chapter 4**

Starr sighed in relief as she shut her history book, finally done with the assignment, and instantly grabbed her phone to call Schuyler, hoping he was done at the rehab center by now. She'd yet to talk to him today, and since they seemed to be either with each other or on the _phone_ with each other 24/7 these days, she was already starting to feel like she was going through withdrawal pains.

Starr hit the third button on her keypad and hit dial, waiting patiently as it rang a few times until she heard him pick up.

"Hey, Schuyler!" she greeted happily. "Hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Yeah, hate to disappoint, but _Schuyler_ isn't here right now." Starr gasped, her stomach dropping as she heard the voice of someone she hadn't seen in two weeks.

"Cole?" she demanded in shock, before quickly realizing she needed to cover. "Um, I'm sorry, I must have… called the wrong number."

"No, you're good, you dialed your boyfriend."

"What are you doing with his phone?" she blurted out, swallowing roughly. Oh, crap, this had the potential to be so bad.

"Guess who I got counseling from today?" he asked in a bright, sarcastic tone. Starr mentally groaned; of course, Cole was staying at the same place Schuyler volunteered. He'd counseled him? Great, she was sure that had gone over _so_ well. "What the hell were _you_ doing _calling_ his phone?"

"Um, I, uh, I had to ask a question about our bio assignment," she finally managed, way too late for it to sound convincing.

"I'm sure."

"Cole, what's going on?" she asked anxiously, still lost.

"Obviously way more than that lying creep, Joplin, is telling anyone," Cole spat.

Starr stammered nervously as she swallowed the urge to defend her boyfriend, not knowing what would be the safest way to reply, and in a panic, went for what seemed to be the safest course of action- hanging up on him.

"Oh, god," Starr moaned, dropping the phone to her desk and digging her fingers into her hair as the full weight of the situation hit her. "Not good, _so_ not good."

Okay, now she didn't just _want_ to see Schuyler, she needed to. Starr got over to Schuyler's in record time and quickly let herself in; he'd given her a key about a week ago, both figuring it wouldn't exactly be good for Starr to just wait around in the hall where anyone could see her if she ever got there before him some day.

"Schuyler?" she called, kicking the door shut behind her. There was no response, and she sighed; not home yet.

Starr sat down onto the couch to wait for him, smiling slightly as she relaxed; she loved that this place felt more like home to her now than anywhere else. She'd spent as much time as possible here in the last two weeks, and it just felt comforting here now.

It was funny, really. She was a seventeen year old secretly dating her teacher, which drew to mind images of a lot of hot make-out sessions (not that there _weren't_ those too. Because there were- oh, there were.), but it was far from being just that; she and Schuyler were practically living in domestic bliss here. If you didn't know better, you very well might mistake them for newlyweds. He was even trying to teach her to cook, although thankfully, he was quickly learning it was safest to just assign her to chopping and stirring duty.

Incidentally, the fact that she practically lived here also worked out quite well for her safety, because Jack was missing Todd more and more and getting angrier and angrier, and since he blamed her for his father's absence, Starr was quite certain her brother was plotting to kill her at any moment.

Sometimes when you wanted something, you built it up in your mind so much that when you actually got it, it was never as good as you hoped it would be, but that had so, _so_ not been the case with this relationship. Being with Schuyler had only exceeded every hope she had.

She had _everything_ she wanted now, which still felt hard to believe some days. Jessica had decided that even if Hope (which she had officially changed her name to, she said both out of respect to her biological mother, and because it seemed fitting) wasn't hers by blood, she loved her all the same and still felt like her mother, and in turn, Marcie had decided she didn't want to come between that. Hope had been allowed to stay with Jessica, and Jessica was more than happy to let Starr see her whenever she wanted, in addition to her scheduled weekly visit.

Nobody ever monitored them or asked what she did with Hope during their time together, figuring they needed their time alone together, so Starr had been able to take her daughter to meet Schuyler, and she was seriously convinced her heart must have grown about three sizes that day in order to contain all the joy she was feeling. Just as she'd predicted, Hope had seemed completely infatuated with him right from the start, cooing happily every time he smiled at her, and Schuyler had obviously been enamored, adoring her right from the first hair yank.

"Schuyler!"

Starr was suddenly drawn from her happy thoughts by a loud shout from outside the door, and her eyes widened as she recognized Stacy's voice. Uh-oh; had Schuyler ever gotten his key back from her? Just in case, Starr quickly darted to the closet, stepping inside.

"Schuyler, come on! Look, you know me, you know me better than _anyone_, just like I know you better than anyone!"

Starr snorted, rolling her eyes as she crossed her arms; yeah, right, she didn't think so. The uncharacteristically mean thought crossed her mind that the fact that he'd once loved Stacy was the greatest proof that Schuyler had been truly messed up on drugs.

"You know this isn't me! I was just going through some stuff and snapped, I never really would have done anything to hurt my nephew! Just give me another chance, okay?!"

Starr shook her head, wishing she could turn off her hearing as Stacy spent a good five minutes obnoxiously pounding on the door and whining until she finally gave up and left. She exited the closet, wandering into the kitchen and looking through the familiar cabinets listlessly until a few minutes later, when she heard the door swing open and shut.

"Schuyler!" she instantly called, rushing out to see him.

Schuyler briefly looked surprised, then grinned as brightly as he always did when he saw her, probably expecting her usual greeting of jumping into his arms and happily kissing him. Today, however, she just rushed over and clutched his arm in a death grip, nothing happy about her.

"Oh my God, Schuyler, why did Cole answer your phone?!" she shrieked in greeting; Schuyler's face instantly dropped as he understood.

"Oh, no; he picked up?" he asked grimly. "I saw that you called, but I figured he just let it ring."

"Nope," she sighed. "He picked up; I told him I was calling about an assignment, but I don't think he bought it, and he was _not_ happy. He said you counseled him today? Did you guys get into a fight or something?"

"Okay, hold on, I'll explain everything in a sec. Have you eaten yet?" She shook her head. "Come on, I'll tell you while we make dinner." He started to lead the way only to suddenly stop in his tracks as he turned around, chuckling slightly. "Hi, by the way."

"Oh, right, hi," she laughed as he swooped down to kiss her, winding her arms around his shoulders. "By the way," she began a minute later as they walked to the small kitchen area. "Stacy came by while you were gone and spent five minutes banging on the door and begging you to hear her out. I honestly thought she was going to just kick it down at one point."

"I really wish that came as a surprise," he sighed, fishing his phone out of his pocket, drawing up the call log, and showing her six calls from Stacy in one hour. "I think I'm reprogramming her name in my phone to Glenn Close. Oh, please tell me you get that," he added as he pulled out the necessary ingredients. "You weren't even alive when that came out, were you?"

"Yes, I get it, Fatal Attraction, you're hilarious. Now, what happened today?"

"So, I was just told which room to go to today, they didn't mention the name of who I'd be speaking to," Schuyler began once they were situated, and Starr was carefully chopping a stalk of celery, trying to avoid any of her fingers in the process. "I open the door, and it's Cole. I immediately started to leave, find him someone else, but he just had this attitude about him that was exactly like the one I used to have, like all the other kids I've talked to had, and I just started talking before I could help myself."

"How is he doing?" she asked softly, his voice on the phone having already given her a clue.

"Not good," he sighed. "He's off the drugs, they've gotten it all out of his system, but he hasn't even started to handle this on an emotional level. He still doesn't think he has a problem, and if he were to leave now, I know he would be popping pills again in two days flat."

"And so I'm guessing he wasn't receptive to anything you had to say,' Starr said wryly.

"Yeah, to say the least. He came within two inches of punching me, so I guess that means he didn't take any of it to heart."

"Oh, _Cole_," she groaned, looking to her boyfriend with worried eyes. "You're okay, right?"

"I'm fine. Anyway, I just lost my patience and stormed out, and I forgot my phone. I'm sorry."

"Hey, me too. Is that why you got home later than usual?" she asked curiously. "You had to go back for your phone?" Schuyler briefly hesitated.

"The school called to tell me Cole comes back to school tomorrow," he told her after a beat. Starr paused for a moment, then resumed chopping. "How do you feel about that?" he asked worriedly, hating the thought of Starr being scared to see him after what he'd done two weeks ago. If it seemed like she was, he was going to find some way to shadow Cole's every step at school and make sure he couldn't go near her, he didn't care what it took.

"It's been a couple of weeks," she said tightly, shrugging. "And I'm sure they wouldn't let him leave if he hadn't made _some_ progress, so I'm fine. I'm not going to be Cole's BFF or anything anytime soon, but I'll be fine seeing him."

"He, uh…asked to transfer into my class," he finally dropped the real bomb. "That's why they called me specifically."

"What?!" Starr shouted, whipping around, her hands flailing in the process. Schuyler flinched and quickly pried the knife away from her before continuing.

"Yeah; he claimed he has a great love of science and doesn't find his own class interesting enough anymore."

"Are you kidding me?! Cole _hates_ science! He practically sleeps through his class, and he always got bored when I talked about it. He's doing this because of us," she sighed angrily, rubbing her temples as she hopped up to sit on the edge of the counter. "I bet you anything he made that decision after he picked up when I called, and he's just trying to mess with us, catch us or something. I'm so sorry, Schuyler."

"Starr, please, don't apologize. This is my fault for hanging around to talk to him instead of just leaving, and most of all, for leaving my phone."

"…that _was_ pretty stupid," she muttered, though her eyes twinkled playfully and her lips twitched as fought a smile. Schuyler gaped, his jaw dropping.

"Excuse me, I think you're supposed to reassure me back!"

"Schuyler, do you _want_ us to have a relationship built on lies?"

Shaking his head as he grinned, Schuyler started to move towards her, but she quickly scooted backwards, holding her hands up defensively as she laughed.

"Don't you dare! If we get a repeat of that tickling incident, I swear I'm going to hit you this time, no more of that just begging you to stop."

Schuyler laughed and just stood between her legs, resting his hands on her knees, rubbing small circles with his thumb.

"We'll handle this together, okay?" he asked softly. She nodded, giving him a small smile.

"Okay."

Schuyler lightly brushed his lips to hers, and couldn't help chuckling slightly a moment later. Starr pulled back, raising an eyebrow.

"Just what, may I ask, is so funny?"

"I didn't have to swoop down or lift you up for once." Starr scoffed.

"Look, we are not gonna get into this again; I'm not short, you're tall."

"Don't worry," he reassured her, kissing her warmly once more before grinning and quickly backing away. "I wouldn't have you any other way, short stuff."

"Okay, give me back the knife, you're dead."

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
The next day at school, Starr was anxiously tapping her pencil as she waited for Schuyler's class to begin, masterfully avoiding so much as glancing at him; they'd both gotten quite good at this in the last two weeks. Markko and Langston were chattering on, but Starr realized with a pang of guilt she hadn't heard a word either had said in the last ten minutes, too nervous about what she was waiting for.

A minute before class began, she heard footsteps behind her, and seeing that everyone else was in class already, Starr took a deep breath, knowing it was him.

"Welcome to class, Mr. Thornhart," Schuyler greeted him with a friendly smile, nodding to the desk set up for Cole with the books he needed. "Glad to have you joining us."

Cole took his seat; by the look on his face, you'd think Schuyler had just told him to go to hell instead of welcoming him.

"Cole?" Langston and Markko asked in unison, shooting each other a startled look.

"What are you doing here?" Starr asked, feigning surprise.

"What, scared I'll interrupt your time with your boyfriend?" Oh, spectacular; they'd detoxed him off the drugs, but they'd yet to extract the jerk from him. Having him back was going to be really pleasant.

"I won't even acknowledge that. And Cole, you hate biology, why would you wanna be in the AP class? You're just gonna flunk out," she snapped, irritation making her lose her cool and forget her attempt to be friendly.

"Wow, thanks for the encouragement."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that," she sighed; she really hadn't. "You're _smart_, Cole, you are, and you're capable, but you don't even enjoy science. Why would you want to be in this class?"

"Let's just say I've gained a new perspective. I'm eager to learn."

Schuyler called the class to order, starting the lesson, and Starr tried to focus, pretending she couldn't feel Cole's eyes on her. He watched her and Schuyler like a hawk all period, which made Starr roll her eyes; what did he think was going to happen during class hours to incriminate them? She was going to get a B on a test and leap out of her seat, screaming 'No more sexual favors for you!'?

When class was finally over, Starr emitted a quiet sigh of relief; normally she loved Schuyler's class, but that had just been uncomfortable.

"Hey, Starr, we're gonna go get some lunch, want to come?" Langston asked.

"Sure," she said instantly; she'd been a little distracted with Hope and Schuyler lately, she could use some time with her friends.

"What about you?" Markko asked Cole. "You have to get back to the center, or can you come?"

"I've got a couple more hours before I have to get back to jail."

Starr stared at him in disbelief; jail? That was honestly how he saw it? Schuyler was exactly right; he was never going to get better with that attitude.

With her enthusiasm effectively shot, Starr followed the trio and a few other students they were friendly with out of the classroom (as the last out of the room, Starr turned and shot Schuyler a quick, dramatic look of terror, and was rewarded with his quiet laugh) and down to the café. The other asked Cole a few questions about how he was liking his program, and his answers all just depressed Starr further; he wasn't even trying to hear his counselors out, he was just wasting time while waiting to be released.

"Guess who I had a session with yesterday?"

"Who?" Adriana, one of the other girls at the table, asked.

"Mr. Joplin."

"Oh, I didn't know he volunteered there!" Starr let out a breath of relief that she and the others didn't seem to wonder why, and shot Cole a pleading look; they didn't need to know about Schuyler's past with drugs, that was his business. He stared back at her evenly. "So, you got him all to yourself for an hour? Color me jealous."

Starr glanced to the other girl in surprise, her shoulders stiffening as she clenched her fork tighter; Cole instantly picked up on that and smirked.

"You too, Starr?" he asked, attempting to look innocent. Starr fought to relax her features; well, at least he wasn't telling them about Schuyler's past addiction.

"What?" she asked in surprise.

"Cole's right. I mean, you are the one who kissed him," Adriana teased. Starr rolled her eyes.

"Haha. I _told_ you guys, I was just going through a bad time and acting out; I'm really embarrassed about that now, especially since Mr. J so isn't even my type. If I had to act out by being stupid and throwing myself at a teacher, you'd think I'd at least pick one I find hot," she sighed playfully, trying not to smirk at Cole as Allison looked appeased.

"I wish I had thought of that excuse to throw myself at him," she joked, laughing. "Although, today's assignment is making me rethink that. I have no idea what #7 is, not even close!"

She changed the subject to school, which Cole looked upset about; apparently, he wasn't done torturing her yet, Starr thought, fuming.

After an hour passed, Cole had to go, and Starr sighed; finally. She hated that she constantly felt so _tense_ when he was around now.

"Hey, Starr, can I talk to you alone for a second?"

"Do you have to?" she asked irritably. He'd made several more smart remarks about Schuyler all throughout lunch, giving her an obnoxious smirk each time, and it had quickly worn out her patience for him.

"Starr," Langston hissed in surprise, nudging her. "Quit being mean!"

Starr gave up and slid out of the booth, following him a few feet away.

"What?"

"I, just, ah…" he began slowly, a surprising look of vulnerability beginning to creep into his eyes. "Wanted to ask how Hope is."

"Oh," she said quietly, softening. She gave Cole a hesitant smile. "She's good, she's really good."

"So, has your boyfriend met our daughter yet?" he asked tightly. Starr narrowed her eyes, feeling a rush of anger twist in her stomach.

"Are you _kidding_ me?" she snapped. He said nothing. "You know what, Cole? If you put even a fraction as much energy into getting better as you do into hating Mr. J, you'd be able to see your daughter and know how she is for yourself."

Having said everything that needed to be said, Starr simply spun on her heel and stormed out of the café.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
Four more days passed, and Cole continued to do everything in his power to try and destroy Schuyler on each one. There had been about four different incidents where Starr had all but tackled him to keep him from telling other students about Schuyler's history with drugs, and he was _constantly_ making snide, pointed remarks about their relationship, trying desperately to make them slip up and reveal something.

As yet another hellish period ended, Cole got up and walked to Schuyler's desk as soon as the bell rang, and Starr frowned, putting her things away as slowly as possible so she could listen in.

"What can I do for you, Cole?" he asked kindly; unlike her, Schuyler never seemed to run out of patience for Cole, no matter how big a jerk he was to him.

"Well, since I've been struggling to catch up on the work, I spoke with my mom, and we both think it'd be a good idea if I got a tutor."

"That's a smart idea," Schuyler agreed, grabbing a stack of papers on his desk and thumbing through, trying to find the list of student volunteers for this class. "Let's see…

"How about Starr?" Cole suggested, a smirk slowly crawling across his features; he was obviously trying to get a response from the older man.

"I don't even know if Starr is offering her services," he replied smoothly, not giving Cole what he wanted, though internally he was thinking 'No chance in hell.'

"I saw her name on the tutor sign up sheet for this class up at the front office."

Schuyler kept his head down, desperately trying to think fast; he wasn't putting Starr in that situation, he didn't care what he had to do or say.

"You wouldn't have a problem with Starr tutoring me for some reason, would you, Mr. J?"

"Cole, I don't _want_ to tutor you, okay?" Starr snapped, saving Schuyler. Cole looked genuinely started as he turned to face her.

"What? Why?"

"Because I'm not comfortable being alone with you after what happened before you went to rehab!" Starr told him in disbelief. How could he even ask? Cole paled, the smirk disappearing.

"What? Starr, I told you I was sorry for that, I didn't mean it! I just got upset. I would never hurt you, ever."

"Okay, well, after what you did, I don't trust that anymore. You scared me, and I don't want to be alone with you, so just let James or someone tutor you, okay?"

"Just forget it," he snapped defensively, yanking his backpack off the floor before turning to Schuyler with an angry glare. "This is your fault," he muttered before storming out. Starr groaned in frustration; how could he believe that?

"Sorry about that, Mr. Joplin," she said softly, giving him a meaningful look. He smiled, shaking his head.

"Nothing to apologize for, Miss. Manning."

"I'll see you tomorrow." Of course, for them, that actually meant tonight.

"See you then."

Starr finished gathering her things and walked out, stiffening when she saw Cole waiting down the hall in the direction she needed to go. Her posture defensive, she started to breeze past him, but he quickly fell into step with her.

"Hey, Starr, I just have a quick question. Did the school ever notify your parents about what happened at the dance? Because I think this is the sort of thing parents should know about, it just seems responsible, and after all, they're teaching me all about responsibility in rehab. I've just been thinking, it'd be really interesting if your dad found out about this, wouldn't it?"

With a strangled sigh, Starr suddenly stopped walking and whipped around, and Cole was startled to find her eyes burning with tears.

"Cole! What is wrong with you?!" she shouted furiously. "Why do you not want me to be happy?! Why would you try to ruin that?!"

"Happy?" he repeated blankly, his face slowly falling. "Wait, you're…happy with him?" he choked out, the same hint of vulnerability from the day at the café returning.

"I'm not with him, I've told you that," she replied smoothly, having gotten rather good at this. "He's my teacher. But _you_ think I am, and you're doing everything in your power to ruin that; if I _were_ with Schuyler, it would have to be because he makes me happy, wouldn't it? And yet you keep trying to destroy his career, his life. If you ever really cared about me, wouldn't you accept my happiness? Because y'know what, Cole? I wish for you to be happy every single day," she informed him, truly meaning that. "And even if it would be a little weird for me at first to see you with someone else, I would never try to ruin your happiness, _ever_."

Cole was quiet for a long time, and he bowed his head, pacing a few steps as Starr nervously waited for his reaction.

"I didn't think you were happy with him," he muttered.

"I'm not with him," she said again, automatically.

"Sure you're not," he snorted dismissively, rolling his eyes, before growing serious again. "I don't know, I just kind of thought you were just trying to get back at me."

"I would never do that, Cole, with anyone. Not everything is about you."

There was more silence as he processed this.

"Look, Starr," he began slowly, spitting out the words as if they were causing him physical pain. "Of course I want you to be happy. If you are, then okay; I'm not gonna try and ruin Joplin anymore, I'll leave it alone. But it doesn't erase the fact that I want you to be happy with _me_. So I'm not gonna try and destroy this guy or whatever the hell it is you have with him if it upsets you so much, but it sure as hell doesn't mean I'm giving up either."

Starr slowly smiled; that would do, for now. This was the first time in ages she'd gotten a pleasant surprise from him.

"Thank you, Cole."

"Whatever," he muttered defensively. "I've gotta go drop this class before I get back to the center."

"Thought you had a new perspective," she couldn't resist teasing gently. He rolled his eyes.

"It's science, it's boring; there is no new perspective."

Starr held back a laugh as he walked away, doing the same herself; she couldn't wait to get back to the guy who understand how wrong that statement was- the guy who understood everything about her, really.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
Later that night, Schuyler had just finished grading homework from his students when he heard a knock at his door; she had perfect timing.

Schuyler quickly walked to the door and opened it with a smile, only to have his face suddenly fall as he saw that the girl on the other side was not the one he'd been hoping for.

"Stacy," he sighed. "What are you doing here? I told you-"

"I know!" she interrupted, her lip trembling as a few tears spilled over. She rubbed her eyes, then winced; they were still puffy and bruised, and painful to the touch from the beating Gigi had delivered once the truth came out. "But I just need you to hear me out!"

"Stacy, there's nothing to hear; there is nothing you could say to me that could ever explain what you tried to do. I knew damn well that you were no saint, but even I didn't think you could ever do something _this_ horrendous."

"I wasn't thinking, Schuyler! I had just been so lonely for so long, and I was so desperate to-"

"Stacy, stop it," he snapped. "I know you too well to buy the tears and excuses. You do this every time you don't get what you want, but you need to grow up and learn how to deal with your mistakes."

"Exactly, you know me! I…I feel like you're the only one who ever has," she whispered dramatically. "You're the only person I was ever really myself with, and when I lost you, I lost myself too, it's how I wound up like this. This whole mess made me realize that. I think if I had you again, though, I could find myself, and I could become a person I actually like again."

"You and I are never going to happen again, Stacy, for a thousand different reasons."

"Why not?! You loved me once!"

"Yeah, once, not now, and to be honest, I don't know if I even really loved you then, because you're not the person I thought you were. I have moved on, I'm with someone else, and I'm happy with her."

"_We_ were happy, Schuyler! We could be again! Just…give me one more chance!"

Before Schuyler could tell her again that it wasn't happening, Stacy suddenly lunged forward and threw herself at him, planting her lips on his. Schuyler stumbled back, momentarily freezing in surprise, but quickly snapped out of it and seized her by the shoulders, pushing her back.

"Stacy! I don't know how else to make you understand this! You and I are long over, and that's that. I don't want you back, I don't want to hear your excuses, I don't even want to be your friend. Yeah, a part of me is always going to care about you because of our past, but I've realized it's exactly that- the _past_- and you need to as well. Don't call me anymore, don't come over. If you're really sorry, you need to just be alone and work on yourself. Okay?"

"But-"

Schuyler gently guided her out the door and then slammed it shut, letting out a great breath. Right now, he really and truly couldn't believe he'd ever loved Stacey, ever thought they were going to be something that lasted. What he'd had with her just seemed laughable compared to what he had now with Starr.

Speaking of, Schuyler flopped down on his couch to read a book while he waited for said girl. He glanced at the clock, noting that she was usually here by now.

Thirty minutes later, Schuyler was getting worried and just about to call her, when he heard a key in the lock and mentally groaned; duh, why hadn't he realized it wasn't Starr earlier when she hadn't let herself in? Ah, well, nothing he could do about it now.

Starr stepped in, her behavior a little more somber than usual, and Schuyler felt a rush of concern, hoping Cole hadn't done anything.

"Starr, you okay?" he asked instantly, quickly walking over to greet her. She tilted her head, looking confused.

"What? Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"You just seem kind of upset. Cole didn't do anything, right?"

"No, no; actually, just the opposite, he agreed to back off."

"Seriously?" he asked in surprise, raising his eyebrows. She smiled, nodding. "Huh, well, what do you know?"

"And he's transferring back out of your class."

"Oh, thank God," he groaned before he could catch himself. Starr laughed slightly. "You sure you're good?"

"I'm great," she confirmed with a smile, rising up on her toes to kiss him. Schuyler held the back of her head, returning it with fervor.

"Okay, so I have something to tell you about," he began once he let her go, wanting to get it out of the way as soon as possible. "Uh, not a big deal, just something I thought you should know, because it's important to be honest; don't want a relationship based on lies," he chuckled slightly, remembering her joke from earlier in the week. "Okay, so, ah…Stacy came over. Because I'm an idiot I wound up opening the door, and basically, she-"

"I saw," Starr interrupted gently.

"You saw?" he repeated in surprise. She nodded.

"Yeah. I guess that's why I was a little weird when I first came in. I saw and uh, that's why I was a little later than usual today- I left, figured I should give you time to deal with it."

"So you saw…?" he asked leadingly. She nodded, and Schuyler felt a small surge of panic. "Starr, I swear, I did not kiss her! She kissed me, completely threw me off because that was the last thing I was expecting- again, dumb, should have been the first- but I pushed her away. I haven't wanted Stacy in years- _you_ are the only one I want, and I would never do that to you, I would never do anything to hurt you. Stacy just-"

"Schuyler!" Starr interrupted, _laughing_. "Breathe. I _know._"

"What?" he asked slowly, surprised.

"I _know_ that you would never do that to me, especially with her. I wasn't worried. What you said is pretty much what I already figured must have happened."

Schuyler slowly smiled; well, this was a change. Back when he was with Stacy, she had a coronary if another girl so much as came within ten feet of him. If she had seen an ex-girlfriend begging him to take her back, and kissing him? Forget it, they both would have been dead.

But, of course, he reminded himself with a grin, Starr wasn't Stacy, which was kind of the whole point. Wordlessly, Schuyler just took her into his arms and kissed her passionately, leaving them both breathless.

"You're amazing, you know that?" Schuyler asked, pulling away just enough to look her in the eyes.

"Oh, yeah, I totally know," she replied playfully, grinning. "I'd have to be pretty amazing to get you, after-all." He shook his head.

"It's the other way around."

"Maybe we're both just lucky," she suggested. Schuyler smiled, cupping her cheek as he kissed her warmly once more.

"That must be it."


	5. Chapter 5

The living situation on this show has confused me yet again Starr and her family are living with Dorian and Langston currently, right? That's where I have her right now. I know in the third chapter, I made it sound like Starr was living somewhere other than with Langston, but, uh, that was a mistake, let's all pretend it didn't happen

**Chapter 5**

Starr's cell phone buzzed with the alert of a new text message, and with an exasperated groan, Starr glanced at the screen; from Langston, big surprise. She read the message, alerting her yet again to Cole's offer to escort her to prom, and groaned; she didn't know who was more persistent, her ex or her best friend.

"You okay?"

Starr glanced over at Schuyler in the kitchen and forced a smile that didn't convince him for a second.

"Yeah; why?

"You just seem a little edgy today- why?"

Starr hesitated for a moment, having a feeling she wouldn't like his reaction to this, but continued after a moment.

"I'm nervous about prom," she told him, sighing. "And everybody is talking about it lately, today in particular, so it's on my mind. If I could just skip it, I would, but Langston would freak."

"Even if she wouldn't, you shouldn't skip it," Schuyler said instantly, something that looked way too much like guilt flashing in his eyes. "I will admit that prom is rarely what people make it out to be, but it's still an important experience. For better or worse you remember it forever, and you'd regret it if you didn't go. Why don't you want to?" he questioned, his head bowing slightly, sounding as if he already knew the answer.

"Not because of you, Schuyler," she said instantly, knowing him all too well; she wanted to stop that line of thinking before it went too far. "So please, don't be all 'Oh, no, she should have a normal high school boyfriend she can go to dances with, I'm robbing her of a normal life', blah blah blah, okay? I'm not letting you push me away again, I am holding on for dear life, so don't even bother with that, over prom, of all issues. Got it?"

"Got it," he replied softly, forcing those kinds of thoughts from his mind. As he reminded himself on a regular basis, if he had any ounce of respect for Starr, he should certainly respect the fact that she had chosen him. "Then what is the reason?"

"Cole," she admitted, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I would have no problem just going solo and hanging with Langston and Markko, but I don't think he's going to let that happen without a fight. Our big shining moment as a couple occurred at prom, and I think he's expecting it to happen again and for us to get back together there; unfortunately, that fantasy," she stressed the word, glancing at him to make sure he got it.

Schuyler smiled and nodded; he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was the only one Starr wanted. They had to fight too hard to be together, and with Hope being alive and Cole getting better, there was no reason for her to still be fighting if he wasn't.

"is only being fueled on by Langston. She keeps pushing Cole on me like crazy, and going on and on about how we belong together and it's gonna happen eventually so I should just stop fighting, and it drives me insane. Oh, by the way, as she's told me a thousand times, it turns out I've just become infatuated with you to deal with my pining for Cole, try not to be too heartbroken over that fact," Starr deadpanned, rolling her eyes.

Schuyler laughed; though he'd yet to succeed in erasing his doubts about whether or not he was good for Starr, he had at least gotten to the point where he'd realized the idea of Starr still wanting Cole was funny.

"I know she's just trying to help, but it's made things much worse for me, and I think he's just gonna bug me all night. To be honest, I wish we lived in some perfect universe where I could just go with you," she sighed. Schuyler smiled sadly; so did he.

"Hey, I am going to be there, at least, as a chaperone," he offered, shrugging.

"Really?" Starr asked in surprise.

"I didn't think they'd want me there after last time either," he said, accurately guessing what she was thinking, as usual. "But nobody else wanted the job; apparently, having me there is just another form of punishment."

"I'm sorry," Starr said sheepishly, knowing he was only receiving punishment because of her.

"Don't be," he assured her warmly. "Anyway, I just brought it up because if Cole does try to bother you, I'll step in, believe me."

"Mr. J," she gasped, feigning shock. "Are you saying you'd abuse your chaperoning powers?" He just winked and she giggled.

"You know, Starr…" Schuyler began slowly a moment later as he considered something, hating what he was about to say. "Maybe you should go with a date."

"What?" Her eyes were wide, startled. "You want me to go with some other guy?" she asked in alarm.

"No!" Schuyler replied instantly, his voice firm. "No, no, hell no I don't want you to. I cannot begin to tell you how much I don't want you to." She grinned, relieved. "I just think it might be…smart," he sighed. "It would take attention and suspicion off of us, and it might convince Cole to stay away."

"True," she admittedly quietly, dropping her eyes to the floor as she licked her lips. "But I don't know, I just…feel weird about being there with some other guy, especially in front of you. I mean, if the situations were reversed, even if it was fake, it would kill me to see you with some other girl. And besides, if this is supposed to be some big rite of passage that I'll remember forever, I don't know if I want to remember that I was there with some fake date, using some poor guy all the while wishing I could just make out with the chaperone in a broom closet. Oh, God, I'm not even going to be able to just hang around you like at the last dance, am I?" she realized before groaning loudly, burying her head in her hands. "God, I'm an idiot; I wish I had never kissed you."

"Uh, can't say I wish the same."

"No, I didn't mean it like that," she laughed, quickly walking over and kissing him to prove her point. "Of course I don't wish I hadn't kissed you, considering your cowardly self wasn't ever going to make a move," she teased, nudging his shoulder with her own. "I just kind of wish I hadn't kissed you in the middle of the school while VP Dickinson and every other member of the student body was just feet away; not one of my brighter moments. At least then I could actually talk to you at this stupid dance without you, like, getting arrested."

"I still think it was a fair trade off," he murmured, running his hand through her hair before capturing her lips once more. Starr sank into his kiss, her knees feeling like jelly.

"Well, you've convinced me," Starr said in a dazed tone with a slight giggle as they parted, before growing serious.

"I'll go, but I'm not going to go with a date," she decided. Schuyler couldn't control the twinge of relief he felt, despite it being his own idea. "It wouldn't be fair to whoever I would go with, and I just wouldn't have any fun."

"You sure? I don't want you to think that you-"

"My decision has nothing to do with you," she cut him off. "I seriously don't care about being alone at the dance; knowing I'm not going to be alone after it is more than enough for me, that's all I want, end of story. I l…"

Starr quickly caught herself and swallowed roughly, unable to believe how close she'd come to blurting out those three words; that was like, the fifth time she'd done that in a few days. It shouldn't really be surprising, she felt that way around him all the time, but the thought of saying it when she had no idea how he would react freaked her out.

"I'll have more fun without a date," she quickly saved herself, changing the subject in a hurry. "Now," she began leadingly. "I think I might be having a change of heart over the trade off being worth it, I think I need more convincing, if you're up for it."

Schuyler grinned suggestively, grasping her hips and pulling her body tight to his as he kissed her sensually, pressing her against the counter, and Starr emitted a quiet moan of pleasure, fisting the back of his shirt and pulling her self somehow even closer to him, before he pulled back for the briefest of moments to speak.

"It'd be my pleasure."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Oh, Starr! You look so beautiful!"

Starr smiled as she descended the stairs at Dorian's a few days later, on the night of prom, having just finished her hair and make-up.

"Thanks, mom," Starr said, smiling warmly as she saw her mother's watery eyes.

Dorian and Blair gushed over the girls for several minutes, the teen girls exchanging amused looks as they were forced to pose for what seemed like an endless amount of pictures, before they were finally ushered out the door and to the limo, tossing their bags for the sleepover they were attending after the dance in the back.

"See, this is going to be so much fun, Starr! Aren't you glad you agreed to come?" Langston gushed on, oblivious to her friend's lack of enthusiasm. "You would have regretted it so much if you didn't come. I'm so glad you got so into it- I never expected you to want to leave early! I still don't see why you wouldn't go with Cole, though," she sighed. "I mean, just look at how the last prom turned out. You guys are obviously meant for each other, everyone can see it! Just think, wouldn't it be romantic if you worked things out at prom?"

As Langston continued to ramble on about Starr and Cole and the magic of prom or something, Starr tuned her out; she used to feel guilty about ignoring her best friend, but she'd quickly realized it was the only possible way to preserve her own sanity when Langston went into one of her rambling sessions about Cole.

She was given a break when they picked Markko up and the boy took over Langston's attention, allowing her to spend the rest of the limo ride in peace. They arrived at school a few minutes later, and Starr quickly ran through her plan once more in her mind before speaking.

"Ready, Starr?" Langston chirped up, quickly doing a scan of the crowd for Cole.

"Yeah!" Starr chirped, pretending to be eager to get inside. She grabbed her clutch, digging inside for a moment, and then feigned surprise. "Oh, no."

"What?" Langston instantly asked with a furrowed brow. Starr gave an exaggerated sigh of disappointment.

"Shoot; Langston, I'm so sorry- I was in such a rush to get going that I forgot my ticket! I'm just going to head back to the house real quick and grab it."

"Oh, well, we'll go with y-"

"NO!" Starr shouted before quickly catching herself. "I mean, there's really no point in that. Go say hi to everyone, I'll be back before you know it."

"You sure?"

"Totally."

"Okay, well, hurry!"

Langston and Markko left to mingle with the other students that had arrived early, and Starr quickly went back home and dashed upstairs to grab the ticket she'd purposely left behind so she'd be covered if Langston mentioned Starr going back home to her mom and Dorian; she was out the door so fast that the two older women barely had time to throw her a bewildered glance and catch her rushed explanation.

Once back in the limo, Starr directed the driver to drop her off a couple of blocks from the Angel Square Motel, and as usual, he did what she what requested, no questions asked- she'd always liked that about him.

As he pulled to a stop, Starr quickly fished her long coat out from under the seats and managed to get most of her dress covered as she slid out of the car, so as to avoid drawing attention to herself. Starr allowed herself a satisfied smile over how well her plan had worked out as she walked to the motel; sneaking around with Schuyler had given her some serious skills.

"Schuyler?" she called as she opened the door, hoping she'd caught him in time.

"Starr?" she heard his surprised voice coming from the back of the room as she shrugged her jacket off, feeling a slight nervous twist in her stomach. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the school?"

"I just wanted to stop by for a minute first, see you in your suit now so everybody in the gym doesn't see my jaw drop like at the spring fling," she called back, her voice playful. "Figured I should let you see the finished product now too."

"Well, I…"

Starr never found out how Schuyler was going to finish that sentence, as he walked into the room at that moment and suddenly froze, his eyes lighting up as he drank in the sight of her. He was silent, appearing dazed, breathless, and Starr averted her eyes bashfully, her heart getting that funny, jumpy feeling it often did around him.

"I'm hoping this is a good silence."

"Better than good," Schuyler finally breathed. "Much, much better than good. You are…wow. Beautiful is such an understatement that it seems insulting. You look amazing, Starr."

Starr felt a furious blush crawl across her cheeks in response to the sincerity of his words and intensity of his gaze.

"Thank you," she replied softly, her face still feeling incredibly hot as she shot him a shy smile. "Not looking too bad yourself; let's just say it was a good thing I came over here first, or else I might have lost self-control and thrown myself at you at the dance."

"And again I have to say that the consequences of that would have been a fair trade," he chuckled, quickly crossing the room to her and embracing her tightly as they kissed. "How did you even get here without Langston or your mom finding out?"

"Oh, I'm super stealthy these days, I think I could, like, pull off a robbery if I needed to. If you're lucky, I just might teach you someday."

"Looking forward to it," he chuckled.

Starr grinned, taking one last look at him and stealing one more kiss, before grabbing her jacket from the back of the couch and shrugging it back on.

"Okay, I know I've been here for like, thirty seconds, but unfortunately, I have to go before Langston starts suspecting something. I'll see you after the dance, though, okay? Meet you here."

"How are you going to…" he trailed off as Starr gave him a pointed look, and he grinned. "Right, you're stealthy. Have fun tonight, okay?"

"Yeah, we'll see," she muttered, walking out the door to pleasant sound of Schuyler's laughter.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

As it turned out, Starr had been a lot more accurate than Schuyler about what the night was going to be like for her. When she arrived at the dance, Langston had already found Cole and given him a seat right next to the one she'd saved for Starr, and from the instant Starr had sat down, she'd been bombarded with reminders about the last prom.

Not even five minutes had passed without one of them bringing up what a perfect couple Starr and Cole had been, remarking on how well rehab had been going for Cole, 'innocently' suggesting Starr and Cole share a dance for 'old times sake'. Markko at least seemed to be on her side and dragged Langston off to the dance floor, shooting her a sympathetic look.

"So, here we are again, huh?" Cole asked with a slight laugh, gesturing around the room.

"Yep," Starr sighed absently, starting to wish she had gone with Schuyler's idea.

"You sure you don't want to dance?"

"Cole, it's sweet of you to offer, I appreciate it, but I really don't think that would be a good idea."

"What wouldn't? Dancing?" he asked with an amused smile.

"Look, I just don't want to give you the wrong idea, okay?" she said gently, deciding to be completely honest. "I know what you said about not giving up, but you and I are not going to happen, Cole- ever. And I just don't want to do anything that might give you hope."

"I'm gonna have hope anyway, Starr," he informed her. She resisted the urge to groan and slam her head to the table. "I know what you said about is being over, but I know that you and I are meant to be, and that you're going to see that eventually. Not dancing with me isn't going to have any effect on what I feel, so really, you might as well."

"Cole," she groaned. "We are not meant to be! You and I were high school, puppy dog, first love, never meant to be more than that! We're not right for each other anymore! If you were honest with yourself, you'd see that too."

"Okay, well then, how about you just dance with me one last time as a sort of…farewell to our relationship?" he suggested, still grinning. Starr emitted another sigh, though she couldn't help feel a twinge of amusement mixed in with the irritation.

"You still don't agree with a word I said, do you?"

"Nope."

"Cole, if I dance with you once, will you please just let this go, at least for tonight, and go ask some other girl to dance?"

"Yes!" he said instantly.

"Okay, then."

Starr reluctantly rose to her feet and he did the same; Cole offered his hand, but Starr hooked her arm through his instead as they walked to the dance floor, deciding it looked friendlier. Once they were out on the floor, Cole instantly moved his hands to her waist, but with a stern look, Starr grabbed one of them in her own hand, moving them to the more formal dance position.

"We are dancing as friends."

"Got it, got it."

As he spun her to the rhythm of the song, Starr caught sight of Schuyler over Cole's shoulder, staring at them with a strange look on his face, and Starr couldn't help smiling slightly as it hit her a second later that the look was jealousy. When she'd thought Schuyler was with Stacy, she had constantly felt an uncomfortable surge of jealousy twisting in her stomach just imagining them together; maybe this wasn't great to admit, but since he was always so calm and collected, she couldn't help enjoying seeing the proof that this affected him the same way.

"See, this isn't so bad," Cole said, misinterpreting her smile.

"No," she admitted. "But we're still never gonna happen."

"Never say never, Starr."

As soon as the song ended, Starr reminded Cole of his promise, and to her pleasant surprise, he simply kissed her hand and walked away to find another girl, just as he'd agreed to. His persistence was still kind of irritating, but now that he was clean, at least he wasn't so…angry and insistent upon it.

"Starr!" Langston squealed, suddenly appearing at her side. "Oh my gosh, I just saw you and Cole- what happened?! I have to go to the bathroom, come with me, tell me everything!"

With an exasperated, quiet laugh, Starr just followed as her friend tugged her along. As they neared Schuyler, Starr fell behind a few steps, shooting him a secretive, warm smile that erased all those hints of jealousy from his eyes.

'The punch is spiked," Starr muttered through her teeth as she quickly passed him, looking straight ahead; neither he nor VP Dickinson seemed to have caught on yet.

"Damn," Schuyler muttered, heading off to deal with it. He was seriously the worst chaperone ever. "How did I miss that?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Once Cole decided to let her be, which led Langston to do the same, the rest of the dance was actually pretty fun, and Starr had to grudgingly admit to herself Schuyler had been right- she probably would have regretted not coming.

To her surprise, at the end of the night when they were all saying goodbye to Cole, Langston did not push, make any suggestive comments, or come up with an excuse to leave them alone together. Starr knew Langston was only doing all of this because she was so concerned about her happiness, and believed Cole was what she wanted, but it got tiring having to dance around the subject all the time.

She wished she could just tell Langston about Schuyler, but their relationship was just so important to Starr that she really didn't think she could handle it if Langston belittled her feelings yet again, insisted they weren't real and this wouldn't last. Starr wished more than anything that she could just make Langston understand; it got a little sad sometimes, not being able to gush to her friend about her boyfriend like all other teenage girls did.

She and Langston arrived at their friend's house shortly after prom and quickly got changed into their sweats, joining the other girls in the kitchen to gossip over various incidents that had happened at prom (Starr was amused by just how much Schuyler had missed) while Adriana made popcorn and various other typical slumber party treats. Starr waited for a sufficient amount of time to pass, until the party was in full swing and she knew Langston would be too distracted to really miss her, and then quickly grabbed her bag, fishing through it with a frustrated look on her face.

"Shoot," she sighed. "Lang, I have been a total scatterbrain today- I forgot my toothbrush and everything I'm gonna need tonight too."

"Want me to call Dorian, see if she'll have someone run them down?" Langston asked absently, already caught up in telling Jamie about how amazing Markko had been to her all night.

"Nah, I'm just gonna run down to the store and buy a couple things, no reason to bother them. I'll be back soon, okay?"

"Okay!" Langston replied, barely even waving as Starr left, grinning to herself.

Starr got to Schuyler's quickly, as Adriana lived within walking distance of the ASM, and let herself in.

"Told you I'd get here," she sang out in greeting.

Schuyler came walking out from the bedroom, laughing.

"I have to give it to you, you really are the queen of stealth," he remarked, walking over and wrapping her in his arms. Starr grinned, cuddling into his embrace. "So, how was it?"

"Not that bad, actually," she admitted. "Once Cole backed off, I actually had fun. How about you?"

"You know, not as horrible as I was expecting; things were surprisingly calm."

"Oh, Schuy," she laughed. "I hate to break this to you, but you only think that because you're kind of the worst chaperone ever and didn't catch half of what happened. On your watch, the punch got spiked, Lisa and Jessica got into a bloody catfight in the hall, and I think a baby might have been conceived in the gym supply closet- and those are just the first things coming to mind."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"I obviously missed the class VP Dickinson offers on how to see out of the back of your head," Schuyler muttered, shaking his head in disbelief. Starr giggled.

"Nobody can be good at everything," she offered consolingly, patting him on the back. He chuckled.

"So, where were you coming from anyway?" he asked curiously, taking in her attire.

"Ah, post prom sleepover," she admitted, plucking at the sweats. "I know, not quite as grand an entrance." Schuyler shook his head, smiling.

"You look just as beautiful now as you did then." Starr blushed happily. "So, are you glad you went?"

"Yes, I have to admit, I am- don't rub it in. It still would have been better if I could have danced with you, though," she said, unable to help her slight wistful sigh.

Schuyler was quiet for a moment, as his eyes flickered to the stereo sitting on the dresser, and then he slowly smiled, extending his hand to her.

"May I have this dance?"

"What?" she asked, giggling.

"I'm serious; dance with me," he requested softly. There went that fluttery feeling in her heart.

"I'd love to," she replied seriously, eyes sparkling.

She took his hand and Schuyler pulled her close to him as he reached out and hit play.

"_With a taste of your lips, I'm on a ride! You're toxic, I'm slipping under!"_

As the loud, thumping beats exploded from the speakers, there were a moment of brief, stunned silence from both of them, before Starr suddenly burst into hysterical laughter, her entire body shaking.

"Britney Spears?!"

"Apparently Stacy left her CDs here," he sighed, shaking his head, raising his voice to be heard over the music.

"A likely story!" Starr choked out, taking a short breath before cracking up again. "Oh my God, it's not even the original, it's a techno club remix!" she shrieked, doubling over.

"Imagine listening to this everytime you're in the car with someone," Schuyler said grimly, recalling wanting to stick a fork in his ears anytime he let Stacy control the stereo.

"Schuyler, there's no shame in it- just admit you bought Nonstop Dance Party 3."

Schuyler quickly ejected the CD, carelessly tossing it across the room to the pile of crap he needed to give Stacy sometime and putting in something more appropriate for the moment, but had to wait several minutes for Starr to regain her breath and wipe the tears of laughter from her eyes.

"That was kind of a moment ruiner, huh?"

"No, no!" Starr said quickly, reaching out and flicking off the overheads, leaving them in the dim light coming from the bedroom, before grabbing his hands and putting them back on her waist. "Not at all. Now, time for that dance."

Starr hit play and the soft ballad filled the room; Schuyler smiled warmly, pulling her back into his arms and holding her securely. Starr nestled her head against his chest, a warm feeling of complete peace spreading throughout her as they swayed lightly to the beat.

They danced in comfortable silence for a couple of minutes, as Starr felt that overwhelming rush of love for him more than ever and took a deep breath, trying to work up her courage; if she was ever going to say it, this seemed like an ideal moment.

"Starr," Schuyler murmured against her hair a moment later, just as she was about to speak.

"Yeah?" she asked softly.

Schuyler took a deep breath as well now, gently halting their dance and pulling back so he could look her in the eyes, cupping her face in his hands.

"I love you."

Starr instantly felt her heart leap into her throat, and for a moment, she felt almost dizzy with a disbelieving sort of joy, her head spinning.

"I love you too," she said instantly, a wide grin appearing on her face.

His eyes lit up the way she imagined hers must have, and, unable to contain this overwhelming happiness she felt, Starr just pressed her hand to the back of his head and pulled his lips down to hers, kissing him passionately, intensely; she kissed him with everything she had in her, hoping it would express everything that she knew words would fail to. Schuyler crushed her body to his, holding her in that perfect way that made her wish he never had to let go, and Starr felt like she was floating on cloud nine.

Schuyler had been right; she would always remember this night, but not because of the big glitzy prom- because of this, this moment right now, dancing in this little motel room in her sweats with the guy she loved more than she'd ever thought possible, as he said those three words to her. This had to be the very definition of a perfect moment.


	6. Chapter 6

"Rest in peace, Chloe," Starr murmured softly after she had spoken to her for several minutes, placing a rose on the headstone.

She'd tried to make a habit of coming here ever since she discovered the truth, having developed something of a connection to this baby that had never been given a chance, after all the time she'd spent talking to her. It made her heart ache to think of all those times she had come here and spoken to the wrong child, to think of how long her headstone hadn't even said the right name.

With a deep breath, Starr rose to her feet and began to wander through the cemetery, looking for a particular grave; she'd been wanting to do this for a while now, and it just seemed right. Finally locating the right headstone, Starr smiled cautiously.

"Hi, Dr. Joplin," she said softly, carefully setting the rest of the bouquet done. "It's Starr. With everything that's happened with Hope and Chloe, I thought it only seemed right to come talk to you. I always knew you weren't to blame for my baby's death, and I'm just...oh, God," she sighed, surprised by the hot tears suddenly burning her eyes. She quickly brushed them away.

"I'm just _so_ sorry that you thought you were, that the guilt led you to do this. I didn't know you very well, but Schuyler talks about you a lot, and so I know you were a really amazing women, and I know from experience that you were a wonderful doctor. I liked you a lot. Schuyler tells me all the time not to feel this way, but I can't help still feeling guilty for what my dad to you, and what happened with the baby switch, all of it. Honestly, I still don't understand how Schuyler doesn't regret me ever coming into your lives," she admitted quietly. "If I hadn't come along, my dad never could have blackmailed you, he couldn't have made you feel like you did something wrong with Hope because you were distracted, Bess couldn't have made you believe she was dead. You'd still be around if you just hadn't met me…Schuyler would still have his mom. You'd get to see what he's become.

"You know, I think you'd be really proud of him," she said, a small smile appearing through her tears as she thought of him. "No, I know it, actually. It sounds like you always had faith in him, even at his worst, and he really proved you right. I know he wishes you could see how he's changed- I do too. I just…really wish I could have gotten to know you. Although, all things considered, I don't know if you would have liked me very much," she laughed sadly.

"She would have loved you."

Starr whipped around in surprise, smiling nervously when she saw Schuyler standing behind her, his own flowers in hand. Throwing a quick cautious look around the cemetery, Schuyler settled for greeting her with a warm smile, both knowing it was best to keep a physical distance, just to be safe.

"That much I know; my mother was a woman of good taste. What are you doing here?" he asked as he set the flowers down.

"I, uh, just wanted to talk to your mom- I hope that's okay," she said hesitantly, nervously licking her lips.

"Starr, of course it is- it's more than okay."

"How much of that did you hear?" she asked sheepishly.

"Pretty much everything from your apology on," Schuyler said, furrowing his brow. "I really wish you wouldn't blame yourself, Starr," he sighed, fighting to keep himself where he was; it was killing him to be unable to touch her right now. "No part of that mess was in any way your fault."

"Well, _I _wish you had better self esteem," she replied, smiling weakly, shrugging. "These are the burdens we bear."

"Starr-"

"So, are you busy tonight?" she interrupted quickly. Schuyler gazed at her for a moment, debating whether or not to push it, and decided he could let it go for now.

"Unfortunately," he said apologetically. "I'll be at the center tonight."

"You don't usually volunteer on this day," she noted curiously.

"Oh, I'm not counseling today; I have a narcotics anonymous meeting."

"You still go?" Starr asked in surprise. Schuyler nodded.

"Not regularly, but yeah, I do. The guy who runs the meetings has been clean for thirteen years and he still goes to his meetings too; you have to keep up with it. It's when you get too complacent that you're putting yourself in a dangerous situation."

Starr fell silent, just quietly looking at the grave for a minute; he'd made comments similar to that one before, and it tugged at this twisted curiosity she had inside of her.

"Do you ever still want the drugs?" she finally asked, so quietly that he barely caught it; Starr kept her gaze downcast, worried that she had pushed too far. Schuyler didn't say anything for a long time, and finally sighed grimly.

"I wish I could just say no, but I never want to be anything less than completely honest with you, so…yeah, once in a great while," he admitted, a hint of self loathing in his tone that made Starr's heart ache. She stared at him intently, creeping closer. "Drugs became my coping mechanism for the longest time, and when bad things happen, I occasionally feel that urge flare up. When I found out my mother had killed herself, I came…really close," he admitted roughly, eyes darkening with shame. Starr reactively reached out to take his hand in hers, but quickly let go as she realized they were in public, frustration surging through her body; she hated this sometimes. "I had to go to my sponsor's house and practically have him handcuff me to a chair. The day of her funeral was rough too. I sometimes still have…nightmares," he muttered vaguely. "and when I wake up from them, for just a second, I crave it."

Starr wondered what kind of nightmares these were, but decided she'd asked more than enough today and didn't look request details, gazing at him with patient, understanding eyes.

"I've never noticed you having nightmares," she allowed herself to mention curiously. Schuyler smiled slightly.

"That's because they don't happen when you're with me. When you're there and I can hold you, everything else just… goes away." Starr felt a rush of happiness to know she brought him even a fraction of the peace he brought her.

"You make it all go away for me too," she said quietly. "And I'm glad I do that for you. Thank you for being honest with me, Schuy."

"I wish I was stronger than that," he sighed after a beat. "I wish being honest meant I could tell you something else, but-"

"Stronger?!" Starr interrupted in disbelief, frantically shaking her head. "Schuyler, come on! Look at you, look how far you've come! I admit, I can't claim I understand what addiction's like, because I don't, but it seems like you're doing amazing to me. It hasn't been that long since you got clean in the first place; to only want it in your worst moments, for seconds, and to never give in? That's _strength_. You expect way too much of yourself, you know that?" Schuyler opened his mouth to reply, but Starr pressed on. "I don't know if this even means anything, but after hearing everything you've told me about who you _used_ to be and seeing who you are _now_, I'm proud of you, Schuyler; it says a lot that I still can't even begin to picture you that way, that it's not even possible based on my image of who you are now."

"Of course that means something, Starr," Schuyler broke in, sounding truly startled that she could think anything else. "That means everything."

Starr slowly smiled, touched that what she thought of him mattered so much. After a moment, she managed to tear her eyes from his and lightly tapped the headstone in front of them.

"And like I said; I know she'd be proud too."

Schuyler bowed his head for a minute, taking a shaky breath, and Starr felt a desperate need to offer some kind of comfort, be near him, but managed to resist.

"Thank you, Starr," he said to her quietly, quickly scanning the graveyard once more for safety before looking back to her. "I love you, y'know that?"

"So I've heard," Starr replied playfully, secretly wondering if she was ever going to stop feeling breathless when he said those words to her. "I love you too," she returned seriously, having no idea that her words were making it just as painful for him not to touch her as it was for her. "I should probably get going, huh? Give you a minute with your mom before you have to get to the center."

"You don't have to-"

"I should," she interrupted, smiling. "Just call me later tonight, okay?"

"Of course. Oh, Starr," he called after her quickly as she turned to leave, recalling something. "Uh, hey, mentioning the center just reminded me; did anyone tell you Cole's being released today?"

"What? No," Starr said with wide eyes, nervously playing with the end of her hair as she paused for a beat. "Do you think he's ready?"

"My opinion doesn't really matter."

"But I want to know; do you think he's going to keep going the way he has been, getting better?"

"Honestly?" Schuyler sighed, shrugging. "No. I really hope Cole proves me wrong, but from what I've seen, the only reason Cole's clean is because he doesn't have access to pills, not because he's committed to giving them up. Once he knows he's not under supervision and doesn't have to take a drug test at any moment, and his dealer comes around again, I think Cole's going to fall into addiction all over, and it's a cycle that's just going to repeat again and again until he can admit he has a problem and commit to fixing it."

Starr sighed as well now, nervously biting her lip as she pictured Cole's angry outbursts when he was high.

"In that case, I hope for once that you're wrong too. Talk to you tonight?"

"Talk to you tonight."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

With a low groan of frustration, Langston irritably threw her pencil at the wall; it must be a requirement that all teachers at this school enjoy giving out cruel amounts of work or something.

Giving up on trying to analyze the symbolism in the book for English class, Langston stood and walked out of her room, heading to Starr's to see if she was up for a break too.

"Hey, Starr! You up for getting some ice cream, visiting Markko for a while? I have to get away from homework for a while, or I'm going to go…"

Langston trailed off as she got to Starr's door and heard her voice inside, realizing her friend was talking on the phone and hadn't even heard her. She leaned against the frame to wait, not trying to eavesdrop, but unable to help overhearing.

"Yeah, that's great. Okay; I've got a couple things to finish up here anyway. Alright. See you tomorrow! I love you, Schuyler."

Langston, who had idly been resting against the wall, suddenly bolted upright as if she'd been shocked, her eyes growing wide as her stomach dropped to her feet; what? What the_ hell_ was that? _Schuyler_? As in, Mr. J? Langston's head spun wildly as she processed what she'd overheard, making her feel dizzy.

Starr had just told Schuyler she loved him. She was talking to him in a way no student would talk to their teacher, and then she had friggin' told him she _loved him_, like it was no big deal…like she'd done it before…like she was sure of what the response would be. What the hell was going on?! How had this gone from being a simple crush to whatever it was Langston had just heard?

Spurred on by her wild, confused thoughts, Langston suddenly began to move without even realizing what she was doing, seizing the doorknob and dramatically throwing the door open. Starr jumped, then laughed as she saw her best friend, relaxing.

"Hey, Lang; for future reference, a little warning would be good if you're going to-"

"'I love you, Schuyler'?" Langston blurted out, her tone both questioning and demanding. Starr instantly froze in place, her heart seizing with a cold chill.

"Oh my God," she uttered, to herself more than anyone. Langston stared at her in disbelief.

"So that is what I heard?" Starr clenched her eyes shut, breathing violently, and Langston knew it was confirmation. "What is going on, Starr?!" she shrieked.

"Okay, Langston, just let me explain!" Starr cried desperately, rushing to her side.

"Uh, hi, that's what I want too! Just tell me this much right now- is Mr. J- Schuyler, whatever- like…your boyfriend?" After a lengthy pause, Starr bit her lip and nodded.

"Yes," she whispered. "That's exactly what he is."

"Oh my God!" Langston shouted. "Since when?!"

"Since the night Cole went to rehab," she admitted meekly, hoping the length of time she'd been hiding this wouldn't make it worse.

To her surprise, Langston suddenly softened, her eyes filling with sympathy as she gazed at Starr, shaking her head.

"Oh, _Starr_. That's what this is about?"

"What?" she asked with a frown, startled. "What do you mean?"

"You were upset about Cole going to rehab, so you turned to Schuyler?"

"Oh my God!" Starr now said the words in disbelief, recoiling. "No! Nononono_no_, that is not even remotely what happened, Langston!"

"Well, that's what it sounds like! It sounds like you were upset about the guy you're still in love with getting shipped off to rehab, so you turned to the guy you've been going to this whole time to deal with your feelings for Cole. Maybe you did develop a real crush or something in the process, Starr, I'll give you that, but even if you did, it sounds like he's a jerk and he took advantage-"

"No it doesn't!" Starr shouted, horrified by what Langston was saying. "That's just what you want to hear! You don't know what happened and you're just projecting what you want to believe! God, this is why I didn't tell you already!" she snapped.

"Why? Because I _care_ and-"

"Don't make it sound like that's what you're doing! This isn't because you care about me, it's about Cole," Starr accused, her eyes hardened; she'd been completely unprepared to deal with her worst fears about her best friend's reaction being realized, and was completely on the defensive now. "You are _always_ on his side lately, always!"

"Cole's side _is_ your side, Starr, you just don't see that!"

"Excuse me?! Langston, you and Cole don't get to decide that, I do! I do not want Cole, I do not love him- I don't know how to make that any clearer!"

"Oh, but you love Schuyler now?" she snorted dismissively. Starr clenched her fists, feeling her stomach twist; hearing her relationship mocked like that, by her best friend in the world, physically hurt.

"Yes, I _do_," she said, calming down and saying the words clearly and firmly, hoping it would make Langston understand. "And he loves me."

"No he doesn't, Starr! There's no way. But you know what? Cole does. Cole has _always_ loved you, and what you guys have is _real_. You've spent time building what you guys have, and it's solid, just going through a rough patch right now, but that's no reason to give up and turn to some fantasy you've created with our teacher. And honestly, I think it's kind of messed up that when Cole needs you the most, you're not there because you're too busy having an affair with-"

"Langston, _shut up_," Starr hissed. She spoke quieter than ever, but the words were dripping with venom, and Langston instantly did as she was told, appearing genuinely startled. "Cole doesn't love me. He thinks he does, and you too, apparently, but Cole wouldn't…he wouldn't treat me the way he always has if he loved me, and I _know_ that because Schuyler has _shown_ me how a guy who loves you is supposed to treat you- what we have is not some _affair_.

"And I'm sorry, but it's not my responsibility to save Cole, and I couldn't even if it was; he's not going to get off pills because he gets back together with his girlfriend, that doesn't even make sense! Cole has to save _himself_, he has to get clean for _himself_; it won't mean anything and it won't last otherwise. And it's really unfair of you to try and put that burden on me."

"Since when is Cole a _burden_ to you? Is that the kind of stuff Mr. J says to you about him?"

To both of their surprise, instead of firing right back, Starr now just seemed to crumple, her shoulders slumping as she buried her head in her hands miserably.

"You just don't understand, Langston, you're not even _trying_ to."

"You're right," Langston snapped in frustration. "I don't understand why you're doing this, and I _don't _understand why you never told me."

Before Starr could say a word, Langston spun on her heel and stormed out, slamming the door behind her. Starr stared after her blankly for a moment, feeling numb, but it didn't last; something inside of her twisted painfully, and with a choked sob, Starr collapsed into tears, falling to her knees as she bawled helplessly; it felt like she had just lost her best friend, and her heart felt broken.

Starr reflexively reached for the phone to call Schuyler, knowing he was the only person who could make her feel better now, but she quickly stopped, realizing that wasn't an option. He would blame himself for ruining her friendship with Langston or something, freak out, and Starr was not going to do anything that meant risking him pulling away from her all over again out of guilt, it wasn't an option. So, instead, Starr just curled up in a ball and cried her heart out in the silence of her room.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Starr was lying on her bed quietly two hours later, trying to no avail to fall asleep since she had no energy to do anything else, when there was a soft knock at her door.

"Mom, whoever, please go away," she called out weakly.

"It's Langston," came the timid response. "Can I, um, please come in?"

"Oh, uh…yeah," she called back, still not budging from where she was. The door opened slowly and Langston poked her head in; she had an expression of shame on her face, and Starr instantly relaxed; at least she didn't seem to be back for round two.

"Hey," she said nervously, walking over and hesitantly perching on the end of the bed.

"Hey," Starr said cautiously, waiting for her to explain.

"So, I, uh, went to go see Markko when I left. To rant, really," she admitted sheepishly. "I replayed our conversation for him, word for word-" Starr suddenly bolted upright, appearing terrified.

"Langston, you-"

"No, no, not the Mr. J stuff!" Langston said quickly. "Just the stuff about Cole, basically. I was expecting him to completely agree with me, and instead, he got _mad_, and he said _you_ were right, and um, Markko and I proceeded to have a nice long talk," she laughed nervously. "And he made me realize that I had been…"

"Completely unreasonable?"

"A complete bitch," Langston said bluntly; Starr couldn't help laughing. "And then I thought about the parts I hadn't even told him, and realized that if my best friend hid the biggest thing in her life from me for so long, it had to be for a reason, and that reason had to be because I haven't been a very good friend. You were right; your side is the one you say it is, period, and I really want to be on your side, _always_, just like you've always been on mine, sooo…I'm hear to listen. If you even want to talk," she added hastily. Starr quickly smiled.

"I do! I want to talk. You have no idea how much I've wanted to be able to tell you all about him, and us."

"So, why didn't you?" Langston asked, trying to sound as non judgmental as possible. Starr shrugged uncomfortably.

"You'd been trying like crazy to push me and Cole together. Everytime I tried to talk about Schuyler, all you did was insult my feelings and tell me it was a crush that would never be anything more, that it wasn't real, that it was about Cole, that I should just go back to him."

"Because I didn't _understand_, Starr. Since when do you just give up? You could have explained everything to me and made me understand. That's what I want you to do now. If you need to shake me or something to get your points across, then do it, go crazy!" Starr giggled.

"Hopefully that won't be necessary. Okay, um…wow, where to start?" she muttered to herself.

"Oh, wait; can I say one more thing first?"

"Sure."

"Um, it was about what you said, about it being unfair of me to expect you to save Cole; Markko and I talked about that a lot, and, you're absolutely right," she sighed. "You couldn't if you wanted to, it's up to him, and it's _not_ your job to do that, and I was being a hypocrite; I mean, I wasn't exactly rushing in to save him from himself either, even though I was supposedly so worried. Honestly, Starr, I don't think I ever _really_ believed it was your responsibility.

"I think I was just so _scared_ about what was happening to my friend, and it made it worse that I couldn't understand why or what we could do to help, so I needed to tell myself there was just something we weren't doing; something simple that we could just do that would make him better, and I happened to decide _you_ were it; that if you went back to him it would save our friend and he was only as bad as he was because you were refusing. I know that's really horrible-"

"It's not- that makes sense."

"But it wasn't fair. I expected all that of you just because you guys were such a great couple, like being a great couple again was somehow gonna make him not want pills anymore. I'm sorry, Starr."

"Well, you're forgiven," Starr said gently. There was a pregnant pause as Starr tried to figure out how to say what she wanted to. "Langston…why do you think Cole and I were such a great couple? I mean, you keep saying how real and powerful what we had was, but…why? _What_ did we have? Don't just give me some general 'You were perfect together', I want a real reason, an example. What did he and I ever talk about that was real, deep? What did we ever really get about each other that nobody else could? What was so special about us that it made us any different than any other couple of melodramatic teenagers who think they're the next Romeo and Juliet?"

Langston automatically opened her mouth to reply, but slowly shut it, furrowing her brow as she realized she didn't _have_ a real, meaningful answer or example to give.

"You have Hope," she tried weakly. Starr cocked her head and gave her a look.

"Do I even really need to get into why that means nothing about us as a couple?"

"No," Langston said sheepishly. "I was grasping at straws there."

"I think you have this image of me and Cole being the greatest love of the ages because what we had was pretty serious for teenagers, and because we were all so young when it started, and when you're young, it does seem like a huge deal- that image just kind of stuck with you, but you've gotta let it go because it's not reality. Cole and I were never meant to be more than what we were, we just weren't. We don't love each other, and we've just…I don't know, _outgrown_ each other. Dating Cole, at least to me, would be like…trying to wear a pair of shoes that don't fit anymore just because they used to be my favorite and they're still really comfortable. Does that just sound weird?" she asked, laughing. Langston giggled, shaking her head.

"No, I think I'm getting it. So, um…what you and Mr- er, Schuyler- have _is_ real?" she asked slowly, unable to help but notice the way her friend's face lit up into a brilliant smile just at the sound of his name.

"Yeah, it is. Langston, I have been falling for him since the first time we talked after class, and I _tried_ to fight it, we both did, _especially_ him, but we _can't_, and I don't want to. I know I say this like, every time we talk about him, but it's true; he and I just have this _connection_. I don't even fully understand it, but he gets me like I never thought anybody could, and I get him, and I'm just drawn to him. Knowing I have him makes me feel so much less alone. And I'm _so_ happy, Langston," she told her friend, pressing her hand to her heart as grinned. Her voice was thick with emotion, and Langston had to smile just at the sight of her friend in such a good place; it was impossible not to believe her words when she looked like that.

"You really love him, huh?"

"I really do."

"And he loves you back, right?"

"Unbelievably, yes," she laughed, still giddy that she could say that. Langston scoffed.

"Unbelievable, please; he loves you back because he's _smart_, you remember that." Starr lit up at her friend's accepting tone.

"So, you're…okay with this?" she questioned hopefully, not daring to believe yet.

"Yeah," Langston said simply, shrugging. "I mean, it's a little strange still, and it'll take some adjusting. But I love you, and you're happy, and this seems like it's been good for you, so…okay," she said simply, shrugging.

Starr stared at her in shock for a moment, then suddenly squealed, throwing her arms around her friend in a grateful hug, knocking them both off the bed and onto the floor as they both laughed hysterically.

"I love you, Langston, I really do. I swear, I am going to make it up to you for keeping this a secret so long. Whatever you want, I'll do it!"

"You might regret that eventually," she laughed. "But for now, let's just start with you telling me everything about him."

Starr spent the next hour explaining how she and Schuyler had finally gotten together to Langston, telling her about everything that had happened with them since, and Langston seemed to forget about her hesitancy about supporting the relationship fully, getting more and more into it and more and more excited about them, even squealing when Starr described Schuyler telling he'd loved her, just as Starr had been doing internally ever since then.

"Okay, so what else?!" Langston asked eagerly.

"Sorry, Langston, that's about where we leave off," she laughed. "We've hit the 'To be continued' mark."

"What? You're not leaving out any details?" Langston asked suspiciously.

"Of course not- like _what_?"

"Liiiike, have you guys ever…" Langston just waggled her eyebrows, looking at her pointedly.

"Oh my God, Langston!" Starr squealed.

"Uh-uh, Starr, that's not an answer! You said you'd do anything to make it up to me!"

"And this is what you want?!" she demanded, cracking up. Langston rolled her eyes, throwing a pillow at her.

"I'm a perv, big deal. Come on, we're teenage girls, we're supposed to talk about boyfriends and how far we've gone and all that, and you have a lot of catching up to do!"

"Okay, I guess. Um, no, we haven't. Not for lack of trying on my part, though," she admitted quietly, a faint blush tingeing her cheeks. Langston gave a dramatic gasp.

"Starr, you little minx."

"I can't help it!" she laughed, growing serious as she blushed furiously now. "I love him so much, Langston, and I really want…oh God, I can't believe I'm talking about this- I just really want to be with him in that way, really be with him completely. We've come close- uh, really close after prom," she muttered. Langston gasped.

"I _knew _you looked like you had near sex hair when you came back! Ugh, this is why you're supposed to listen to your instincts."

"But he always stops; I think he's trying to be responsible or something, but he's killing me- I just want him so much."

"Ooh, you know what? You should wait until he gets in the shower, and then when he's in just a towel, just like, start throwing your clothes off and really go for it; see how well he can resist then!" Starr looked at her friend with wide eyes, appearing stunned by the suggestion, and Langston shrugged. "I watch a lot of TV when I should be doing homework, it gives you ideas."

"Uh, thanks, but I don't really think he'd be into that," Starr giggled. "Jeez, Lang, I can't believe in three or four hours, you went from hating the idea of us and fighting it, to trying to help me _seduce_ him."

"It's a girl's prerogative to change her mind," Langston sniffed. Both girls laughed again. "Honestly, Starr, I never had a problem with Mr. J himself or the idea of you two, hard as that may be to believe; it was just getting past the you and Cole thing that I had to deal with. I'm cool now."

"Well, I'm glad."

"So, I have to ask; just how serious would you say you guys are?"

"Well, um, he gave me a key to his place," Starr said quietly, slowly smiling as she thought about it. "And I all but live there, honestly; pretty much whenever I'm not with you, I'm there. So I guess pretty serious."

"Wow. Wow. Nevermind the fact that you've got a boyfriend who has a 'place', you have a key to it and practically live there. _Wow_. Isn't this weird to think about- I mean, you're so together and mature, and you have a _child_, and you're dating a twenty-three year old, and your relationship is all, like, committed and domestic already, while not so long ago, you and Britney were, like, fighting over who got to go to prom with the hot boy in school."

"You make it sound like I'm middle aged! Don't act like I'm all fully matured now or something!"

"You're not?"

"Would I have wanted to deck Adriana just for calling Schuyler hot if I was?"

"Yeah, probably not," she snickered, as Starr thought about what she'd said.

"Hey, can you imagine if Britney was still here?"

"Oh, God," Langston laughed. "I think our only option would be to kill her, Starr, honestly, because she would never let this go".

"I wonder whatever happened to her."

"Oh, let me tell you, Starr, boarding school bitches don't _mess_; I'm sure she's getting a taste of her own medicine these days."

"Ah, nice thought. Think we could write someone at the school and convince them to send us a tape?"

"Well, it's always worth a try," she giggled. There was a moment of peaceful silence, and Langston gazed at her friend with a warm smile. "Thanks for forgiving me, Starr, for making me understand."

"Thank you for just…_everything_ tonight. But I hope you know this means I'm going to be gushing to you all the time now."

"Looking forward to it."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

With a newfound bounce in her step, Starr let herself into Schuyler's room early the next morning. She had just discovered a new benefit to Langston knowing the truth; her friend could now cover for her whenever she wanted to see Schuyler, making it _so_ much easier to get out of the house. Good timing for this to happen, too, because Jack, still hating her because of Todd's absence, seemed determined to find something he could use against Starr, and the last thing she needed was to slip up one night and have her little brother discover the truth.

There was no sign of him, and Starr realized as she quickly glanced at the clock that he was probably still in bed, taking advantage of the weekend to sleep in. Starr quietly crept to his bedside and grinned at the sight of him sleeping with the pillow she always used when she was here hugged to his chest. Starr managed to slide onto the bed without making a sound and affectionately ran her fingers through his messy hair, before leaning down and lightly brushing her lips across his.

As she pulled back, Schuyler's eyes fluttered open, and he smiled softly when he saw her, wordlessly taking her hand and pulling her down to him, causing Starr to giggle as she cuddled against his chest, pushing her pillow out of the way.

"Nice way to wake up," he murmured, voice tired but happy.

"I'll have to do it more often, then."

"Looking forward to it," he chuckled as he tossed the pillow aside. "How'd that get here?" he muttered to himself.

"Schuyler, just admit that you hug my pillow and cry on the nights I'm not here, it's okay."

"My sobs lull me to sleep," he deadpanned. Starr giggled. "What are you doing here so early?"

"Uh, there's something I kind of need to talk to you about."

"Uh-oh; that's not a good tone. What have I told you about bad news before ten in the morning?"

"Not bad news," she laughed reassuringly. "Big, but not bad. Um…okay, I'm just going to say it- Langston found out about us."

"_What?_ Schuyler asked, now fully awake. "How did that happen?"

"Sadly, my stealth skills failed me for once; she overheard me talking to you on the phone."

"Is everything okay? What happened?"

"Everything's fine," she reassured him. "Trust me, I would have shown up here last night freaking out if it wasn't. Her reaction was…not good, at first. She kept insisting I really wanted Cole," Starr told him reluctantly. She could feel Schuyler stiffen uncomfortably, and flinched; well at least now his discomfort was something like jealousy, not a suspicion that Langston was right like it would have been once, she considered that an improvement. "And then she stormed out, and for a second, I seriously that she and I were just…done, and I was upset, to say the least."

"Oh, Starr," he murmured sympathetically, rubbing light circles on her back, "Why didn't you call me?"

"I was so upset, I just didn't even think to," she lied smoothly. "But it's all okay now, because when she left, she and Markko had a talk- you weren't brought up- and he saved me by knocking some sense into her. She came back to apologize and actually listen, and, very long story short, she's cool now. She's over the Cole thing, and she's behind us one hundred percent. Sooo…yay!" she said simply, giving an adorably dorky fist pump to emphasize, that was quite possibly one of the cutest things Schuyler had ever seen. "Oh, and because we've got her support, she has now offered to cover for me anytime I need it, meaning I can get out a lot more now, so prepared to get very sick of me."

"Never going to happen," he promised.

"You think that _now_," she laughed, shaking her head.

To her surprise, Schuyler, usually the one to hold back, suddenly rolled her over so she was pinned underneath him and kissed her passionately, keeping himself up with one hand as he ran the other down her waist agonizingly slowly, until he pressed his hand to the bare skin of her back underneath her shirt, causing Starr to shiver into his kiss.

Starr just gazed up at him with dazed, starry eyes when he pulled away, barely remembering to breathe, and Schuyler just chuckled, quickly pressing one more kiss to her lips.

"Now have I convinced you?"

"Nope," she lied playfully. "I think you still need to make a believer out of me."

Starr grabbed him by the shoulders and forcefully pulled him back down to her, kissing him eagerly, and Schuyler responded with renewed fervor. He ran his hand from her back, down her thigh, and suddenly hitched her leg over his waist, causing Starr to moan low in her throat, reflexively pushing herself even closer against him as she pressed her tongue to his lips.

Starr was just thinking this might finally be the day she lucked out when moments later, Schuyler, unfortunately, seemed to come to his senses, and he abruptly pulled back from the kiss and rolled off of her, apparently having decided that was far enough; if she didn't know that she needed to ask him something else, Starr would have pushed it, but she just let it go for now, pausing a moment to regain her breath before speaking.

"Uh, before you so rudely distracted me," she laughed nervously, smoothing down her hair. "I needed to ask you something else; Langston wants to know if she can tell Markko about you and me," she said, glancing at him with a clear question in her eyes.

"That's totally up to you, Starr," he replied.

"What?" she asked, startled. "But, I mean, it affects you way more than me. If somebody were to slip up and spill something, you have so much more to lose than I do." Schuyler paused for a moment, and then simply smiled, shrugging.

"I don't care."

"You…don't care?" Starr repeated slowly, her eyes wide with disbelief. "You don't care about the possibility of your entire career being destroyed?"

"Starr, of course I care, I love teaching, but I don't want you to feel like you have to lie to your friends and hide things from them because of me. I want you to tell whatever you want to whoever you want, and if something does end up slipping, I'll deal with it; everything will be fine. It's up to you," he repeated. Starr smiled softly as Schuyler lightly stroked her hair.

"Okay; then I'm gonna tell her it's alright. Langston will probably be less likely to accidentally spill something if she can talk to someone anyway," Starr laughed. "Besides, Markko can keep a secret, nobody will find out anything from him. My friends are good that way, it's just my family that's the problem." Schuyler laughed, but Starr looked up at him with wide eyes. "Uh, I'm not being funny, Schuy. If my dad ever found out…" Starr trailed off, shuddering.

"That bad?"

"Worse than anything you're imagining, I can pretty much guarantee that," she sighed, anxiety rushing through her blood just thinking about it. "He's tried to kill Cole- and I'm not exaggerating, literally, hands around the throat, trying to beat him to _death_, kill- more than once. When Langston and Markko tried to cover for us once, and he caught them, my dad also beat up Markko and hit Langston. And one of those times with Cole when I was pregnant, and he just gets so lost in his anger that he doesn't know what's going on, and when I tried to stop him, he pushed _me_ down a flight of stairs before he even seemed to realize what he was doing."

"Son of a bitch," Schuyler reflexively spat without even thinking, anger gripping him tightly over the thought of _anybody_, let alone her own father, ever doing something to hurt Starr. She just sighed sadly, drawing his attention away from that fury and back to her.

"Pretty good description of him. And, keep in mind, Cole was a teenage boy, while you are a grown man, so everything he did to Cole, you should probably double. Yes, somehow double attempted murder," Starr muttered, worry clouding her eyes as she buried her head in her hands. "Oh, God, I probably should have given you this warning about my dad _before_ we got involved, huh?" she asked miserably, her good mood having been killed by thoughts of her father. Starr felt a twist of guilt as she imagined it. What if something went wrong, and her dad found out, and Schuyler didn't just lose his job, but got seriously hurt? How would she ever be able to live with herself?

"It wouldn't have mattered to me," Schuyler said softly, prying her hands from her face and tilting her head so she was looking him in the eyes. "I wouldn't have done anything differently."

"Maybe you should have," Starr said weakly, unable to shake the mental image she now had of her dad 'confronting' Schuyler. The thought of not being with Schuyler hurt more than almost anything, but that 'almost' just so happened to be because the thought of him hurt was worse.

"Hey, Starr, where is this coming from?" Schuyler asked gently. "Everything is fine. Your dad doesn't know, and odds are, he's not going to find out. And even if he does, it'll be okay- I can handle your dad," he told her with a reassuring smile. "Everything's going to be okay, I promise."

"And everything I just said really doesn't bother you, or freak you out?" Starr asked cautiously. Schuyler smiled, shaking his head.

"Remember what I said to you that first night? 'Being with you is worth anything.' I mean that. I love you, Starr."

Starr smiled brightly, the warm rush of happiness she felt quickly erasing her fears, and with a peaceful sigh, she just rested her forehead against Schuyler's, shutting her eyes.

"I love you too."

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Absent mindedly humming to herself, Langston continued to people gaze as she waited for Markko to get off work, eager to tell him about Starr and Schuyler now that Starr had given her the okay; this was way too big and exciting for her to keep to herself.

A moment later, Langston's attention was drawn away from the couple across the room as somebody slid into the booth across from her, and she startled for a second before seeing it was Cole, and laughed at herself.

"Hey, Cole, what's…" Langston, who had just been about to congratulate him on being released, slowly trailed off, her stomach clenching as Cole turned to face her; his eyes were cold and hard, he seemed edgy and frantic, and she knew instantly what that meant. _God_ he'd been out of rehab for a _day_, and after seeming like he was on the path to getting better, he'd already gotten high; how the hell had she ever believed Starr could save him from himself?

"Langston, I need your help," he sighed, sounding irritated. Langston just stared at Cole in disbelief; these pills were invasion of the body snatchers material. When he was high, Cole was a completely different person, he was unrecognizable, and she couldn't believe this _stranger_ expected her help.

"With what?" she snapped, making it clear she didn't _want_ to help.

"With Starr. I've been trying to see her ever since I got out yesterday, but she hasn't returned any of my calls!"

"So?" Langston asked shortly. Cole looked frustrated that she didn't get it.

"And I _need_ to see her."

"Why? What could possibly be so important?" she asked; Cole got downright obsessive about Starr when he was high, and after last night, she didn't find it romantic, like she used to, but just plain creepy. She couldn't believe she'd _ever_ found it anything but that.

Cole shook his head as he realized Langston wasn't exactly being receptive to what he had to say, gazing at her as if she'd betrayed him.

"So you're not going to help me, right? That's all you need to say."

"No, I'm not. You know why, Cole?" Langston hissed. "Because you've been out of rehab for a _day_, and you're already right back on the pills; I don't want someone like that anywhere near my friend. She tried to have faith in you, Cole, we _all_ tried to have faith in you, and this, right here, ruins it, and we're just done."

"I haven't done anything wrong!" he shouted, digging his fingers into his hair. "It's not like I hurt anyone!"

"I'm not even going to debate this with you, Cole! It doesn't even matter if that part's true or not. Just leave Starr alone, okay?"

"I thought you were on my side!"

"No, Cole, I never was!" she shouted right back, that hitting a nerve. "I've always been on hers! I thought being on Starr's side meant supporting you, but I was completely wrong about that. She's with someone else, Cole, okay? That's why the drugs aren't even what matter anymore."

"Who?" he demanded suspiciously, almost looking as if he was daring her to say it.

"Nobody you know," Langston shot back smoothly. "And it doesn't matter who he is. She _loves_ him, and he loves her, and they're _happy_, and if you keep trying to get in the way, I think Starr's going to give up on being your friend and you're gonna lose her completely. And y'know what? You'll lose me too, because if you can't let go then I'm going to have to think you don't really care about her and I will be damned if I'm friends with someone who doesn't care about my BFF, got it?"

"I love her, Langston," he pressed desperately. She sighed.

"No you don't, Cole."

"Don't tell me how I feel!" Cole exploded, jumping to his feet. Langston's eyes widened as she gazed at him, reactively shrinking back in her seat.

"Cole, I told you to leave!"

Langston sighed in relief as she heard Markko's upset voice and he appeared at her side a moment later, staring Cole down evenly.

"What do you even want _now_?"

"Like it matters," he hissed, glaring at both of them. "Your girlfriend's about as helpful as you are."

Cole turned, storming out of the café, and Langston and Markko both released a breath, exchanging a wide eyed, nervous look.

"Hey, you okay?" Markko asked, squeezing her arm. Langston sighed and stood up, quickly hugging and kissing her boyfriend.

"Yeah, I'm fine. He's just not thrilled about the fact that the talk you and I had last night brought me to my senses. You said you told him to leave before? Why, what did he want from you?"

"A urine sample," he scoffed, rolling his eyes. "He's freaking out, thinks he's gonna have to take another drug test soon. I don't know why the hell he thinks I'd want to _help_ him stay on drugs."

"I don't know why the hell Cole does _any_ of the crap he does these days," Langston snorted in frustration, shaking her head. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah. So, what did you need to talk to me about that was so important?" he asked, chuckling as he recalled her hysterical, shrieking phone call earlier.

"Oh my gosh!" she gasped, hands flying to her mouth; the incident with Cole had momentarily distracted her from her reason for coming here in the first place. "Come on, I have to tell you!"

Langston quickly tugged Markko out the front door, looking around to see if anybody was standing nearby. Seeing that the street was completely empty, Langston tugged Markko off to the side, too eager to tell someone about this huge news to wait.

"Okay, so, last night, when I told you about me and Starr's fight, I left some stuff out. Um, okay, I don't really know how to start, here, so I'll just say it; the whole reason the fight started is because I found out that…Starr is _dating_ Mr. J," she whispered dramatically.

"She's _what?!_ Is she insane?!" Markko cried.

"Shh! Look, don't freak out," Langston ordered urgently, looking around frantically. She sighed in relief- there was still nobody around. "That was my reaction at first too, but…this is good for her, Markko, it really is. She's my best friend, so I can read her like a _book_, and I can _see_ how happy she is; and that's all I want for her. She told me everything about how they got together, and what it's been like since, and he sounds like a really great guy, Markko, honestly, and like he's been really great _to_ her."

Markko opened his mouth to respond, but suddenly, he was cut off by the one voice Langston was terrified to hear right now, causing her heart to plummet to her feet.

"Is that so?!"

"Oh my God," Langston uttered softly at the sound of Cole's voice, which sounded torn somewhere between fury and glee.

She turned, dread in her stomach, and saw him walking over from the side of the building, a small, now empty, little plastic baggie in hand. Well, this was just fantastic; Cole hangs around in the alley to take a hit, and she winds up letting him hear _everything_. Crap, it had been all of _one_ day, and she'd let Starr's secret slip to the _one_ person who couldn't ever know- no wonder Starr had lied to her for so long.

"Starr really is _dating_ Joplin? She told you this herself? That's just great, that's just.._wow._ She's been lying to us for _months-_ she's been lying to _me,_" he spat, before mimicking her voice. "'I'm not with him, Cole!'"

"Starr didn't tell me anything, Cole!" Langston cried, her heart thundering wildly.

"Oh, bullshit, Langston, I just heard every word you said! Don't take a page from your friend's book and start lying to me too."

"Cole, chill out," Markko snapped, his head still spinning; he had no idea where he stood on this right now.

"Why?! My girlfriend won't take me back because she's too busy getting molested by her teacher, why the hell should I chill out?! How long has this been going on?"

Langston stammered wildly, not actually forming any real worlds, and her mouth suddenly felt extremely dry; she couldn't figure out quickly enough if it was better to continue to deny or not.

"I can't fucking believe her," Cole muttered to himself, beginning to pace around like a caged animal just waiting for someone to come close enough so he could strike. "Jesus, the night of the dance wasn't even the first time, was it? I can't _believe_ she is still with this perv even after what it caused that night!"

"What it caused?" Markko shouted before Langston could, looking at his friend with stunned, angry eyes. "You're kidding, right, Cole? That's some kind of sick joke on your part?"

"Yeah; _you_ were the one driving while intoxicated, Cole, how dare you blame that on Starr!"

"I feel like shit about that, okay, you know that, and I _always_ will, but-"

"No you don't!" Langston cried. "If you felt any ounce of remorse for what you did, you wouldn't be wasting the chance you were given by getting high over and over again! You wouldn't be claiming it's all Starr's fault!"

"Isn't it?! She doesn't care who gets hurt, as long as she gets to be with that creep. Hell, including herself, obviously, since she's apparently perfectly fine with letting him take advantage of her!"

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about!"

"No, you're just blind, Langston. And if you cared about Starr at all, you would stop her before she makes any more mistakes with this guy."

"Don't _you_ ever talk to _me_ about caring for Starr," she hissed, clenching her fists. "I'm her _best friend_, Cole, and right now, you're _nothing_ to her, I think I'm the one who knows better." Cole just shook his head, a grim smile on his face.

"Joplin is the only reason I'm nothing to her. She'll come to her senses sooner or later- you all will."

"I give up, Cole," Langston choked out; every single word that came out of his mouth was making her violently angry and yet causing a small part of her heart to break for him bcause of this state he was in, all at once, and she couldn't take it anymore. "Think whatever you want, I don't care anymore."

"Fine, I will," Cole said calmly, shrugging as he turned to leave.

"Cole!" Langston shouted after him quickly, a fresh surge of panic racing through her. "Where are you going? What do you think you're doing? Gonna run off and tell someone what you _think_ you heard?" she asked, stressing the word in hopes that he could still be convinced he'd been hallucinating or something. "You're a drug addict with no proof, it's pointless!"

"Thought you didn't care anymore," he shot back, not slowing his step.

"Oh my God," Langston moaned, burying her head against (the still very confused) Markko's shoulder. "What is he going to do? What are _we_ going to do?"

Cole simply smirked to himself as he continued to storm off; seemed like it was time he had a man to man talk with Schuyler Joplin.  
**End Chapter 7**

Sorry, not much Scarr time in this one, I know; I just needed to set everything up for the next arch of the story, where, I must warn you, things get angsty again :P

Oh, and, lol randomest notes ever here; I know there's like, debate over whether or not Todd actually hit Langston in that scene, but it certainly looked like it to me, so, uh…yeah, lol. And I missed the day of the stairs incident, and can't find the clip of it on youtube, so I have no idea how it actually played out, if it was an accident on Todd's part or not, I'm just going off of what I could find in recaps.


	8. Chapter 8

"Okay, let's see…Dirty Dancing?"

"Veto. Terminator?"

"Veto."

"You suck."

"You suck more," Starr grumbled playfully, still flipping through the movie channels.

"You know, I think we probably should have put a limit on how many vetoes we each get; would have made this whole process a lot faster."

"But less fun. Besides, the fact that we get so many just means the final selection really _is_ perfect!" Starr chirped brightly.

He just chuckled, and Starr continued to flip through the selection, as the room was just filled with silence- a comfortable, peaceful one, that made Starr feel like she could just be content here forever.

Unfortunately, the moment of bliss was abruptly broken minutes later, as there was suddenly a loud, thundering pounding on the outside of the door, and Starr leapt to her feet in surprise, her heart jumping. Schuyler appeared from the kitchen within seconds, instantly hovering by her side protectively as they both looked at the door apprehensively.

"_Mr. J_, open up!" a voice sneered sarcastically a moment later, causing Starr to gasp softly, as she looked to Schuyler with wide eyes.

"Oh my God, that's _Cole_," she hissed frantically, panic clouding her mind. "And it sounds like it's taken him all of a _day_ to prove you right." Schuyler just sighed, looking torn between anger, worry, sympathy, and disappointment, and Starr gave what could only be described as an anxious squeak, digging her fingers into her hair. "Schuyler! What do we do?!"

"I know you're there! I can see the lights are on!" Cole shouted, slamming his fist against the door again, causing Starr to flinch and reflexively reel back. Cole being like this reminded her way too much of that horrible day by the lockers.

"Maybe he'll just go away," Schuyler suggested.

"If you don't open the door, I'll kick it in!"

"Or not."

"Schuyler!"

"It'll be okay, Starr," Schuyler murmured as he seemed to snap out of a daze, reassuringly brushing his hand across her cheek. "Go hide and I'll deal with him, okay?"

"Okay," she breathed nervously, quickly squeezing his hand.

"I am not kidding, I will break this damn thing down if you make me!"

"Be careful, alright?" Starr begged. "I don't know what he might do when he's like this."

"I've got a pretty good idea," he sighed, looking grim as he recalled his own experiences when he'd been in a state like that.

Starr frowned slightly, not liking Schuyler comparing himself to Cole, but turned to leave until Schuyler quickly caught her arm, stopping her for a moment.

"Hey, Starr; I love you," he said firmly. She slowly blinked, confused.

"Love you too," she replied quickly, before hurrying off to the bathroom, where she then proceeded to climb into the shower and pull the curtain back, just to be safe.

Taking a deep breath, Schuyler quickly walked to the door and pulled it open with an appropriately confused look on his face. Cole, eyes hard and angry, instantly shoved past him, letting himself into the room.

"Cole, what the hell is going on?" he immediately asked, pretending to sound mystified.

"Where is she?"

"What are-"

"_Where is she?!_ Where's Starr?!" Cole thundered, momentarily grabbing Schuyler by his shirt before letting go, storming further into the place.

"Cole, aren't you supposed to checking in with Rachel about-"

"You son of a bitch," Cole hissed, seething with hatred. "You swore there was nothing going on!"

"Look, Cole, I don't even know what the hell you're talking about," Schuyler replied calmly as Cole flung the closet open, shoving things aside as he looked around. He went near the bathroom door and Schuyler's heart seized for a moment, before Cole just brushed past it.

"I just heard something _really_ interesting about you and your favorite student, _Mr. J._"

"I don't know what to tell you; rumors are always going to start after what Starr did the night of the dance, what do you want me to-"

"Are you sleeping with her?" Cole interrupted, his voice deadly quiet on this question.

For just a moment, Schuyler felt a surge of anger and he glowered at Cole, unable to believe this boy, who hadn't been anything to Starr in a long time, thought he had any right to storm into _his_ apartment and ask him that question, but he quickly swallowed it, going right back into his act.

"I'm not sleeping with Starr, Cole," he spat, fighting desperately to ignore the mental images that brought to mind.

Inside the shower, Starr flinched; okay, she knew he was acting, but still, did he have to sound so disgusted by the possibility?

"I never have."

"But if you had, I'm sure it would be all _her_ fault, right? Just like that kiss supposedly was? Because she just threw herself at you, totally out of the blue, you never saw it coming, right? And you didn't want it at all."

"Cole, what is this, where is this coming from, this anger?" Schuyler demanded, side passing that question. "What, are you high again? Do I need to call Rachel?"

"Don't make this about me!" Cole shouted, giving the dresser a violent kick. Starr jumped slightly, but Schuyler didn't budge. "I _know_ that you have been seeing her!"

"I don't know how to make this any clearer to you," he snapped, the anger he was feeling starting to creep out. "_I am not involved with Starr_, Cole. I don't want to offend you here, because I know how much you care about her, and Starr _is_ a great kid, a really great kid, but she is exactly that- a _kid._" Starr inhaled sharply, feeling like she'd just been slapped. "I can't tell you where she stands on this, but I can tell you that _I'm_ not interested." Cole snorted slightly.

"You know, Starr turns to you because she thinks you understand."

"I _do_ understand," Schuyler instinctively replied sharply, defensively, before realizing that was a mistake.

"No, you _don't_!" Cole roared, whipping around to punch the wall before turning back to Schuyler. "You don't _understand_- you _used_ her! You used her," he repeated, his voice softer, but his fury still unmistakable. "You _used_ her need to talk to someone- _anyone_ but me. _I_ couldn't help her, so she turned to _you_ and you took _advantage_." Schuyler roughly swallowed the lump building in his throat, simply bowing his head as his shoulders sagged. "You and your mom _ruined_ our lives."

Starr pressed her hands to her mouth, tears of disbelief burning her eyes as anger gripped her heart. How dare he? Schuyler took _advantage_ of her? After all Schuyler had done to try to keep her away, the idea seemed hysterical- just like the idea that Schuyler had been a replacement for Cole did. Cole was really flattering himself if he thought her feelings for Schuyler, the connection she'd had with him right from the start, had _anything_ to do with _him._ And how could he bring up Schuyler's mom? How could Cole be so _heartless_? And God, why was Schuyler just _letting_ him say all of this?

"Look, Cole," Schuyler began quietly. Starr strained to hear him; there was an unmistakable note of doubt in his tone, and it made her want to cry; after all they'd gone through together, how could he let Cole's awful words get to him, even for a split second? "I've only been teaching for a couple of years, and I've never encountered a situation like this before, I don't exactly know what I'm doing here. And maybe… maybe my guilt over my mother, about not doing what I could to help her…maybe I _am_ letting myself get too involved in Starr's grief." Starr swiped her hand across her eyes, resisting the urge to cover her ears. Not disagreeing with Cole to avoid suspicion was one thing, but actually saying he might be _right?_ "Okay? But I promise you, I have never slept with her, and I never will."

"Don't make me tell you this again," Cole hissed, stalking closer until he was right in Schuyler's face. "You _stay away_ from Starr."

The 'warning', Cole's possessive attitude about Starr, triggered something in Schuyler he wasn't proud of, an urge he'd never had while _sober_- the urge to just snap and strike. He reflexively clenched his fist, gritting his teeth together as for a split second, he almost lost control, before the jarring thought hit him that this was exactly the way he would have reacted when he was on drugs, causing him to instantly calm down and relax his body. Jesus, he knew better than that; how had he let Cole's own drugged up behavior draw him back into that state, even for the briefest of moments?

"Look, Cole," he replied evenly, reminding himself he was supposed to be convincing Cole there was nothing for him to worry about. "I don't know how else to say this to you. I don't _want_ Starr. She is just a child with a crush, okay?" Schuyler snapped, internally hating himself for how this must be hurting Starr. "Frankly, I _wish_ you two would get back together so she'd leave me alone already."

Starr flinched, taking a quiet but deep breath as her heart seized painfully for a moment; even knowing he was just flat out lying to get rid of Cole, hearing those things come out of Schuyler's mouth hurt like hell.

She realized a moment later _this_ had been what his last minute 'I love you' had been about, reassuring her before he had to say these things, and Starr relaxed; the pain wasn't erased, but it was soothed.

"I'm sure," Cole replied sarcastically, shaking his head as he turned to leave.

Cole walked back into the living room, and suddenly froze dead in his tracks as he glanced at the couch, for there, scrunched up on the corner cushion, was _Starr's jacket._ His first urge was to grab it, shove it Joplin's face, demand he try and worm his way out of this one, but knowing that creep, he'd actually find some way to. So instead, Cole just filed the information away as he stormed out the front door and slammed it behind him, smirking as an idea began to form; maybe he couldn't do anything about this, but Todd Manning certainly could. It was about time someone told him what his daughter was up to these days anyway.

Back inside the hotel room, Starr took a minute to compose herself, wiping away her tears and making sure there was no physical evidence that she'd been at all upset; the last thing she needed after everything Cole had just said and put Schuyler through was for him to also feel guilty because of her, to think he'd hurt her in some way. She was just being stupid, anyway; she knew very well that every word of that had been a lie to get Cole off their case- why had she let it affect her at all?

Finally, she stood and climbed out of the shower, wandering through the place until she found Schuyler in the living room, leaning against the couch with his back to her, his head hanging low. She quietly walked over to stand with him, placing her hand on his shoulder, and Schuyler instantly straightened up, turning to face her with a casual smile, like her ex-boyfriend, high on drugs, hadn't just stormed in here and accused him of such horrible things. Starr weakly returned the smile.

"So, uh…good job," she laughed nervously. "I don't know how he couldn't have believed that." She hesitated for a moment, wondering if she should stress what she hoped he already knew, that everything Cole said couldn't be further from the truth, but decided against it; she just wanted to forget the last ten minutes altogether.

Schuyler studied Starr carefully, feeling a sharp pain suddenly shoot through his heart as he noticed her clouded, bloodshot eyes, and instantly realized his words to Cole had gotten to her as well.

"Starr, I-"

"So, I think I'm good with Terminator, actually," she interrupted quickly, turning away from him. "Sarah Connor is pretty awesome, I can watch it for the girl power factor."

Schuyler hesitated; he could tell what she'd heard was still bothering Starr, but he also knew if he were to bring it up, she would just deny it.

"Terminator it is."

Starr nodded and started to walk to the TV, but Schuyler gently gripped her shoulders to stop her, hugging her back to his chest as he wound his arms around her waist, lightly pressing his lips to her neck. Starr smiled, covering his arms with her own as she leaned back against him.

"I love you, Starr," he repeated.

"I love you too," she said, turning her head and quickly kissing him before wriggling out of his grasp to go set up the movie.

Her phone, tossed somewhere on the couch, suddenly rang loudly, and Starr breathed a sigh of relief that it hadn't gone off while Cole was here, quickly grabbing it.

"Hello?"

"Starr, I am so sorry!" Langston wailed dramatically in greeting. "Look, I have something to tell you, but don't be mad, okay?!"

Schuyler, able to hear Langston's voice all the way from where he was standing, glanced over in surprise and confusion, and Starr couldn't help but laugh slightly, giving him a wry look as she whispered to him.

"Well, I guess we know how Cole found out."

"You already know he knows?! Did he go over there?! I'm so, _sosososo_ sorry, Starr!" Langston continued. "What happened, what did he do? Is everything-"

"Langston, breathe," she instructed gently. "I'll give you the full story in a second, but just know that everything's okay."

If Starr had known what horrible effects Cole's actions were going to cause the very next day, she might not have been so quick to think that.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Cole finally made it Todd Manning's the next day after school; his mother had been expecting him home early yesterday, and he'd had to check in with Rachel, and the last thing he'd needed was for one of them to think something was up if he showed up late. And today, of course, he'd been busy with school; honestly, it was a miracle that he'd made it through the entire day without bursting into Joplin's classroom and strangling him.

Cole gave a short, impatient knock on the door.

"Manning, open up!" he barked.

"Oh God, not you again," Todd sighed irritably as he opened the door. Cole clenched his jaw; he'd been so distracted entertaining himself with thoughts of what Todd would do to Mr. J when he found out the truth, that he'd briefly forgotten just how much he hated _him_ too. "What could you possibly want now?"

"Shut up," Cole hissed, violently shoving him back and stalking inside. "I have something to say, and you're going to listen."

"You know what, kid? If you're here to go off on me about your mom, save it. Get over it and get out.

"Oh, I'm- I'm not going anywhere, not…not until you hear this," Cole muttered, moving further into the house to prove his point. Todd smirked as he followed, looking amused by Cole's behavior.

"Boy, you're really w-w-w-wasted, aren't you?" Todd asked mockingly. "Speaking of, aren't you supposed to be in rehab?

"Look, don't you even mention my mom again," Cole snapped. "This has nothing to do with her _or_ me."

"Well, whatever it is-

"No, shut up! You've been too busy feeling sorry for yourself because my mom won't forgive you for _raping_ her again, that you don't even know what's going on with your own _daughter_."

"What are you talking about?" Todd asked tightly, finally seeming to take him seriously. "Is something wrong with Starr?"

"Oh, no, nothing's wrong with _Starr_; the problem is the teacher trying to get into her pants," he spat.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Exactly what I said! Her teacher is going after her."

"Not possible, Starr would have said something to me," Todd replied tightly.

"To you?" Cole laughed. "Maybe you can't accept this, Todd, but she _hates you._ And besides, he already has Starr buying into it- she's convinced she's in love with him or something, that he's some great guy- she's trying to protect him."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I'm _worried_ about her. And if you care about her at all, you should be too."

"Of course I care about my daughter- I love her," Todd snapped.

"Then listen to what I'm telling you and do something about it!"

"How do you know this teacher is going after her?"

"Because I saw them kissing," Cole replied, feeling the hot rage building within him as he remembered that fucking horrible night.

"You saw a teacher kissing Starr?" Todd repeated in disbelief, snorting. "You sure this wasn't some drug hallucination or-"

"Look, I know what I saw!" Cole exploded. "And if that's not enough for you, then consider the fact that yesterday, I _heard_ your daughter's best friend say Starr told her _herself_ that she's _dating_ this guy. You believe your own daughter? Oh, and let's not forget the fact that that when I went over there to confront the guy, your daughter's jacket was on his couch."

Todd went silent, and his expression was unreadable; Cole felt a twinge of satisfaction, knowing this meant something good was coming.

"Who is this teacher?" he asked, his voice eerily calm.

"Mr. J- Schuyler _Joplin._"

"Joplin?" Todd repeated in disbelief.

"Yep. You can find him at the Angel Square Motel."

"You lying to me?" Todd asked, stepping closer until he was face to face with the boy.

"No." Todd's hands shot out and gripped the front of his jacket tightly, his voice growing deadly.

"_Are you lying to me?_"

"I'm not lying!"

Todd studied him carefully for a moment, then let go, simply walking around the boy and to the front door.

"Lock up when you leave," he called over his shoulder.

Left alone in the silence of the room, all Cole could do now was smirk, imaging just what was about to happen to Schuyler Joplin when Todd got there.

Cole turned to leave himself, walking towards the door, only to stop when another man suddenly appeared from around the stairs, behaving so casually that you'd think he was the owner of the house; Cole furrowed his brow as the man came right over to him, smiling pleasantly.

"Uh…do I know you?" Cole asked slowly.

"I don't know; do you? I'm an old friend of your mother's," he offered. Cole frowned.

"I don't remember you."

"Oh, you weren't even born yet when she put me in Statesville." Cole breathed furiously as the realization hit him.

"Zach Rosen."

***~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

"So, you seemed to handle today pretty well. I think-"

"Ugh!" Starr shouted the second the door shut behind them, throwing her bag across the room. Langston startled in surprise; well, apparently Starr's calm behavior at school today had just been a front. "Sorry, what?"

"Um…nevermind."

"God, Cole as just _loving_ having something to hold over me, wasn't he?" Starr seethed, pacing angrily. "Just giving me that stupid smirk the whole day, knowing very well I'm freaking out over what he's going to do! And I can't even show him that I think something is wrong, so I have to be sunshine and smiles all day and bottle it all up!"

"I'm still so sorry, Starr," Langston apologized earnestly.

"Langston, it's not your fault Cole is being a selfish jerk," Starr sighed, rubbing her temples. "God, I don't even know how I managed to resist the urge to slap him today. If it weren't for the fact that we made Hope together, the way he's been acting the past couple of months would make me wish I could go back in time and tell myself it was gonna end up this way so I could just never get involved with him at all."

"Oh, Starr, you don't mean that," Langston blurted out. She knew Schuyler was it for Starr now, and that she and Cole were dead and buried, but she didn't think it invalidated what the two used to have.

"Probably not, but…everytime I remember those horrible things he said to Schuyler, I get so mad and disgusted that I can't even stand _looking_ at him," Starr spat, her voice trembling. "I can tell what he said hit Schuyler hard, and I hate him for that. I mean, he just-"

The door from the living room suddenly opened with a loud bang and Starr instantly went quiet as her little brother stormed into the room, though her anger didn't go away.

Jack stomped past them, suddenly shoving Langston's bag and everything else on the table to the floor, and both girls gaped at him, the outburst irritating Starr further.

"Jack! What do you think you're doing?!"

"What happened to you?" Langston echoed.

Jack, glowering and looking far too much like Todd for Starr's comfort, glared at them both, jabbing his finger at Langston.

"Your uncle? Is a horse's butt!"

He turned to storm up the stairs, but Starr shook her head, unable to take this any further.

"Jack, you wait a minute!" Starr snapped, her patience having been shattered by Cole, reaching out and grabbing his arm, yanking him back to her.

"Get off of me!" he yelled, flailing wildly.

"No, Jack, you're going to shut up and listen, for once!"

"Starr, he's just venting, he's upset," Langston jumped in nervously. "Maybe you should just-"

"No, Langston! We've been letting him use that as an excuse way too long, and I'm tired of him being so selfish! You are not the only one with problems, Jack! We have all tried being patient because we know this is hard for you, but I am sick of you being such an ungrateful little brat! John and Ray and everybody have been great to us, and you're going around acting like you hate the world just because you can't live with dad! Well guess what, Jack? I love dad too-"

"Bullshit!" he shouted. Starr's jaw dropped in shock, her eyes widening about to the size of dinner plates.

"Watch your language!" she shouted back. "And yes, I do. But he's not a good guy, Jack! Someday you're going to realize that, and you're going to be grateful mom kept you from being turned into him!"

"I don't have to listen to this, I'm not gonna let you try and brainwash me. Now get off!" he roared, slamming his foot onto hers for good measure. Starr cried out, releasing him, and Jack bolted up the stairs.

"Oh, you are such a brat, Jack!" Starr called after him in frustration, practically shaking with anger.

Langston stared at her with wide eyes; Starr usually had such patience with everyone, especially her family; to say that scene was jarring would be quite an understatement. It was understandable, though; Starr had a lot to be upset about right now, especially after what Cole had done, it was no wonder she'd snapped.

"Okay, um, Starr, how about we go to your room and talk there?" Langston suggested gently, grabbing her bag and guiding her friend up the stairs.

Starr calmed down as they went to her room, and just collapsed on her bed with a tired sigh once inside, weakly hugging her pillow; her own bed wasn't nearly as comfortable to her as Schuyler's these days.

"So, it seemed like Cole got to Schuyler?" Langston asked softly, deciding it was best to pretend the Jack incident just hadn't happened.

"Yeah," she said sadly. "The things he said just hit on Schuy's biggest insecurities. I hate this; I hate freaking out about what Schuyler's thinking after last night, I hate having to worry that Cole's going to do something that could more or less destroy us."

"Like what?" Langston asked in alarm. "I mean, I know he could get Mr. J fired, but if Schuyler's anything like you say, he'd stick by you even through that."

"I hope so, but that's not even what I'm thinking of- if my _dad_ finds out, we're pretty much dead."

Outside Starr's door, from where he'd been eavesdropping, Jack snickered quietly. His sister was such an idiot; he'd overheard her talking to that Schuyler dude before Langston ever had but never said anything because he just didn't care. Now, though, after she'd been such a bitch, it seemed only fair that he finally use this information.

Grinning broadly, Jack hurried off to call his dad.


	9. Chapter 9

"Zach Rosen- you were there, you raped my mom."

"Good guess!" Zach said brightly, wandering into the living room.

"I remember your face from when you were on trial," Cole said, following after him. "I memorized your face, Powell Lord's…you almost ruined my mom's life!"

"Oh, yeah? Well she actually did ruin mine, the bitch," Zach spat.

Cole instantly snapped at his words, lunging for the man, but Zach easily stepped aside, gripping the back of Cole's shirt and slamming his head into the wall beside them. Cole instantly hit the ground like a ton of bricks, unconscious, and Zach chuckled.

"Huh; looks like I can do whatever I want to Marty Saybrooke's kid," he mused, gazing around the room curiously. His eyes fell on the safe that Todd had left open, and Zach simply grinned when he noticed the gun. "Oh, Todd," he laughed, walking over and taking hold of it. "You just make it too easy."

Zach played with the gun, gazing at Cole's body while he thought, but eventually decided against it. He couldn't risk someone hearing something, someone unexpectedly showing up, and him getting put away for the kid's death so soon- not when Cole wasn't even the offspring he really wanted. Besides, there were other ways to hurt Marty- she seemed awfully attached to that guy who'd just married Todd's ex-, but Starr Manning was the _only_ thing Todd truly cared about, the one thing he could truly use against his old frat brother. He couldn't risk being caught before he made Todd suffer through her.

The phone rang a moment later, and Zach waited for the message curiously, absent-mindedly rolling Cole over so the dumbass didn't suffocate against the carpet or something.

"Dad? It's Jack. Listen, I'm sure Starr's going to throw another bitch fit if she catches me calling you so I have to be fast, but I just thought you might need to hear this- Starr's been messing around with her _teacher_ dad, Schuyler something, and I just heard her tell Langston that they _did it._ I mean, totally sick, right? You have to do something about that! I just thought you needed to know, because I'm worried. Hey, if the court finds out this happened with mom and McPain watching us, you can get custody back, right? You should tell someone! I gotta go, dad, I'll talk to you soon."

The call ended, and Zach laughed brightly in disbelief; it seemed daddy's little girl wasn't so innocent. Her teacher, really? She might be a fun one.

Zach knew he should probably take off now, until his plan was a little more solid, and he knew exactly what he wanted to do and when, but instead, he settled down on the couch to wait; he just had to see how Todd Manning took this news.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
Completely unaware of the drama building everywhere else, Schuyler was just sitting in his apartment, quietly grading homework when there was an unexpected knock at his door.

Not thinking there would be anything wrong (figuring if it was Cole again, there would be more pounding and threats), Schuyler just calmly walked to the door, pulled it open, and came face to face with Todd Manning.

Even as Schuyler's stomach instantaneously dropped, panic momentarily gripping his mind as he realized what his presence must mean, he managed to keep up a calm façade, just nodding in greeting.

"Todd Manning, right?" he asked politely, as if he didn't know. Todd smiled tightly.

"Yeah, that would be me."

Then suddenly, so quickly that Schuyler barely even saw him move, Todd's hand shot out, and in one swift motion, gripped Schuyler's neck and bashed him face first into the door with all his might. He roughly shoved him back into the apartment afterwards as Schuyler's vision exploded before his eyes, spinning and blurring as his head screamed with pain, and he collapsed to the ground. Todd calmly stepped into the apartment, kicking the door shut behind him, and walked over to Schuyler, crouching beside him as he gripped his collar, yanking him up so he had to look him in the eyes.

"Heard some really interesting things about you and Starr today, Joplin. Things that made me realize I should make it clear to you that nobody hurts my daughter and gets away with it."

"From Cole?" Schuyler spat in disgust, his head throbbing in protest as she spoke, his skull aching. "Whatever that kid told you isn't true."

"Doesn't matter where I heard it, just that I did, unfortunately for you."

"I didn't _hurt_ your daughter- I never would."

Todd's fist now slammed into Schuyler's face, knocking him back to the ground as Todd abruptly rose to his feet as if just being near Schuyler sickened him too much.

"I don't recall saying you could talk, you little pervert."

"You've got the wrong idea, Todd," Schuyler sighed, knowing it was a lost cause.

"Really? Want to explain to me why, apparently, several other students saw you two kissing, then?"

"That was a misunderstanding," he hissed, weakly pulling himself to a sitting position. "Starr had a little crush on me, and she kissed me once, before I made it very clear that I was her _teacher_ and it was never going to happen."

"Oh, so this is all my daughter's fault? You're blaming her?" Todd demanded.

"I am not _blaming_ Starr, I didn't say that!"

"And if that's the case, why did Starr's best friend say Starr personally told her you two are together?"

Schuyler slowly shut his eyes as he released a breath, knowing there was definitely no hope now.

"Tell me why…"

Todd trailed off as the doorknob turned, and suddenly, Starr walked into the room, her smile instantly fading as she gasped in shock over the sight of her father greeting her.

"Dad?!" she cried in a panic, not yet noticing Schuyler. "What are you- oh my God!" she shouted as she saw Schuyler on the floor, rushing past her dad.

Starr collapsed to her knees beside Schuyler, and her eyes instantly filled with horrified tears as she saw the damage her father had done, lightly brushing her fingers across his injured skin.

"Oh my God," she whimpered, her heart growing cold to see her worst fears were being realized. "I'm sorry, Schuyler," she whispered, no other words capable of encompassing everything she felt in this terrible moment. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, Starr," Schuyler tried to reassure her, even now, gently cupping her cheek.

"Get your hands off my daughter," Todd exploded, seeing red. Schuyler let go, but Starr kept her arms around him supportively, her eyes narrowing as she looked at her father- now just being seen as the man who had hurt Schuyler. "So, it's just a little crush on her part? That's why she just let herself in like she lives here? Joplin, give me one good reason why I shouldn't snap your neck," he hissed, not even acknowledging Starr's presence. Starr felt her anger truly boil over.

"How about the fact that you killed his mother?!" Starr screamed, jumping to her feet and standing in front of Schuyler protectively.

"What, is that what he's made you believe?" Todd snorted. "His mother killed herself."

"Yeah, because you _blackmailed her!_ You had her so upset that she thought _she_ was responsible for my baby's death! That's why she died!"

"You pushed her to it," Schuyler hissed in agreement as he clambered to his feet, being filled with a burning hatred for this man as he thought of everything he'd done to Starr, and what he'd done to his mom, the two people in his life that meant everything to him. Starr quickly wound her arm around his waist supportively, glaring at her father defiantly. "That's why she died. She was protecting me from you, because she didn't want anyone to find out that I was stealing drugs from the hospital because, yeah, yeah, I'm an addict!" he snapped.

"And a pervert- quite the double threat."

"What is _wrong_ with you?" Starr demanded, her voice trembling. "How does it not even affect you to know that you caused a good woman's death?" Todd continued to ignore his daughter.

"So you're just going to make excuses for your mother? Hell, can I throw in a theory about why she killed herself, if we're playing this game? I think she probably offed herself because she found out you like to swim in the kiddie pool."

"Oh my God, dad!" Starr shrieked in disgust as Schuyler took a deep breath, resisting the urge to fly off the handle.

"That is not what happened."

"I think so. This proves it," he said, nodding between the two of them. "You know, even if I don't kill you now like I should, you're going to prison. You know what they do to pedophiles in prison?"

"I'm seventeen, dad," Starr hissed. "That's legal here anyway."

"Oh, God, the court is just going to _love_ hearing this happened on your mother's watch," Todd noted to himself with a smirk.

"Please tell me you're kidding, dad. Please tell me you are not actually viewing this moment as another way to one-up mom, because I thought I made it clear when you took advantage of my mom being in a _coma_ to try and get custody of me that I don't appreciate being used in your sick games like that."

"Shut up and stay out of this, Starr," Todd snapped, finally acknowledging her.

"Don't talk to her like that!" Schuyler thundered, starting to step forward before Starr quickly pushed him back. "You are so full of shit, Todd. You claim you're here to protect Starr, because nobody hurts your daughter, but look at how _you_ treat her- think about all the ways that you've hurt her worse than anyone!"

"Don't you say a goddamn word to me about _my_ daughter, you perverted creep. And you need to stop talking about things you don't understand, Starr; he has taken _advantage_ of you, you can't see clearly anymore."

"Oh come on, dad, like I'm actually someone who can be taken advantage of!" Starr scoffed. "And he is exactly right! Just think about why you were blackmailing her in the first place!"

"Yeah, remind me what that plan was, Todd," Schuyler sneered. "Let's see if I remember it right; you were going to let Starr go on thinking that her baby was dead while you raised it with some woman who didn't even know who you were. You were just going to let your daughter keep on mourning and grieving forever while you took advantage of a woman you _raped_ all over again! Am I about right, is that close? You plotted to do all that, you caused my mother to kill herself, and you don't even feel bad, do you?"

"Oh, I think I see what this thing is really about now," Todd began, weaseling out of acknowledging anything either had just said. "This is your idea of an eye for an eye, isn't it? You think I killed your mom, and so you went after my daughter. When she walked into your classroom, you must have thought you won the lottery, huh?"

"No, Todd. Not everyone is as sick in the head as you," Schuyler replied furiously, while Starr just gazed at her father in stunned disbelief, the tears burning her eyes yet again. How could he even think like that? "You realize you are the only person messed up enough to come up with something like that, right? I would never do something like that, to _anyone_, but especially Starr."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I love her," Schuyler replied calmly. Starr whipped around to gaze at him in shock, unable to believe he'd say that in front of her dad, when the man had nearly broken his face just because of secondhand info from Cole.

"You are sick, you know that?" Todd thundered, seeming to snap over Schuyler's words, his usual eerie, calm control vanishing. "I don't give a shit what you've made my daughter believe, about what kind of guy you are, about what she feels for you, you are a fucking pervert who take advantage of a depressed, lonely young girl. But let me tell you something, Schuyler, nobody does this to _my_ daughter and lives to tell about it, nobody. She tell you what I did Cole? He's lucky he can still walk."

"Huh, and you wonder why your daughter has issues with men- at least that's the way you see it," he added, squeezing Starr's arm; she briefly nodded in understanding.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means considering that her DNA is half you, considering the way you raised her, and all the shit you've done to her and put her through, it's a goddamn miracle Starr turned out the way she has, you sick son of a bitch!" Schuyler shouted. "Is that clear enough for you?! Because I can sure as hell expand if you want me to!"

Todd started to move towards Schuyler, the look in his eyes murderously angry.

"Starr, get out," Todd hissed. "You don't need to see this."

"No," she breathed.

"Starr, I said get out."

"And I said no!" Starr fired back heatedly, planting herself directly in front of Schuyler. "Back off, dad! Considering you once shoved me down a flight of stairs, this might not deter you, but you're going to have to hurt _me_ if you want to do anything else to him!"

"Starr," Schuyler hissed behind her, sounding truly panicked over the possibility of Starr putting herself in harm's way to protect him, trying to shove her away. She refused to budge. "Starr, please, don't. Move, _now._"

"Listen to your little boyfriend here, Starr. His life is going to be completely destroyed within a couple of hours anyway, protecting him now is just delaying the inevitable."

"Dad, what the hell is wrong with you!" Starr screamed hysterically, her voice stunning Todd into freezing where he stood. Starr recalled her reaction every other time he'd hurt someone she cared for, begging him to stop; well, she was _done_ begging. "Do you not comprehend what a horrible human being you are, that you are an even worse father?! You pushed me down a flight of stairs when I was _pregnant_, and I tried to let it go, let you use your anger as an excuse. You tried to kill Cole, more than once, you beat up Markko, you even slapped Langston, but yet again, I excused all of that, looked the other way, let it go because I loved you! You planned to kidnap my baby, take her away from me forever, let me spend the rest of my life grieving her death! You blackmailed my doctor, tried to ruin the life of an innocent woman and her son, and you caused that woman's suicide, and even knowing all of that, I _protected you!_ I committed perjury for you, and could have been sent to jail! I didn't think it was possible to follow all of that, but hey, big surprise, you found a way to disappoint me even more! My mom was in a coma, and I was alone and scared and miserable, and what did you do? You took advantage of her condition to try and make me live with you, even when I said I didn't want to! And look at you! Even now, finding some way to tear me apart from my mother is at the front of your mind!

"You have done all that to me, and I always forgave you, and made excuses, and gave you another chance, and _this_ is how you repay me?" Starr hissed in disgust, her throat hoarse from all the infuriated screaming she had just done. "I repeat, what the hell is wrong with you?!"

"I am protecting you, Starr."

"How?! By beating up the guy whose mom you killed, trying to ruin his life even more than you already did?! And from what, exactly?! A guy who respects me, takes care of me, treats me well, and just happens to be a little older? A guy I love? Because guess what? I love Schuyler, dad!"

"You don't _love_ him, Starr!" Todd spat. "You're acting out, this is a phase! That's not even you talking, it's him!"

"How the hell would you know?! You know nothing about me, or us! _I love him_," she repeated firmly. "He is the only person that I have ever felt like understands me, and I feel _safe_ with him, and I'm…I'm finally really, _really_ happy, _because_ of him! And I swear to God, dad, if you destroy Schuyler, or hurt him any further… if you cause him to leave me and I lose the only really great thing I've ever had, you can go to _Hell_ as far as I'm concerned! I swear to God, I will hate you _forever_; you will be as good as dead to me," she spat, her voice quieter than ever, but ringing with sincerity, and a furious passion to it; her obvious anger was so overwhelming, it was almost frightening. "I mean that this time. I don't care if Tea comes around again, crying and telling me you tried to kill yourself because of me- I won't even blink.. Do what you will, but I want you to be clear on the consequences."

The room was deathly still, the silence somehow deafening, as father and daughter simply stared each other down. Starr could read nothing off of her dad, and just hoped the fact that he hadn't laughed, yelled at her, snapped, done _something_, was a good sign.

After what felt like an eternity, Todd shot Schuyler one more look of pure venom before slowly backing away, looking as though resisting the urge to kill Schuyler right then and there was physically painful.

"I'll give you one choice in this matter, Starr," Todd said quietly as he reached the door. "You end this tonight, and I don't kill him. It ends here, and we can pretend it didn't happen. Take it or leave it." He didn't wait for a response, turning and opening the door before pausing a moment, turning back to glare at Schuyler once more. "I strongly suggest that you don't let there be a next time, Joplin."

Todd left, his quiet steps and the soft shutting of the door somehow more intimidating than if he had shouted and slammed it.

Schuyler and Starr both stood in complete silence for a moment, the tension slowly evaporating from the room with Todd's absence. Schuyler gave a slight sigh of relief; while that had been beyond horrible, he had to consider the fact that he didn't need an ambulance, that the cops weren't breaking down his door, kind of a win.

"Starr?" he asked softly, lightly placing his hand on her back when he noticed that the girl had yet to move, and was just staring into space with a blank expression. She jumped as he placed his hand on her, finally looking at him, and to Schuyler's surprise, Starr's face suddenly crumpled and she burst into tears.

"Oh my God, Schuyler, I am so sorry!" she wailed, wringing her hands as she struggled to breathe around her sobs. "I'm so so so sorry!"

"Starr," Schuyler began in shock, grabbing her shoulders and gently rubbing his hands up and down her skin, desperately trying to calm her down.

"I hate him so much! I swear, I will not let him do this to you ever again, Schuyler, and I won't let him do a thing to your career," she rambled, taking in short gasps of air.

"Starr, please-"

"If he does say something, I'm telling them I became obsessed with you, that I've been stalking you and you've been trying to keep me away, that the only reason you didn't transfer me out of your class or tell someone is because you were afraid I'd snap and hurt myself or something- oh, that could work! I can make Langston tell them I only told her we were together because I was having delusions, I can convince them that-"

Starr was suddenly cut off by Schuyler gently cupping her head in his hands and pressing his lips to hers- briefly, albeit, since she already seemed to be on the verge of hyperventilating, but long enough to silence her.

"Starr, calm down, please, breathe," he instructed gently once he let go. She nodded, dazed, taking a deep, trembling breath. "Now, first of all- do you honestly think I'd let you do that?"

No, she didn't, that was precisely the problem; Schuyler would probably do something truly stupid like back up her dad's story and say he took advantage of her in some attempt to protect her reputation from being destroyed, which would be truly pointless because if he ever did that she would _kill_ him and spend the rest of her life in jail anyway.

"Everything is okay, Starr."

"What the hell are you talking about?!" she shrieked before she could stop herself. "Look at what he did to you!"

"I'm fine- I'm _fine_ Starr," he repeated when she snorted. "That was nothing. We're both okay."

"Okay, physically, but what if he tells the school?" she blubbered, giving up on trying to wipe away the tears at this rate. "Because I can't just end this, it's selfish but I _can't_- unless you want me to," she added hesitantly. Schuyler looked stunned.

"What? God, no, Starr, of course not." She briefly smiled through her tears, but it quickly disappeared.

"Well, if I can't somehow make him believe I did, he's going to run to the school, and you're going to lose your job!"

"Then it happens," Schuyler said simply, shrugging. "And everything will _still_ be okay. I can handle anything he might do as long as I still have you, Starr, I mean that."

She looked at him dubiously, still shaking with sobs, and Schuyler pulled her body tight to his, running his fingers through her hair until his hands came around to cradles her head.

"Starr, I want you to listen to me," he murmured gently but firmly. "What you said to your dad, about you losing me if he tries to destroy me? Never going to happen. I want you to know, even if your dad does go through with this, you won't have lost me; I don't care what it means will happen to me, I won't leave you, not ever again- not as long as you still want me around."

"What?" she asked softly, genuinely startled.

"Starr, I could never bear to hurt you again, or more selfishly, be away from you, I just couldn't do it."

"If I ruined your career you wouldn't…hate me?"

"_No,_ not for a second, not even close. I mean it when I say I love you, Starr, I need you to believe that. I love you," he repeated firmly. "You're it for me. Whatever else may happen doesn't matter."

That finally did the trick; the tears stopped and Starr managed to breathe, grinning warmly as she wound her arms around his neck, pulling him down and kissing him. Schuyler held her securely, kissing her fears away, and Starr almost sighed against his lips in relief; if she always had him, always had this, she could handle whatever came along too.

Schuyler only released her when air became a need and did not loosen his grip on her one bit. Starr just moved her arms to his waist and hugged him tightly, laying her head against his chest and listening to the soothing sound of his heartbeat as she regained her breath.

She wasn't sure how long they stayed locked in that embrace, holding each other without saying a word, until they finally pulled away and she glanced at the clock, her eyes widening with surprise when she saw how much time had passed since she'd arrived.

"Crap. I hate to say this, but I should probably go," Starr said reluctantly. "Last thing we need right now is my dad coming back and finding me still here. I'll call you the second I get home, okay?"

"Please do," he sighed, still worried about her. He knew Starr loved him, but seeing just how unhinged she'd become over the thought of something happening to him, or losing him, had unnerved him; hypocritically, he knew, since his own feelings on the thought of something happening to Starr were even worse, but he couldn't control it.

Eyes flickering to his injuries again, guilt weighing heavily in them, Starr managed a weak smile and kissed him once more.

"I love you so much," she said.

"You have no idea how much I love you, Starr."

"I think I'm starting to get the picture," she laughed sadly, lighting brushing her fingers across his bruising skin.

Starr left after one more kiss, and Schuyler watched her go with a heavy heart, suppressing the urge to call her back the moment the door shut.


	10. Chapter 10

Starr walked into Dorian's quietly, her energy all having been zapped right out of her by the terrible last two days. As she trudged upstairs, Starr felt a twist of guilt when she saw Jack's door, knowing it had been wrong of her to take her irritation out on her little brother.

All Starr wanted to do now was collapse into bed and talk to Schuyler until she fell asleep, but she knew this was the right thing to do, so she reluctantly walked to Jack's door, knocking softly, and it swung open a second later.

"Oh, it's you," he greeted shortly. "What do you want to yell at me about now?"

Langston must have heard him, because she poked her head out her door a moment later, and quickly walked over to stand by her friend supportively.

"No yelling, I'm just here to apologize," Starr sighed. Jack didn't look like he was buying it. "I really am sorry for the way I blew up, Jack. I still think you need to make a little more effort, and you really need accept the truth about dad," she spat bitterly as she thought of what she and Schuyler had just gone through. Jack bristled in response to that. "But the things I said were mean and out of line, and I'm sorry."

"Right," Jack snorted, flashing her a sarcastic smile. "Well, then, I guess I'm sorry too- especially for calling dad and telling him about that Schuyler dude, I hope that's not going to cause any problems for you."

"You what?!" Starr shrieked, her energy rushing back in a heartbeat. Langston gasped in horror. "When was this?!"

"I don't know, an hour ago?" he guessed irritably, though he seemed pleased by the panic he'd caused her.

"Oh my god," Starr moaned- so that hadn't even been what her dad was at Schuyler's for, Jack had left the message _after_ Todd had already left to confront Schuy. Oh, no- that meant her dad was leaving Schuyler's in that furious state he'd been to go home, and was going to be greeted by whatever it was Jack had left on his machine. "Jack, what did you say?!"

"I guess you'll find out," Jack said with a smirk, stepping back to slam his door shut.

Starr caught it with her palm and threw it open; it hit the wall with a loud bang, and Jack looked startled, thrown off his guard.

"Jack; _what-did-you-say?_"

"I don't know," he mumbled uncomfortably, shrinking under her infuriated gaze. "I said you guys were messing around or whatever…that you told Langston you, um…did it."

"Oh my God!" Langston shrieked with wide eyes, instantly comprehending just how freaking bad this was.

With a horrified intake of breath, Starr just slowly shook her head, her ears ringing with anger and panic.

"You have no idea what you just did, Jack," Starr hissed, spinning on her heel and rushing down the stairs.

"Starr, wait!" Langston cried, quickly following. She reached the bottom just as Starr was grabbing her bag and heading for the door. "Starr, what are you going to do?"

"If my dad hears that, especially after what just happened, he will literally kill Schuyler, Langston, I have to try and stop him from finding out! I think I can beat my dad home- he'll probably stop somewhere to get a drink or something, at least that's what I'm hoping. If I can get there first, I can erase the message before he ever hears it, and everything will be okay, Schuyler won't get killed."

"Okay, I'm coming with you."

"No, I should do this alone," Starr sighed. Langston watched her nervously.

"Okay, just, be careful! And good luck!"

"Thanks!" Starr said quickly, running out the door.

Langston frantically raised her hand to her mouth, chewing her nails as she paced back and forth, unsure of what to do now; right now the only thing coming to mind was 'kill Jack' which didn't seem very smart, so she remained downstairs, hoping Starr would call any moment to say she'd been successful.

After what felt like an eternity but had really only been about ten minutes, Langston broke; she couldn't bear to just sit here and _wait_, not when it seemed like everything was falling apart right in front of her eyes, and she quickly fished out her phone, and the list of school numbers from her notebook, finding Mr. J's.

"Hello?" he answered, sounding tense.

"Hi, um, Mr. Jo-…Schuyler," she corrected, considering this was a personal call.

"Langston?" Schuyler asked, sounding surprised. "What's going on, is everything okay?"

"Uh…I don't really know," she squeaked. "Kind of why I'm calling, actually. See, Starr came home from your place about fifteen minutes ago, and she went to apologize to Jack for a fight they had earlier, and he ended up spilling that earlier, he called Starr's dad as revenge and said some, um…_stuff_ about you too that will be very upsetting to him, let's just say that."

"Oh, God," Schuyler groaned in dread. "Langston, where's Starr?"

"Uh…sheleftsoshecandeletethemessagebeforehehearsit!" Langston said in a rush.

"She _what?_"

"She left so she can delete the message before he hears it!"

"No, I heard you," he said impatiently. "Did she go by herself?"

"Yeah."

"Damn it," Schuyler swore frantically.

He was instantly sent into far more of a panic than he'd been in when Todd had confronted him alone in his room. Starr was risking being alone with Todd when he heard that message- Todd, whom Schuyler had once believed without a moment of doubt had been the one to hit Starr when she'd shown up at his classroom injured. Todd, who was known for having trouble with his anger. Todd, who had shoved her down a flight of stairs when she'd been defending a _teenage_ boy from him. _Shit._

"I'm going over there- think I can catch her?"

"Yeah, totally," Langston reassured him.

"If Todd does anything…" Schuyler muttered to himself as he grabbed his keys, forgetting he was even on the phone.

"Oh, Mr. Jop- Schuyler; he has issues, I know, but I don't think he'd ever hurt _Starr._"

"Well, I don't trust that enough to chance it. Thanks for calling me, Langston."

"Of course."

He hung up, and Langston sighed, her heart heavy as she hung up, hoping everything was going to turn out okay for her best friend.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
"Dad!" Starr shouted as she ran into his house, praying she'd gotten there in time. "Dad, are you here?"

There was no response, and Starr felt a flicker of hope, rushing into the living room.

"Twinkle twinkle, little Starr."

Starr spun around in surprise, frowning deeply as she saw the unfamiliar man who had spoken. He smiled at her, but the friendly gesture made her feel a strange hint of discomfort.

"What did you just call me?"

"Starr- that's your name, right?" he asked, that weird smile still on his face.

"Um, yeah. Who are you, what are you doing here? How do you know my name?"

"Oh, I'm a friend of your dad's."

"And where is he?" Starr asked urgently, her eyes wide.

"He said he had something to take care of earlier, he told me I should just wait for him here." Starr sighed; that something must have been Schuyler.

"He said you could wait here alone?" she asked in surprise.

"Oh, yeah, he trusts me. We go way back; I'm practically like his brother."

"You do look a little familiar," she noted, tilting her head curiously. "What's your name?"

"It's Carl, Carl Swift; it's _very_ nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you too, Carl," Starr replied tightly, feeling another twist of discomfort when he shook her hand.

"You know, I've heard a lot about you," he informed her, removing his hat. "I know how much you mean to your dad. Speaking of- you gonna hang out and wait for him?"

"Oh, _no_, I actually didn't come to see him," Starr said, her focus back on her mission as she hurried to the phone. She paused, something occurring to her as she reached the machine. "Did you, um, hear the message my brother left?"

"I don't remember hearing a message."

"Oh, good," she sighed, hitting the play button and then hitting erase the moment she heard Jack's voice. The answering machine confirmed it was deleted, and Starr felt a rush of relief until she turned around and saw Carl watching her curiously.

"Afraid that was gonna get you in trouble?"

"It's not me I'm worried about," she replied quickly. "But it doesn't matter now, thankfully." Starr froze, her brow furrowing as she thought of something. "Oh- you're going to tell him I did that, aren't you?"

"Hey, that is none of my business, okay? As far as I'm concerned, I didn't see it," he offered kindly, flashing her a quick wink.

"Oh, thank you," Starr said, shaking her head; she shouldn't even have to be doing this, why was her dad so irrational? "This is only happening anyway because he sees me as this little girl still, and I'm not."

"Well, anyone can see that, Starr. Anyone," he stressed, his eyes flickering over her.

What had been a small twist of discomfort was now a full blown, screaming warning signal; this was weird, he shouldn't be saying that, or looking at her like that.

"Let me guess; your dad's giving you a hard time about some boy."

"Um, not a boy, actually, older guy," Starr told him, hoping hearing she had a boyfriend would send some kind of warning, back off signal.

"A man," Carl said, looking too interested in this.

"Yeah, it's just…you know what? You shouldn't have to hear any of this, you don't even know me."

"You're right, I don't. But maybe I can give you an impartial perspective. I mean, when I look at you, I don't see a child."

"Oh," she replied uncomfortably, trying to sound interested. She was too nervous around him to want to risk upsetting him. "How old do you think I look, anyway?

"Like a woman, like a beautiful young woman," he said warmly. Starr took a deep breath; she was overreacting, right? He was just being polite, right? That wasn't as weird as she thought it was, _right?_ "Which is why your father is so upset."

"What do you mean?"

"You know, you're daddy's little girl, he doesn't want to share you!"

"You think that's it?"

"Oh, I know it, especially with his history."

"What are you saying?"

"Well, you know, his issues with women are different than most guys."

"So, how do you know my dad again?" Starr asked, hesitantly taking a step back; what did he know about her dad's history?

"Oh, from when we were young."

"How young?"

"Not much older than you are now," Carl said, standing from the seat he'd taken and walking towards her. "Man, if you had been around then…"

"Why are you saying all of these things?" Starr blurted out, fear griping her.

"What? I thought you wanted to know what I thought of you," he said with a leer that made her shiver and want to cover up even though she already had a jacket on. "You're _beautiful_- a beautiful woman."

"You know what, I'm gonna go now," Starr said quickly, turning to get the hell out of there as her heart pounded wildly in her chest. Oh, God, why hadn't she left the second she erased the message?

"Hey," Carl said, his voice suddenly lower, more intimidating, as he moved to cut her off. "Don't you want to show your dad you're not a little girl?"

"Who the hell are you?" a furious voice suddenly demanded from near the front door.

Starr and Carl both quickly whipped around to see who had spoken, and Starr nearly crumpled with relief when she saw Schuyler, not caring how he'd known she was here, only that he'd shown up. And, if the absolutely infuriated look he was throwing Carl was any indication, that he'd heard what the man had said.

Schuyler quickly crossed the room, reaching them in no time, and hovered by Starr protectively, winding his arm around her waist and pulling her tightly to him. Starr gripped him just as tightly, feeling a rush of gratitude.

Schuyler stared the man down with a look that could kill, currently feeling like his hold on Starr was the only thing keeping him from actually doing it. Who the hell was this guy, and what the _fuck_ did he think he was doing talking to Starr like that, looking at her like that?

"I'm Carl Swift," he introduced himself pleasantly, like he hadn't just hit on Starr and like Schuyler didn't look like he wanted to strangle him.

"Great- Carl, wanna tell me why the hell you were talking to my girlfriend like that?" he asked, voice hot with anger.

"Girlfriend?" Carl repeated, suddenly chuckling like he knew a secret. "Oh. _Oh._ So, you must be the teacher, huh?"

"I thought you didn't hear the message," Starr choked out. He shrugged.

"I lied. Hey, how do you think I knew that you are definitely not a little girl anymore?" he questioned, slowly smirking as he looked her up and down again.

Much to her shock, Schuyler suddenly seemed to snap and he started to step forward, fists clenched, but Starr quickly yanked him back, just as yet another voice seemed to appear from nowhere.

"Get away from him! That's Zach Rosen, he raped my mom!"

Starr and Schuyler both startled, looking over to see Cole pulling himself up from behind the couch, rubbing his head.

"Cole?" Starr asked faintly. "What's-"

"Cole, get over here, now," Schuyler, who seemed to figure out the situation faster than her, ordered shortly, grasping Starr even more firmly. Cole quickly did as he was told, and Schuyler pulled Starr towards the door, yanking Cole's arm to make sure he followed. "We're leaving," he snapped over his shoulder.

"What's going on?!" Starr cried. "Cole, what did he do to you?!"

"Starr, just keep walking."

"Oh my God," Starr whimpered to herself, beginning to understand.

"Hey, Starr, it's fine, I've got you," Schuyler murmured comfortingly. "It's okay, he can't hurt you."

"Let's just go," Cole hissed anxiously. "Quickly, before-"

"Not so fast!" Zach suddenly roared.

All feeling a sense of dread, the trio turned to discover Zach staring after them with an expression of pure rage, pointing a gun directly at them.


	11. Chapter 11

"Let's all just take a seat, okay?! Nobody's going anywhere!"" Zach shouted, still waving the gun around.

Cole just silently gazed at the man with a look that could kill, while Starr was practically hyperventilating, clutching Schuyler's shoulder so roughly she couldn't believe she wasn't drawing blood, as Schuyler himself calmly held up his hands, trying to placate Zach.

"Okay, calm down, everything's fine," he began, in the same soothing tone he used with the out of control addicts at the center. "Look, there's no reason to keep us here, we have nothing against you."

"Oh, _really?_ You were just threatening me over your little girlfriend here, he's shouting about how I raped his mom, and I'm supposed to believe none of you have a problem with me?"

"Look, the thing with Marty was a really long time ago," Starr spoke up softly from behind her boyfriend. Cole threw her an agitated glance, forcing himself to bite his tongue. He knew what Starr was doing was smart, but it was his gut, visceral reaction to flip out over his mother. "It doesn't matter anymore, and what happened just now was nothing. Everything's cool now."

"Oh, please," Zach snorted dismissively. "The second you drive away you call the cops, I'm not stupid. You three, get the hell in the living room, now."

Starr instantly nudged both boys forward, quickly deciding it was best not to test Zach right now. In the living room, Zach gave Cole a hard push into the arm chair, and motioned for her and Schuyler to take a seat on the couch, which they quickly did. Starr struggled to breathe, panic setting in greater than ever, and Schuyler soothingly stroked her hair.

"Hey, you two, phones," Zach snapped, holding out his hand to them.

They both handed over their cells. Starr realized a moment later he hadn't asked for Cole's, and was unsure if he had already taken it before she came along or if he'd just forgotten. She glanced over at Cole, widening her eyes and nodding slightly to the phones, and Cole gave a short nod back in understanding.

"Huh, guess if anyone really wanted to see what's going on with you two, all they'd need to do is check your phones," Zach noted as he scrolled through both of their call logs, appearing amused by how often each other's names came up. "I'm surprised you lovebirds are so quiet right now; judging from this, looks like you hardly ever shut up. Sucks for you, kid, huh?" Zach asked Cole, chuckling. "Gotta sting when you're still in love with your ex and she moves on to the _teacher._"

"Don't try to sympathize with me," Cole snapped.

"Suit yourself," Zach muttered, shrugging, tossing the phones on the table and sitting down on it himself, before turning to Schuyler with a smirk. "So, when I heard Starr's little brother's hilarious message, I never thought I'd actually get to meet the teacher Starr's been 'messing around' with. You like swimming in the kiddie pool, Schuyler?" he sneered. "You know, I'm pretty sure there are laws about this kind of thing; I don't know why everyone here is judging _me_, I don' see what I've done that's so much worse than screwing around with a student."

Schuyler's eyes just bore into him, gripping the arm of the couch as he refused to say a word, and Zach turned to Starr, determined to get a reaction from _someone._

"So, you like older guys, Starr? What is it, daddy issues? You like being protected by a big strong man?"

"Don't talk to her," Schuyler hissed, drawing his arm around Starr's shoulders protectively and pulling her tighter to him. Starr wrapped her own arms around his waist, clinging to him. Zach emitted that creepy laugh again.

"Looks like that's it. You know, _I'm_ an older guy, Starr, I don't know why you seem so opposed to-"

"What the hell did I just say, you so-"

"What do you even want?" Starr interrupted Schuyler's tirade quickly, before he could upset Zach, gripping the back of his shirt firmly just for safe measure since he looked ready to punch Zach at any moment.

"What do I want?" he demanded darkly. "How about everything your entitled ass of a father got that I didn't?"

"Okay, okay, um…we can help you!" Starr tried desperately. "We can go ask my dad for help!"

"Nope; see, I already tried that, and your dad told me to go to Hell, so now we have to do this the hard way."

If it was even _possible_, Schuyler was pretty sure he hated Todd Manning more than ever before. He _knew_ Zach was here, and he hadn't told anyone? It somehow hadn't occurred to him that Zach might turn to his family for revenge? And now Starr was in this situation because of that bastard…and himself. God, what would have happened if Langston hadn't called him? Schuyler felt a rush of dread at the thought and forced it away, knowing he was going to snap and lunge at Zach at any moment if he kept thinking like that.

"But we can try again, please!" Starr begged.

"No!" Zach shouted, rising to his feet. Starr shrank back nervously, and Schuyler just continued stroking her hair, lightly resting his chin on top of her head so she was completely wrapped in his embrace. "I'm done asking for anything. Hey, Schuyler, you're a teacher, you're a smart guy, maybe you can explain this to me- how come he got a pardon and I got to rot in prison? How come he gets rich, gets a family, and I get nothing? _I_ don't have money, or a big house in the woods- or a beautiful daughter," he added, leering at Starr. Schuyler bit his tongue, his blood boiling.

Starr glanced over to Cole, and quickly held back a gasp as she noticed him holding his arm behind his back in a strange way- he had to be calling someone. Starr quickly returned her attention to Zach, trying to think of some way to keep his off of Cole.

"And what do you want now?" she asked him bravely.

"All of it," Zach replied calmly.

"Look, if you want money, Starr can get it," Schuyler began, attempting to appease him. "You seem to realize Starr is the most important thing to Todd, so you know he would give her anything, all she has to do is ask."

"Yeah," Starr backed him up quickly. "Just give me a number, and I promise it'll be yours."

"Look, I'm not interested in begging for a handout from your dad anymore, it's too late for that."

"Alright, Rosen, we get it," Cole snapped. Starr frantically shot him a nervous glance- she hoped he knew what he was doing. "You hate Todd. But there's no point in keeping me and Starr hostage, and Schuyler's not even involved in this. Have you really thought this through? I mean, what happens when Todd comes home?"

Zach rolled his eyes, beginning to pace behind the seating area.

"Do you honestly think I- _hey_!" Zach suddenly shouted furiously, spotting the phone in Cole's hand from his new viewpoint. He roughly tore it from his hands, stalking across the room. "Dumb fucking mistake, kid!"

"Oh my God," Starr whimpered, burying her head in her hands, horrified by this turn of events.

"It's okay, Starr, it's fine," Schuyler murmured in her ear reassuringly as he kept a careful eye on Zach. "I'm not going to let him hurt you, I _promise_." Starr took a deep breath and nodded, holding one of his hands in hers tightly; she believed that.

"Listen up," Zach barked into the phone. "I don't know who the hell you are or why Mr. Thornhart here called you, but he just screwed up big time. You tell the cops anything, and all three of them are dead before they can storm the front door, got it? Dead!"

Zach disconnected, pocketing the phone as he paced around with angry energy, and abruptly flung one of Todd's expensive looking vases at the wall to release it, shattering the glass to pieces; Starr reflexively shrieked, jumping, and buried her head against Schuyler's shoulder.

"As I was saying before Cole here so rudely interrupted, I'm not nearly as interested in the money anymore as I am in having Marty's son and Todd's daughter," he mused, looking them both over. "Two birds, one stone. The perv is just a bonus- hell, who knows, Todd might actually have a change of heart and help me out if I do him a favor by killing you."

"Oh, God!" Starr choked out in a panic, digging her fingers into Schuyler's shirt as tears of panic blurred her vision. "Zach, please, don't!"

"Starr, shh, it's okay," Schuyler whispered, not wanting Zach's attention on her anymore than it already was. He gently cupped her cheek and brushed at her tears, quickly pressing a reassuring kiss to her hair as he cradled her to his chest, and Starr cuddled into his secure embrace, though she was unable to help resenting slightly how concerned Schuyler seemed for her, at the expense of his own safety.

"Oh, calm down, twinkle, I haven't decided what for sure what I'm doing yet. I could always be persuaded," he told her with a wink.

"Zach, you have to look at this logically," Schuyler interjected, digging his nails into his palms to keep from saying what he really wanted to this bastard. If he leered at Starr one more time, he was seriously going to lose it. "You haven't done anything they can nail you for yet, you're not in any trouble. But people know we're here now, and they know you're holding us hostage, so if you-"

"The only one who knows anything is Cole's little friend on the phone!" Zach shouted, growing unhinged as he wildly waved the gun around. "And I already told him, he calls the cops, and you all die! I have everything under control, okay?!"

"Okay, okay," Schuyler replied simply, in that same calming tone.

Zach began to pace some more, muttering quietly to himself, and Starr released a shuddering breath, raising her head from Schuyler's chest to glance at Cole so she could make sure he was doing okay. To her surprise, he had a look of shame on his face, and quickly avoided her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Starr," he said quietly. She realized a moment later he meant for getting caught with the phone, and quickly shook her head, forcing a smile onto her features; it was so difficult to do at this moment that it almost hurt.

"Not your fault, Cole," she whispered back simply. "That was really brave of you, okay? And you _did_ let someone know, that's all that really-"

"What the hell are you yammering about?" Zach demanded, whipping around.

"Nothing!" Starr squeaked quickly.

"Good, keep it that way." He wandered off into the living room, peering anxiously out a window.

"Someone there?" Schuyler asked evenly.

"No, but I'm sure there's going to be soon enough, thanks to Cole here," he spat, shaking his head. "I am not going back."

"You don't have to! You can just sneak out the back door and get away before anyone shows up!" Starr suggested hopefully. Zach snorted.

"What, are you _stupid_? I'm not leaving until I get what I came here for!"

"And what's that? Because you don't seem too clear on that to me, Zach," Schuyler interjected. Zach smiled calmly now.

"Oh, I know what I came here for. Payback."

"What kind of payback do you want?" Starr blurted out, regretting it when he threw her another one of those creepy looks in response, slowly walking back over to them.

"You afraid of me, twinkle?"

"Don't call her that," Schuyler snapped darkly.

"Oh, I think she likes it. Right, twinkle? Hey, just because he's your teacher doesn't mean he gets to control you, don't let him speak for you- you're a mature woman now, remember?" Starr just looked away from him in disgust, trying to focus on the feel of Schuyler's arms around her instead of the weight of Zach's stare. "I was in college- premed, you know that? I was going to be somebody. But then I let your miserable bastard of a father talk me into something stupid- ruined all that for me."

"Something _stupid?_!" Starr exploded in disbelief, anger overriding her fear before she even realized what she was doing. "Try something _evil!_ I'm so sick of hearing about _your_ life being ruined- what about Cole's mom?! What you did was _disgusting_, and you deserve what you got!"

"She's right!" Schuyler instantly jumped in as the other man glowered- if Zach was going to get pissed at anyone, it needed to be him. "Going back to jail is the least of what you deserve; Todd didn't hold a gun to your head, you _chose_ to rape an innocent woman, and you can't even admit what you did. You're a disgusting excuse for a human being, you know that?"

"_Wow_; am I seriously getting a lecture on wrong and right from a pedophile?" Zach laughed. "_Schuyler_, as long as you're sitting here with your hands all over the underage student you're 'messing around' with, you don't really have much room to make moral judgments about me, don't you think? And, you know what, twinkle? If you want to talk about that night with Marty, let's have a little q and a, see how much you all actually know. Does your dad talk about it much?"

"Shut your mouth," Cole hissed through clenched teeth, furiously gripping the arms of his chair to keep himself sitting, when all he really wanted to do was tear Zach's throat out for daring to so much as mention his mother.

"Careful- I'm the one with the gun," Zach warned him.

"And I'm the one who knows what you did to my mother!" Cole thundered, leaping from his chair before he could stop himself.

"Cole!" Starr shrieked frantically as Schuyler also jumped to his feet, ready to help Cole.

"Everybody calm down!" Zach roared, pointing the gun at Starr as he gave Cole a firm shove back into the seat. Schuyler instantly sat back down, all but pulling Starr into his lap, appearing terrified for the first time, the sight of Zach aiming the gun at Starr finally breaking the calm he'd managed to hang on to longer than the other two. "You are a real pain in my ass, you know that, kid?" Zach spat.

He walked over to Todd's desk, impatiently rummaging around for a moment until he found what he was looking for- a roll of duct tape. He quickly walked back over to Cole and had the boy's feet and hands taped tightly to the wood in no time, preventing him from moving so much as an inch away from the chair; after pausing for a moment, mulling it over, he chuckled to himself and taped Cole's mouth as well.

"Zach, I really don't think that's necessary," Schuyler sighed, already knowing it was pointless. He threw Cole a helpless, apologetic look, and Cole just shook his head.

"Well, I do, so shut the fuck up," he grumbled, turning and jabbing his finger at them. "You two watch yourselves, or this is you next, got it? Now, it's time for us…" Zach trailed off, cocking his head curiously. Suddenly, still holding the roll of tape and the gun in one hand, he stood up, walking back to the front window and glancing out again, but this time, they didn't have to ask what was going on. "_Shit_! Someone's pulling up at the end of the road, it must that son of a bitch Cole called! I'm not going back," he said again; this time, though, his voice wasn't firm, but panicked and unnerved. "I cannot fucking go back to the place, I won't! Both of you up, now," he ordered, storming back over to them.

Starr and Schuyler immediately scrambled to their feet, still holding onto each other for dear life; Schuyler gently pulled Starr back so she was shielded behind him.

"I don't have time to screw around anymore," Zach snapped. "You two, we're going upstairs."

He herded the couple so that they were both walking in front of him side by side, leaving Cole tied to the chair where he could only watch. He could only watch as Zach lowered the gun to his side, carefully turning it so the muzzle was facing behind him, as he gripped it a little tighter. He could only emit a short, muffled shout of warning that came too late as Zach suddenly reared back, and then slammed the butt of the gun to the back of Schuyler's head, the weapon connecting with a sickening crack.

"_Schuyler_!" Starr screamed hysterically as he instantly collapsed face first to the floor, out cold.

Zach quickly wrapped an arm around her waist, clutching her to his chest tightly as he clamped a hand over her mouth, but Starr's attention was so focused on the horrific sight of her inert boyfriend, a trail of blood coming from the back of his skull, that she didn't even notice.

"Sorry, twinkle, your boyfriend just got uninvited from our little party- teachers always ruin the fun anyway, don't you think?" Zach hissed, his breath warm against her ear; Starr shuddered, feeling sick to her stomach as tears overwhelmed her and she sobbed against Zach's hand, unable to tear her eyes from Schuyler's unmoving form. "Let's go."

Zach started to drag Starr off towards the living room, and she realized with a rush of terror that meant the _stairs_, which could only mean something she could not even allow herself to think about it. Starr instantly flung herself back, desperately fighting against his firm grip on her, now vaguely aware of Cole yelling at Zach against the gag, to no use; his words were all muffled and drowned out.

"Will you stop?!" Zach spat, nervously glancing to the front door, as his hold on her still did not loosen. "I really don't want to have to hurt you, twinkle."

Starr ignored him, furiously nailing him in the shin as hard as she could- it worked, and Zach cried out in pain, momentarily letting go. Starr turned to run for the front door, taking a breath to prepare to scream as loudly as possible, but she had only gotten a few steps away when Zach recovered, lunged and caught her arm, and whipped her back around to him, striking her in the face with his fist. Starr nearly doubled over from the force, feeling like the wind had been knocked out of her, but Zach had grown enraged from her attempt to escape, and wasn't done yet; he suddenly seized one of her father's heavy, leatherbound books from the nearest table and smacked her hard across the face with it, resisting the urge to just use the gun again- he didn't want her unconscious yet, there was no fun in that.

Starr instantly gave up the fight, the tremendous force from the blow leaving her completely dazed and confused, feeling like her skull had just been cracked in two as her vision spun and her ears rang, a wave of nausea twisting her stomach.

With Starr now limp in his arms, Zach easily tugged her off, ignoring the now completely hysterical Cole, struggling wildly against his bonds.

Zach and Starr disappeared up the stairs within moments, and a door upstairs slammed shut a second later, as Cole continued to yell against the tape, his throat rapidly growing hoarse. John had to be here by now, but apparently not in time to hear Starr's scream; shit, he was probably just milling around outside, trying to figure out some way to sneak into the house to keep from upsetting Zach, having no idea that the time for stealth had long since passed.


	12. Chapter 12

Cole furiously tried to free himself again, knowing he had to get some signal to John that he needed to get the hell in here, _now_, but it was pointless- he could not make a sound. Just like he had with the phone, he was failing Starr all over again. Suddenly across the room, he heard Schuyler groan slightly, though he remained immobile, and Cole desperately hoped he was waking up.

The next few minutes were absolutely agonizing for Cole; he could now hear both John and his mother outside, arguing over the best way into the house, whether or not they should call Zach, if they should figure out a way to get the police here first, and Cole desperately wished his mom hadn't come; he knew John was holding back out of his worry for her, he would have kicked that damn door in by now if he was alone.

"What the hell is going on here?" Much to his disbelief, Cole actually felt a wave of relief when he heard Todd Manning's irritated voice a minute later.

"Zach Rosen has both of your kids, and Starr's biology teacher, he's holding them hostage- Cole called my phone earlier and I heard a second of what's going on in there. He said if we contact the cops, they're all dead. We need to- what are you doing, Manning?"

"I'm calling Rosen! He's got Cole's phone? Good, what's the number?"

"You're just going to set him off!"

"Marty, my daughter is in there with a convicted..."

"So is my son! John will get them out of there, but we have to work together!"

"Look, I guarantee you it's me he wants; he doesn't want to hurt anyone, he just wants payback, and I'm not leaving my daughter to him when I know that!"

Cole heard a key in the door, and relief shook him to his core as Todd, John and his mother came rushing in a moment later, looking ready for anything only to discover absolutely nothing waiting for them.

"Where the hell are they, John?" Todd thundered.

"I don't know, Manning, I thought he had them right here, waiting for-"

"Wait, shh," Marty ordered, frowning. "What was that?"

Marty quickly followed the sound, and froze, stunned, as her eyes first fell on Schuyler, unconscious and bleeding right to the side of the doorway in the living room, and then her own son, duct taped to a chair and screaming against his gag in a desperate attempt to get their attention.

"Oh my God, Cole!"

Marty instantly dashed over to her son as John dropped to his knees beside Schuyler, rolling him over and gently shaking his shoulders, and Todd looked infuriated by the scene- the absence of his daughter and Rosen from it in particular. Spotting Starr's phone laying forgotten on the table, Todd yanked it up, gripping it so tightly it nearly shattered in his hand, and quickly found Cole's number.

"Manning!" Zach answered brightly on the first ring. "That you I hear down there? Man, about time, twinkle and I here have been waiting!"

"Listen, you little bastard, you hurt my daughter and I will fucking kill you!" Todd thundered.

"Hey, Todd!" John snapped; too late- Zach hung up, and Todd kicked the wall in frustration.

"Goddamn it!"

"Nice work," John hissed, continuing his attempt to stir Schuyler as Marty carefully peeled the tape from Cole's mouth.

"Oh my God, are you okay?"

"Where's Starr?!" Todd demanded.

"Zach took her upstairs! I heard the door above me slam a couple minutes before you guys got in."

"My old room," Marty whispered in dread, exchanging a look with the two men.

"I'm going to kill that bastard," Todd seethed.

"Keep your cool, Manning, just-"

John was suddenly cut off by a weak groan of pain from the man on the floor beside him, and Schuyler's eyes fluttered open. He appeared confused for a moment, glancing around wearily, but reality suddenly came rushing back, and Schuyler abruptly bolted up, ignoring the pounding sensation it created in his head.

"Where's Starr?!" No time for questions or explanations about anything else right now.

"Zach's got her upstairs," John informed him quietly.

"Son of a bitch," Schuyler hissed, roughly pulling himself to his feet. "I'm going to kill him," he unknowingly echoed Todd. "I swear to God."

Schuyler ran his hand over his bloody head, eyes burning with anguish and guilt; he'd promised Starr he would protect her, and look at what happened; he'd been passed out on the floor while a psychotic rapist dragged her upstairs to do God only knew what. His anger boiling over, Schuyler slammed his fist to the wall in frustration; she'd only been here in the first place because of _him_, and he hadn't even been able to keep her safe. Some boyfriend he was.

"Hey, Schuyler, I think you need to stay down," John said gently. "Looks like you took a good hit, you're bleeding and-"

"Does it look like I care?" he asked impatiently, turning to Todd. "What are we going to do?"

"What the hell do you mean 'we'?"

"Both of you need to keep cool," John cut in. "Why don't you just let me go up and-"

"That bastard has my daughter, you're not doing shit without me!"

"I'm not just gonna wait here and twiddle my thumbs," Schuyler snapped at the same time.

"Mom, get this stuff off of me!" Cole requested desperately, drawing her attention away from the other three.

"Cole, I'm sorry, but I can't, because I know if I do you'll go flying right up those stairs!"

"Shouldn't I?! Starr needs help, mom!" And he'd already failed to help her in every other way tonight, Cole thought to himself bitterly.

"She's getting it!" Marty cried, nodding to the trio behind them. "Let them handle this. It's going to be okay, _Starr's_ going to be okay."

"Okay, you obviously can't be convinced, but at least stay quiet and let me do the talking, okay?" John ordered.

Todd and Schuyler both looked none too pleased by this, but reluctantly nodded as they quietly made their way up the stairs, Todd pointing out the way to Marty's old room.

"Remember, both of you- lose your tempers, and bad things are going to happen, okay?" John said shortly, before rapping on the door. "Hey, Zach, it's John McBain. Why don't you open up, man? Why don't we end this before someone gets hurt?"

"Someone getting hurt is the fun part," Zach replied after a moment, John and Todd's presence apparently not worrying him- his voice was smug as ever. Schuyler wasn't even surprised by the rush of pure hatred it caused in him.

"You don't want to end up back in prison, Zach."

"Hey, don't try and play with me, _John_," Zach snapped, now sounding a little testy.

"All right, just chill, take it easy; we're all taking you seriously out here."

"Who's we?"

"Me, Schuyler, and Todd."

"Schuyler?!" Starr cried from inside the room before she could help herself, tears of relief burning her eyes to know he was okay.

"Hey, I told you to shut up!" Zach shouted, whipping around to face Starr on the bed where he'd pushed her, gesturing to her with the gun; Starr swallowed roughly and nodded.

In the hall, both Todd and Schuyler had a physical reaction to hearing Starr be spoken to that way, both appearing ready to kill, but John quickly shot them a look of warning, shaking his head. Schuyler clenched his fists, the force it took to keep from responding to Starr physically hurting him.

"Hey, Zach, I get it, I do- you have a score to settle. But listen, the kid's not part of this."

"Maybe not, but she's sure coming in handy!" he snickered.

"You're just getting in deeper, Zach. Open the door, let her go, and we'll talk."

"I don't need talk, I need money!"

"I can't make that kind of deal, Zach."

"I'm getting out of this free and clear, with money in my pocket, or so help me God I will kill her!"

Schuyler felt a violent rush of anger, turning and facing the other way as he took a deep breath, trying to restrain the urge to just kick the fucking door down.

"Hey, Zach," Todd spoke up, ignoring John's look. "You want a hostage? Take me." There was only silence in response, and Schuyler felt a surge of hope, praying Zach would agree to the trade. "Rosen?"

"Your daughter's real touched you'd trade places with her, Todd- it's just too bad you've got zero value as a hostage, considering everyone in this town- hell, everyone in this _house_- hates your guts. Besides, Starr here is just too cute- and she's growing up so fast, if you know what I mean."

"John, get Starr out of there, _now_; come up with a new plan, because this one clearly isn't working!" Schuyler hissed, panic making his heart nearly pound of his chest.

"Stay calm, I'm working on it."

Schuyler shook his head in disbelief, now feeling the slight urge to punch _John._ A convicted rapist was threatening to assault his girlfriend, but, oh, okay, John was 'working on it', he could totally stay calm! Schuyler looked around the hall, trying to find some way he could help Starr.

"What do you want, Zach?" Todd demanded, his own anger more quiet, seething.

"I told you!"

"Money? You got it."

"Good answer- too bad that wasn't what you said the first time I asked."

"You're right, that was a mistake- let me fix it now."

"Don't promise him anything until he lets her go," John whispered urgently.

"Listen he thinks _I_ ruined his life- he just wants me to pay!"

"Hey, what's with the whispering?! Big meeting of the minds?" Zach snorted.

"Zach, let us see Starr, all right?" Schuyler blurted out before he could stop himself. "Just let us know she's okay, and you'll get whatever you want."

"He's right, Zach. I know there's a lot you and I need to talk about- just let us see Starr, and let me in, and you and I can have this out."

"Hmm, let me think about that…no thanks! Now, you should know I've got a gun pointed at your daughter's head right now, so you should all probably leave- who knows what could happen if you keep distracting me."

"Motherfu-"

John clamped a hand over Todd's mouth and all but dragged him back to the stairs, Schuyler following despondently as his mind raced to come up with an idea, ignoring the physical throbbing in his head.

Downstairs, Marty had finally given in to Cole's wishes and cut the tape off of him, but she gripped his arm tightly the moment he bolted from the chair, keeping him next to her.

"We're leaving this house right now, Cole, and we're waiting outside until it's over, come on."

"What?! Mom, Starr is upstairs, being held hostage by the same guy who…look, you don't get it," he sighed irritably.

"Don't ever fucking touch me, McBain!" Cole was interrupted as Todd spat those words, shoving John away from him the moment they reached the bottom of the stairs.

"What happened?!" Cole and Marty cried in unison.

"Zach's not up for talking," Schuyler snapped shortly.

"So Starr is still up there with him," Cole said in disgust, turning to his mom. "See, I can't leave, not when she's like this, mom- _I love her._"

"Well fine, then, I'm not leaving either! Look, we have to call the cops now!"

"No!" Schuyler shouted in frustration. "How many times does he have to say it? If we call the cops, he will kill her!"

"Well, what do you want to do, Joplin?! Sit here and just _hope_ the convicted rapist lets my daughter go? Hey, if we're not going to be doing anything else- wanna tell me why the fuck you and my daughter were here in the first place? What, did you want round two with me and bring her with you- did you drag Starr into this mess?"

"You're blaming _me?_ Zach is here because of you, Todd!" Schuyler exploded, even knowing that wasn't entirely true; it was more his fault than anybody's, but Schuyler had to direct this anger at _someone_ or he was going to burst. "Zach has your daughter in that room because he wants payback against _you_! Starr is in this mess because you're a sick bastard and it came back to-"

"This is really helping, guys, great job!" John interrupted. Todd and Schuyler both took a breath, separating.

"Okay, Todd, is there a way into the bedroom other than the door in the hall? And the window?" Schuyler asked him quietly.

"You going somewhere with…hey, you okay?" John cut himself off to ask Cole, frowning- the boy didn't look so good.

"I'm fine," Cole muttered, shaking his head. His hand automatically went to his pocket, but he only felt an empty baggie within, and clenched his fists in frustration.

"You going somewhere with this?" John asked Schuyler.

"Yeah- I noticed a forced air vent in the hallway. Is there a duct that connects it to that room?"

"I don't know, but I had a blueprint drawn up last fall," Todd remembered, a gleam of hope appearing in his eyes. He disappeared for a moment and quickly returned with the blueprint in hand, which they all crowded around.

"Look, there's the ductwork," Schuyler said, spotting it quickly. "Just follow right along this path and it leads straight to the connecting bathroom of the bedroom- we can get in that way."

Everyone but Todd, too distracted with his mental planning, glanced at Schuyler in surprise.

"How did you-"

"When you're addicted to drugs and your friends and family resort to locking you in your room, you come up with unique ways to get of the house and get your fix, like getting out through the airducts" he muttered, shrugging uncomfortably. "Come on, let's go."

"Schuyler, you're bleeding, you've probably got a concussion," John interjected. "Maybe you shouldn't-"

"I promised Starr I wouldn't let Zach hurt her- I _promised_ her," Schuyler said darkly, his voice thick with guilt and pain, his eyes swimming with emotion. "Let's go already."

"I'm going with you," Cole announced, starting to follow the trio.

"No, Cole," John said quickly as Todd and Schuyler continued without even pausing. "You need to stay here and protect your mom, all right? It's three to one already; we should be back downstairs, _with_ Starr, within fifteen minutes, but if we're not, you call the station and ask for Officer Sahid, she'll know what to do. Can you handle that?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, good man."

"Be careful," Marty said weakly. John threw her a reassuring smile.

"I will."

He took off as well now, and Cole paced around anxiously, frowning as he saw something glittering on the floor; he stooped down to pick up, his heart twisting when he realized what it was.

"What is it?" Marty asked softly.

"Starr's locket," he sighed. "The one with Hope's hair in it- she's had it ever since we thought Hope was…" he trailed off, shuddering. "It must have fallen off when Zach _attacked_ her," he spat, suddenly clutching the locket so tightly that it nearly drew blood from his hand. He flopped down on the couch with a sigh, and Marty quietly sat next to him.

"What happened?"

"Huh?"

"A minute ago, you said you love Starr…what changed?"

"Nothing changed- I never stopped. I _tried_ to, I wanted to hate her for lying for her dad and helping him get away with what he tried to do, and for moving on, but I can't."

"Moving on? Oh, I'm sorry, Cole, I didn't know Starr had someone else," she said softly, squeezing her son's shoulder.

"Yeah, that's why I was here, actually, I told Todd," he sighed. "Hey, you wanna know the really fun part? The new guy? Also here."

"What are you…_Schuyler?_" she gasped. "That's why _he's_ here? Isn't he her teacher?"

"Yep," Cole said darkly. "That's why I came here to tell Todd, he had a right to know!" he told her defensively.

"But he wasn't here."

"No, he was here and I told him what happened. Then he took off."

"To go after Schuyler?"

"Yeah. I probably shouldn't have told him what happened, but I didn't know what else to do. Or maybe I just wanted him to kill the guy," Cole admitted darkly, before softening slightly. "Good thing he didn't, though, because Joplin can obviously protect Starr a hell of a lot better than I can."

"Hey, she's gonna be fine, Cole," Marty promised. Cole shrugged.

"No thanks to me. God, what if Todd had snapped and killed Schuyler? Who knows what Zach would have done to Starr by now, since I'm obviously useless!"

"Don't beat yourself up, Cole! It's understandable that you want to protect Starr from this teacher- he might be helping now, but if he and Starr are…_together_, that doesn't change the fact that he's doing a really bad thing." Cole nodded.

"I just don't want to see her get hurt anymore than she already has been."

"Of course not, sweetie."

"You know, the truth is it really doesn't matter what Starr does or who she does it with. It's not going to change the way I feel about her. I love her."

"Well, maybe after all this is over," Marty began hopefully. "You two can-"

"No, Mom, no. No, I really screwed up. She's not going to take me back. Besides, she loves Schuyler."

"She doesn't love him, Cole. Starr's being taken advantage of by an older man, she's in over her head."

"Well, don't tell her that," he snorted. "But look, it doesn't matter, as long as she comes out of this okay. I would leave town and never see her again if I thought it would make her come down these stairs in one piece."

"I know, I know."

"No, you don't. How could you possibly know how it feels to have the person you love trapped with some killer?"

Marty just looked away, her eyes heavy.

"I can imagine. Hey, Cole...does Blair know about this _thing_ between Starr and her teacher?"

"No, I only told Todd."

"Soemone should really let her know..."

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
"Never thought your perverted fixation on my daughter and the fact that you're a drug addict would actually prove useful, kudos on proving me wrong."

"Go to hell, Todd," Schuyler replied calmly, continuing to crawl through the duct as quickly as possible; he had no energy left to hate Todd with, it was all too focused on saving Starr from this creep.

"You first."

"That's mature, Manning," John hissed from behind them. "You doing okay up there, Schuyler?"

"I'm fine," he muttered, his pounding head disagreeing.

"Who the hell cares, McBain- can we remain focused on my daughter, please?"

"Todd, don't think I don't care about-"

"We're here," Schuyler interrupted tightly, quickly but quietly kicking the vent out and silently dropping to the bathroom floor.

Todd and John quickly followed, and Todd and Schuyler both started to lunge for the door, but with an exasperated sigh, John yanked them back.

"_Wait,_" he whispered. "For all we know, he still has the gun to her head and pulls the trigger the second he sees the door open. Wait until we're sure she's not going to get hurt."

With an infuriated sigh, Schuyler let go of the knob, just pressing his ear to the door instead. Thanks to him, the girl he loved was being held hostage by a complete psychopath, and now, even though she was only _feet_ away from him, all he could do was wait here helplessly.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
"Maybe I don't know your dad as well as I thought- I would have guessed that he'd have busted the door down by now. Or maybe he just doesn't care about his little Starr as much as I thought," Zach mused, still watching the door to the room carefully. "I mean, I'm not surprised the teacher gave up so quickly, he's got a whole classroom full of replacement girls to screw, but I thought daddy would have made a bit more effort."

Starr ignored his words in disgust; she knew Schuyler and her dad had to be figuring out some other plan, Zach's claims otherwise didn't get to her in the slightest. She continued struggling to free her hands since he'd duct taped them together behind her back, but when Zach glanced back and saw what she was doing, he just chuckled.

"By all means, keep trying if you want- I already know you're not going anywhere."

"Well, fine, because Schuyler's just going to get me out of here anyway!" Starr snapped defiantly. Zach slowly turned back to her, his expression quickly making her regret that.

He set the gun at the foot of the bed, then sat down next to her himself, smiling.

"Why do you want to get away from me so badly, twinkle? I mean, really, what have I done? Sure, there was that night with Marty, but your dad was there too, it was his _idea_, and you don't seem to hate him. I hurt your boyfriend downstairs, I know, but again, judging from that black eye, so did your father- just more proof he gets away with all the same shit I do," Zach spat, before calming down again. "I know I hurt you, but I told you, I didn't want to do to that- you _made_ me," he murmured, reaching out and stroking her bruised skin with his fingertips. Starr felt violently ill, turning her head.

"Don't touch me," she hissed, sickened. Zach suddenly grabbed her chin and roughly jerked her head back over to look at him, his eyes dark.

"You say that to the teacher? Really, Starr, I don't see what makes us so different."

Starr just glared, not wanting to waste her breath arguing with the psycho. Just as Starr was sure Zach was about to get up to watch the door again, his fingers dug into her skin even harder, and he suddenly slammed his lips roughly to hers.

Starr screamed, but it was swallowed and drowned out as he violently moved his mouth against hers, biting at her lips hard enough to draw blood as he kissed her. She frantically tried to move her head, get away from him, but he held her too tightly. Starr's heart thundered in terror, disgust overwhelming her stomach, as she felt herself begin to cry against her will, still desperately trying to get away from him. Zach's free hand drifted to the bottom of her shirt, lightly skimming along her jeans, gripping the snap on them, and, receiving a surge of adrenaline from the fear currently in her heart, Starr managed to snap her head forward and roughly headbutt him. Zach cried out, briefly letting go, and Starr desperately tried to roll away from him.

"_Get off of me!"_ Starr shrieked hysterically, feeling him grasp her wrist.

The terror she currently felt was so consuming that Starr did not even realize the bathroom door had been loudly thrown open, didn't even notice the three men rushing into the room, until only a moment later, Zach suddenly _was_ flung off of her, thrown against the night table on the floor, his head connecting to the wood with a loud crack. She gasped, looking up in shock, and almost cried out in relief when saw Schuyler standing over Zach, a look of pure rage on his face, infuriation twisting his features into something cold and hard.

Taking a shaky breath, Schuyler managed to tear his eyes from Zach long enough to take a glance at Starr, and the moment he saw her frightened tears, the painful bruising all along her face, the blood on her lips, Schuyler felt something inside of him break- snap, perhaps, to be more accurate. Just like the desire for drugs, the overwhelming anger he'd used to have in his dark days had never really gone away completely. It was there just under the surface, held back by a firm band of restraint, but that band had been stretched in recent days by Cole's possessive behavior of Starr, by Todd's little visit, by Zach's behavior towards Starr downstairs, and now, the sight of what Zach had done to Starr caused it to snap completely.

It was like Schuyler's mind proceeded to shut down and his body just took control, that rage fueling him on, as he fell to his knees beside Zach, yanking him up by the throat to look him in the eyes; to his disbelief, Zach just _laughed_.

"What, you can't share? Hey, since you interrupted, just tell me until I get to find out myself- is she good?"

Schuyler's fist instantly shot out and punched Zach hard in the nose, hearing the satisfying crunch of bone. His hand, already aching from punching the wall, felt like it was now throbbing, but Schuyler ignored the pain.

"Schuyler!" Starr shrieked in surprise, her threat leaping to her throat; her attention was so completely focused on Schuyler and Zach that she barely even registered her dad sitting on the bed beside her, rambling on about how glad he was she was safe, and how sorry he was, and how he was going to murder Zach. "He's _trying_ to get to you, just ignore him!"

Schuyler didn't even hear Starr, the angry buzzing in his head deafening him to everything else as he pulled back and punched Zach again…and again, and _again._ His fist struck the man's face over and over, even when Zach's body went limp, even when the blood began to flow, even when his fist was covered in his own blood as well from his torn knuckles, even when some part of his brain registered that his hand must be broken.

"Dad," Starr whispered, watching in horror; it was like Schuyler was in a trance or being possessed or something. "Do something, stop him."

"Why?" Todd asked with a snort, struggling to remove the tape from her wrists. "Rosen's just lucky I didn't get there first."

"Schuyler, that's enough, he's out- stop!" John shouted. Schuyler remained in that state of unawareness, continuing to strike Zach again and again.

"What's going on?!" Cole suddenly shouted from the other side of the door, pounding on it rapidly.

"Cole, they said to wait downstairs!" Marty cried nervously, obviously having followed her son up the stairs.

John impatiently threw the lock, opening the door, and Cole and Marty quickly stumbled in, only to suddenly freeze in their tracks as they took in the sight of Schuyler, looking like he was trying to beat Zach to _death_, while Starr and Todd watched from the bed, Starr in a stunned, quiet horror while Todd seemed amused, and John continued to shout at Schuyler, trying to bring him back to earth.

It registered after a moment, when what was happening with Schuyler wasn't so distracting, that he had just seen that Starr was okay, and Cole sighed in relief, rushing to bed.

"Starr, thank God you're okay," he murmured, reaching out to hug her.

Starr jumped, flinching and reeling back as soon his hand landed on her shoulder.

"Don't!" she shouted quickly. "Don't touch me!"

"Starr, are you…are you okay?" he asked slowly, furrowing his brow. Marty quickly joined them on the bed, reassuringly stroking Starr's hair which just made her flinch again.

"You're safe now, Starr, just talk to us," she encouraged softly. Todd jumped in now.

"Starr, tell me that bastard didn't-"

"I don't want to talk about this right now!" Starr shouted frantically, suddenly finding it difficult to breathe with all of them crowding her like this; she drew her knees to her chest, desperately wishing she could clamp her hands over her ears. "Just stop, I don't want to talk about this; just…get away from me, make Schuyler stop, and oh my God, dad, will you get this tape off of me already?! I can't move and it feels like I can't breathe, and I need Schuyler and I just need you all to stop and let me breathe!" she rambled on wildly.

"Okay, okay, sweetie," Todd said soothingly, shooting Cole and Marty a quick glare. "You heard her, get away from her."

Cole quickly slid off the bed as he was told, not wanting to do anything to make Starr worse- it was the absolute least he could do after all the ways he'd screwed up today. As Todd struggled to free Starr from her bonds, Cole joined John in trying to stop Schuyler, while Marty just hovered nervously by the door.

On the floor beside the bed, Schuyler slowly became dully aware of John and Cole's shouting, but it sounded dim, far away; it felt as though he was hearing them yell at someone else, not him. He could feel the hands on his shoulders, but quickly shrugged them off. Time was passing in a blur, and making Zach suffer for as long as possible was all he could think of.

"There, sweetie, it's off, you're fine," Todd said as he tore the remaining tape from her wrists, anger burning through him again when he saw that her wrists were red and raw now. If he stopped Schuyler, it would only be so he could kill Rosen himself.

"Finally," she sighed, instantly scooting to the edge of the bed.

"Starr, you shouldn't!" Marty said quickly, realizing what she was doing. "He's not himself right now, he doesn't know what he's doing."

"He's not going to hurt me!" Starr scoffed, sounding disgusted she would even suggest it. She took a deep breath, and continued. "Schuyler," Starr said in almost a whisper, delicately placing her hand on his shoulder.

Much to the shock of the other four, _instantly_, as if someone had just found his shut down button, Schuyler went still, breathing heavily as his shoulders sagged, that one quiet voice and soft touch finally doing the trick and getting through to him.

As he snapped back into awareness, Schuyler finally _felt_ the pain in his hand, and looked to his torn knuckles, then Zach's face, almost unrecognizable after what he'd done, in utter shock, feeling a surge of horrified disgust with himself; what had he just _done?_ Had all that progress he'd made over the years been for nothing if he could do something this horrible? And in front of _Starr_ no less? Jesus, she was probably terrified of him now, like she had every right to be.

"Schuyler," Starr said again, desperate for him to look at her.

He finally did, and to her own surprise, Starr felt herself tear up in relief at the sight of those familiar eyes, finally feeling assured that she was safe now. Without another word, Starr weakly slid off the bed and onto her knees on the floor beside Schuyler. She released a great shuddering breath as she collapsed against him, winding her arms around his waist and burying her head against his chest, appearing as though she was trying to disappear into him as she cried. Schuyler took a deep breath, taking comfort in her scent, in the feel of her safe in his arms, and hugged her tightly, silently reassuring himself that she was okay, that he'd gotten there in time.

"I'm sorry," Schuyler murmured against her ear, his expression overwhelmed with shame, pulling her into his lap and rubbing soothing circles on her back as he scooted them back away from Zach's limp body. He felt another rush of self loathing as his motions left a mixture of his and Zach's blood stained on her shirt. "I'm _so_ sorry."

"Don't," Starr choked out instantly, despite not even knowing what he was apologizing for- she didn't need to. "Don't be."

Schuyler dropped his head against her hair, and neither said anything else, just holding each other tightly, as the rest of the occupants of the room shifted around awkwardly, uncomfortable (particularly Cole) witnessing such an intimate moment- it felt like they were intruding. Todd looked furious over the sight, but even he knew better than to try and tear Starr away from Schuyler at this moment.

The room was thick with silence for a minute, nobody saying a word, but it was broken a moment later as they moved into action. Todd looked at his daughter to reassure himself once more she was safe, and reluctantly left the room, calling the cops.

"I should call Blair, she deserves to know what's happening," Marty said quietly, following Todd into the hall.

"Hey, Cole," John said softly, not wanting to disturb the girl. "I don't want to leave them here with Zach, not when he could wake up, so why don't you do me a favor and go call the paramedics? Tell them as much of what happened as you can so Starr won't have to."

Cole was so distracted, glancing back and forth from Starr and Schuyler to Zach's bloody mess of a face, that he barely seemed to hear him.

"Cole?"

"Yeah, sorry. I'll get right on that."

Cole left just as Todd reappeared, snapping his phone shut.

"Cops will be here any minute," he said to John, still watching Schuyler with his daughter like a hawk.

"What?!" Starr suddenly cried, her head snapping up to glance at her dad over Schuyler's shoulder, before she shot Schuyler a panicked look. "Oh my God, Schuyler, you have to leave," she said frantically, still crying. "If you're here when the cops get here, they're gonna want to know _why_ you were here in the first place, and they're going to find out somehow, and so is the school!"

"I can't leave you, Starr," Schuyler protested strongly, shaking his head.

"I don't want you to go," she said in tears, her grip on his shirt, so strong that it was turning her fingers white from the force, proving that. "But I don't want you to lose your job more!"

"Starr, I could not care less about that, I really couldn't," he informed her, almost laughing over the idea that it would matter, especially now of all times.

"Well, I care! You love teaching, Schuyler, I'm not going to let you lose that because of me!"

"Because of you?" he repeated in disbelief. "Starr, it wouldn't be because…you know what, that doesn't even matter now. Just know that I'm not going anywhere."

"But-"

"Starr," Todd interrupted gently.

Starr glanced back, somehow holding Schuyler even tighter, like she was afraid he was going to disappear when she took her eyes off of him. Todd took a deep breath, willing himself to do this, much as he hated it. Joplin was the one person bringing his daughter any sense of comfort or safety right now, and he was the only one of them she wanted. After the hell she'd just been through with Zach because of _his_ past, this was the absolute least he could do for his daughter. Besides, truth was, he had a _tiny_, grudging amount of respect for Joplin after what he'd just done to Zach.

"If the cops do ask, I'll them Schuyler was here because I asked him over so we could discuss your courseload."

Starr and Schuyler both looked stunned by this, and Starr just gaped at her dad in disbelief for a moment, feeling like she was Cindy Lou Who watching the Grinch's heart grow three sizes or something.

"Thank you, dad," she whispered simply, dropping her head back down to Schuyler's shoulder.

In the next ten minutes, the once silent house seemed to explode with action; Blair, the paramedics, and the cops all arrived within moments of each other, and everybody was firing off questions, demanding answers, trying to discover what exactly had happened, gathering evidence and trying to treat the injured. In the middle of all the chaos, Starr and Schuyler managed to find a small bit of peace, left alone in the room for a moment now that John had stepped out as well. They just clung to each other in silence as they soaked up the last moments they had before the chaos reached them too.

"Hey, Schuyler," Starr began weakly, sighing as she heard her mom's hysterical shriek of 'Where's my daughter?!' downstairs, heard her father instruct her and the paramedics to this room. They were in for a seriously long night. "I didn't get a chance to say this yet, and I don't know if I will later, so- thank you for saving me. I knew you would," she said softly, smiling.

"God, don't thank me for that, Starr, please," Schuyler grit out through his teeth. He might have gotten there soon enough to prevent Zach from doing something unthinkable, sure, but the fact that she'd been alone with him for as much as a _minute_ meant he'd been too late- he'd failed her all the same.

Starr almost cracked a smile, thinking Schuyler was just in ultra modest mode or something. She dropped her head to the crook of his neck again, lightly nuzzling her nose against his skin.

"Love you, Schuyler," she murmured tiredly. For a moment, the only thing Schuyler could think was 'Why?' Why, after everything he'd caused her to go through this night, after the ways he'd let her down, did Starr even like him, let alone love him?

"I love you more than anything, Starr," he said honestly, pressing a light kiss to her hair.

Starr finally felt a small, but genuine smile tug at her lips as she pulled out of his embrace and reluctantly moved out of his lap, seconds before her mom came dashing into the room, quickly followed by the paramedics and her dad.

"Oh, Starr, my baby!" Blair wailed, falling to her knees beside her daughter, pulling her into a hug. Starr went tense, her mind instinctively panicking against her will at the tight hold; it seemed Schuyler was the only one who could touch her without the reactive freak out right now.

"Mom, please don't," she muttered uncomfortably, squirming away.

"Oh, baby, what did he do to you? Look at your face!" she cried a moment later, seeing the large bruise, beginning to swell now. "I'll kill him, I swear I will!"

"M'am, I'm sorry, but I need you to move so I can examine your daughter," a paramedic said gently.

"Of course, do what you have to!"

"Hey!" Todd suddenly barked at the team kneeling by Zach. "What the hell are you doing?! That guy held a gun my daughter's head, why are you treating him? Just leave him there to die, it's not like anybody will care."

"I'm fine, really," she heard Schuyler insisting. "I don't need-"

"Mr. Joplin," she cut in sharply, glancing away from the flashlight the paramedic had requested she follow with her eyes. "You probably have a concussion and a broken hand, don't be stupid, let them examine you-"

"Starr, sweetie, just focus on what the paramedic is asking you to do," Blair interrupted, looking like she was scared the mere effort of talking would break her.

Starr sighed, gazing around at the frenetic going ons in the room, all the voices making her feel a little dizzy; just like she'd thought, this was going to be a very, _very_ long night.


	13. Chapter 13

"And you're sure he didn't cause her to fracture anything?"

"M_oooo_m," Starr sighed irritably. Michael just chuckled patiently.

"I'm sure; Starr, there's some deep bruising where you were hit with the book, but no fractures, nothing's broken. Just ice it, take some over the counter painkillers- a prescription shouldn't be necessary- and you'll be fine. Unfortunately, I do have some bad news; I'm sure you already suspected as much, but you have a concussion. It's minor, though, absolutely nothing to worry about."

"Do I have to stay here overnight?"

"Nope, you're free to go home tonight."

"I'm not supposed to go to sleep, though, right?" Starr asked. "That's what they always say on TV."

"Not exactly, no," Michael laughed. "When you get home, someone should ask you a few questions, like your name, what happened, who's the current president, et cetera, just to make sure you're alert and aware, and once more a couple of hours later, but you should be fine to sleep after that, as long as someone checks in on you in the morning as well."

"Oh, good," Blair sighed. "She needs some rest." Starr wrinkled her nose, not quite so fond of the idea.

"Do you have any other questions?" Starr and Blair glanced at each other, and simultaneously shook their heads no. "Okay, great! I believe the cops want to take your statement, and they're just going to do it here so you don't have to make a trip to the station, so just hang tight, someone will be along shortly." He turned to leave, but Starr quickly stopped him, determined to finally get an answer from someone.

"Hey, um, Michael- has anyone examined Mr. Joplin yet?" she asked casually, trying to pretend she wasn't _dying_ to know.

"Yes, they have."

"And he's okay?" she pressed urgently.

"Concussion, minor like yours, and he needed a few stitches where he was hit with the gun. His hand's broken, but it won't need surgery or any pins, luckily, just a cast, and someone's taking care of that right now."

"Oh, good," she sighed in immense relief, finally feeling like she could breathe properly. "Thanks, Michael."

He left, and Blair smiled, though she was careful to ignore her mom instincts to sit with her daughter, hug her, having realized when Starr nearly had a panic attack in the ambulance that she needed breathing room right now.

"I'm glad Mr. Joplin's okay too- I owe him so much after what he did for you tonight. It's fortunate that your dad asked him over, huh?"

"Sure is," Starr said tightly, trying to disguise her true feelings at the mention of her dad. He seemed to think everything that happened with Zach gave them a fresh start, that the two of them were okay now, but that wasn't true at all; what he'd said and done to Schuyler today still mattered, the fact that he was still threatening to destroy Schuyler, and thus, by association, _her_, if one of them didn't end this relationship, still mattered, and she was still furious with him.

All she wanted to do now was see Schuyler, hold him for dear life and never let go, but Starr knew that was impossible; they'd been separated ever since the paramedics arrived, and she knew there would probably be no other chance to see each other tonight. Sure, she could pretend to be a worried student checking on her teacher, but truthfully, it would probably be worse to see Schuyler hurt and not be able to touch him, show how she really felt; to have to keep her distance and just give a breezy 'Hope you're okay!', than it would be not to see him at all.

The thought of having to stay away from Schuyler now of all times, though, physically hurt; she could already feel the aching in her chest. Starr still felt jittery, and scared, and tense, and a thousand other horrible things; he was the only person that made her feel at peace, and she _needed_ that so badly.

"Starr?!"

Starr jumped at the sound of her name being cried, and looked up just as Langston and Markko came barreling into the room, Langston appearing to be on the edge of a full blown panic attack.

"Oh my God, there you are! We just heard you, Cole and Schuyler were attacked by Zach Rosen, but nobody would tell us what happened, or if you were all okay, and I have been freaking out!" she cried. Langston hopped up on the bed beside Starr, and Starr uncomfortably slid the other way; Langston noticed and stayed where she was.

"Are you okay?" Markko asked softly, his own concern for his friend calmer but just as intense. "I mean, uh, other than the obvious," he muttered, eyes flickering to her bruises.

"I'm fine," Starr reassured them. "Schu…Mr. J," she corrected, nervously glancing at her mom. "stopped Zach before he could hurt me."

"Okay, just tell me everything that happened, because I am so freaking confused right now."

"If you want to," Markko added quickly.

"Oh, yeah, duh, of course I meant if you want to, you don't have to tell me anything if you don't, I mean, you can tell me to just get the hell out right now if you-"

"Langston, I don't mind, it's fine," Starr interrupted; were this any other day, she would have laughed over her friend's wild rambling, but nothing seemed very funny today.

"Hey, sweetie, I'm going to check in with your father, and see how Cole's doing, okay?" Blair interrupted softly, her eyes heavy with worry for her daughter. "Just yell if you need anything."

"I will." Blair left, and Starr took a deep breath. "Okay, so I rushed to my dad's house so I could delete the message, and there was this guy I didn't know already there."

As nerves fluttered in her stomach as she remembered Zach, Starr's hand reflectively went for her locket, thanks to her longtime habit of clutching it like a life preserver when she was upset, but only touched the cool skin of her chest. Starr frowned, glanced down, and gasped, her eyes growing dark with dismay.

"Oh, no."

"Starr, what is it?" Langston immediately asked.

"I lost my locket- Zach must have ripped it off or something," Starr sighed heavily. "Damn it. I know I have Hope herself now, it shouldn't matter as much, but that's the most important thing I own. God, I could not hate this day more!"

Down the hall, Schuyler was feeling the same way, staring darkly at the floor as he lightly curled the fingers that were free from the plaster, testing out the new cast.

"Hey, Schuyler. How's the cast?" Michael paused to ask as he passed by the doorway.

"Fine," Schuyler replied shortly.

"Good; your student's really worried about you, she's been asking how you are all night," Michael chuckled. "She'll be relieved to hear that. The cops should be here in a few minutes, okay?"

"Alright."

Michael left, and Schuyler sighed heavily; his 'student', right. He hated the thought of Starr worrying about him when he couldn't see her or do anything to make her feel better; besides, she shouldn't even be wasting her thoughts on him right now, he didn't deserve that. Her only concern should be for herself.

Outside Schuyler's room, Michael was suddenly flagged down by Todd, who had yet to stop looking like he wanted to kill someone since he'd walked into the hospital, causing Michael to swallow nervously.

"Yes, Mr. Manning?"

"Hey, nobody's mentioned it yet, so I just wanted to ask- how's Rosen? Dead, hopefully?"

"Well, uh, not quite, but he certainly looks like walking death. His nose is severely broken, both eyes black, swollen to the size of balloons, both eye sockets are fractured, numerous broken cheek bones, and a severe concussion." Todd felt a surge of satisfaction, even though that was the absolute least of what Zach had coming to him. "Whoever got to him did quite a number on the guy."

"Thanks for reminding me," Todd muttered, suddenly brushing past Michael. Michael furrowed his brow in confusion, then simply shrugged and continued on his way.

There was a short rap on the door and Schuyler looked up, expecting to see an officer here to interview him, but held back a groan when he saw Todd Manning instead, rolling his eyes; this was what he got for thinking the day couldn't get worse.

"What, Todd?" he snapped, in no mood for dealing with this man right now. Todd raised his eyebrows.

"Considering that I'm currently holding your entire career, and your _life_, in my hands, you might want to watch how you talk to me."

"Sorry," he replied shortly, his tone thick with sarcasm. "Can I help you with something?"

"Considering that I haven't killed you yet for molesting my daughter, I think you owe me a little more gratitude than that. And so you know, that's what I'm here for, to set the record straight on something- I don't want you thinking that because I fed into Starr's delusions about loving you, and helped her out by letting you stay tonight, it means anything is different about the situation- it's not. I still think you're a sick son of a bitch, and if I ever catch you with my daughter again after this night… if you don't act like the _adult_ you are and end things with the _child_ you're seeing, I will still guarantee you never teach again, and quite possibly snap your neck."

Todd's threats rolled right off of Schuyler, and he didn't even bat an eye; he could not possibly give less of a shit about anything Todd threatened to do. There were a lot of reasons he shouldn't be with Starr, it was getting harder all the time, particularly after this night, to deny it, but Todd's opinion wasn't a factor.

"However, despite what some people think, I'm not an unreasonable man-" Schuyler snorted, which Todd ignored. "So I'm also here to say nice job with Rosen."

Schuyler emitted a strangled laugh of disgust, looking at Todd in disbelief. If he'd needed any other proof that he'd done a horrible thing tonight, the fact that Todd Manning was impressed would be it.

"What, do you think I'm proud of it?" Todd shrugged.

"Why not? Considering that you're a pedophile and a drug addict, this has to be the one decent thing you've done in your entire life, right?"

"I could have _killed_ him! I almost did! I've spent years in counseling learning how _not_ to react to situations exactly like that, and I still snapped and almost beat someone to death- in front of your already terrified daughter! Rehab is all about learning control, in all aspects of your life, and I completely lost that control tonight," Schuyler hissed through his teeth, his complete and utter disgust with himself almost choking him.

"Alright, let me get this straight. You take advantage of my daughter, I threaten to kill you, and you defend your actions. Then, you do a number on Rosen, I approve, and _now_ you're ashamed of yourself. You're a strange man, Joplin."

"Get out of my room, Manning," Schuyler replied shortly, unable to take being in his presence right now.

Todd's natural gut reaction was to antagonize, or to stay here until he got some kind of guarantee that he was done with his daughter, but he quickly thought better of it; the last thing he needed was Starr getting more attached to this guy out of sympathy. Besides, if Joplin's face when he mentioned Starr was any indication, he seemed to be listening to reason, finally, and the problem would solve itself soon enough.

"Like I have any desire to stay."

Todd left, only to be replaced by Cole less than a minute later, and Schuyler groaned.

"What the hell is with this day?" he muttered to himself.

"I'm not here to start anything," Cole said as he walked in. "If I had a white flag, I'd be waving it right now." Schuyler glanced at him with a look of surprise as Cole cautiously stepped over to his bedside, his face unreadable. "Look, I guess I'm…here to apologize," he muttered, staring at his feet. "The crap that happened today was pretty much all my fault. I don't know, I guess…seeing what you did to Zach and seeing you with Starr was a wake-up call or something. If you would do that for her, you can't be that bad a guy, and she...she obviously wants you, and there's nothing I can do about that. It wasn't my business to tell Manning, and I just followed it up by being completely useless at the house while you saved her- I was clearly wrong about you being the one bad for her to be around. So, yeah, whatever, sorry," he sighed.

"Thank you, Cole," Schuyler said simply, forcing himself to project a friendliness he didn't particularly feel right now; the counselor in him just kept reminding him that had been a huge step for Cole and it needed to be positively reinforced. "And, Cole, I don't blame you, you had every right to tell Todd; what the hell else are you supposed to do when you find out your…friend, is dating a teacher?" Schuyler asked, his voice momentarily dark with bitterness. "Of course you lost it. And there was nothing you could have done about Zach, let that go."

Cole nodded, rocking awkwardly on his heels for a moment.

"One more thing- I, uh, told my mom about you two, and she's probably going to tell Blair, so, heads up there, I guess."

"Great, thanks," Schuyler sighed. Things were falling apart at an alarmingly rapid rate today, weren't they? Cole just nodded and backed away to the door.

"Just wanted to clear that up, I'm gonna go now. Starr and I need to work out a story to tell the cops about why she and I were there- when they ask for your story, you can tell them what really happened, except that you were there to see Todd, not for Starr, obviously, I'll make sure whatever we say goes with that."

"Got it."

Cole turned to leave, and was halfway out the door when to Schuyler's own surprise, something inside of him suddenly twisted, and he abruptly spoke up.

"I'm sorry, Cole."

"For what?" Cole asked slowly, furrowing his brow as he glanced over his shoulder.

"God, I don't know," Schuyler laughed darkly, shrugging. Cole really was still just a kid- despite going through many of the same things, he didn't have that old soul that Starr did, those experiences hadn't changed him like they had her, but despite still being so young, Cole just looked so weary and broken down right now, and Schuyler knew that was in large part because of him; he couldn't just not apologize for that. "For not helping you out at the house more tonight? For not doing more to help you off the pills when I'm better equipped to help you than anyone? For being so ready to give up on you when I wouldn't have been like that with anyone else at the center? Because I'm the one Starr wants, for some reason? I don't know, I'm just sorry."

Cole was silent for a moment, and then just smiled tightly, his eyes dark.

"Me too."

And then he quickly hurried out before the other man could say another word, leaving Schuyler alone with this his thoughts- the last place he needed to be right now.

***~*~*~*~~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Several hours later in her room, Starr ran her fingers through her hair with a frustrated sigh- today _officially_ could officially not be any more awful, if she hadn't already been clear on that. Dealing with the cops had sucked; even though Cole had come up with a good story (much to her surprise, it was also one that didn't exactly paint him in a flattering light. He claimed he'd gone over to accuse Todd once again of being the reason he'd lost Starr, and that Starr had heard from Markko what he was doing, and rushed over to prevent a fight, only for both of them to run into Zach. Cole had also warned her about Marty's knowledge about her and Schuyler, and apologized for his role in all that happened today, another nice surprise), one that had been easy enough to feed to the cops, having to relive each moment with Zach and repeat every disturbing word he'd said to her had been awful. With her parents both hovering over her like crazy, she hadn't been able to see Schuyler once the cops were gone, before she'd left, which had just made this aching in her chest even worse- the pain from it had surpassed the rest of her injuries.

She'd arrived home, ready for some peace and quiet, only to discover that, much to her horror, poor Talia had been stabbed and killed, apparently right in their backyard, while everyone but Ray, Lola and Dorian was out of the house. That meant Zach couldn't be the serial killer as they'd all assumed, which also meant the real killer was still running free, giving her one more thing to be terrified over tonight; she couldn't believe the cops had told them all to go ahead and sleep in the house tonight, claiming it was safe- it sure didn't feel that way. To make matters even worse, the idiots had arrested _John_, as he'd left the hospital early to come here, and had been the one to discover Talia's body. _That_ meant not only was poor John locked away for something he didn't do, but her mom was more of a mess than ever, while her dad was probably already scheming to figure out how he could use this to his advantage.

Finally, when it had become clear to Starr she wasn't getting any sleep tonight, she'd decided to work on the only unfinished homework she had, Schuyler's, only to discover her boyfriend was a total homework Nazi. Granted, this was extremely petty compared to the rest of her problems, but trying to write a ten page essay with a concussion had made her frustrated enough to whine.

Between her exhaustion and concussion, the words on the paper were practically swimming before her eyes right now, but Starr pressed on, determined to stay awake; sleep was only going to mean nightmares, and she didn't want to deal with that.

There was an unexpected knock on the door a moment later, and Starr jumped, her heart instantly leaping to her throat. She sighed a moment later as she calmed down; she'd been doing this all night, startling over every single little noise- how long was she going to be like this?

"Who is it?" she called out cautiously.

"It's, um, Jack. Can I come in?"

"Why not?" she answered irritably. Jack was not exactly her favorite person right now either.

Jack slowly walked in, already appearing shame-faced, and he gasped when he saw his sister, taking in her black and blue face and bruised lips. Starr softened as she saw the obvious guilt on her little brother's face.

"Starr, I'm sorry!" he blurted out, voice sincerely apologetic, with none of it's usual bite or sarcasm. After dealing with his constant anger for so long, he sounded unrecognizable to her. "Dad just finished telling me everything that happened tonight, and I…I didn't know that was gonna happen, okay?! I thought telling dad would just be funny, I didn't think you were gonna get _hurt!_ I'm really sorry, Starr."

"Oh, Jack, it's okay," she said softly. "This isn't your fault, don't think it is. I don't blame you, and I'm not mad at you, but…this should be a wake-up call, okay? Your actions do affect other people, Jack, and people can get _hurt_ because of them, and you've gotta start thinking about the rest of us a little more." He nodded, bowing his head.

"I will. Hey, uh, I guess dad didn't get the message, since he didn't say anything about it to me."

"No, I erased it in time."

"Good. I'm really sorry, Starr," he repeated. "I heard he, like, saved you from that guy dad used to know, so I guess I kind of…owe him, or whatever," he muttered uncomfortably, scuffing the toe of his shoe along the carpet. Starr grinned.

"Why is that?" she asked teasingly, already knowing but just wanting to make him say it.

"Look, you piss me off a lot, but you're still my sister, I don't want you getting killed!" he huffed.

"Thank you, Jack," she said softly. He shrugged, glancing up at her hesitantly.

"You're, uh, gonna be okay, right?"

"I'm going to be fine," Starr promised. "Don't worry about it. Now go get some sleep, okay? It's late."

Jack nodded and left; Starr watched him go, the smile still on her face; she didn't care if it hurt her lips. Cole and Jack had both pleasantly surprised her today, right as she had more or less given up on the two of them; at least this day had that much going for it.

Starr returned her attention to her science book, ignoring the pounding in her head, and her body's desperate desire to rest.

Several minutes later, Starr was just on the verge of giving up, her eyelids starting to flutter, when she was suddenly jarred back to awareness when she heard a rock lightly tap her window. This time, Starr didn't jump, but gave a disbelieving giggle, instantly realizing what that meant; Schuyler must really be following through on the playful suggestion she'd texted him earlier, about how they could see each other tonight- she'd suggested he sneak past the guards that had been stationed outside the house and climb the tree by her window. She'd mostly been kidding, but if he'd taken her seriously, she certainly had _no_ complaints.

She quickly crossed to the window, opening it, and peered out- sure enough, there he was, climbing the tree. Starr felt a wide grin overtake her, and it was quickly followed by a rush of giddiness, making her laugh; yes, the giddiness was partly from exhaustion hysteria, or whatever the real term for that was, but it was mostly brought on just from seeing that Schuyler loved her enough to do this.

"I can't believe I'm doing this," she heard him mutter when he got within earshot of the window. "The last time I climbed through a window was way back in _high school_."

"Oh, really? Who was the lucky girl?" Starr asked playfully, eagerly waiting for him to come in.

"You know, actually, I don't even remember her name," he admitted with a small chuckle.

"That better not be what you're saying to some other girl about _me_ in ten years when you're climbing through her window."

"Of course not. I'll be too old for climbing in ten years, I'll say it to her when I walk through the front door."

"Not funny!" Starr chirped, as Schuyler finally came through the window; he landed successfully on his feet, and she gave a quiet clap of approval.

"Thank you, thank you, I…" Schuyler suddenly froze, inhaling sharply as he got the full view of her face, and thus, saw the full extent of the damage; in the house, the bruises had just been starting to form, but her face was swollen and completely black and blue now. "Oh my God," he murmured, gently cupping her face with his good hand as the rush of guilt he felt threatened to overwhelm him.

"Not a good day, huh?" Starr asked softly, with a sad smile, as she reached out and lightly brushed her fingers first across his cast, and then his own bruise. "Matching black eyes and concussions, we are quite a pair. Speaking of- what's your occupation and your mother's first name?" she asked urgently.

"Teacher, and Leah," he chuckled. Starr widened her eyes, and he got the hint. "Uh, what are your best friend and daughter's names?"

"Langston and Hope; okay, whew, not…concussed or whatever, good to know."

Starr began to lean up to kiss him, but suddenly stopped, smiling apologetically as she grabbed her desk chair and hurried to the her door, shoving it under the door knob to make sure nobody could get in, before returning to her boyfriend's side.

Wordlessly, Schuyler pulled Starr into his arms, holding her securely, and Starr inhaled deeply- with him here, it finally didn't hurt to do so. She breathed in his familiar, comforting scent, and held him as closely as possible, basking in this moment as she finally felt peace wash over her. Starr was certain that she never needed anything but this; she just hated that nobody else could or would see and understand that, that she had to sneak around, shove chairs in front of doors, just to have these moments.

"I'm so glad you're here," she sighed happily, nuzzling her head against his shoulder. Schuyler rested his cheek against the top of her head. "Thank you for coming."

"Like there was anywhere else I wanted to be," Schuyler said warmly, his strong grip on her proving that.

Schuyler pulled back slightly, moving his hand to the back of her neck, and kissed her gently, not wanting to cause her any further pain; despite how light and brief the kiss was, his love for her shined through in it all the same, and Starr couldn't keep from smiling as he pulled away. Even now, on the worst day she'd had in recent memory, being around him for just a few minutes made her so incredibly happy.

"I'm sorry I couldn't see you at the hospital," Schuyler said. Starr rolled her eyes playfully.

"You have got to work on that guilt complex," she laughed, having no idea how true that was, that what the guilt was doing to Schuyler's head right now wasn't a laughing matter. "I'm sorry too, but I mean, we both had people constantly hovering over us, what could we do? Oh, hey- speaking of other people; Cole said he stopped by to see you…? I hope he didn't try to start anything."

"He didn't; he apologized for causing trouble, actually."

'Wow; color me surprised," she muttered, raising her eyebrows. "Did he also tell you about Marty?"

"Yeah; you think she's gonna tell your mom?"

"Unfortunately," she spat in frustration, rubbing her temples, before brightening slightly. "I think my mom might actually be okay, believe it or not. She understands unconventional relationships and not being able to help who you fall in love with. I told her about you, once- I mean, she didn't know I was talking about _you_, of course, but she knew enough- and she told me that if I wanted it and it felt right, I should go for it, even if it would be hard. But you know what? I love my mom, but if she doesn't understand, it won't matter to me any more than my dad's opinion did, she can't stop me."

"Starr, I don't want you doing anything to damage your relationship with your mom because of me," Schuyler said quickly, his voice quiet and rough. Todd, a sociopathic bastard who didn't deserve to be anywhere near Starr, was one thing, but he knew Blair was a genuinely good person, and that she and Starr meant the world to each other. He wouldn't be able to sleep at night if he knew he'd gotten in the way of that.

"No, Schuyler, don't say that," she said, squeezing his hand. "It's like what you say to me when we talk about what _this_ could do to your teaching career- it wouldn't be because of _you_ but because _I_ love you, and that's different. Besides, my mom would eventually see reason, even if it took a while, I'm sure of that; even if I had to go against her for a while, it wouldn't be permanent."

"Starr, you and your mom shouldn't be separated for even as much as a _day_ because of us. If she finds out and she does tell you to stay away from me, maybe you should-"

"Hey, why are we even worrying about this?" Starr cut in. "It's not a guarantee she's going to find out, and I really don't think she'll do anything like that if she does. Can we please just…cross that bridge when we get to it? It's not like we haven't already had enough to deal with today."

"You're right, I'm sorry," he murmured, stroking her cheek. "We'll deal with it later."

Schuyler paused a moment later, realizing something about her seemed different as his eyes ran over her, and he realized what a moment later, frowning deeply.

"You're not wearing your locket."

"I lost it during the scuffle with Zach," she sighed sadly, shrugging. "I know I shouldn't need it as much now since I know Hope is alive and fine, and I mean, I see her myself every week, but having it just…comforts me. Hopefully my dad can find it, but…I don't know, I guess it'll be okay if he doesn't."

"Starr, I'm-"

"If you say I'm sorry to me one more time, I'm going to give you another black eye, and I really don't think you want to teach your class tomorrow looking like a raccoon- oh my God, class!" Starr suddenly gasped, groaning. "I didn't even think about that until right now. I can't believe we have to go to school tomorrow."

Schuyler almost gave a dark laugh at her words before biting it back. 'They' had to go to school? No, _she_ had to go to school, and Schuyler had to teach it. He had to pretend to be nothing her teacher again, at the time when she _most_ needed her boyfriend and not her teacher. Anyone else would be able to stay by her side tomorrow, while _he_ would have to pretend to be indifferent to her more than ever, considering that the entire school was going to be keeping a particularly close watch on them- God, Starr deserved so much better than that.

"Oh, and, speaking of," Starr began, pausing to yawn and remove her books from the bed before sitting on it, motioning for him to join her, which he did. "Don't feel guilty when you have to give me a C for the horrible paper, it's totally deserved."

"Starr, I don't think you could get a C in my class if you tried, you're at a college level already," he chuckled, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. Starr smiled and cuddled into his side.

"Yeah, uh, not this time," she laughed. "I saved your assignment, the essay, for last, because I figured I'd finish it today, but that didn't work out, obviously, so I finished it about twenty seconds before you got here, and it sucks." Schuyler furrowed his brow; his girlfriend had stayed up late after the day she'd had because she had to finish _his_ homework assignment, that just sounded _wrong._

"You know, I can just give you an extension-"

"No, no you can't," Starr interrupted, frowning at him in surprise. "We keep school separate, what are you talking about? You can't give me extra time just because I'm your girlfriend."

"Wasn't planning on it; I can give you an extension because you were hold hostage and put through a traumatic situation today, and any teacher would give you extra time under those circumstances."

"Oh…duh," she giggled tiredly. "Well, in that case, thank you, I'll take it." Schuyler laughed again.

What were you doing writing your paper anyway? You should be resting."

"Oh I'm, uh, not really tired."

"After everything that happened tonight, you're not tired?" Schuyler asked dubiously, looking down at her with a cocked eyebrow. "What is it?"

"This is so stupid," she sighed.

"Starr, come on, you know you can tell me anything," Schuyler encouraged her patiently.

"Yeah, I do," she said with a small smile, gazing up into his eyes. "Okay, um, like I said, it's stupid, but…I'm kind of afraid to go to sleep," she admitted reluctantly. "Just…don't really want to deal with the inevitable nightmares."

"That's hardly stupid; you went through _hell_ today, of course you feel like that." Starr was comforted by his understanding. "But, Starr, you're obviously exhausted. You should at least try to get a few hours."

"I know, I know," Starr muttered nervously, looking at him hesitantly. "If I do, can you, um…can you stay with me?" she asked softly; that was the only way she could imagine getting any rest. Schuyler immediately nodded, his eyes warm and caring.

"Of course."

Schuyler pulled the covers down and laid back with Starr still at his side; Starr used his chest as a pillow, tossing her arm over his waist, and couldn't help but smile when she felt his arms go around her as well, instantly making her feel safe.

"Thanks, Schuyler; I love you."

"I love you too, Starr," he responded, his voice intense with emotion.

Starr took a deep breath, willing herself to just shut her eyes and give in to the fatigue she felt. Her mind conjured up a flash of Zach slamming his lips to hers so roughly, as if it was giving her a taste of what would be waiting for her when she gave in to sleep, and she dug her fingers tightly into Schuyler's side, her body growing tense.

"It's okay, Starr," Schuyler reassured her; he somehow pulled her even closer, so she was practically lying on top of him, and kissed her hair. "You can sleep, baby, I'm right here," he murmured protectively.

Starr smiled softly; Schuyler rarely used pet names like that, but she loved it when he did. Comforted, Starr closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift off.

Schuyler absent mindedly stroked Starr's hair as she slept, just watching her as he got lost in his thoughts; he had a horrible feeling this day was going to change things, for better or worse. Every time he saw the damage he'd caused, the bruise marring Starr's beautiful face, Schuyler was going to remember what this relationship had ended up doing to her, he was going to feel this same guilt, and if it hurt as much every other time as it did right now, it was going to slowly kill him.

How could he keep justifying what he was doing after this? Starr was hurt because of him- she never would have been at Todd's with Zach if she hadn't been protecting him. As if that wasn't bad enough, he'd had to abandon her at the hospital when she needed him most, just like he was going to have to at school in the morning, and instead of resenting him like she should, Starr was already talking about sacrificing her mother for him if it came to that- how could he do this?

These thoughts still weighing heavily on his mind, Schuyler just gave up trying to fight them and unconsciously clutched Starr a little tighter as he drifted off to sleep with a troubled frown on his face.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
Starr was surprised when her alarm clock abruptly woke her up the next morning, hardly able to believe she'd actually slept through the night. Apparently, Schuyler's presence was even more powerful than she realized. Starr struggled to escape his strong arms, startled that he had a death grip on her even in his sleep, and finally managed to squirm away enough to smack her alarm clock off.

She turned back, and just gazed down at Schuyler with a smile for a moment, watching as he slept, but her smile slowly faded as she realized something was wrong; his brow was furrowed, and he looked stressed, disturbed. She hadn't noticed at first, but she now picked up on the quiet murmuring he was doing in his sleep; it was mostly unintelligible, but she picked up on a 'No', 'Stop' and 'So sorry.'

Starr sighed sadly as she understood what was happening; it seemed for once, her presence hadn't been enough to keep away those nightmares.

"Schuyler," she said gently, shaking his shoulder. "_Schuuuyler,_ you have to wake up. Unfortunately, we need to get you out of here before anyone else gets up."

Schuyler stirred from his sleep, blinking wearily, then flashed her an adorable sleepy smile that made her giggle affectionately as he rubbed his eyes.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty."

"Morning," he chuckled, pushing himself to a sitting position as well. "Did you sleep okay?" he asked worriedly.

"Perfectly, not a single nightmare. And I know who I have to thank for that," she said with a loving smile, resting her forehead against his and kissing him warmly.

Schuyler kissed her back tenderly, cupping her chin in his hand; things were just starting to grow more intense when he abruptly pulled back, causing Starr to whimper in protest before she could help herself.

"Wait- does it hurt when I kiss you?" Schuyler asked breathlessly. Starr laughed for a minute at the idea.

"Hardly- it's the only thing that makes me feel better, actually," she said, before winding her arms around his neck and bringing his lips crashing back down to hers, more passionately this time.

To her delighted surprise, Schuyler responded much more forcefully and eagerly than usual, suddenly gripping her hips and yanking her body tight to his as he brushed his tongue across her lips. Starr moaned quietly, pulling herself even closer to him, but unfortunately for her, even though her body wanted nothing but more of this, her mind was wondering what was going on, and began to race, even though it was nearly impossible to think with Schuyler kissing her like this.

There was just something almost…_desperate_ about his kiss, and she couldn't pinpoint why, but it made her more than a little nervous. The nerves worming their way into her heart distracted her from the moment, left her open to other negative emotions, like all the ones from the previous night, and with the reminder of the previous night came the unwanted thoughts of Zach. It suddenly felt extremely difficult to breathe, and for just a second, it felt like Zach's hands on hers instead of Schuyler's, Schuyler's loving kiss felt like Zach's violent one, and Starr felt a momentary rush of fear and panic, suddenly tearing away from Schuyler's embrace.

The room was tense for a moment, silent other than their heavy breathing, and Starr stole a nervous, apologetic glance at him.

"I'm sorry."

"Starr, no, _I'm_ sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

"Yes, you should have!" she said quickly, scooting back over to him and quickly pressing a kiss to his lips to prove she was okay. "I wanted you to, you should have."

Schuyler smiled, but did not touch her again, and Starr tried not to sigh.

"I should go," he said quietly, glancing at the clock. "I have to get to the school."

"I'll see you there."

Schuyler hugged her tightly, then rose from the bed and walked to the window. Starr waited hopefully, and got what she wanted a second later.

"I love you, Starr."

Starr quickly opened her mouth to her reply, but to her surprise, Schuyler swung his lungs out and was climbing down the tree before she could say a word; her stomach dropped to her feet, her mouth suddenly feeling dry as her heart seized tightly. She didn't know _what_ yet, but something was obviously wrong with him.


	14. Chapter 14

Starr breathed a sigh of relief as she shuffled into her last class of the day; finally, it was almost over. The rest of the student body had been gossiping nonstop today, blatantly gaping at her, not even trying to hide their whispers and stares, and since most of the students hadn't heard about Zach, rumors about exactly what had happened to give the three of them these injuries were spreading like crazy. Her favorite that she'd heard today was that Schuyler and Cole had gotten into a fist fight over her, and one of them had hit her when she'd tried to separate them- how did they come up with these things?

Starr took her seat and gazed at Schuler, smiling in relief to finally be near him again, but he was careful not to so much as glance at her, keeping his eyes on his desk, and Starr tried not to sigh in frustration.

The rest of the class started to walk in, and to Starr's disbelief, several of them actually walked right past her desk and blatantly stared at her, before doing the same to Schuyler, buzzing loudly to each other about what could have happened. Starr swallowed roughly, her discomfort obvious, and struggled not to let this affect her.

"Hey, in your seats," Schuyler ordered calmly but firmly. "This is a classroom, you're here to learn, not gossip.

"You heard him people! Move it along, show's over!"

Starr broke into a smile at the sound of Langston's voice, as she and Markko came striding in; Langston had been hovering over her like a mother bear all day, scaring off anyone who dared to stare at Starr or tried to pry. Everyone else quickly took their seats, and Starr turned back to shoot her friend a look of gratitude.

"Thank you, Langston."

"What are best friends for?" she asked with a shrug, quickly shooting a dangerous look to the two girls whispering to each other and snickering as they looked back and forth from Starr to Schuyler.

Starr made it through what was quite possibly the most uncomfortable class of her life, and her shoulders sagged with relief as the bell rang. The rest of the students hurried out of their seats and rushed for the door, eager as always to get home, but Starr remained seated for a moment, not wanting to get caught up in the rush; too many people crowding around her at once would probably make her freak out again.

"I'll meet you out front, Lang," she promised, smiling reassuringly.

Langston nodded and left, and Starr and Schuyler were left alone in the classroom now. She put her things away at a painfully slow pace, watching him carefully, and finally, Schuyler looked up and directly at her. Starr smiled hopefully, and Schuyler returned it, gazing at her warmly with obvious concern in her eyes. Starr breathed easily, her heart growing peaceful- that was all she'd needed. With a small nod to Schuyler, Starr stood and walked out of the classroom.

"Hey, Starr-"

"_Oh my God!_" Starr shrieked at the sudden, unexpected voice, before seeing it was Cole and calming down, placing her hands over her heart as she laughed. "Oh, sorry; wow, holy crap, you scared me."

"I'm sorry," he said softly, looking guilty.

"No, no, it's fine, my fault," she said quickly, shooting him a quick smile. "So, how have you been today? Is your head feeling okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine- you?"

"I've certainly had better days, but it could be worse."

"Good, good," he said awkwardly, reaching into his jacket. "So, uh, I just stopped you because I wanted to give this back to you- I found it on the floor at your dad's last night."

Starr's heart skipped a beat as Cole pulled his hand back, revealing her locket dangling from it; she gasped loudly, her hands flying to her mouth.

"Oh my God," she said in relief, gingerly taking it from him and holding it tightly. "Thank you _so_ much, Cole, I was so upset when I thought it was gone. Can you help me put it on?"

He nodded and took it back, standing behind her and gently moving her hair aside as he wound the chain around her neck and locked the clasp into place. He breathed heavily for a moment, being so close to her having an intoxicating effect on him, but Starr didn't even seem to notice, just turning to face him with a friendly smile.

"Thanks again, Cole."

"After all the crap I've pulled, finding your locket is the least I could do," he mumbled uncomfortably.

Starr smiled, surprised to hear him say that, and impulsively leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Cole in a hug. He held her waist tightly, burying his head against her hair, and Starr just awkwardly patted him on the back, not having realized he would react so…dramatically.

Feeling a familiar tingling in her spine, Starr glanced up over Cole's shoulder, and sure enough, could see Schuyler staring at them as they embraced, his brow furrowed and jaw clenched tightly, eyes burning with an unfamiliar jealousy and insecurity. Starr felt something inside of her go cold, and she quickly pushed Cole away.

"So, uh, thanks again; take care of yourself, Cole, I'll see you later."

Before he could say another word, Starr quickly turned and walked away, already trying to formulate a plan for Langston to help her with; she knew both of her parents wanted her with one of them at all times right now, but she needed time alone with Schuyler now more than ever.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***  
After she, Markko and Langston had managed to convince Todd, Blair and Dorian that they were all going to the movies and then dinner, Starr had hurried to Schuyler's, only to be disappointed when she discovered he wasn't there.

With a resigned sigh, Starr flopped down on the couch, hugging one of the throw pillows as she absent mindedly flipped through the channels on TV, hoping he'd be along soon; she didn't want to be alone right now.

Nearly two hours passed, and Starr was beginning to get worried, when much to her relief, she heard a key in the lock, and quickly flipped off the television and scrambled to her feet so that the second Schuyler walked through the door, Starr flung her arms around him in a tight hug, clinging to him.

"Woah," Schuyler chuckled softly in surprise, putting his arms around her and lightly stroking her hair as he pushed the door closed with his foot. "Wasn't expecting this; what are you doing here, Starr?"

"I don't know, I just…needed to see you," she said, surprised when her voice came out shaky. "I'm sorry."

"Starr, you know you can always come to me, but…aren't your parents expecting you? And don't you have a lot of work to get done?" he asked, his voice strange. Starr nervously licked her lips.

"It's fine, I took care of everything. Where have you been?" she asked quietly. "I've been here for a while."

"I went to visit my mom for a few minutes, and then, uh…" Schuyler's eyes suddenly darkened, and he looked away in shame. Starr frowned.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Schuyler, what?" she pressed, cupping his cheek and turning him back to her. He sighed, his body tense.

"I was with my sponsor," he spat out, sounding disgusted with himself. He tried to pull away from her, but Starr refused, appearing lost.

"Okay," she said softly. "That's fine, there's nothing wrong with that- if you had an…urge, then the only thing that matters is that you went to him. Are you okay, is everything alright?"

"Oh, God," he choked out, tearing himself away from her and stalking across the room. Starr gazed at him in complete and utter confusion. "You shouldn't have to be dealing with this mess, Starr, with my issues; _you_ shouldn't have to be asking _me_ that right now."

"Schuyler, what…what are you talking about?" she asked in frustration, running her fingers through her hair. Schuyler slowly paced to the other side of the couch, keeping his back to her, while Starr remained by the door, her heart beginning to pound uncomfortably.

"I don't think I can do this anymore," Schuyler said brokenly, his voice so quiet she barely heard him.

Starr suddenly stopped breathing for a moment, panic surging throughout her, but quickly ordered herself to calm down, swallowing roughly.

"Do, um, what?" she asked with a nervous laugh, playing dumb. He couldn't possibly mean what she'd just been thinking, there was no way, so there was no reason to worry, right?

"_This,_ us, I don't think I can be in this relationship anymore," he said heatedly, digging his nails into his palms as he turned to face her.

Starr inhaled sharply as tears pierced her eyes, feeling like she'd just been gutted.

"_What?_" she choked out. "Schuyler, where is that even coming from? I know the past couple of days have sucked beyond all belief, but just let that go, we'll get past it together!"

"Starr, you were _assaulted_ last night because of me!" Schuyler exploded, his voice overwhelmed with emotion. "How could I _ever_ just let that go?!"

"What?! Not because of you!" Starr cried, frantically wiping at her eyes. "Because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time!"

"But why were you there in the first place, Starr?" he asked darkly.

"Uh, because my brother is a little sociopath?!" she shouted back sarcastically.

"Because you were trying to protect me from your father," he continued as if he hadn't heard that. "But you know what? You shouldn't have even bothered, because he had _every right_ to want to kill me, to say the things he did and do what he did- what you and I have been doing is _wrong_, and we have just been kidding ourselves!"

"Oh my God," Starr moaned, almost doubling over at the rush of intense pain she felt to hear him call what they had 'wrong'. "Why would you ever say that?! We love each other, Schuyler, what we have is good, and real, it's not _wrong!_ You only feel that way because my dad-"

"Your dad was right, Starr!" he shouted. "I am a messed up drug addict, I am your teacher- I am no good for you!"

"No!" she replied through the tears rapidly spilling over onto her cheeks. "You are a _former_ drug addict, I don't _care_ if you're my teacher, and you are the _best_ thing that's ever happened to me!"

"Starr, if I am the best thing that's ever happened to you, than your life has been even sadder than I thought," Schuyler laughed darkly, shaking his head.

"Why are you doing this?" Starr asked weakly, struggling to breathe. Schuyler took a deep breath, bracing himself, and looked at her with tender, caring eyes, desperately trying to make her understand this was for her own good.

"Starr, you deserve better, why can't you see that? I can't be the best thing in your life, because I am _destroying it._ You deserve to be with someone that doesn't have to keep you a secret, that can take you to your own prom; you shouldn't have to sneak around, have no time with your friends because you're hiding with me!"

"But I want to do those things, it's not like you asked me to!" Starr instantly screamed back at him in frustration.

"No, but you know what? Maybe you only want it because I took advantage of you," Schuyler breathed, bowing his head.

"What?" Starr whispered, horrified.

"You were grieving when we met, Starr, and we were thrown together because of your baby and my mom, and you had nobody to turn _but_ me. And when we actually got together? You were upset over Cole. Maybe I did take advantage of-"

"Oh, God, I _knew_ all of those horrible things my dad and Cole said to you _got_ to you," she said furiously, shaking her head, before trying to appeal to him. "Schuyler, don't listen to that, don't believe it! We've been together and happy so long, you _know_ it's real, it's not something born out of grief or whatever- you _know_ it."

"Even if that's true, everything else still applies!" he fired back. "You deserve someone that doesn't grade your papers; Starr, last night, after going through a traumatic situation, you had to stay up to do my homework assignment, think about how messed up that is. You deserve someone that doesn't have to attend narcotics anonymous meetings and constantly visit his sponsor to keep from falling off the wagon- you shouldn't have to worry about how your boyfriend is handling his drug problem, for God's sake, you have more than enough to deal with as is! You deserve someone whose mother's death you don't blame yourself for, someone that can actually comfort you in public when you're upset! Someone who, if you're going to be attacked because of them, can at least accompany you to the fucking hospital afterwards!" he exploded, though his anger was clearly not directed at her, but himself. "Someone that you don't have to sneak around with when you want to see them, someone who doesn't have to ignore you when you need them the most. Someone _better,_" he repeated, his voice trembling.

"But I don't care about any of that!" she shouted desperately, full out bawling now as she could already see where this was going, and it terrified her. She hurried over to his side, as if she thought touching him could somehow make this all go away, but he quickly backed away from her.

"I do, and you will," he sighed, shaking his head. "Someday, you're going to see that I took advantage of you, and held you back, and put you through so much that you didn't need to deal with, and you're going to resent me- _hate_ me for it."

"Is that what this is about?! You're afraid of that happening? Because it won't, Schuyler, I swear!" Starr sobbed, breaking down to the point of begging as she clutched the couch just to keep from collapsing under this crushing wave of pain.

"This is about doing what's best for you, Starr," he said roughly.

"Schuyler, what did you say to me when my dad left?!" she demanded, trying to turn her heartbreak into fury; if the former didn't get through to him, maybe the latter would. "Do you remember? You said I was _it_ for you, that nothing else mattered!"

"I didn't know what the 'else' was going to be then, I shouldn't have said that," Schuyler muttered.

"So, what, you didn't mean it?!"

"Of course I meant it!" he snapped intensely. "But _I_ shouldn't be _it_ for _you_, Starr. You need to move on, you need to be with someone who can give you what you deserve, that doesn't come with all the baggage I do."

"I don't _want_ anyone else, I never will!" Starr cried, giving up the last of her strength and crumpling to her knees on the floor.

"You don't know that."

"Yes I do, you have no right to tell me what I feel!" Starr shouted furiously, somehow managing to cry even harder. Schuyler fought with himself violently, part of him wanting _so badly_ to just take her in his arms and comfort her, tell her he was so sorry for ever making her feel this way, but he knew he couldn't; if he loved Starr, he had to do this, it would be so much better for her in the long run.

"See, this is part of the problem, Starr! You are too attached to me, it's not healthy!"

"Excuse me for forming an attachment to the love of my life," Starr snapped sarcastically, almost wheezing the words out as she struggled to breathe properly.

"Your life that has only lasted for seventeen years so far, that's exactly my point! And it just makes me think even more that maybe I'm just someone you latched onto when you were desperate and vulnerable, and-"

"Oh my god, stop, please, please don't say that," Starr begged, the tears coming faster than she could wipe them away now, blurring her vision. "You promised not to leave me as long as I still wanted you! You said that you couldn't bear to hurt me again, Schuyler- what do you think you're doing right now?!"

Schuyler took a shaky breath, feeling like his heart had just physically cracked.

"I don't want to be doing this, Starr, you have to believe me, but even though you may _want_ me right now, I'm not what you _need_, and I know I'm going to hurt you a hell of a lot worse if I don't act like a responsible adult and stop this now."

"Schuyler, please, you can't do this, _please._"

"I have to, Starr," he choked out, turning his back to her, knowing he would break if he continued to look at her in this state. "Look, you and I…we're done," Schuyler forced the words out, feeling violently ill as he did. "This is over."

"I love you so much, Schuyler, I love you more than anything- please don't do this," she whispered, her voice raw and scared. She had no idea how much this was tearing him apart, as she could not see Schuyler's heartbroken, crushed expression, only his tense, unmoving shoulders.

"You should go now," he replied softly.

Starr stared at his back in shock, her sobs stopping as well; who was this? Her Schuyler would never be so cold and unfeeling towards her; he wouldn't just turn his back while she was in tears on his floor, literally begging him not to destroy her like this.

She waited in the most tense silence of her life for him to break, fall to his knees beside her and tell her how sorry he was, that he couldn't do this after-all, that he loved her. It was like a standoff from an old movie or something- in the end, he won, none of what she was waiting for ever happened; he remained still and silent as a statue.

The shock numbing her to the pain for just a minute, Starr felt _herself_ break instead and she simply gave up, weakly clambering to her feet and walking to the door without a word; she paused with her hand on the knob, waiting for him to call her back, but he didn't, and Starr despondently left, having no idea that Schuyler broke down the moment the door shut behind her.

In her car, Starr remained in the numbed state for a moment, just driving automatically, her mind and face blank, but slowly felt herself beginning to struggle for air; the toll this had taken on her heart suddenly made it feel hard to breathe, and before she knew it, Starr was hyperventilating, her body shaking so violently she couldn't believe she was still in control of the car. The tears flooded her vision once again, and Starr burst into painful sobs, her heart feeling like it had been shattered to pieces.

Before she even realized what she was doing, Starr abruptly pulled a u-turn and floored it in the other direction, her eyes hard and determined with anger- she knew exactly who was to blame for this, and they were going to see what they had caused.

At her dad's house, Starr jumped from her car and slammed the door without turning off the engine- she didn't intend to be here very long. She pounded on the door with her fist impatiently, and her dad answered a moment later, a confused smile on his face, one that quickly fell as he saw her tears.

"Starr? What's-"

"Congratulations, dad!" Starr shouted through her tears, gasping for breath around her sobs. "Schuyler just dumped me, you win! My life feels like it's over, my heart is broken, so I'm sure you're just thrilled- after-all, everybody knows the only time _you're_ happy is when _I'm_ not!"

"Starr, of course that's not true, I hate seeing you like this, but-"

"Oh, shut up, dad!" she yelled in disgust, furiously rubbing her eyes. "Don't bother lying to me, I don't want to hear a word of it. _You_ did this, and I meant what I said when I warned you; I absolutely _hate you_ for this, don't ever bother trying to talk to me or come near me again," she hissed, spinning on her heel and storming back to the car.

"Starr, I'm only doing what's best for you- you'll thank me for this someday!" Starr turned back and stared at him in disbelief, slowly shaking her head as she gave a bitter laugh.

"Go to hell, dad," she snapped, sliding into the car and slamming the door shut with a resounding thud.

Starr managed to compose herself before she picked Langston up, but was unsurprised when her set, stone face didn't fool her friend; Langston desperately tried to get her to open up and tell her what was wrong, but Starr barely said two words the entire way home- she'd managed to lull herself back to a state of numbness for the moment, and she knew that was the only way she was holding it together. The second she had to talk about it, she was going to fall to pieces all over again.

"Starr, is that you?" Blair called from the living room the moment they opened the door.

Starr opened her mouth to respond, but quickly clamped her hand over it as a lump built in her throat and she desperately tried to swallow it, tears shining in her eyes yet again. Langston gazed at her with intense worry and jumped in.

"Yeah, it's us!" she called back.

"Starr, can you come in here for a moment? I need to talk to you, alone."

"Starr, do you want me to-"

"It's fine," she replied to Langston tightly, stiffly walking into the living room and shutting the doors behind her. Her mom was sitting on one of the big couches, her face kind but serious, and she motioned for Starr to sit next to her, which she did.

"Hey, sweetie; how was your day?" Starr just shrugged, firmly pressing her lips together. Blair frowned, but continued. "Okay, so like I said, there's something we need to talk about. I just got a call from Marty Saybrooke, of all people, and she had something very…interesting to tell me." Starr realized what this was about, and wasn't sure if she wanted to laugh or cry more. "Now she heard this from Cole, and I know he's not exactly a reliable source these days, so I'm just going to ask you, and I want you to know that whatever you tell me is all that matters. I am sure as hell not going to believe Marty Saybrooke over my own daughter, okay?" she said with a wry smile. Starr just nodded blankly. "Okay, Starr…have you been _involved_ with your teacher, Schuyler Joplin?"

"Yes," Starr admitted softly, seeing no point in lying. She didn't want to lie to her mom of all people anyway.

Blair looked stunned, but just like Starr had predicted, there was no judgment or unjustified anger in her eyes either, only the surprise, confusion, and worry.

"Oh, um…okay, wow," Blair murmured, gently giving her daughter's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Okay, well, thank you for being honest, I don't know if I would have been at your age. I'm not mad, I want you to know that," she added quickly, looking nervous and eager to keep up this honesty from Starr. "I just want us to talk now, I want to understand what's been going on. Can you help me with that?"

"Sure," Starr said flatly, her voice practically dead. "You know all the stuff about how Schuyler's mom and Hope were connected, and dad's role in it, I've told you all of that, but I guess what I didn't tell you is that Schuyler and I just formed this…bond throughout all of it. I felt really connected to him right from the start, and the two of us really got each other. I could talk to him about everything, more than anyone else, and he became my go to person, and I don't know, I just…fell in love with him somewhere along the road. At that stupid dance, I lost control and kissed him right in the middle of the hall, and VP Dickinson found out, and he got suspended from his job because of me," she sighed, feeling a rush of guilt.

Schuyler thought he was destroying her life? It seemed like the other way around- no wonder he'd just dumped her.

"He got it back, thankfully, and I kept pushing the issue with _us_; he tried to fight it, mom, he really did, I want you to know that, because he's a really good guy that way. But that day Cole lost it, and got sent to rehab, I ran off to Schuyler's house that night because he was the only person I wanted to see, and he just broke it and couldn't fight what he felt for me anymore, and we've been together ever since. And I mean, we're really serious, mom, it's not a fling or something." Starr realized she should be talking in the past tense now, and the thought made her feel like someone had just ripped a hole in her chest.

"Wow," Blair sighed again. "I can't believe I had no idea this was going on, this whole time. You love him?"

"I really do," she whispered weakly.

"Does he treat you well?"

"So much better than well."

"Does he respect you?"

"God, yes," Starr sighed. Schuyler was one of the few people that had ever really made her feel like an equal to them.

"And he…he loves you back?"

"So he said," Starr choked out, fighting for her composure now. Blair was still distracted by all of this information and didn't notice.

"Well, okay then," she said simply, smiling slightly. "I suppose a teacher wouldn't exactly have been my first choice for you, but I know that you're smart and strong; you are a Cramer woman after-all, you wouldn't do this lightly, and you wouldn't let yourself be taken advantage of, so if you say this is real, I trust that. If he respects you and treats you well, that's all that matters."

"Even that doesn't matter anymore, because he just broke up with me!" Starr choked out bitterly, dissolving into tears.

"_What?_ Sweetie, what happened? I don't understand."

"Join the club!"

"Okay, Starr, just tell me what's going on."

Starr tearfully told her mom everything that Todd and Cole had said and done to Schuyler, everything that had happened at the house with Zach, including her real reason for being there, Schuyler's strange behavior last night and that morning, and finally, every word he'd said to her at his place. Blair listened carefully and patiently, soothingly rubbing her daughter's back.

"Well, Starr, honey, it sounds like he's just a little panicked and confused right now, with everything he's had piled on him the past couple of days, and like he's just trying to protect you."

"It doesn't matter why he's doing it! It doesn't make it hurt any less, it doesn't bring him back to me!"

"Starr, I really think this is just a bump in the road, that you'll be able to get past!"

"But you don't _know_ that, and I'm just…I am so scared that it might just really be over. You have to understand, mom, I really cannot lose him. I mean, his home feels like mine-, no, actually, _he_ himself just feels like home to me. He's the person I go to when I'm scared, sad, happy; anytime something big happens or I _feel_ something big, he's the one I want to share it with. I love him more than I ever thought I could love anyone, mom, I don't want to live without him, I feel like I'm dying," Starr sobbed, collapsing against her mom's lap.

"Oh, sweetheart, it's okay, it's okay," Blair murmured, stroking her hair.

Starr just cried harder- no, it wasn't. It felt like someone had ripped her apart from the inside out, it was pure, screaming agony; this was not and was never going to be okay.

**End Chapter 14**

AN: For the record, I realize in reality no mother would ever be like 'You're dating your teacher? Well, if he loves and respects you, that's fine!", but that's why it's fanfiction, haha :P Don't hate me for the angst!


	15. Chapter 15

Thank you so much for being awesome and reviewing/favoriting, or just plain reading, guys, I really appreciate it!

Things are about to get super uncomfortable, if you all recall a certain event that happened on the show that we're finally getting to here, so prepare yourselves, heh.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

"Starr," Langston murmured gently the next morning, shaking her friend from her sleep. She hated to have to wake her up; she knew Starr had stayed up crying most of the night, and had to be completely worn out.

"Yeah?" Starr mumbled, tossing her arm across her eyes.

"I just wanted to know if you feel up for school today, or if you want me to convince your mom and Dorian we're sick so we can skip it, stay home and have a girls day in or something."

Starr hesitated and moved her arm, blearily opening her eyes. Langston felt her heart break for her friend when she saw how bloodshot Starr's eyes still were from all that sobbing, and felt another rush of red hot anger towards Schuyler; how could he do this to her? Ugh, she'd been right all along- he _was_ a jerk, just not for the reasons she thought. She used to think Schuyler was a jerk because he didn't really have feelings for Starr and was just stringing her along, but now she thought he was a jerk because he loved her _too_ much, if anything, and it made him too damn noble for his own good.

"I want to go," she said softly, glancing at Langston hopefully. "Maybe he's realized he's being stupid, y'know? I have to see him."

"Okay," Langston said simply, biting her lip; she already knew he hadn't. If Schuyler had quit being a dumbass, he would have come over here, or at the very least, called her. He wouldn't be waiting to tell her at school, of all places, like Starr seemed to be hoping.

"My mom said she thinks everything's going to be okay, that it'll work out. Do, you, um…do you think she's right?" Starr asked.

Langston froze. Oh, _crap_, what was she supposed to do here? Lie and make Starr feel better, or be honest and make her feel even worse?

"Ummmmm…who knows, right?" she answered vaguely with a nervous laugh. "Now come on, let's get ready for school!"

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

If there was one small benefit to Starr's heartbreak, it was that it made everything else pale in comparison; all the stares and gossip that had bothered her so much the day before were barely even noticeable now, and while the day had seemed to drag on forever yesterday, it now flew by.

"Okay, Starr; you ready for this?" Langston asked gently as they approached Schuyler's classroom. Starr took a deep breath.

"As much as I'm ever going to be."

"Alright, let's do this!"

Starr braced herself; she wasn't sure what _exactly_ she had in mind, but she was expecting _some_ kind of earth shattering impact from the moment she and Schuyler first saw each other again post… break-up. Oh, God, those words just didn't sound right put together like that.

Starr expected there to be some kind of moment that reflected just how drastically this had shaken her world up, so to say she was left at a loss when she walked through the door and absolutely nothing happened would be an understatement. Schuyler didn't even try to ignore her or anything; she walked in, he glanced up, and just gave a short smile and nod.

"Good afternoon Miss Manning, Miss Wilde. Take a seat."

His voice was calm, his eyes betraying no kind of emotion, Starr slowly blinked, just gaping at him. Langston gently pushed her into her chair, and Starr just continued to stare at him in disbelief. 'Good afternoon, Miss. Manning?' What the hell was that?!

"I graded your papers last night," he addressed the class once they were all in their seats. Uh, he what? Starr was sobbing herself to sleep, and he was grading papers? "It seems some of you are slacking off now that the end of the year is approaching, especially the seniors; I'd like to remind you all that colleges do look at your final semester transcripts, so it would not be in your best interest to drop a grade, now of all times."

He walked past her to hand Langston back her paper, once again not deliberately ignoring Starr but not paying any particular notice to her, and Starr dug her nails into her palms.

"Mr. J," she blurted out, desperate for him to acknowledge her.

"Yes, Miss. Manning?" he asked, his voice even as he turned back to her. Starr swallowed roughly; how did it not seem to hurt him to look at her, the way it hurt her?

"I, um, think I'm going to need another couple of days on that extension."

"Considering your current circumstances, that's fine."

And then he just walked back down the aisle, talking to the rest of the class in the exact same way he'd just spoken to her, and Starr struggled to take a breath, clutching her chest. _That,_ being treated like she was just anyone else, hurt worse than if he had completely ignored her, or acted like he hated her or something. At least that way she would know that she still affected him, she still mattered; feeling like she was insignificant was so much worse.

"Starr? Starr, are you okay?" Langston whispered urgently, noticing her friend suddenly appeared to be struggling to breathe.

"I'm fine," she muttered back, clutching her head between her hands.

"Starr, we can ditch, right now, if you can't-"

"_I'm fine_," she grit out. She _had_ to be convince herself to be fine right now, or she was going to burst into tears in the middle of Schuyler's class, and since she was apparently just another student now, Schuyler was just going to suggest she go to the nurse or something, and she would freaking lose it.

Starr had to put all of her energy into pretending to be okay for the rest of the class; she was so focused on putting on a brave face, pretending his unaffected state didn't affect _her_, that she barely heard a word of the lesson.

"Starr?" Langston murmured at the end of the class, after the bell had rung but Starr remained frozen. "Come on, Starr, time to go."

Starr just nodded blankly and rose to her feet, quickly walking out of the room without pausing to look back; she knew how much it would hurt to see that he wasn't looking back at her.

Langston was ready for the tears to come once they were in the car, was reaching into the glove compartment for the package of tissues she'd stashed there the moment the door shut, but to her surprise, that blank, almost dazed, expression never left Starr's face, and she never cried. Starr just remained silent in the passenger seat, staring at her hands with her face set like stone, and Langston's concern just grew.

The house appeared to be empty when they got there, luckily; Blair and Dorian were dealing with the mess John was in, and hopefully Ray had taken Lola and Starr's brothers out somewhere; she could tell Starr didn't need to deal with anyone right now.

"Do you wanna talk about it, Starr?" she asked gently. Starr wandered to the stairs and took a seat, protectively crossing her arms over herself.

"It's like we never happened," she uttered quietly, to herself more than Langston.

"What?"

"It's like Schuyler and I were never anything," Starr said louder; she finally allowed herself to feel again, and panic was the first thing that came rushing back, even before pain. It drifted into her voice as it quickly seized her heart too. "It's been _one day_, and it's like he's already erasing us!"

"Starr, you two have always kept school separate from the rest of your relationship, so maybe he-"

"No, Langston!" Starr cut her off, eyes wild. "Don't try to make this better, you don't get it! Things are just like they were right before we got together, when he pushed me away and made me think he loved Stacy, when he was treating me like just another student. I can't do this, Langston!" she shouted frantically, tears burning her eyes as she dug her fingers into her hair, looking like she was about to rip it out. "I can't go back to being nothing to him, _I can't!_"

"Hey, Starr," Langston began firmly but consolingly, quickly taking a seat next to her and prying her hands off her head. "You never _were_ and never _could_ be nothing to him, come on, you know that."

"No, I don't, and that's the problem," she said weakly. Starr desperately tried to fight it, but eventually had to blink, and the tears she'd been holding back spilled over; they felt like ice on her skin. "I mean, look at us. He is the most amazing guy, and I'm this whiny, pathetic…clingy," she spat, remembering Schuyler's face when he'd told her she was too attached to him. "little girl, who inevitably drags everyone down with her. Maybe he's just realizing that, and I mean…I could really easily end up being nothing but a footnote in his story," she choked out, burying her head in her hands. "I could be the girl whose name he doesn't even remember in ten years."

"No, you couldn't!" Langston snapped. "Starr, this isn't exactly eloquent, but you rule, okay? You would not be my BFF if you weren't amazing too, and any guy who'd just forget you like that isn't worth remembering."

"That's not true," she muttered, looking back up but keeping her fingers pressed to her mouth as she rocked slightly. "It's not that simple. I _love_ him, Langston, you know what that's like."

"Yeah, I do," she sighed sympathetically. "Starr, look at everything he's done for you- that's gotta be proof that he loves you too."

"Right?" Starr asked nervously. "That's what I want to believe! Which means it can't be over yet, it can't, so I just have to do…something," she finished, furrowing her brow as she rose to her feet and began to pace, struggling to think of what that something could be.

"Starr, maybe you shouldn't-"

"Wait!" she suddenly gasped, a gleam of hope in her eyes. "I already know what I can do- you're the one that said it!"

"Huh?"

"Do you remember what you said to me, when I told you he kept holding back from, um…making love with me?" she mumbled uncomfortably. Langston nodded, furrowing her brow.

"Yeah, but what does that- oh my god, Starr!" she suddenly shouted, jumping to her feet as she got it. "No, time to hit the rewind button! I was kidding, mostly!"

"Well, it's a good idea!"

"Seducing him?! Uh, no, I beg to differ, it's really not!" Langston shrieked. Was she seriously considering this?

"Langston, I have to do _something_ to get to him! I can't just give up and let us be over! If I can just make him give in, he won't push me away again, he can't, and we'll finally just be together completely, like we're supposed to be, and everything will be good again," she rambled wildly, seeming more than a little crazed.

"Oh my God," Langston muttered.

Starr was obviously _losing_ it. She couldn't believe she'd ever thought her friend's feelings for this guy were a passing phase when she loved him enough to lose her damn mind over him like this.

"Starr, I really don't think you should-"

"I'm going," she said decisively, clinging to this idea so desperately, because it was all she had left. "I guess I won't be home tonight, so figure something out for me, okay?"

"Okay," Langston sighed, giving up as Starr dashed out the door.

She didn't bother trying to figure out a plan; she already had a very bad feeling that Starr would be home a lot sooner than she thought.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

"Oh, God, you should have seen her, Ryan; I could tell that I was killing her, and I had to pretend like I just didn't even care, and I felt _sick_, and you know how that was always my excuse to use before," Schuyler sighed, gripping his phone so tightly that it nearly broke as he talked with his sponsor.

"But you called me instead, and that's the important thing. If you're strong enough to avoid it now, you can keep it up, Schuyler. This is going to be a hard time, but just remind yourself that you've gotten through worse without drugs, and you can do it again. Just-"

"Schuy?"

"Oh, damn it," Schuyler muttered in response to the voice outside his door; he'd completely forgotten that last week, he'd left a short message for Stacy, telling her she could come by today to pick up the crap she'd forgotten. "Ryan, I gotta go deal with something. Thanks for hearing me out."

"Of course; any time, Schuyler, day or night."

Schuyler hung up and took a deep breath; putting on act for Starr had drained him of all his energy, he wasn't sure he had enough left to deal with Stacy at this point.

"Hey, Schuyler," Stacy said softly when he opened the door, none of her usual arrogance about her, her typical smirk gone. Maybe having to deal with the consequences of her horrible actions for the first time in her entire damn life, not having him or Gigi there to constantly rescue her, had gotten to her at least a little bit.

"Stacy," he replied shortly, carelessly waving in the general direction of her stuff. "It's all over there, take it and get out."

Stacy seemed stunned as he turned his back on her; she'd probably assumed he'd have forgiven her by now, like he always used to. Well, she was in for a rude awakening.

"Thanks," she muttered, walking over to the box and curiously sifting through it. She brightened up for a moment. "Oh, my nonstop dance party CD, I was looking for that!" Schuyler inhaled sharply; that just made him think of prom night, telling Starr he loved her, and he seriously could not afford to remember that right now. "Thanks for keeping it all for me until I could grab it, Schuy."

"Whatever," he replied tightly, flopping down on the couch. Stacy sighed as she walked over, sitting on the edge of the table in front of him.

"So, are you just going to be mad at me forever?"

"Do you honestly think I wouldn't be justified if I was?"

"Oh my God, Schuyler, I made a mistake- it's not like you don't have some experience with that!" she snapped. He rolled his eyes; so much for that growth.

"Yeah, a mistake you don't seem to feel that bad about."

"You don't know how I _feel_, Schuy, you have no right to judge me!" she shot back defensively.

"I'm not going to fight with you, Stacy, so you might as well just leave."

"I don't want to just leave," she sighed, calming down. "I didn't just come for my stuff, Schuy, I came for you. Look, this whole stupid mess has made me realize Rex wasn't even worth it. What I had with him was a fantasy, it wasn't real…_you_ were the only real thing I ever had," she whispered dramatically. Schuyler nearly snorted; Stacy had always been a good actress. "You and I were real, and good- the best thing that's ever happened to me, actually, and I shouldn't have messed that up, I shouldn't have been chasing Rex when I really loved you. Because I do, Schuy, I love you."

"You are so full of crap, Stacy," Schuyler snapped before he could stop himself.

"Un, excuse me?" she demanded, arching an eyebrow.

"You don't love me. You've finally realized you're never going to have Rex, and for the first time in your life, you don't have anyone to take care of you, so you're alone and scared, and you're turning to your old stand-by. I would be really sad for you if I _actually_ believed you thought what we had was love."

"It was!" she cried. "Don't rewrite history because you're mad at me! Schuyler, just hear me out, okay? You and I can still work things out, we can fix it! And we can be happy and good again, I know it, Schuy."

"Again? We were never happy, Stacy! I was an asshole on drugs, what are _you_ remembering?"

"Hey, you took care of me, Schuy- I mean, you never let me touch the stuff. And…I took care of you too; I mean, remember when you were so sick when your dealer was out of town? I was right by your side! And yeah, things were bad sometimes, but when they were good they were really good, and I was happy. I've been lost ever since we broke up, and I think you and I could be happy again if we were just _together,_" she begged, reaching out for him. "I heard you say your sponsor's name, so I know you must be struggling, just like I am- we can take care of each other again, just let it happen!"

"No, Stacy!" Schuyler exclaimed, quickly rising from the couch and putting distance between them. "Can I make this any clearer to you? We will never happen again, because here's the thing; you _think_ you were happy in Vegas, and you're the same person you were then, but I'm completely different- I'm _ashamed_ of who I was then, like I _should_ be, and I'm not deluding myself about what we were. You and I were two messed up, miserable, self destructive people who turned to each other because of attraction; and, on my part, because you were the one person I ever found who seemed more broken than me, and it made me feel good about myself, it made me develop a savior complex when it came to you- do you not understand how sick that is?"

"I think it's sweet," she responded, shrugging.

"Of course you do," he sighed. "Stace, you think we were good together because neither of us ever called the other out on their shit. You could be manipulative and cruel because I always made excuses for you, made you feel good about it, covered for you so you never had any consequences, and I could use all I wanted, because you never pushed me to change, get better, kick the drugs. We used to call it 'taking care of each other' but I can see now that it was just enabling. And you know why we enabled each other? Because we never actually cared that much. So no, you and I can't be together again, we can't be _happy_ again," he spat, sounding disgusted.

It disturbed him to think that if he had never been with Starr, he might never have come to understand what a healthy relationship was like- he might be agreeing with Stacy that they were good together, that they took care of each other and were happy. It was not a pleasant thought, to say the least.

"You're only saying this because of the girl," Stacy fired back bitterly, his words having just cut her deeply.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"The last time I tried to get you to see reason, you said you were with some girl, and you were happy! Well, who is she?! I'd love to know who the hell you think can compare to me, I really would."

Schuyler clenched his eyes shut, digging his nails into his skin; damn it, why did Stacy have to remind him of that?

"She's not part of this, Stacy; quit looking for excuses, like always. Yes, I love her, more than anyone or anything, but she and I are over. Me not wanting you is about exactly that- _you._ Now please, get out."

Stacy stared at him in stunned disbelief for a moment, then furiously shook her head, yanking her box of stuff off the table and storming to the door.

"Well then, fine, asshole, I don't know what I ever saw you in you either! If you're gonna have that attitude, then have fun dying alone- see if I care!"

Stacy slammed the door behind her, loudly stomping down the hall, and Schuyler released a tense breath, happy to have her gone. God, being around Stacy, particularly when it brought up all those memories of Vegas, like this time had, just made him feel dirty.

With a frustrated sigh over the mess this day had been, Schuyler turned and walked off towards his bathroom, tossing his shirt off as he went; he needed a shower.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Starr took a deep breath, hesitating just as she made a move for the door, yet again; she'd been doing this little dance in Schuyler's hall for a good five minutes now.

She could do this, right? She could totally do this. Totally. Of course she was nervous, she hadn't exactly tried to seduce someone before, but she could do this. There was no way he'd be able to push her away after this, he'd _have_ to own up to his feelings, and that would be worth a few minutes of nerves.

Shaking her head to focus, Starr took a deep breath and walked in through the (unlocked- what the hell was wrong with him, did he _want_ her dad to unexpectedly burst in and kill him or something?) door, shutting it softly behind her and gazing around.

"Schuyler," she called, intending to sound confident and cringing as her voice shook slightly. Yeah, that was real sexy, Starr, way to make the guy want you.

There was no response, and she furrowed her brow; oh, please let him be home, she was going to lose her nerve if she didn't do this soon.

Starr wandered further into the room, and could now hear the shower running; her eyes widened in surprise. Whoa, she hadn't expected this to be _exactly_ like Langston's suggestion, but that worked.

Willing herself not to freak, Starr just leaned against the couch to wait, nervously biting her nails; she felt like she was going to start hyperventilating at any second, which had to be pretty high on the list of things that were not sexy.

Why was she so nervous anyway? Hadn't she wanted this-_him_- for weeks? And it wasn't like they'd never come close before- then again, he'd always stopped, and that was exactly what she needed not to happen this time.

She heard the shower turn off a couple of minutes later, and Starr's heart leapt to her throat as she straightened up, anxiously fussing with her clothes and hair as she waited. Schuyler walked out of the bathroom a moment later-with nothing on but a towel. Starr instantly felt herself blush furiously, her skin suddenly feeling incredibly hot as she fought not to blatantly stare with her jaw on the floor; frankly, it should be her right to ogle her insanely hot boyfriend (or, former boyfriend- no, no, she wasn't going to think about that now), but what if that just made him think again about how young she was? This was probably no big deal for someone like a certain ex girlfriend of his.

"Starr," Schuyler finally spoke after staring at her in shock for a moment; for a second, she could have sworn there was a hint of smile, but it quickly vanished and he furrowed his brow, looking extremely upset she was there.

"Um…hi," she said meekly, forcing herself to smile.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded, clearly uncomfortable, and seeming none too happy about her presence. Starr flinched.

"I just needed to see you, and the door was open, and I heard the shower so I just waited, because, um, we need…we need to talk," she managed, nervously licking her lips as her heart thundered in her chest. Talking wasn't really what she had in mind, but honestly, how the hell was she supposed to jump into this?

"No, we don't," Schuyler snapped. "I said everything I needed to yesterday, and you need to deal with that."

"Deal with that?!" she cried in disbelief, his words pushing something inside of her. Just like that, all of her nerves, the hesitation, all her thoughts were gone, and she was just flying on pure, gut emotions. "How the hell do you expect me to just deal with that?!"

"I don't know, Starr, that's your problem to deal with!" Schuyler shot back, in a panic. He'd gone through absolute _hell_ today in class; it had felt like it was slowly killing him to just pretend she meant nothing, but he'd somehow managed to get through it, put on a good show for her, and she couldn't be here now, he couldn't break and let her see the truth after holding it together so long.

"Why are you doing this?" she cried, her eyes wide and hurt. Schuyler felt like he'd been punched in the stomach, but ordered himself to press on.

"I'm not doing anything I shouldn't have already done a long time ago!"

"Schuyler, I don't-"

"You need to get out," he interrupted harshly, walking around her towards the door.

"No! Schuyler, you can't just pretend that you're just my teacher, that I'm just your student, we can't do that!"

"Why not? We never should have been anything more than that, Starr, it was a mistake on my part!"

"Oh my God, quit saying that!" Starr yelled in frustration, covering her ears for a moment.

"It was!" he repeated, viscerally hating himself for what he was doing to her. "You are a seventeen year old child, Starr, and-"

"_What?!_" she suddenly shrieked; at that moment, Starr was pretty sure she actually _heard_ her brain break or something, felt her sense just go flying out the window. "How can you say that?! After everything we…I am not a child!" she snapped, impulsively grabbing her shirt and tossing it over her head.

"Starr!" Schuyler groaned, feeling an involuntary rush of heat and forcing himself to look away; oh, God, what the hell was she doing?

"I am so _not_ a child," Starr continued rambling wildly, crossing the room so she was in front of him and he was forced to look at her. "I mean, I've…I've been with a man, I've had sex, big deal!" she spluttered; that seemed Stacy-ish enough, and based on the stories she'd gotten him to reluctantly share about life in Vegas, it certainly sounded like he'd wanted _her._

"Yeah, and what happened, Starr?" he responded, all but covering his eyes with his hands. "It ended in complete disaster!"

"But that won't happen, that won't happen this time!" Starr rushed to promise, her smile appearing far more crazed than reassuring, as she'd intended. "I mean, this is _us_, that won't happen with us! It won't happen. I just…I want you," she breathed honestly, daring to step closer, place her hand to his warm skin. Schuyler suddenly gripped her wrist tightly, pulling her away from him.

"No, this is not happening." Starr had no idea that was directed as a reminder to himself far more than it was to her. "And you need to get over it, right now. Just…put your top on," he muttered uncomfortably.

His eyes involuntarily flickered downward, and Schuyler abruptly let go of her and spun around, pacing away from her as his breathing increased. Starr couldn't help her smirk of satisfaction; she knew it, he wanted her too.

"Why? _Why?_" she snapped louder when she received no answer. Schuyler finally glanced at her again, and Starr desperately tried to calm down from her high energy, manic state, trying to reason with him. "Schuyler, you and I have come so close to this so many times, and we always just stopped ourselves, but _why?_ I just don't want to stop this time! I want…I want you to make love to me," she blurted out, not caring that her tone was borderline begging.

Schuyler gripped the back of the couch so tightly that it turned his fingers white, unable to let her see his face right now; had he somehow already made her believe that wasn't what he wanted too, more than anything? She truly had no idea that while he was telling her to get out and get over it, all he really wanted to do at this moment was carry her off to his bed and make love to her for hours, make her _feel_ the extent of just how much he loved her, so nobody, not even he himself, could ever make her doubt his feelings for her again.

"This isn't happening, Starr," was all he said, his voice low and firm as he gave her a cold look. "You don't even really want this!" he added, recalling Starr's frightened reaction the last time they'd kissed. "After what Rosen-"

"I don't care about that anymore!" she shouted in frustration. God, why would he even mention that, _now_ of all times? Unless…did it bother him? Did seeing Zach touch her make her as disgusting to him as it had made her _feel_ that night? Tears blurred her vision at the thought, and without even realizing what she was doing, Starr moved her hands to her jeans, fumbling with the button and starting to pull them down. "_You_ are all I care about right now, and I just want-"

"Starr, I am not having sex with you," Schuyler hissed, crossing the room until he was so close you couldn't have fit paper between them, yanking her pants back up before storming away. Starr struggled to breathe, his proximity making her head feel a little dizzy.

"But you want to, right?!" she demanded. For just a moment, there was a flash of _something_ in Schuyler's eyes, there was _something_ about the way they quickly swept her over, that made Starr certain she was right, and she desperately pressed on. "I really think you do!"

"You're seventeen, Starr," he grit out through his teeth. "And everything I said yesterday still matters."

"Schuyler," she sighed weakly, approaching him again. "You…you know better than anyone that I'm older than my years; I've already been through more than most people deal with in a lifetime, it grows someone up! I…I don't care about yesterday, this is now. Right now, just say it, say that you don't want me, and I'll leave."

Schuyler turned to face her, jaw set and eyes determined; if that was the final push she needed to move on, fine, he'd do it, he'd lie right to her face so she could be better off.

But the moment he looked into her emotional, pleading eyes, his resolve crumbled, his shoulders sinking; God, he was such a bastard. He could cause her more pain than anyone ever should, right up until the moment that it would end it all for good- what the hell was wrong with him?

"I thought so," Starr murmured, suddenly throwing herself at him and slamming her lips to his.

She wound her arms around his neck and yanked him down closer, kissing him roughly, forcefully, not at all like she usually did. Schuyler's walls went shattering to the ground, his defenses and restraint all torn to pieces, and with a muffled groan, Schuyler finally gave in, kissing her back eagerly. His hand moved to the small of her back, crushing her body to his, and Starr shivered pleasurably over the feel of his bare skin on hers, a quiet moan escaping her.

The sound jarred Schuyler back to reality and he pulled back so quickly that Starr nearly fell. He gazed at her with wide, disbelieving eyes for a moment, then quickly turned away, the sound of her still heavy breathing and sight of her tousled hair more than he could take at the moment. Repeat, what the _hell_ was wrong with him? Now he had no choice in this but to do the one thing he'd wanted to avoid, and destroy both their hearts in the process. He at least had the comfort of knowing Starr's would eventually heal when she saw he was right, moved on to someone better; he imagined his would only get worse with time, though.

"Get out, Starr," he ordered one last time, hoping she might leave it at that.

"After that? No, I'm not going anywhere," she declared, her heart still racing from that kiss.

"Look, Starr, I didn't want to do this. I tried to end things gently, in a way that wouldn't make you feel so bad, but it looks I have to be honest now," he began darkly, gazing at her with cold, unemotional eyes. "Do you realize that it's not like you haven't given me the opportunity to do this before? That it's not like you haven't thrown yourself at me before? I'm just not interested, and I finally realized I can't keep pretending that I am. I am truly sorry that I misled you all this time, but I just can't lie to myself anymore; I care about you as a teacher, as your friend, but that's it. I got too involved when we were thrown together, when we were both lonely, and grieving, and it made me feel something that wasn't actually there, and now that I've had time, I can see that…I just don't want you."

"That's not what you said," Starr whispered to herself desperately, clenching her fists as she fought not to burst into tears for what felt like the thousandth time the last few days. "You're lying. You could have said it a minute ago, but you didn't, you _didn't._"

"Starr! _I don't want you!_" Schuyler shouted, his voice hard and angry. Starr shrank back, her eyes stunned and pained; he'd never spoken to her like that before, ever. "Can I make that any clearer?!"

Starr just froze for a moment, gazing at him with a completely _crushed_ expression, and then simply gave up, every ounce of hope, determination, belief, strength, fight, evaporating from her. Her head hung low, Starr just walked past him to the door, swallowing roughly. She paused for just a moment once it was opened, gazing at the floor.

"Sorry I bothered you," she uttered, her voice soft and dazed.

And then she was gone.


	16. Chapter 16

Langston came rushing out from the living room the instant she heard the front door open, having been waiting ever since Starr left nearly two hours ago for her friend's return.

She'd been wishing she'd fought harder to stop Starr ever since she'd left, worried that things were going to turn out horribly, and the instant Starr walked through the doorway, Langston felt her heart plummet, and knew her fears had been confirmed.

Starr had only her camisole on, her jeans were still unbuttoned, her hair a complete mess, and she seemed completely unaware of these things as she just blankly walked to the steps without a word.

"Starr?" Langston asked, dying to know exactly what had happened.

"Just don't," she ordered without slowing her gait, her voice rough.

Langston did as her friend requested and didn't say a single word more, simply following her up the stairs and to her room, cautiously, just wanting to be certain Starr would be okay tonight.

She watched as Starr tiredly climbed into her bed without changing clothes and just lied there, miserably staring at the wall. It was somehow sadder than if she'd come up here and burst into sobs, and Langston felt a rush of anger on her friend's behalf; she was seriously going to kick Schuyler Joplin's ass for this.

"Starr-"

"Langston, I don't know if I can talk about it," Starr whimpered, feeling as though her heart had been brutally ripped right out of her chest.

"Well, can you just try? I mean, Starr, what…where's your shirt, what happened? Did you guys really…um?" she finished awkwardly, widening her eyes and tilting her head.

"No, trust me," Starr snorted, laughing darkly. "We definitely did not _um._ I threw my shirt off, almost took my pants off, and literally begged him to, but he…he just told me to get out, that it wasn't happening, and when I wouldn't leave it alone, he got _so_ upset, and he…he told me that he didn't want me," she choked out.

"He _what?_" Langston demanded in shock.

"Oh, yeah; Schuyler said that the two of us being thrown together because of our grief made him feel something that wasn't really there, and that he doesn't want to hurt me because he cares about me as a friend, but he can't pretend to feel something he doesn't anymore, and then that's when he told me he doesn't want me," Starr spat, her voice trembling.

"Oh my God," she muttered in disbelief. "I'm sorry, Starr, I am _so_ sorry."

"Yeah, me too," she mumbled disheartened.

"So, he basically said that he was confused about his feelings but realized he doesn't really love you, that he doesn't want you?"

"Yes," she snapped, on edge. Just saying it made her feel like she was being stabbed.

"Oh, that is such bullcrap, Starr," Langston snorted, rolling her eyes dismissively.

"What?"

"Please, he's so full of it! You don't risk your entire career- no, literally your friggin' _life_, like Schuyler did with Zach and even your dad- for a girl, if you're not pretty damn sure that you love her. Schuyler's just being all Edward Cullen right now, like when he tells Bella he doesn't want her and leaves because he thinks she's better off. Or like Angel in that episode of Buffy where he dumps her and tells her he doesn't want her life to be with him because he thinks she's better off. Or Stefan in the Vampire Diaries novels when he's making Elena think he hates her so she'll stay away because he thinks she's better off," Langston added, furrowing her brow slightly for a moment before smiling playfully. "Huh. Oh, look, here's our answer to his behavior; Schuyler is clearly a self-loathing vampire. Wow, he hides it so well, too," she remarked, shaking her head. Starr almost cracked a smile. "We just need to put your life in danger, that seems to be how everyone else solves it."

"Maybe we could come up with another solution?" Starr asked, trying to take her mind off of the horrible events by playing along with Langston. "Because I think I've had enough dangerous experiences for a while."

"We'll put our heads together, think of something," Langston promised, smiling. "I also promise it'll be better than the last suggestion I made to you." Starr sighed, the sorrow returning full force to her eyes, and Langston winced. "Starr, I really don't think you should act like this is a lost cause already," she told gently, her tone hopeful. "I mean, he's already done this once- right before you guys got together, remember? Told you were causing too many problems for him, that what you thought you guys had wasn't real, that he loved Stacy. He admitted he was lying then to push you away, and if you ask me, it's obviously what he's doing now; none of this is because he doesn't love you, it's because he loves you _that_ much."

"I don't think so, Langston," Starr said softly, her voice haunted. "You didn't…you didn't see him. When he did all of that, back before we together, it hurt, yeah, but a part of me didn't believe it; I think something inside of me just knew something was up, that he didn't really feel that way. And that feeling's not there this time; it just feels like it's _over,_" she choked out. "I keep picturing the way he looked when he said he didn't want me, and oh, _God_, he looked like he hated me, Langston, or like he was disgusted with me. Schuyler has never looked at me that way before, he's never sounded like that before."

Tears splashed onto her pillow, and Starr furiously rubbed her eyes; ugh, she was like a leaky faucet these days, it was pathetic. Was that how he saw her? If girls like Stacy were his type, that certainly must have turned him off.

"Starr, maybe he's just a really good actor," Langston tried weakly.

"Doubtful, but Lang, even if you were right, would it matter? If he's just made the decision to lie to protect me, he still seems pretty set in it, I don't think I can make him change his mind. Either he's extremely determined not to have me, or he honestly doesn't want me, and I just don't know what to do," she finished brokenly.

Langston nervously licked her lips; this clearly didn't seem like usual, high school girl, 'Oh no, my boyfriend didn't ask me to the prom and now we're totally over' angst, which she was good with; this was something a lot deeper, something she hadn't personally experienced, and she wasn't sure how to deal with this.

"Hmm, let's see, how to deal with the self loathing vampire in your life," she began playfully, deciding to go for trying to make her laugh. "Wouldn't that be an awesome self-help book? Well, I would say handle it like Buffy, because she rules, but you have no vampire slaying to pour your attention into and I really doubt you want to hook up with some random dude, so no. You already tried seduction like Elena, and phase two involves being assaulted at a graveyard by the jerk on the football team who's also a werewolf, so, uh, let's pass. Huh, guess that means we only have one choice- I'll go find you a Jacob now." Starr laughed quietly, her eyes lightening slightly.

"Who do you think you are?"

"Hey, before you get fresh, let's be clear on something- when I say I love you, I mean as a friend."

"Shut up," Starr laughed louder this time. "I just meant the whole personal sun thing or whatever. That's you. Thank you, Langston. I'm sure my constant whining must be annoying, but I-"

"No, it's not, and I'm always here to help, you know that, "she said with a smile, nudging her shoulder. "Just don't go jumping off any cliffs, okay? You already did that one."

"Promise."

"So, you've got a busy day tomorrow, right?" she asked encouragingly, figuring it would take her mind off the pain. "Aren't you going with Jessica to Hope's check up?"

"Yeah," she said, appearing a bit more cheerful. "Me and Cole; I think it'll be really nice. You wanna come?"

"Yeah, sure! Always fun to see my honorary niece, or…whatever Hope is to me," Langston laughed, shaking her head. Starr smiled slightly.

"You're not busy with Markko, right?"

"Nope, tomorrow's free."

"Cool, it'll be good to have you there. Hey, so, speaking of, what's going on with you, Markko, everything? Can we talk about you and your problems? I'm sick of me, I'm sick of thinking about everything, I'm sick of crying."

"Umm…you're gonna hate me for this, but I don't really have any problems, things are good right now. Lola and I have really been getting along, and so are she and Markko, I think the three of us are good."

"Wow, really?" Starr asked in surprise. "I gotta admit, I'm still not crazy about Lola. She just gives me a weird vibe."

"I know, I know, she can be a little off-putting, but I think she's just misunderstood. Maybe the three of us could have a girls night sometime, you two could get to know each other better."

"Sure; not like I have anything else to do now," she muttered to herself, miserably, the small light that had returned to her eyes instantly being extinguished.

Langston just sighed sadly, deciding even more firmly that the second school was out and he was no longer responsible for her grades, she was going to give Schuyler the ass kicking of a lifetime.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**  
"Hope, who's that? Do you see who that is over there?"

The next afternoon, Starr's head shot up at the sound of the familiar baby talk and she grinned when she saw Jessica cradling Hope, feeling a flash of true happiness for the first time since Schuyler had climbed out her window that morning.

"Hey, Jessica!" she chirped, quickly getting out of her seat in the waiting room and walking over. "Hi, Hope," she cooed, rubbing her finger over her little hand. Hope giggled, grasping her finger. Langston followed behind her, lightly tickling the bottom of Hope's feet, and all three girls grinned when she laughed.

"Hey, girls; you're here early."

"So are you," Langston pointed out with a grin. Jessica smiled sheepishly.

"Just excited for my first big check up with my little girl here. Cole's not here yet?"

"No, he called to say he's running a little behind and will be here soon. Thanks again for letting us all come, Jess."

"Of, of course, I'm just- oh my god," Jessica reflexively blurted out as Starr straightened up; when she'd been bent over Hope with her hair falling in her face, she'd been unable to see the still pretty severe bruising along her cheek. "Wow; you went through even more than I heard. I'm sorry, sweetie." Starr just shrugged, trying not to think about that night too much. "Lucky your teacher was there, huh? I guess we're all kind of indebted to him now." Starr inhaled sharply, firmly telling herself to focus on Hope right now and ignore that throbbing sensation in her chest.

"Guess so," she replied tightly, clenching her jaw.

"Hey, um, so…how do you think Hope's gonna take to her doctor?" Langston interrupted awkwardly, shooting Starr a nervous look. "Is she going to be one of those babies that freaks out, or loves the attention?"

"Oh, knowing this little spotlight hog?" Jessica asked with a warm giggle, kissing Hope's forehead as they all began to walk back over to the waiting room chairs. "Definitely the latter."

"I bet you're right; she is quite the little ham, isn't she?" Starr asked affectionately, walking backwards as she talked to them

"Probably doesn't help that Brody already treats her like she's queen of the universe," Jessica remarked with a giggle. Langston and Starr exchanged a playful look, both 'ooohing' in unison.

"Speaking of, where is _Brody?_" Starr asked with a grin, singing his name in a cloying tone. Jessica rolled her eyes in good nature, laughing.

"He's with Bree right now."

"How are things with you two?" Starr asked, hoping hearing about somebody else's happiness would perk her up instead of backfiring and making it worse.

"Really great," Jessica said softly, practically glowing. "_Really, really_ great."

"Aw, I'm so glad to hear that, Jess. You really deserve-"

Right before Jessica could warn her to watch out, Starr felt herself suddenly collide with someone, and she quickly whipped around, blushing and smiling sheepishly.

"Oh my gosh, I am so…sorry," she trailed off breathlessly as she discovered it was Schuyler, of all people, that she had just bumped into.

Starr's heart quickly leapt to her throat as Schuyler gazed at her for a moment, his eyes unreadable, and then gave a strained smile, bowing his head.

"Sorry, Starr."

Hope picked her head up from Jessica's shoulder in response to the familiar voice, peering over, and much to the shock of everyone in the room, she suddenly let out a happy little squeal when she saw Schuyler, stretching out her little arm.

For a moment, the room was still and silent, the tension so thick it could have been cut with a knife, as Starr and Schuyler both looked like they were about to break down, but it quickly passed. Schuyler swallowed roughly, stiffening, and just turned to walk away.

"See you girls in class," he muttered, his voice sounding agonized to Langston, but icy cold to Starr.

"Class?" Jessica repeated softly, glancing between them. "Oh, was that the teacher?"

Starr unconsciously clamped her hands over her heart, pressing her lips together so tightly that it hurt, as she focused on her breathing, willing herself to remain as unaffected as Schuyler apparently was. God, and Langston actually thought he was faking it? She was unwillingly filled with memories of that first time Schuyler had met Hope, and she furiously pinched the bridge of her nose, desperate to keep it together.

"Starr? Are you okay?" Jessica asked, furrowing her brow when neither girl answered her previous question.

"Yeah, I'm uh…fine," she managed to get out, though she sounded anything but.

"Okay, well, why don't we-"

"Um, I'll be right back," Starr suddenly blurted out; a small part of her wanted to know just what the hell she thought she was doing, but the rest was simply flying on instinct. "I'll be back before it's time for us to go in, I promise."

"Okay, that's fine," Jessica replied, obviously completely and utterly lost right now.

Starr spun on her heel, following after Schuyler, but Langston quickly grasped her arm, her face overwhelmed with concern.

"Starr, maybe you shouldn't-"

"No! You know what? He doesn't get to just walk away or ignore me again, he's going to hear me out whether he likes it or not," she hissed.

Starr quickly left, and Jessica watched her go with a confused frown.

"Uh, Langston, what's going on?"

"To be honest, I'm not completely sure myself."

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Starr had no idea that Schuyler was far from unaffected; actually, as he quickly stormed through the hospital, he was all but having a panic attack.

This had been a simple enough plan in theory; make Starr believe he didn't love her, let her move on, bury his feelings, there, done deal. But in practice, it was not so damn simple; ignoring Starr in class, having to treat her the way he had and say the things had did, had torn his heart to shreds already, and he had come so close to breaking right now, especially in the face of Hope. It was becoming increasingly obvious that he was not going to survive a month at this rate.

He never should have told Starr that 'of course' he'd meant all the things he'd said to her; he shouldn't have left the slightest chance for her to cling to; he should have done something to make her hate him so viscerally that they'd never be in this position- where their relationship couldn't be allowed to continue, but wasn't quite dead yet either, just sort of…suffering, gasping for air as it clung to life.

He supposed he could just leave town himself, but, truth was, he knew was far too selfish for that; even if he would always just pining, having to watch what he couldn't have, being around Starr was worth it; he couldn't bear the thought of not being in her life at all. He just needed to figure out some way to keep himself away from Starr, create some barrier between them, before he ruined everything.

"Oh, hey, Schuyler!"

Schuyler stopped, glancing up irritably as Kyle waved him over from one of the exam rooms. He'd never liked Kyle; he knew it was unfair, the other man really hadn't done anything to deserve it, but it was just a feeling he got from him.

"Hey, Kyle," he said politely, walking in; he promptly froze in his tracks when he saw Stacy standing near Kyle. She pursed her lips, looking away.

"Just wanted to ask how the hand is."

"Good," he muttered, absently tapping his fingers against the cast. Stacy continued refusing to look at him. "Hey, Stace," he said finally, waving in her general direction.

"Relax, I'm not stalking you," she abruptly snapped. "I'm just here talking to Kyle- the one person in Llanview that doesn't think they're Jesus, going by the way the rest of you constantly judge me!"

"Well, I'll just leave you two alone," Kyle muttered, quickly fleeing from the room at the first sign of confrontation. Schuyler rolled his eyes; anyone with eyes could tell Kyle had a thing for Stacy, but she would obviously eat the poor guy alive within the first week.

"Look, Stacy, I don't want to fight with you again, I just wanted…"

Schuyler slowly trailed off, cocking his head as it hit him. _Stacy._ Stacy, his ex-girlfriend, whom everyone, specifically Starr, knew he'd supposedly loved at one point. If he did this right, it wouldn't be so hard to make everyone believe old feelings had resurfaced…

Schuyler felt a rush of intense guilt and shame for what he was about to do; Stacy would be fine in the end- regardless of how he felt about the girl, he wouldn't even consider this if he thought it might actually hurt her, but, oh God, _Starr_…

_No,_ no, he wasn't going to talk himself out of this; what might hurt her now was the kindest thing for the long run, he had to remember that.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry for yesterday," he murmured earnestly, resisting the urge to darkly smile to himself; it had been so long that he'd forgotten he could put on just as good a display as Stacy.

"You know what, Schuy, you can just- wait, what?" she asked, startled. Schuyler took a breath and stepped closer to her, ignoring his stomach twisting uncomfortably.

"I said a lot of things to you that I didn't mean yesterday," he sighed. "I _wanted_ to mean them, I wanted to believe I was over you, but I couldn't stop thinking about you after you left, it was killing me, and I think I realized I'm _never_ going to be over you."

"If you didn't mean it, why'd you say it?" Stacy asked cautiously, already softened.

Had Schuyler been capable of feeling anything but this crushing anguish over the lie he was about to tell her, he would have felt bad for Stacy, he truly would have; the fact that she was obviously about to take him back, after just a few flowery words, all of one day after he had told her he loved another girl more than he ever had her, essentially called her a terrible person, and told her their former relationship had been screwed up and meaningless, was just _incredibly_ depressing, really.

"Look, do you remember back when I asked you to pretend to still be my girlfriend, so I could send a message to one of my students?"

"Yes…"

"That's who the girl is, the one you were asking about yesterday, but-"

"Oh, what?!" she shrieked. "That's who you chose over me?! A fucking high school girl who probably hasn't even mastered missionary yet? That's great, Schuy, that's just great." Schuyler clenched his fists tightly, swallowing his instinctive response to that.

"I didn't choose her over you, that's the problem! Look, Stacy, you were still hung up on Rex, and Starr and I were thrown together because of outside circumstances, and it just seemed easy to turn to her."

Stacy instantly softened, the thought of Schuyler pining away for her, her breaking his heart because of her obsession with Rex, getting to her just as he'd known it would. Stacy thought she was the queen of manipulation, but a part of Schuyler that he was ashamed of was pretty sure he had even her beat.

"I wanted to love her, and I wanted to forget you, but I've finally figured out that...I don't know, the heart just wants what it wants. I only lied to you because I didn't want to hurt Starr, and I didn't want to _be_ hurt by you again, but-"

"Oh, Schuy," Stacy sighed happily, lighting up. "I knew you'd come to your senses."

She suddenly threw herself at him, winding her arms around her neck and kissing him, and Schuyler violently fought his natural gut reaction to push her away, forcing himself to kiss her back like he meant it, even as it made him feel sick to his stomach. Closing his eyes and pretending she was Starr didn't even work; her frame was too boney, her skin too cold, her kiss too forceful.

Schuyler was completely unaware that while he was thinking he was just casting Stacy's part in all this, that the real work was still to come, in actuality, the show had already begun- because right outside the exam room door was Starr, watching in silent horror.

Rather than feeling like her heart was bleeding, broken, or stomped on even more, Starr simply could no longer feel it at all; there was just an empty, cold feeling in her chest where her heart used to be. It quickly spread to her lungs, choking her, and Starr quietly struggled for air, her mind going blank to accompany the numb sensation in her body.

"Starr? Everything alright?"

Starr managed to tear her eyes away from the earth shattering sight in front of her, and saw Kyle gazing at her in worry.

"Huh?" she asked slowly, the fact that her brain had just completely shut down keeping her from processing his question.

"Are you okay, Starr?" he asked again in concern. "I know you took quite a blow to the head, is it bothering you?" He reflexively put his hand on her shoulder in a comforting gesture, but Starr flinched, quickly shrugging it off.

"I'm fine," she muttered tensely, abruptly spinning on her hell and storming down the hall and back to the waiting room, where Cole finally was now, seeming to be waiting for her.

"Hey, Starr! The doctor just came out a second ago, I just wanted to wait for you. You excited for our first check up with Hope? Can you believe she's already…Starr?" he asked slowly, finally picking up on how upset she was. "You okay?"

Starr stared at her feet and swallowed roughly, trying to remind herself how to speak; what she had just seen and heard had destroyed her so thoroughly that even basic, natural functions seemed impossible.

"Uh-huh," was all she managed. He furrowed his brow.

"Uh, yeah, 'cause you really look it. Starr, what's-"

Without a word, Starr abruptly crumpled into Cole's arms, holding him tightly as she burrowed her head against his shoulder, just trying to block out the world. Cole stiffened, seeming shocked for a moment, but then quickly reacted, holding her tightly and cautiously rubbing her back.

"Hey, it'll be alright, Starr, it's going to be fine. Just tell me what-"

"No," she muttered, pulling out of his embrace the moment he started to ask. Her voice was startlingly empty. "I can't, okay? Let's just go see Hope, that's all I want right now."

She quickly breezed past him, and Cole watched her with suspiciously narrowed eyes, having a damn good feeling there could only be one cause of that kind of pain for her. If Schuyler Joplin really had screwed this up after what Cole had done- swallowing his pride and agreeing to back off for the sake of Starr's _happiness_- he was really going to kill that guy.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

*Fearfully burrows back into hole* I'm going somewhere with this, I promise! Lol. I'm not crazy about this chapter, but I didn't want to make you guys wait anymore. I promise the next one is more exciting, and that I'll have it up MUCH sooner. To give you all a sort of sneak peek at what's coming; if I named my chapters, the next one would definitely be called 'Girl Fights.' ;)


	17. Chapter 17

The next few days after the run in at the hospital were…rough, to say the least. Somehow, they always managed stumble upon Stacy and Schuyler together (they didn't realize this was exactly Schuyler's intention), no matter where they went; Langston wasn't certain how she and Cole had managed _not_ to murder the duo everytime they saw that heartbroken, crushed look in Starr's eyes when she saw them together.

At school, Starr was unknowingly playing right into Schuyler's plan, reacting exactly the way he'd hoped she would after seeing him with Stacy; she treated him like nothing but a teacher, put on a brave face and gathered everything she had in her to put on a show of being together and composed, and never acknowledged him anymore. Starr believed it was what he wanted, of course, but truth was, Schuyler was slowly dying thanks to their separation, just like her. Truth be told, even though he'd been the one to make things this way, Starr's lack of acknowledgment towards him cut Schuyler deeply. It felt like having déjà vu sometimes, like he was reliving that horrible day after Cole snapped and threw his books at her, when Starr came to his class, bruised and broken, and he couldn't offer a word of comfort or protection, because he had to be nothing but her teacher- and that's all he was now. It was like _they_ had never happened, and it absolutely terrified Schuyler; if it weren't for how vividly he could still recall her touch, her kiss, for the fact that her shirt was still balled up on the corner of his floor (the way he'd been avoiding acknowledging it, you'd think the shirt burned if touched or something), he might have to ask her if it all had been some delirious dream he'd had.

Away from Schuyler himself, Starr was a different story. After an intense crying fit the first day, Starr had swallowed the pain, and more or less seemed like a zombie now; she just went through the motions, and wasn't so much _living_ as merely _surviving_. It was the best she could do, and even just getting out of bed in the morning and facing the guy she was so still so helplessly in love with at school took all the strength she had. Even Blair, who had been so distracted by John and Marty being on the run, couldn't miss the numb, broken look in her daughter's eyes. Starr tried to keep up appearances, and usually managed to make it through the day, but you never knew when some little comment, such as Blair asking her where she'd learned to cook when Starr impulsively made dinner for everyone, was going to completely set her off.

It worried Langston to see how Starr was sleepwalking through her life. Pretty much the only time she ever showed any genuine emotion was when she was scribbling in that long letter of hers to Schuyler; Langston really wished Starr would eventually send it, but apparently, she had no intention of it. Starr had explained that it was some therapeutic technique, to write out your feelings to someone in a letter that you would never send, since the fact that nobody would ever read it but you made you really pour your heart out. (Ironically, Schuyler had been the one to tell her about this little practice). Starr had written just a little note to Schuyler the first time a particularly powerful wave of missing him had hit, but it had been the only thing since he'd dumped her to make her feel the slightest bit better, and it become a habit, until the letter grew to multiple pages in length. Now, whenever Starr had a particularly strong emotion towards him- anger, heartbreak, longing, whatever- she pulled out the letter and just wrote from the soul until she managed to swallow the emotion and put her mask back on.

Right now, Starr was curled up in the fetal position on her bed, covers pulled over her head as she just tried to block out reality; that stupid paper she'd had an extension on was due today, which meant her usual method for dealing with Schuyler's class- keeping her eyes on the floor and focusing her attention only on the technical side of his words, ignoring what the sound of his voice always did to her- wasn't going to work. She was going to have to actually interact with him, talk to him, look at him, and she had no idea how she was even going to survive this.

"Starr?"

Starr sighed as she heard Langston's cautious voice as her friend entered the room; she hated how everyone in this house walked on eggshells around her, like they were afraid she was going to fling herself out a window or something at any possible moment. Even her mom, who had more than enough to worry about and barely understood the current situation, was constantly hovering and practically removing all sharp objects from any room Starr was in.

"Yeah, Lang?" she asked flatly, tossing the covers off. Langston glanced at her in surprise when she saw that Starr was dressed and ready; she hadn't been sleeping in, just hiding out.

"Just wanted to ask if you're ready for school."

"As much as I'm ever going to be," Starr replied miserably, rolling out of bed and grabbing her backpack. She looked up and almost gave something close to a smile at the pure sympathy and concern in Langston's eyes; maybe she couldn't hold on to Schuyler, but at least she was lucky enough to still have the awesome best friend that she didn't deserve. "You know, some people would use this as an opportunity to point out they were right about why it was crazy for their friend to ever think she could date a teacher."

"Some people would be bitches, then," Langston replied simply, smiling slightly as she slung an arm around her friend's shoulders. Starr managed the most miniscule of smiles, and the two girls left, Langston practically having to drag Starr to get her out the door.

***~*~*~*~*~*~~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**

"Starr, you're gonna be okay, right?" Langston asked worriedly at the end of the day, watching Starr pace around near Schuyler's classroom, practically hyperventilating into her hands just at the prospect of having to talk to him. Yet again, Langston was amazed she'd ever thought this was a minor crush or passing phase on Starr's part.

"Yeah," Starr replied, though the answer was ruined by the fact that it came out squeaky and frantic. "Nobody ever dies from a broken heart, so physically, I'll be fine."

"Uh, good to know, but I didn't really mean physically."

"Well, we both already know I haven't been _okay_ emotionally for a while, that's not gonna change now," Starr muttered darkly.

Langston bit her lip hesitantly, debating with herself over whether or not she should try to convince Starr yet again that Schuyler really did love her; she personally wasn't falling for this act one bit, she still believed Schuyler was trying to be some dumbass martyr for Starr's sake, but after what she'd overheard at the hospital, after seeing him with Stacy, Starr refused to believe it.

"I can do this," Starr sighed, raking her fingers through her hair and rubbing her temple. "I told myself it would be okay for me to get involved with Schuyler as long as I didn't let it affect us at school, so I just won't let it. It's just another class, he's just another teacher," she muttered to herself.

It didn't do much to encourage her, but she decided to simply pretend it had, and steeled herself as she walked into the classroom, quickly taking her seat and keeping her head down as she did every day, not allowing herself so much as a glimpse at Schuyler. Every single time she looked at him, it felt like her heart was being torn into even smaller pieces and so she avoided it as much as possible.

The rest of the class filed in soon after, and Starr was vaguely aware of Schuyler announcing a pop quiz; somehow, Starr remained oblivious to how numb and cold Schuyler's voice was, or the fact that it had been that way ever since the break up. Even though everyone else had noticed it, he sounded just fine to Starr, her judgment of the situation was _that_ poor.

Schuyler grabbed the stack of tests and walked down the aisles, passing them out; Starr took a deep breath, preparing herself as he came closer to her; she didn't need to look up to know when he was approaching, she could just _feel_ it, in her spine, her gut, as always.

Starr's breath caught in her throat for a moment when he finally got to her, wordlessly placing the test on her desk without so much as a glance, and she nearly froze up, but quickly forced herself to hold up her paper.

"I, um, finally finished that assignment," she managed roughly, keeping her eyes downcast.

"Thank you," he replied simply. Starr screwed her eyes shut. "I'll grade this right now."

He took the paper from her hand, both taking great care to make sure their fingers did not touch in the process, and walked away without another word; Starr slowly exhaled, her shoulders shaking. That hadn't been so awful. Well, okay, yes it had, but it was manageable, survivable.

Without allowing herself another thought about it, Starr quickly began the test, focusing all of her attention on it; she'd been kind of out of it lately with all the drama in her life, and hadn't excelled on her most recent assignments, so she couldn't afford to screw this up.

When Starr had finished her test, before she moved on to double checking her work, her eyes automatically drifted up and over to Schuyler before she could stop herself, and Starr swallowed nervously when she saw that he was frowning, his brow furrowed, as he circled something on her paper with a red pen. Oh, crap. Well, couldn't focus on that now.

That sight of him with her paper had left her worried, so Starr proceeded to check her work not once, not twice, but three times before the bell rang, and she sighed in relief, positive she'd aced this; at least one thing was going right for her.

They all passed their papers up front, and Starr was about to bolt from the classroom as quickly as usually, when a voice suddenly stopped her in her tracks.

"Miss. Manning?"

Starr glanced up in shock; Schuyler usually avoided interaction with her just as much as she did him, though she didn't know what the hell _his_ problem was. _He'd_ been the one to dump her, abandon her, make a mockery of what they'd been, go running back to the girl he really loved and rub it in Starr's face that she'd only been a poor placeholder for Stacy. _He_ shouldn't have any problem facing her the way _she_ did _him_.

"Yes?" she asked roughly, struggling to breathe as she forced herself to look him in the eyes. Oh, God, there went that knife through her heart.

"I need you to stick around for a moment; we need to discuss your paper."

Starr felt a rush of dread; just saying six words to him in class hurt, how the hell was she going to manage to be _alone_ with him?

"Want me to fake sick?" Langston hissed from behind her; way she saw it, she could totally get Starr out of this if she pulled off a convincing fainting spell and distracted everyone.

"Okay, Mr. J," Starr choked out, effectively answering Langston's question. Langston and Markko exchanged an intensely concerned glanced behind their friend's back; Starr already looked like she was about to burst into tears.

"We'll wait for you right outside," Markko offered.

Starr took a deep breath, and flashed her friends a painfully fake looking smile, shaking her head. Was she seriously so pathetic that even Markko felt the need to babysit her now? No wonder Schuyler found her so needy, she obviously _was_ and had just never realized it.

"I'd rather you not," she admitted quietly, quickly whispering to them as the rest of the class left. "I think I'd prefer to be alone. You guys should just go do something, by yourselves, okay? You've been so busy Starr sitting that you haven't been able to actually act like a couple in days; I'm a big girl, it'll be fine."

"Well…if you're sure," Langston agreed reluctantly.

"Yes, go!" she encouraged. No seventeen year old should make her friends feel like they needed to hover like this- what was wrong with her?

The duo left, and Starr willed herself to be strong, squaring her shoulders as she turned and walked through the now empty classroom to Schuyler's desk, where he was waiting for her. Starr realized with a pang as she glanced around that this entire _room_ just made her sad; too many memories of baring her soul to Schuyler here, remembering all those talks that had meant everything to her, and apparently, nothing real to him.

"Was there a problem?" she asked him nervously.

Schuyler was silent for a moment, just gazing at Starr; she was keeping her focus on the desk and didn't notice the look of longing he fixed her with for a moment as his heart ached for her so fiercely that it caused him physical pain.

"You might say that," he finally answered, struggling to maintain his unfeeling demeanor.

Schuyler slid the paper across the desk to her, and Starr flinched at the 'C-' on the page. Yep, definitely not good.

"Not up to your usual standards."

"Nope," she agreed simply, tapping her fingers on the table in discomfort. "Not really."

There was a tense silence, as Starr offered nothing further, and finally, Schuyler sighed. He really, _really_ didn't want to go here, but he had promised himself when he'd given into his feelings for Starr that he would remain professional (as much as possible, considering what he was already doing), that his love for her would never be a factor in the classroom, and he had to remain true to that; he had to talk to her about this like he would any other student who was dealing with an obvious distraction, even if it killed him to do it.

"Starr, listen, I'm very sorry about what happened with us, I am, but you can't…you can't let me, us, interfere with your work. You have to get past that and move forward."

Starr's head instantly shot up, and she gazed at Schuyler in disbelief, her eyes slowly narrowing. _What_ had he just said to her? How _dare_ he?

Starr quickly felt her misery and heartbreak melting away, giving way to pure, hot, uncontrollable anger instead. He misinterpreted his feelings for her, used her for weeks on end while secretly wanting Stacy, tossed her out without a second thought, and now he was sitting here, giving some patronizing little speech about how her feelings for him shouldn't affect her grades? While he was off,happy as could be with Stacy, he thought about how she must be pining for him? When he was lying with Stacy at night (Starr's stomach twisted; the thought of Stacy in _her_ spot made her feel sick), he gave a thought to her crying herself to sleep over him or something, allowed himself a brief moment of pity for the girl he'd destroyed? In that one instant, everything changed; Starr was no longer crushed over Schuyler- she was absolutely _furious_ with him, for everything he had done to her, and this moment was the last straw.

"Don't flatter yourself!" she exploded, to her own surprise, jumping to her feet and towering over the desk as she fumed, all her emotional pain boiling over into rage. "The world does not revolve around you, _Mr. Joplin_, I'm over my little crush- _you_, _us_, are not interfering in my life in any way. My stepdad is on the run from the cops after being falsely accused of murder, my mom's a mess, we have no guarantee that the real killer won't go after her or someone else in the house again, and, oh yeah, I was held at gunpoint by a psycho not that long ago; I have a _lot_ of things on my mind that are interfering with my grades, I admit it, but you don't happen to be one of them," she hissed. Schuyler appeared stunned by her reaction, his face quickly falling.

"You haven't been on my mind at all, to be honest. I guess you haven't heard; you have no reason to be sorry about what you did, because you were doing me a _favor_- I'm back together with Cole now." Whoa, what? Some tiny part of her wondered what the hell she was doing, but the anger was too overwhelming to stop or give this any real thought. "And I am very happy with him, just like you are with Stacy, and I'm certainly not missing you, just like you're not missing me. You and everyone else were right, I just needed some distance to see that; you were a phase, you were someone I turned to and got in too deep with when I just needed someone- it could have been _anyone_." Starr missed the flicker of agonized pain in Schuyler's eyes, the moment of complete and utter heartbreak. "The only thing about _us_ that's bothering me anymore is the fact that I wasted my time with you when I could have been with Cole. You don't want me, and…" Starr gave only the briefest of hesitations before pressing on, and telling the biggest lie of her life. "And I don't want you. It's in the past as far as I'm concerned. Now, I'll try not to let those other factors bring the quality of my work down from now on, I'll do better- thanks for your concern," she spat darkly, spinning on her heel and stomping away. "Have a good night, Mr. Joplin."

Starr quickly stormed away, finding a deserted hallway, and just paced as she struggled to control her breathing, her body literally shaking from the anger still inside of her- the anger that was only temporarily covering the true pain. She'd said all of that because she wanted to hurt him, even a fraction as much as he'd hurt her, but really, who was she kidding? That wouldn't hurt him in the slightest- Schuyler didn't care, when would she get that through her head? Hell, he was probably thrilled to think she was back together with Cole since it'd get her off his back. Now he could just be happy with Stacy without any guilt over the girl he'd left behind. Oh, God, what Starr had said to Langston before the disaster at Schuyler's place was exactly right; many years from now, she was going to be the nameless girl, the unimportant little roadblock on Stacy and Schuyler's path to each other that got mentioned for two seconds when their kids asked how they'd fallen in love. She could just hear it now: _'And your father went so crazy from missing me that he transferred his feelings to some student in his class- what was her name, Schuy? Rain, Cloud, something like that- and actually convinced himself he was in love with her! It's okay, he came to his senses soon enough.'_

Starr kicked the nearest locker in frustration, then sank to the ground with a weary sigh, digging her nails into her palms as tears stung her eyes; was it possible to hate someone so much that you never wanted to see them again and love them so much that there was literally nothing you wouldn't do to be with them, all at once? Because that was how she felt right now. Starr desperately fought the tears, allowing them to blur her vision, but finally had to blink and they went spilling over; Starr quickly brushed them away, fighting to compose herself. What if Schuyler saw her like this, and instantly realized she'd lied? He was going to think she was even more pathetic than he already did.

Starr continued to sit on the ground in silence, her energy completely and utterly drained. Something about this moment felt oddly familiar to her, and she struggled to figure out why, until it finally hit her minutes later; this was too similar to the night of that stupid spring dance, when she'd been out in the hall and Schuyler had left his chaperoning position to make sure she was okay, talk to her, stay with her, and for the first time, Starr had allowed herself to hope that he might see her as more than a student.

That memory was too much; Starr jumped to her feet with a strangled noise of pain and quickly walked away, desperately wishing she hadn't sent Markko and Langston away; she could really use her friends now, she needed them- she just needed someone, period.

Starr reflexively grabbed her locket, taking a shuddering breath, and it suddenly hit her- Cole. Cole was someone who understood the situation, that she could be honest with; Cole would be there for her, she knew that much. Hopefully, she could still catch him after his last class.

Thankful she still had his schedule memorized, Starr quickly ran to the right classroom, breathing a sigh of relief when she saw him milling around in the hall, talking to a couple of guys she didn't know.

"Cole," she called out, flinching when her voice trembled.

He turned, and instantly, his face fell in concern. He immediately said goodbye to the guys he was with and quickly came to her, furrowing his brow.

"Starr? Hey, what's up, what's wrong?"

"I just…I don't know, I just needed to see someone," she said weakly, rubbing her eyes. Cole quickly steered her around the corner so they were alone, his hands warm and gentle on her shoulders.

"You wanna talk about it?"

Starr simply shook her head, biting her lip. Cole was hesitant for a moment, not sure what she wanted or needed, and then finally, just wordlessly opened his arms. Starr gratefully sank into his embrace, and Cole just hugged her tight, rubbing soothing circles on her back.

Starr sighed against his shoulder; here Cole was, being great to her, even after she had chosen Schuyler, and what had she just done? Lied about their relationship for Schuyler's sake; she still couldn't believe she'd said she was with Cole.

As Cole continued to hold her, Starr felt an idea slowly brewing in the back of her mind. Really, though…would it be the worst thing if she were to make that the truth? Maybe everything that had happened recently- finding out Hope was alive, the prom, Cole being the one to return her locker, the mess with Schuyler- were signs. Maybe Langston had been right all along- maybe she and Cole were just meant for each other and she should stop fighting it.

Would it be so bad if that were the case? Cole made his mistakes, sure, but for better or worse, she always seemed to be the first thing on his mind. Cole always _wanted_ her, she was secure in that, and with the exception of her time spent with Schuyler ( "_You make me sick"_ rang in her head, causing to Starr to flinch for a moment), he thought the world of her, much more than she deserved. She never had to worry about him not wanting her anymore.

"Better?" Cole asked, having noticed that her shaking stopped and her breathing calmed.

Cole pulled back, and smiled at her reassuringly. Starr gazed at him contemplatively for a moment, and then suddenly moved forward and kissed him.

However, much to Starr's surprise, her lips had only been on his for a moment, when Cole roughly grabbed her shoulders and firmly pushed her away, his eyes hard.

"No, Starr, we're not doing this, hell no," he abruptly snapped, looking, once again to her surprise, more than just a little angry with her.

"Cole," she began slowly, in true confusion. She would have thought he'd be _happy_ about this. "I don't understand, what-"

"Starr, I didn't give up on the idea of us and walk away despite the fact that it was _killing_ me, decide with myself I was gonna let you go so you could be happy with the guy _you chose_, just so you could come running back and _use me_ when the guy acted like a dick. I'm not interested in that, sorry to disappoint you," he snapped, averting his gaze, as if he couldn't stand to look at her after what she'd just tried.

Starr stared at him in a stunned silence for a moment, and then slowly crumpled, her eyes darkening with embarrassment and shame as she realized he was exactly right- she had just attempted to use her friend, and for what? Revenge? Schuyler couldn't care less what she was up to or who she was kissing, she had literally _just_ admitted that to herself. To make herself feel better, less lonely, wanted? Well, God, no wonder Schuyler didn't want her if that was the kind of person she was. She had treated _Cole_, after all he'd done for her, as something to be used for her own gain, with no thought to him. Could she be more of a bitch? Could she be more of a _mess?_

"Oh, God, I'm sorry, Cole," Starr said weakly, knowing that wasn't enough. "I didn't-"

"Whatever, Starr, it's fine."

"No, it's not! I'm so-"

"Starr, seriously, chill. For what it's worth, I blame him, not you," Cole attempted to joke. Starr winced, and Cole sighed. "Sorry. Starr, I'm…look, I'm sorry, I want to help, but I think I should go," he muttered. "It's selfish, but I don't think I can be the person you go crying to over _him_, that's a little more than I can handle. You should call Langston, though, okay?" he said softly, his voice still concerned.

Starr just nodded half-heartedly, silenced by her guilt. Cole cautiously cupped her cheek, gently brushing at the pooled up tears under her eye with his thumb, then let go and turned to leave after one more smile, leaving Starr alone- the last thing she wanted right now.

***~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Many hours afterwards, late that night, Starr pulled up to Rodi's and hopped out of her car, hoping she might find Jessica here; she knew she liked to visit Brody during his shifts here sometime. She hadn't been able to take just sitting in silence in her room, relieving the awful moments of this day over and over again, but her mom was so worried about the mess with John and Marty that she didn't want to bother her, and Langston was spending the night with Lola until Markko got off work, so she'd decided Jessica was the next best person to turn to. Jessica understood matters of the heart, and she never judged.

Starr walked inside and immediately scanned the room for either Jessica or Brody, but saw neither of them anywhere, much to her frustration. However, she did spot Gigi; Gigi had been the one to tell Schuyler about the plot Stacy had tried to pull off with Shane, and he'd become friends with her and Rex afterwards; Starr now knew the two of them fairly well thanks to a few close calls, running into each other at the ASM.

"Hi, Gigi," she greeted her with a small smile; Gigi, who had been gazing off at something with a furrowed brow, startled, then quickly flashed a smile of her own. "How's Shane?"

"Hey, Starr! Shane's great, thanks for asking. What are you doing here?" she asked, her motherly instincts creeping up and creating a note of concern in her voice. "Do you need something?"

"I was just wondering if you've by any chance seen Jessica?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, Starr, she left about half an hour ago with Brody when he got off," Gigi answered, her eyes flickering to the side, where she'd been gazing before. Starr frowned curiously. "Anything I can help with?"

"I just needed to talk to Jessica about something, but, it's not important," she sighed. "I should probably just go. Thanks, though."

"Of course. I hope everything's alright, Starr."

Starr just nodded and turned to leave, but Gigi suddenly took a step towards her, nervously calling her name to stop her.

"Yeah?"

"You, um…you're pretty close to your teacher, Schuyler Joplin, right? You two seem like…friends." Starr's lips twitched for a second, and she smiled sadly, just shrugging.

"Sure," she replied lifelessly. "We're friends."

"Okay, uh, oh boy…I probably shouldn't be involving his student in this, but, too late," she muttered before continuing. "Schuyler is a recovering addict, right? I think he mentioned that to Rex when he offered him a drink once." Starr frowned deeper and nodded. "I thought so; oh, damn it, that's why he should not be here, I should have told them not to serve him," Gigi groaned, shaking her head. Starr's heart froze as it dropped to her feet.

"Wait, _what_? Schuyler's _here_?" she gasped, realizing that must have been what Gigi was staring at.

"Uh, yeah, and…he looks pretty bad, Starr," she admittedly worriedly. "He seriously should not be here, but I don't know what to do, and I just thought-"

"Where is he?" Starr asked hotly. Gigi looked startled, but simply pointed him out. Starr turned, and shook her head in disbelief when she saw Schuyler slumped over the bar, nursing a glass of some brown liquid, a couple of shots of something clear next to it. "Thanks for telling me, Gigi, I'll handle it," she immediately replied without thinking, storming away. Gigi watched her hesitantly for a moment, and decided she should just let it go- this was none of her business.

"Schuyler," Starr snapped as she reached his side, wrinkling her nose; oh, gross, he reeked of alcohol.

Schuyler glanced up at the sound of her voice, his eyes glassy and bleary, and slowly broke into a smile; it wasn't the warm smile of his she usually got in greeting, but something different, one she'd never seen before. She shifted in sudden discomfort.

"_Starr_," he greeted her happily, sounding way too giddy, before his shoulders suddenly sank. "No, you shouldn't be here, you shouldn't be _here_; what are you doing here?"

"What are _you_ doing here, Schuyler?!" Starr demanded, regaining her senses and anger. "_You_ shouldn't be here. What, did you just _forget_ that you're a recovering addict? Granted, for drugs, and I'm not an expert, but I'm _pretty_ sure this is considered a big no-no too. What the _hell_ is wrong with you?" she thundered, beyond furious with him.

Why would Schuyler do this? She was _so_ proud of his strength, how far he'd come; why was he all of the sudden backtracking like this? She gazed at him expectantly, her eyes burning, and even under the grip of inebriation, Schuyler at least had the decency to look shamed. The look faded a second later, though, and he just casually smirked and shrugged.

"Who cares, right?"

"Excuse me?" she asked tightly, sliding onto the stool next to him; she didn't care how much he didn't want her around, she wasn't going to run off and let him ruin everything he'd worked for like this.

"No, I mean, seriously, Starr…" his voice was high and strained, and he went quiet for a moment, looking confused, like he temporarily forgot where he was and what he was talking about, before continuing. "Like, think about it. I did this…" he meant to gesture towards himself, but ended up just wildly gesturing around the room. "This whole, all well adjusted and put together Mr. Joplin thing was because of my mom, and what did she do in return? She went and offed herself before I could even apologize for all the shit I did," Schuyler spat, his voice angrier than she'd ever heard it, as he clutched the edge of the bar until his fingers were white. "I mean, sure, I didn't exactly give her much to live for, but I didn't think she had _nothing_. She didn't even _try_. That's what she would constantly beg me to do- 'You can do it, Schuyler, you're strong enough to beat this, just _try_'-" he imitated her voice, sneering. "But _she_ didn't, so screw it, why should I?"

Starr inhaled sharply; Leah had only done that because of what Starr and her insanely screwed up family had done to her, so why couldn't Schuyler see that all of this anger belonged directed at _her_? Starr desperately wished he would instead of blaming Leah for what Todd had pushed her to, and himself for not being a better son.

"Schuyler, that's not true, she didn't feel that way, like you didn't give her enough to live for," Starr said softly, her voice intense with sympathy. She reflexively reached out to touch him before quickly yanking her arm back. "She loved you more than anything."

"Oh, I'm sorry, were you there? Did she tell you how she felt?" he asked petulantly, absent mindedly tearing up a napkin. Starr sighed.

"No, but Schuy, I just know that she-"

"So, what'msayin'," he ignored her, words starting to slur slightly. "Is that she's not here, the only person who really cared is long gone, so why the hell shouldn't I be here? I _like_ it here, I belong here."

"No you don't, Schuyler!" she replied heatedly, gripping his arm tightly before she could stop herself. "Oh my God, what's _wrong_ with you, why would you even say that? You shouldn't be here because _you_ care, Schuyler, whether you can admit it right now or not. You didn't get clean and stay that way for your mom; I'm not saying she wasn't part of it, but you're not giving yourself anywhere near enough credit when you say that. You got clean for _yourself_, and some part of you knows that; I know you do, or you wouldn't have said everything you did about Cole needing to get clean for himself and nobody else. You got clean because you were tired of being a drugged up loser and knew you could do more, and because you are _better than this_," she hissed passionately. "And tomorrow, you're going to be ashamed you did this, that you took the easy way out of whatever the hell it is bothering you right now, like a _coward_, just like I am."

"You're ashamed of me?" Schuyler repeated, his voice rough and disbelieving; it sounded like he was just thinking out loud, but Starr felt compelled to answer.

"Yes. Know why? Because just like _you_ really do care, so do I. I care," she muttered uncomfortably, averting her eyes. Schuyler gazed at her emotionally for a moment as Starr pressed on. "And that's why you shouldn't be here."

Starr looked back up, and felt a rush of surprise when she saw that Schuyler was just staring at her, his expression dark and unreadable. Starr cautiously reached out to touch his shoulder, and Schuyler instantly shrugged her hand off like he'd been burned; Starr bit her lip, that tiny little gesture nearly bringing tears to her eyes.

"Shouldn't you be with _Cole_?" he asked pointedly, roughly turning away from her.

Starr sighed; well, good to know that little lie about Cole _had_ been as dumb as she thought- she had just given him yet another way to try to get rid of her. Starr, of course, was being oblivious as she always was since the break-up when it came to Schuyler's feelings for her, and _completely_ missed that Schuyler was flat out jealous, assuming this was only about Schuyler wanting her as far away from him as possible.

"Cole understands," she replied shortly and vaguely, determined not to be pushed away when he was in this state.

"Of course he does," Schuyler muttered, rolling his eyes. Starr blinked slowly, furrowing her brow; what was that supposed to mean?

"Schuy…" Starr began slowly, nervously combing her fingers through her hair. "Just tell me, what are you doing here? What could possibly have upset you enough that you'd break and come here? Did you have a fight with Stacy or something?" Starr asked reluctantly, hating herself for it. This could only bring her pain, why the hell would she ask?

The truth was, Star knew it was because she loved Schuyler enough to want him to be happy even if it meant her own misery, and she would do anything in her power to _help_ him be happy, which he obviously wasn't right now.

"Who?" he asked blankly.

"What do you- Stacy!" Starr spluttered as she repeated it, staring at him with wide eyes. "Your girlfriend, hello? Are you seriously _that_ drunk?"

"Ohhhhh, _right_, Stacy. Stacy," he repeated with a slight chuckle, tilting his head as he repeated her name a few more times. Starr gave an exasperated sigh, waiting for him to find a point. "You think…you think I'm here because I had a fight with _Stacy_?"

"That's what I'm asking you, yes," she snapped, hating him for forcing her to dwell on thoughts of him and Stacy together.

Schuyler just stared at her for a second, grinning strangely, and then suddenly burst out laughing, doubling over as his shoulders shook from the force of his laughter; apparently, he found the idea hysterical.

"I'm guessing that's a no," she muttered.

"Starr," he chuckled her name, shaking his head. "You actually think that? When I really…"

"When you what?" she prompted, thinking he had just lost track of himself again.

"Nevermind."

Starr pinched the bridge of her nose, slowly exhaling in frustration; he was killing her.

"Fine, Schuyler; if it's not because of Stacy, then what exactly drove you here?" Starr asked in exasperation.

Schuyler pressed his fist to his mouth, watching her contemplatively for a moment, then reluctantly tore his eyes away.

"I don't know," he mumbled, grabbing one of the shot glasses. He had just pressed it to his lips when Starr yanked it away from him, glaring, and slammed it back on the bar with a loud clang, causing the liquid to splash over the rim.

"You don't know," she repeated tightly, slowly giving a dark laugh. "Uh, wow. You ruin all your time sober with this stupid drunken night, and you don't even know why you did it? You cannot even _begin_ to comprehend how_ pissed_ I am at you right now, Schuyler, you really can't," Starr sighed, massaging her temples. "Not that you care, I'm sure."

"I care," Schuyler suddenly snapped intensely, gripping her wrist and pulling it from her face. Starr looked at him in wide eyed surprise, and his face softened as he loosened his grip on her wrist, his thumb lightly caressing her skin. Starr shut her eyes, taking a shaky breath. "I care," he repeated quieter.

"We should go, Schuy," she said softly, before he could go any further with this. The last thing she needed was false hope. "Come on, I'll just-"

"I'm not going anywhere with you," he suddenly snapped, abruptly releasing her arm. Starr reeled back, hurt, and Schuyler instantly softened, groaning. "No, Starr, you don't get it," he moaned pitifully, suddenly slumping over and practically collapsing in her lap. Starr froze, biting her lip nervously, and awkwardly patted his back. "I didn't mean it like that, you just don't _understand_."

"Any chance you might actually help me with that, or would you rather just keep being cryptic and confusing?"

"…Huh?" he asked wearily as he turned his head to peer up at her in confusion, that being way too much for his mind to handle in it's current drunken state.

"Nothing. Schuyler, I just want to take you home, and then I'll leave right away," she muttered darkly, unable to believe she had to promise something like that only a week after she'd practically been living with him and thought things had been perfect. "_Please_."

Schuyler was silent for a long time, and then finally gave her a small nod as he heaved a great sigh. Starr again fought tears; was spending time with her seriously that painful for him?

Starr managed to get Schuyler's keys from him- he was now limp and seemed to be on the verge of passing out, so he wasn't much help- and handed them over to Gigi, asking that she keep them until Langston could get there. Then, she actually grabbed her phone to quickly call Langston.

"Hey, Lang," she began as soon as she heard the answer. "I-"

"You are not going to _believe_ this, Starr!" Langston shrieked in greeting, in the completely infuriated tone that meant _someone_ was going to be suffering her wrath soon. Any other night, Starr would have been _dying_ to know what was up, but Schuyler had clouded her mind so much that she wasn't even curious.

"You'll have to tell me later, Langston, I need a favor," Starr interrupted quickly.

"What?" Langston asked; she was still huffing with anger, but could tell her friend needed help, not to listen to her rant and tell her about how she was going to murder her bitch cousin over what she'd discovered tonight.

"I, um, need you to ask Markko to take you by Rodi's, and for you to ask Gigi for Schuyler's keys and thendrive his car back to the ASM, and get a ride home from Markko afterwards. Just leave Schuyler's keys in the glove compartment or something, and leave him a note saying where they are, please. I'm really sorry I have-"

"_Schuyler_?" Langston interrupted, her anger evaporating for a moment in the face of this news. "Why do you need me to- oh my God, are you with him right now?! Starr, what's going on, are you two-"

"Can't talk," Starr said in a rush, flinching as she hung up on her friend. Not the nicest move, but she really _couldn't_ get into a big discussion about that right now. "Okay, Schuyler, let's go," she sighed, helping him off the barstool and putting her arm around his waist supportively.

Now, instead of pulling away from her touch, Schuyler did the opposite, clinging to Starr and pulling her tightly against his side. She was pretty sure he actually nuzzled her hair for a split second, and it made her stop dead in her tracks; uh, okay, apparently they had gotten to the 'affectionate' stage of drunkness.

"You shouldn't haftalie to Lang…ston," he mumbled in a slight slur against her hair.

"I didn't lie," she told him tightly, pushing the door open and dragging him out into the parking lot. "I just avoided it all together."

"Shouldn't have to avoid," he muttered.

"Well, too late!" she snapped, not sure of how to handle this; despite dumping her and kicking her out of his life, he still had that stupid guilt complex when it came to her? That made no sense.

Starr managed to get Schuyler in the passenger seat and she drove him back to his place in an unnerving silence; he just stared at her, way too intently, the entire time, and Starr desperately forced herself to look straight ahead as if she hadn't noticed.

"Stacy?" she called now that they were right outside the door; she wasn't sure if she wanted the other girl there or gone more, it was close. "Stacy, are you there?" she tried again, waiting in the following silence far longer than necessary.

"I don't think she's here," Schuyler said in a dramatic stage whisper beside her.

"Guess not," Starr muttered grimly; she'd really wanted to avoid going inside, where she knew the memories would be a thousand times more painful than at school- and things were barely manageable _there_.

Starr reluctantly got the door open and helped Schuyler inside, breathing sharply when one of the first things she saw was her own shirt in a corner of the floor; _instantly_, flashes of the day she'd left it there raced through her mind, ending on Schuyler's cold eyes as he told her he didn't want her and shattered her heart to pieces, and Starr struggled to breathe as she fought for control.

"Starr?"

If Starr didn't know better, the note of something that sound an awful lot like concern, in Schuyler's voice, might have made Starr think he was worried, that he cared- good thing she _did_ know better.

Starr didn't say anything as she guided him to bed- she _couldn't_, the effort it took to keep from crumbling to pieces as every step they took reminded her of some kiss or laugh they'd shared in that spot, overwhelming her ability to do anything but walk and stare dead ahead. Schuyler quickly collapsed on the bed when they reached it, groaning and clutching his head.

"I'll be right back," she muttered.

Starr quickly grabbed a bottle of water from the kitchen, then wandered into the bathroom; all she had wanted to do was grab the trash bin, but once she was inside, memories of that day Cole had come storming in and she'd had to hide flooded her mind. She recalled every harsh word Schuyler said, how he'd tried to reassure her at the time that he loved her and it was all an act for Cole. Even when she'd believed that, it had still hurt like hell, and now that she knew Schuyler didn't love her at all, that he'd subconsciously meant every word he'd said to Cole, it was _agonizing_. She doubled over for a moment, tightly pressing her fist to her mouth to muffle the sound of her crying, mentally _begging_ herself to just wait until she was out of his apartment to do this.

Finally, Starr managed to swallow her sobs and put her brave face back on, even though she knew it was obvious what she'd been doing by her red, blotchy eyes, and quickly grabbed the trash can; she considered getting Advil too, but honestly, screw that. If he wanted to act like a dumb asshole and get drunk (Starr was surprised by _just_ how angry she was with him for this), the least he could do was deal with the headache.

"Here's everything you need, feel better, see you in class," she said in one short breath, speaking so quickly that the words blended together as she kept her eyes on her shoes.

Starr quickly spun on her heel so she could get the hell out of there, but to her surprise, Schuyler, who seemed just barely awake, caught her wrist and turned her back to face him. Starr uncomfortably kept looking everywhere but at him, until finally, the weight of his gaze was just too much to take and she finally met his eyes. Schuyler studied her for a moment, then smiled grimly, tugging her down closer to him so he could cup her cheek, his fingers lightly tracing the remaining wetness under her eyes. Starr shut her eyes as shivered, unconsciously leaning into his touch, feeling almost desperate for it.

"All I ever do is make you cry," he noted, his voice so thick with sadness that it hurt her too.

He removed his hand, and Starr slowly let her eyes flutter open, hating that the moment she'd been pathetically wishing could go on forever had ended in five seconds. She, for some reason, opened her mouth to assure Schuyler that wasn't true, hating to see him feeling so guilty for her pain even though the fact was, he _was_ the cause of it, but Schuyler's eyes were shut and his breathing had already evened out. Starr sighed; that was for the best, it would make her escape so much easier.

Forcing herself not to touch him, not to let her gaze linger, she turned and quickly left the sleeping area and walked into the living room, seeing that stupid shirt again. She hesitantly swooped down and grabbed it, holding it carefully between two fingers, as if it disgusted her. She was _so_ burning the stupid thing when she got home; she was definitely never going to wear it again anyway.

Starr grabbed her purse where she'd dropped it near the door, fishing her car keys back out, and froze suddenly as her fingers brushed the paper stuffed inside- that dumb letter of hers. She'd brought it to show Jessica, because she knew trying to verbally articulate how she felt was just going to make her cry again.

Starr nervously bit her lip as she felt a surprising urge, and finally, she decided to give in, grasping her letter and placing it on the table for him to find before practically running out of the apartment, knowing she would chicken out if she stayed there for one more second. If Schuyler was going to feel guilty about hurting the poor little girl he'd led on or whatever, she might as well make sure he knew the full extent of what he'd done. It's not like it would truly bother him in the long run anyway; Starr thought with a surge of bitterness about how she was sure Stacy would comfort him and make it all better.

Starr had no idea that only feet away from her in his room, it was _her_ name that Schuyler was muttering in his sleep, as he clutched the pillow she'd always used when she was there to his chest like drowning man held a lifeline.


	18. Chapter 18

"Wakey-wakey, Starr!"

"It is six in the morning, psycho!" Starr hissed from under the covers as Langston came skipping into her room the next morning.

"And I have been up waiting to talk to you since five, I have been very patient, but it's time for you to get up now so we can talk properly before school! Can you start by telling me why you were lame and left a note explaining everything that happened last night on my computer instead of just waiting up to tell me?"

"Uh, maybe because I don't want to talk about it and thought you might get the hint that way," Starr grumbled, tossing the covers down but throwing her arm across her eyes, squinting pain fully as Langston flipped the lightswitch.

"What? No, Starr, come on, this is huge! We _have_ to talk about it! You have to tell me every detail; how did he look at you, did he touch you at all, how did he say-"

"Langston, _no_," Starr hissed fiercely, abruptly moving her arm and rolling over to look her friend directly in the eyes. "This is why I didn't want to talk about it! You're going to overanalyze everything and drag it out, and I don't want to do that, I just want to forget it and move on."

"What?" Langston spluttered, shaking her head. "Starr, are you kidding? Your ex-boyfriend, mr. sober living, works part time as a drug counselor, relapsed last night, had some very weird, suspicious behavior towards you, and you don't even want to-"

"It wasn't suspicious, he was drunk! He would have been like that with anyone!"

"I highly doubt Schuyler would have been nuzzling my hair or making comments about always making me cry if I had been the one to find him. And you never even found out why he got drunk in the first place! We really should-"

"Look, Langston, if you're going to be evil and wake me up at six in the morning, what_ I_ want to talk about is whatever had you so angry last night," Starr began innocently, totally baiting Langston to distract her. "Did that resolve itself, or-"

"Uh, no, it certainly did not!" Langston suddenly snapped, her face hard and angry as she instantly forgot the Schuyler drama, plopping down onto the bed beside her friend as she dramatically eyed her. "Starr, we need to quickly get together an alibi and bail money, because I'm murdering Lola today."

"Uh-oh, what happened?" she laughed easily, assuming her friend was being melodramatic as she often was.

"Turns out, that while I've been taking her in, making her feel like family, making her feel welcome, that little _slut_ has been trying to steal Markko from me!"

"What?" Starr gasped in shock, bolting upright in the bed; she seriously had not been expecting _that_. "Oh, ugh, I _knew_ something was up, I always had a bad feeling about her!"

"I should have trusted your instincts, but stupid me, I was just too happy to have a cousin," Langston muttered darkly, shaking her head. Starr sympathetically squeezed her shoulder. "That's why Markko didn't tell me anything about what she was doing, actually," she sighed sadly, though she smiled slightly thinking of her boyfriend. "He didn't want to tell me because he knew how happy I was to have blood family- he didn't want to ruin it. But, I found out everything last night when I walked in on the _tramp_ cornering my poor, defenseless boyfriend, jamming her tongue down his throat! She tried to make it sound like he was coming on to her, which- uh, yeah right bitch," Langston scoffed. Starr sighed sadly, recalling when she'd seen Stacy kiss Schuyler all those weeks ago and had had similar faith in her boyfriend, had been so convinced Stacy wasn't a threat and that she didn't need to worry. "Apparently, she's been hitting on him practically since the moment they met, and that's like, the third time she's kissed him."

"What a whore!" Starr scoffed, feeling her anger towards Stacy spreading to Lola. Langston looked at her knowingly, understanding where much of the anger behind that remark was coming from.

"I know, right?! We are, like, surrounded by sluts, Starr, and I personally am getting tired of it. So, Lola spent the night at a friend's house last night, like a huge coward, but it's okay, because she'll have to show her face at school at some point, and when she does, she will die," Langston told her calmly. Starr looked at her hesitantly.

"I'm sure you are, but just to be safe, I have to ask…you're just ranting, right? You're not going to really start something with Lola at school, _right_?" Langston just gave her a _look_, and Starr groaned. "Lang, come on! Why? Markko has been perfectly faithful to you, nothing's happened, and you know the truth now, so just let it go!"

"Nope, not an option," she told her in a clipped tone. "If I let her just get away with this, she'll keep trying, and when Markko still doesn't want her skanky ass, she's going to get more and more upset, and when she finally realizes that she's never going to have my boyfriend, she's going to try to ruin my life instead; since a certain someone wasn't awake to talk to me and distract me, I had a lot of time to think this over last night!"

"Langston, you could get hurt, you could get in serious trouble, and for what? Violence doesn't solve anything!"

"Uh, I'm so not going to get hurt, I can take her, and I'm willing to accept the trouble so I can teach Lola a lesson and put her in place; you just have to do it once and then they learn, Starr, violence totally solves things- trust me."

"You're not going to get trust from me while you're contemplating murder, sorry," Starr giggled, though she eyed Langston with a look that let her know she was serious.

"Look, it's not like I'm asking you to watch or something, just don't try to stop me."

"I think we both know I'm going to, no matter what you say."

"Well, have fun trying," Langston said simply with a laugh, her tone not unkind, just honest. "We're obviously not going to reach an agreement here, so come on, let's go get breakfast."

Starr glanced at her alarm clock and groaned, swatting Langston with her pillow.

"Breakfast at six in the morning," she groused playfully. "I shouldn't even be _up_ yet. You are so lucky that I love you."

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

"Are you coming to, finally? Schuy, let me tell you, you are _so_ lucky that I love you, because you just looked…_ew_ last night; that's why I slept on the couch, in case you were wondering- wasn't sure what was wrong with you, didn't want to catch it."

"I wasn't wondering," he snapped shortly from the floor of the bathroom where he was currently slumped over, as Stacy wandered over.

"Dude, what the hell is your problem? Why have you been acting like such a bitch all morning?" Stacy complained, crossing her arms defensively as she eyed him from the doorway.

Schuyler averted his eyes; he was surprised she hadn't realized what was up, she'd seen him this way often enough.

"Stacy…I got _drunk_ last night," Schuyler spat out darkly, clenching his fists tightly; just saying those words made him feel more nauseous than the hangover itself. He recalled all the excuses and self-pity he'd had and could only shake his head. He knew so much better than that.

Starr, unsurprisingly, had nailed it; the shame he was currently experiencing was so great that it felt like it was choking him, and it only got worse at the thought of her; he was disgusted with himself for letting Starr see him like that. He recalled what he'd said to her the night they had gotten together- "_I don't ever want you to see me the way I was then_"- and scoffed at himself; well, great fucking job there.

What the hell was _wrong_ with him? He did the worst thing he could imagine to push Starr away in order to protect her from him, and right as it seemed to be working, he went and _relapsed_, and left Starr to deal with the fallout; he must have seriously screwed with her head after everything he did last night. He could only hope Starr was so deeply ashamed of him that she tried to forget it altogether.

"Okay, so?" Stacy asked carelessly, shrugging. Schuyler glared at her, looking disgusted, and Stacy furrowed her brow in confusion. "_What_? You got drunk once, no big deal."

"No big deal?" Schuyler repeated slowly in disbelief, longing for Starr's fury with him right now. "It's a huge fucking deal, Stacy! Are you forgetting that I'm an addict?"

"You _were_ an addict, one night does not make you again."

"No, Stacy, _am_; it doesn't stop, it doesn't go away, you just control it, and last night, I _didn't_," he spat, self loathing thick in his tone. Stacy just rolled her eyes.

"You can be such a drama queen, Schuy. If you want to beat yourself up, fine, whatever, I forgot that you're all noble now."

"…why I am even talking to you about this?" he muttered darkly. Stacy huffed angrily.

"Because I'm your girlfriend?"

Schuyler said nothing, biting back the urge to inform her that was only for Starr's sake; he was still aware that fact made him an asshole, and he'd been the one to go after Stacy, not the other way around- he'd brought this on himself. Besides, it wasn't Stacy's fault that she just didn't understand him, no more than it was his fault he didn't understand her.

"So, I shouldn't even be offering if you're going to be a jerk like this, but do you need me to call the school and tell them you're sick?"

Schuyler nearly said yes, but hesitated, taking a shaky breath as he recalled Starr's hurt, confused expression, her teary eyes. He didn't get to hide here like a coward after that, not when he owed her a hell of an apology and a promise to stay out of her life and never put her in a situation like that again. After his weakness and failure last night, it was time to man up and get back on track.

"No," he decided with a sigh. "I'm just going to wait as long as possible to go in."

"Okay, well, feel better. I'm heading out; I'd kiss you goodbye, but, uh, gross," she scoffed, wrinkling her nose. Schuyler felt relieved; faking his way through the physical acts with Stacy made him feel sick.

Stacy walked to the living room, gathering her jacket and keys, then grabbed her purse from the table, glancing curiously at the wrinkled papers lying there. Never one to care much about privacy, Stacy grabbed them, her eyebrows shooting up when she read the words 'Dear Schuyler'. Who the hell was writing letters she didn't know about to _her_ boyfriend?

Stacy read on with sudden urgency, her eyes hard and angry, but she instantly relaxed, snickering when she realized it was from Starr Manning. Ah, so it was just Schuyler's little high school stalker, nothing to worry about. Stacy continued to read the letter, but now for simple amusement instead of out of possessiveness, and it was all she could do to contain her laughter; god, was this girl kidding her? She was setting some kind of world record for lack of self-awareness if she didn't comprehend was insanely creepy and pathetic this letter was. Could she possibly _whine_ more? 'Schuyler, you broke my heart, I'm saaaad. Why don't you love meeee, wah wah. I miss you, I'm going crazy, boo hoo.' How had Schuy tolerated this shit?

With a wide grin, Stacy came up with a quick idea to start her day off with a little fun, stuffing the letter in her purse and quickly walking to the door; it seemed it was time that she met little Starr Manning face to face and made sure she understood who Schuyler belonged to.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~***

"No, you know when I really should have known? When I invited her to join us on our 'Grease' night, and she said she hated that movie!"

"Langston," Starr replied listlessly from her spot on the couch, having been listening to her friend list the many various moments she should have figured out something was up with Lola for thirty minutes. "I don't think you can blame yourself for not realizing Lola is a psychotic tramp because she doesn't like musicals or something, that's not really a give away."

"It's just all of the things _combined_, y'know? I needed to take a step back and see the big picture, and I didn't!"

"But you have now," Starr pointed out. "That's what I keep trying to tell you, about why you should just let it go. You know everything you need to, and I mean, now that you do, the worst is over, she can't do any more damage."

"Well…okay, that might be true," Langston mused.

Starr breathed a sigh of relief, hopeful that Langston might calm down and choose to just avoid Lola.

However, it was as if Dorian somehow overheard her thoughts and decided to do the exact thing that would crush that hope, as the doors to the living room were suddenly swung open, and she came storming in, phone pressed tightly to her ear.

"Langston!" she shrieked, steam practically shooting from her ears. Starr and Langston both jumped, staring at her in shock.

"What's going o-"

"Operation Deflower?!" she cried.

The room fell deathly still as Langston slowly breathed in, her eyes growing wide and horrified.

"Oh my God," she whimpered.

"Yes, yes, thank you, Lola. I have to go now, dear," Dorian said calmly into the phone, hanging up as she gazed at Langston coldly. "My room, now," she hissed, spinning on her heel and storming out of the living room. Starr just looked to her friend in confusion.

"Langston, I don't get it, what's-"

"_That bitch_!" Langston screamed, clenching her fists as she jumped to her feet. "She knows she's going to die, that's the only explanation! She knows I'm going to rip her friggin head off today so she's going for broke."

"What did she do?! I'm still not following!"

Langston took a breath, her shoulders trembling, and she sat next to Starr, quickly beginning to explain, knowing she had to hurry before Dorian exploded.

"Okay, so, um, Markko and I decided that we've been together for so long, and we love each other so much, that we've really waited long enough and that it's time we finally, um, made love," Langston squeaked nervously, quickly pushing on as Starr's jaw dropped. "So we've been making the plans, getting prepared and everything, and as a stupid joke, we've been referring to the whole thing as 'Operation Deflower' and I guess Lola heard us."

"You and Markko have been…and you didn't…how could you not tell me?!" Starr spluttered in disbelief. "That's such a huge deal! You're the one who said girls have to tell each other these things!"

"I don't know!" Langston cried. "You've been so heartbroken, I just didn't want to make it worse by rubbing it in that I'm so happy. And besides," she rushed to add defensively. "You never told me about your last boyfriend at all, I had to find out by accident, so you're not exactly in a place to judge!"

"Okay, fair enough," Starr muttered. "But the first point is just dumb. Langston, you and Markko are my best friends, I love you both- you being happy makes me happy too. I don't ever want you to think I'm so selfish that you can only be happy and in love when I am, okay?"

"Okay," Langston said softly, smiling.

"_Langston_!" Dorian screeched from upstairs. Langston flinched, her smile instantly fading.

"Okay, I think you need to go off to your doom now, but I want details later!" Starr ordered. "Every little thing, I wanna know it all; this is _big_, we have to talk about it."

"Oh, thank God!" Langston sighed, grinning. "I have been _dying_ to tell you everything, I'm ready to talk your ear off. If I make it out of this day alive and without being thrown in prison."

Starr held her hands up, showing her crossed fingers, and Langston laughed nervously, swallowing hard as she reluctantly left the room to go talk with Dorian.

Once her friend was gone, Starr leaned against the couch with a tired sigh, her face falling as her heart felt heavy; she was genuinely happy for her friends that everything was going so great for them, but it did hurt to remember that not so long ago, she'd been making plans like that, gushing over Schuyler like that, and now they were just over.

The doorbell rang a couple of minutes later, and Starr rushed to answer, grateful for the distraction from her heartache. She pulled it open with a friendly smile plastered on her face, but it instantly vanished as her eyes fell on the visitor; a certain familiar blonde woman, her usual smug little smirk on her red painted lips.

"Hey, Starr!" she greeted her with sarcastic brightness. "I don't think we've met. I'm Stacy, _Schuyler's girlfriend_- but then, you already knew that, Schuyler's made sure of it."

Starr swallowed roughly, her head dropping as her insides grew cold.

"What do you want, Stacy?" she muttered weakly, her voice so tired and weary that it sounded pitiful to even _her_. But really, Stacy had already taken back the only thing that mattered to Starr; what else could she possibly do to her?

"I wanna have a quick chat about this," Stacy snapped. Starr glanced up, and her heart plummeted to her feet as she gasped over the sight of Stacy holding up her letter.

"Oh my god," Starr whispered to herself in a panic.

"Yeah, _my_ boyfriend showed me the little love note you left him after he found it this morning- well, I mean, when he stopped laughing."

Starr gripped the doorframe tightly, feeling sick as her head pounded; she was lying, she had to be. Would Schuyler really do that? She couldn't imagine he would, but then, she never would have imagined that he'd be capable of saying the things he had when they'd broken up, or doing what he'd done with Stacy…maybe she just didn't know him as well as she'd always convinced herself she did. The idea sent violent pains throughout her, and Starr frantically fought the urge to cry over the image of him laughing over her letter with Stacy; the other girl didn't deserve that satisfaction.

"You know, this whole desperate act of yours is just backfiring, Starr. He at least used to feel bad for you, feel guilty about hurting you, but you've pushed him way too far with this obsessive crap, and now he's just tired of it."

Starr pressed her lips together to muffle the pained noise threatening to escape her, feeling her anger building as well; what the hell was wrong with Stacy? She had _won_, as she was taking the opportunity to point out right now; what was the point of trampling on Starr's heart and sense of self-esteem even further? Was this just _fun_ for Stacy?

"What, not gonna say anything?" Stacy asked when Starr gave no response, eyeing her. Starr just glared, and Stacy dramatically pouted. "Aw, am I hurting the little girl's feelings? Maybe you should have thought twice before trying to play with the big kids, sweetie- this whole ordeal seems like it messed you up pretty badly, after-all," Stacy laughed, bringing the letter up and scanning it with her eyes. "I mean, you're so depressed that you're having trouble sleeping and eating? That is _so sad_."

Stacy grinned in satisfaction as she saw Starr's shoulders sink even further, the light in her eyes dim even more, and began to really rub the salt in the wound, searching for sections in her letter to read out loud, making her tone simpering and whiny as she spoke.

"I never really knew what love was until we met; I thought what I had with Cole was real, until you came along and shook up my world forever, and made everyone and everything that had come before you seem so insignificant. You might be able to pretend we never happened, but you've left _me_ unable to ever move on, because I know I could never bring myself to just settle again, not after what I felt with you, even if those feelings were never returned." Stacy glanced up, saw Starr's eyes brimming with anger tears, and smiled as she continued. "I never thought I was capable of feeling that kind of love, I'm not sure I even believed it existed. But on the same note, I never thought that I was capable of feeling so much hurt, of having my heart so completely and utterly shattered. After everything that had happened to me, I was a mess when you came along, but you helped fix me…only to break me, worse than before." Stacy scoffed, finally stopping as she rolled her eyes dismissively. "What the hell is that, Starr? For God's sake, you're seventeen, it's pathetic."

"Stacy, when you were seventeen you were obsessed with your sister's boyfriend and had been for years, even though he didn't even know your _name_," Starr exploded, spitting the words in disgust. "You have no room to call anyone pathetic!"

"Oh, really?" Stacy hissed, infuriated by Starr's words; she stalked closer, getting in the younger girl's face, and Starr nervously hedged backwards, quickly regretting her outburst. "I disagree, because there's a difference. Rex wanted me; he hid it, just like he still does now, but I could and _can_ tell."

"You are still obsessed with Rex, aren't you?" Starr demanded in hot disbelief, anger twisting her insides as she realized that was the truth. Stacy had _Schuyler_, and she was still pining for the guy who was barely aware of her existence? Starr was pretty sure she'd never hated Stacy more than at this moment. "Oh my God! You still want him, even though you're with Schuyler!" Stacy shrugged, smirking.

"See, that's the difference between us, Starr. I mean, other than the obvious," she muttered, taking in Starr's appearance with a dismissive look. "Schuyler is my second choice. I don't even want him that badly, and yet he still _loves me_, he still _begged_ me to come back to him, went crazy without me. You, on the other hand, love this guy with all your heart, you're desperate to be with him and have done everything possible to show him that…and he still _doesn't want you_. He still rejected you. He still thinks you're a joke."

Starr clamped her hand over her mouth, but it was too late, and the sob still tore from her lips before she could stop it, as her shoulders trembled violently. Stacy laughed, then gazed at her in mock sympathy.

"Aw, it's okay, honey, that's gotta hurt."

"Shut up, Stacy," Starr hissed, rubbing her eyes.

"You don't like hearing the truth, do you? He doesn't miss you, Starr- trust me, I make sure of that. But, did you honestly not see this coming? How long did you think someone like _you_ was going to keep Schuyler's attention? Can you _really_ blame the guy for losing interest?"

"_Shut up, Stacy_," Starr repeated darkly, a note of warning creeping into her tone.

"I mean, if you're this clingy and desperate after he threw you out on your ass, I can only imagine what you were like as a girlfriend. You can't possibly be worth all the drama your psychotic family causes, or worth him risking his job. I highly doubt you're even any good in bed. And speaking of, honestly, what kind of guy wants a girl who's so damn stupid that she gets herself pregnant and is used up by age sevent-"

Stacy never got to finish her sentence, as something inside of Starr suddenly burst, and without a single thought to it, she pulled her hand back and proceeded to slap Stacy hard across the face.

There was a loud smacking sound as Stacy's head whipped to the side from the force- so great that it stung Starr's own hand-and then the room fell silent for just a moment as Stacy clutched her cheek in shock, until there suddenly came the sound of bright laughter from behind Starr. She quickly turned her head and saw Langston, whom she hadn't even noticed coming back down the stairs thanks to Stacy, watching them with a grin lighting up her face.

More concerned with the girl at the door, Starr immediately turned back around, and saw Stacy removing her hand from her face, revealing the bright, red mark Starr had left. Stacy's eyes slowly narrowed as they burned with rage, and suddenly, just as she was opening her mouth so speak, Starr quickly ripped the letter from her hand, then flung the door shut in her face.

"Oh my God!" she wailed in pure panic, as she whipped around to face her friend. "What did I just do?!"

"Something completely awesome," Langston replied, laughing again.

"_Langston…"_

"Hey, y'know, I thought violence didn't solve anything."

"Langston!" Starr shrieked, wide-eyed. "She is going to totally kick my ass now!"

"No, she's not."

"I can't fight, do you realize that? I can slap people who don't see it coming, that's where my abilities end!"

"What about that incident your parents love to tell people about, when you bloodied that guy's nose-"

"You obviously missed the most important part of the story- it was kindergarten, Langston, we were 5! If we're going to look to my childhood to solve this, then why don't I just go get a snake to bite her while we're at it?!" Starr shouted sarcastically, rapidly dissolving into hysterics.

"Okay, deep breaths , just let me- wait, you got a snake to bite someone when you were a kid?"

"Uh, long story. And we kind of have a more pressing issue here!" she wailed, jumping as Stacy suddenly pounded on the door, and rang the bell repeatedly for good measure.

"You know, I could probably take her, if you want me to," Langston offered. "I am definitely pissed off enough today."

"Oh, no, you couldn't take her, trust me- she's a stripper, Langston."

"…What does that have to do with anything?!"

"Strippers are insane, and they know how to catfight like nobody's business, they have to!"

"And you know this because you've had so much experience with strippers throughout your life?"

"Open the frickin' door, Starr!" Stacy yelled from outside, pounding on it again. "If you want to start something, you better believe we're going to finish it!"

Starr just emitted a noise that could only be described as a squeak, and Langston nearly smiled as she descended the rest of the stairs, stalking to the door.

"Let me handle it, Starr."

"Okay," she agreed instantly, taking a seat on the bottom step and anxiously combing her fingers through her hair.

"Hi, Stacy!" Langston chirped, keeping the door shut.

"Who the hell is this?"

"Someone who knows what an evil hag you are, that's all you really need to know. Now, Stacy, did you forget that it's garbage collection day? Just go sit on the curb with the rest of the trash, and someone will be here to pick you up shortly."

"You little bitch, I'm going to-"

"Stacy, I'm calling security and telling them to get rid of the hooker someone sent to our house as a prank, you should probably go now."

"I should have known better than to expect a couple of spoiled little rich girls to solve their own problems!" Stacy snapped.

"Yeah, I guess you should have. Oh well, stupid you!" Langston calmly shot back in a breezy tone. "Stace, are you a big dog person? I only ask because the security team has a few rotw-"

"I'm going!" Stacy shouted irritably. "Tell Starr she got really lucky this time."

Langston watched through the peephole, and sighed in relief when she saw that Stacy really was walking away. She looked back at the stairs, surprised Starr hadn't said a word or even laughed once throughout all of that, and saw that her friend was hugging her knees tightly to her chest, her head buried against them.

"Starr?"

"Girls?"

Both girls' heads snapped up at the sound of Blair's voice, and Langston winced at the sight of Starr's bloodshot eyes, before turning her attention to Blair, currently standing in the doorway of the living room and gazing at them in confusion.

"Langston, did I just hear you threaten a hooker to get her off our lawn?"

"Um…close enough," Langston answered, shrugging. Blair cocked an eyebrow.

"Is this something I need to know about?"

"I don't think so."

"Something I _want_ to know about?"

"Probably not."

"…carry on," she sighed, leaving the room. Langston grinned as she took a seat by Starr.

"I think I kind of love your mom." Starr barely seemed to notice her presence, continuing to just stare blankly into space. "Hey, Starr, what's wrong?" she asked, her voice soft and gentle. "What did she say to you?"

Starr bit her lip, shaking her head as the tears pierced her eyes against her will, and weakly crumpled against Langston's side as she cried; Langston just hugged her friend tightly, and gently pried away the papers in her hand, wondering what they were. Langston nearly groaned when she it was Starr's letter to Schuyler and realized Stacy must have been the one to find it, and grit her teeth in frustration. Schuyler might think he was protecting Starr with this whole mess, but truth was, he was absolutely destroying her.

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

Were it not for knowing who she was going to have to face there, Starr might have breathed a sigh of relief over reaching the last class of the day; she'd managed to keep Langston away from Lola so far today, and it certainly hadn't been easy- she just had one more class to go, and then she could hopefully get her friend home without incident.

Starr took a deep breath, hovering by the doorway as Langston watched her in confusion. All day, Starr had been worrying about the possibility that Stacy had immediately gone running off to Schuyler after their confrontation and made it sound like it was all _her_ fault; if she had, she was certain Schuyler would immediately take Stacy's side and believe her over Starr.

If he had another little 'talk' with her, told her she needed to get over her obsession with him and leave Stacy alone because it wasn't Stacy's fault he loved her, Starr was going to lose her freaking _mind_, she could not handle that.

"Are you feeling alright, Mr. J?" Starr heard one of the other students ask as they approached the room. "You're not looking so hot."

"I'm fine," Schuyler assured his students. "I just, uh…" Schuyler hesitated uncomfortably for a moment as Starr came into the room. She looked up at him against her own will, and their eyes met for just a moment before Starr quickly looked away. Schuyler swallowed roughly and continued. "Had a bit of a cold last night, it's already passing."

Starr nervously bit her lip, watching Schuyler carefully when she was certain that he wasn't looking her way; she really hoped last night had been a one time mistake. No matter how much he didn't want her, Starr knew she would never be able to just _accept_ Schuyler falling back into his old ways, and she would do whatever it took to stop him if she thought he was, but she didn't exactly _enjoy_ the possibility of forcing her presence on a guy who wanted nothing to do with her. Hopefully, she wouldn't need to.

Starr noticed Schuyler cradling his head, flinching as the bell rang to announce the beginning of class- he really did look like total crap, she had to admit. Well, good, he deserved it for last night.

Class managed to go by fairly uneventfully, though Starr was highly uncomfortable with the fact that instead of avoiding looking anywhere in her general direction, Schuyler had practically stared at her the entire time. She couldn't bring herself to look back long enough to judge his expression- was it because Stacy really had already gotten to him and he was upset with her? Along with sorrow, Starr felt a healthy dose of anger over that possibility; she'd _always_ been on Schuyler's side, even against her best friend and her own _father_. How could he turn on her so easily?

Starr had worked herself up into a near frenzy with all her brooding by the time the bell rang and quickly rose from her seat, ready to grab Langston and storm away to the car.

"Starr!" Schuyler blurted out quickly; Starr froze, taking a deep breath. He hadn't called her Ms. Manning.

"Yes?" she asked slowly.

"May I, uh, speak with you for a moment?"

Starr hesitated; she'd been dreading him saying that, and yet…he didn't sound angry, or defensive, but nervous- about as nervous as _she_ felt. What did that mean?

"Um, okay," she blurted out, starting to walk over to him. "Langston, I'll just be a minute…" Starr began, slowly trailing off when she saw that her friend was already gone. Why would she just run off like th- _oh_, damn it! "Crap!" Starr gasped, cradling her head. "Um, I'm sorry, Sch- Mr. J- I have to go," she said quickly, spinning on her heel and rushing off. She was torn between relief and disappointment over the missed opportunity with him.

"Starr, do you know what Langston's doing?" Markko stopped her near the doorway, appearing lost. "She said she was busy today and just, like, rushed off."

"Oh, ummm…" Starr stalled, searching for the best answer. Should she tell Markko the truth? He could help stop the girls…but, then again, his presence would also remind Langston exactly what she was pissed off about, and remind Lola what she'd been fighting for. Okay, best he didn't know. "It's, uh, just girl stuff, nothing very interesting, but no boys allowed. I don't want to keep her waiting, so I should really go too, bye!" she said quickly, dashing from the room and hurrying off down the halls, to where she knew Lola's last class was.

She finally caught sight of Langston when they were almost there, and sped up, still trailing a few feet behind her; _geez_, Langston was fast when she was pissed.

"Langston!" she hissed, trying not to call any attention to them from students at their lockers, or anybody left in the classrooms. "Langston, will you just stop?! I'll say it again, this won't solve anything!"

"You know what, Starr, maybe it won't, but it's gonna feel really damn good either way, that's enough for me!" Langston called over her shoulder.

They rounded the last corner, and saw Lola gathering her books from her locker; Starr sighed- well, at least she was alone.

"Lola!" Langston snapped, storming over until she was only steps away from her cousin. Starr dashed over and planted herself at her friend's side. "Did you really think you were going to be able to just hide from me after what you did? What you _tried_ to do?"

"Look, Langston, it's not my fault your boyfriend's a scumbag who wants your cousin too!" Lola cried dramatically, looking quite emotional over this; Starr raised her eyebrows. Wow, she was quite an actress. She reminded her a lot of Stacy, actually. "If you want to let that cheater off the hook and turn on your _family_ instead, that's your problem!"

"Oh, please, Lola!" Langston shrieked. Starr swallowed nervously, glancing around at all the other students watching them, snickering, whispering to each other. Wonderful- because the student body here didn't hate her and Langston enough or think they were big enough freaks already. "You may share my blood, but you're not family- family does not do this to each other, family doesn't manipulate and betray and stab each other in the back! _This_ is my family," she snapped, motioning to Starr. "Not you. You could have been, I wanted you to be, but not anymore, not after what you did."

"Oh, _she's_ your family? She and Markko are why you're turning on me! Markko's reasons are obvious, and Starr's jealous of our friendship, she just wants-"

"We have no friendship! And how can you stand here, look me in the eyes, and just keep lying?! You are a sociopath, you realize that?"

"Okay, you don't wanna be mature and talk it out? Fine, whatever. _You_ are a bitch, _you_ realize _that_?"

Langston laughed darkly, sarcastically, for a moment, then suddenly, so quickly that Starr and Lola never saw it coming, clenched her fist and punched Lola in the face. Starr gasped, her hands flying to her mouth, as Lola slammed back into the locker wall, shrieking and cradling her nose.

"Oh, God," Starr moaned anxiously as the noise level from the crowd picked up significantly, and a lot of 'oooh' ing and laughter began. They were starting to crowd around, just waiting for the show to really begin. Starr was pretty sure she'd even just seen a couple of guys run off to tell people about the 'fight.' "Alright, Langston, there you go, you got what you came for, let's _go_."

Langston had no chance to react to that suggestion, as Lola suddenly lunged forward and returned the blow; Langston, however, did not have the moment of stunned silence that her cousin had, and she instantly shoved Lola in return. Immediately, everything seemed to go to hell, as both girls got locked in a struggle, falling to the floor as they kicked, scratched, pulled hair, screaming hysterically at each other, their words unintelligible.

"Hey, guys!" Starr shouted, nervously dodging as they rolled around by her feet. Their onlookers had gone crazy at this point, hooting and hollering, crowding around for a better look, even placing bets, and Starr had to raise her voice. "_Guys, knock it off!_ There are better ways to deal with this! You should just- hey!" Starr shrieked as they collided with her legs and she fell to the ground, hard, getting pulled into the scuffle.

Meanwhile, as this chaos was going on, Cole was blissfully unaware of it all, down at the hall by his own locker, but that was not going to last very long.

"Hey, Thornhart." Cole glanced up, hearing some kid he didn't recognize who had just shown up a moment ago, and had been snickering over something with his friend, call his name.

"What?"

"What are you still doing here? I can't believe you're not rooting your ex on or something."

"Rooting my…what the hell are you talking about?" he demanded. Both guys laughed.

"You didn't hear? Starr and Langston are having this huge fight with Langston's hot cousin- I think someone had already drawn blood by the time I left to tell Trey here about it."

"Damn it," Cole groaned in worry. "Where are they?"

"Right outside Mr. Gracin's class."

"Thanks," he said shortly, slinging his backpack over his shoulder and rushing off.

Right as Cole turned the corner before the final hall, he very nearly smacked right into someone, and glanced up to apologize, only to find himself face to face with Joplin. Both of their faces were hard and angry, Cole furious with the older man for destroying Starr's heart after Cole had walked away for the sake of her happiness, Schuyler under the impression that Cole had taken advantage of Starr after the break-up.

"You heard about the fight?" Cole finally asked simply, his voice cold.

"Yeah."

"Well, let's go."

Both men hurried off, and Cole's jaw nearly dropped when they got there.

"Holy crap," he blurted out. He'd been expecting to see a minor slap fight going on, with maybe a few students milling around and watching, not for the three girls to be rolling on the floor in a tangle, surrounded by a total circus.

"Break it up, girls, _now_!" Mr. Travers shouted, appearing at the other end of the hall, fighting his way through the crowd.

"And all of you, leave, now!" Schuyler ordered the spectators in his 'authoritative teacher' tone. "This is not a show, people!"

They finally managed to reach the trio, and Schuyler instantly swooped down and managed to fish Starr out of the mess, pulling her up and back by her arms. Mr. Travers got hold of Lola, Cole quickly managed to grab Langston, yanking her to him with his arms wrapped firmly around her waist. Starr instantly went silent and limp in Schuyler's arms, just breathing heavily and shaking, not trying to get away (Schuyler didn't seem to notice, though, and continued to hold her to his chest, his hands on her arms), but Langston and Lola continued screaming and flailing, trying to fight off Cole and Travers, still trying to lunge for each other.

"Langston!" Cole snapped, struggling to keep his hold on her. "Hey, Langston, will you just- Langston, knock it off! Hey, psycho," he finally hissed in her ear. "You're making it worse; you wanna be in detention for your entire senior year?"

She finally seemed to hear him, and stopped fighting and making any noise, causing Lola to do the same. All three girls were panting as the guys gazed at them in shock, taking in their scratches and bruises. Starr nervously glanced around, but saw that at least everyone had shuffled off when the teachers had shown up, leaving their little group alone.

"Girls? Would you mind telling us just _what_ you were thinking?" Mr. Travers demanded. There was only silence in response. "No? Well, that's too bad, I guess I'm just gonna have to take you to VP Dickinson and let her sort it out!"

"Wait!" Langston said quickly, sighing. "Starr didn't have anything to do with this. She was trying to stop the fight and just kind of…_literally_ got dragged in. She shouldn't be punished."

Mr. Travers shot a questioning look to Lola, who reluctantly nodded in agreement.

"Very well. Starr, Mr. Joplin will make sure you get cleaned up and then you're free to go. You two, however, are coming with me to the principal's office."

"If I let go, are you gonna divebomb her?" Cole muttered to Langston, who rolled her eyes and glared at him.

"Shut up."

"Langston, I think you broke her nose- I'm seriously not letting go until I'm positive you're not going to murder someone. I'm like, scared of you now," he muttered playfully, succeeding in making her relax slightly, and nearly smile.

"No murders for now."

He let go, and Langston shook herself off, taking a deep breath. Schuyler finally seemed to realize what he was doing and released Starr. The two friends walked a few steps away to talk for a moment, as Mr. Travers waited impatiently.

"I'll see you at home, Starr- I have a feeling you shouldn't wait for me. I'm really sorry," she sighed guiltily. Starr shrugged.

"What are friends for if not to back you up in a catfight?" Langston laughed slightly, and Starr forced herself to smile despite how tense she still felt. "I have to say, we kind of suck, though. It was two against one, and we were still losing."

"Yeah, I don't think we're cut out for this," she mumbled, pressing her fingers to her already swelling eye, and flinched.

"Good luck, Lang."

"Thanks, Starr, for everything."

Starr smiled supportively once more, and Langston turned to walk back to the teacher and Lola; Cole lightly hummed the funeral march as she passed, and Langston resisted the urge to punch his arm- more violence was not going to make her look great right now.

The three of them disappeared down the halls, leaving Starr and her two exes in an uncomfortable, awkward silence, as Schuyler stared at Starr, Cole glared at Schuyler, and Starr kept her eyes on her shoes.

"Okay, um…thanks, guys," she finally sighed, nervously fussing with her hair. "I guess I should probably just go-"

"Starr, you're bleeding," Schuyler told her gently.

"What?" she asked, startled. She brushed her fingers across the side of her forehead, and sure enough, there was blood on her fingertips when she pulled back. "Oh, huh. That girl's fingernails are like _claws_," Starr muttered, shaking her head. "Uh, that's alright, it doesn't even hurt, I'll just-"

"Starr, please just let me take care of it," Schuyler interrupted, his tone almost pleading.

Starr appeared startled, and slowly just nodded, too exhausted to pretend she didn't want to take him up on the offer. Schuyler guided her away to his classroom, leaving Cole staring after them with a downcast gaze.

"Just, uh, have a seat," Schuyler said quietly when they got to the classroom, nodding to his desk.

Starr climbed onto the edge, anxiously fiddling with her hands as she took a deep breath; being alone with him had somehow gone from being the easiest thing in the world to the hardest.

Schuyler fished the first aid kit they kept in the classroom out from under the small sink in the corner, and wet a cloth, walking back over to Starr. He hesitated for a moment, then gently brushed her hair back out of her face, his hand lingering for a moment. Starr shut her eyes, inhaling sharply as she desperately fought to ignore that, to pretend she felt as little as he did.

"Starr," Schuyler began hesitantly as he dabbed the cloth against the cut on her head. "I asked to talk to you earlier because…because I just wanted to apologize for last night."

"Schuyler, no," Starr instantly protested, her voice on the verge of panic. She could not handle getting into this with him right now, she didn't have the strength to keep her walls up, not after everything that happened today. "You don't have to apologize to-"

"_Yes_, I _do_. It's the least of what I owe you, and I-"

"You owe me nothing," she snapped, flinching. She hated the thought of him feeling indebted to his little stalker; she sure as hell didn't want him giving her the time of day again out of some sense of obligation- that was worse than being ignored. "Apologize to yourself, you owed _yourself _better than that."

"You're right," he said softly, lightly wiping the cut with cleansing alcohol. He tried not to smile; Starr's anger was a breath of fresh air after Stacy's attempt to make excuses for him- it was exactly what he needed. "But I never should have put you in that position, it's inexcusable," he continued, his voice thick with guilt and shame. "And I'm just…extremely sorry, and I can promise you that it'll never happen again."

"It won't happen again around me, or it won't happen at all?" she demanded, arching an eyebrow.

"It's not going to happen at all, Starr," he said instantly, his voice firm and intense. "You were right; I could not have been more ashamed or disgusted with myself, and I'm not going to make the same mistake twice, please believe me." Schuyler paused, realizing what he'd said, and laughed darkly at himself, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, I have no right to ask you that. Why would you after last night?"

"Schuyler, no, I do believe you," Starr said softly. "One night doesn't erase everything that came before it. Just don't ever do it again, or I might have to beat you up, okay?"

'Okay," he chuckled as he grabbed a bandaid from the box, before looking up at her with a warm gaze, that momentarily left her breathless. "Hey, Starr, thank you for being mad at me."

"Uh…you're welcome?"

There was a moment of silence as Schuyler applied the bandage, his thumb lightly brushing across her skin, and Starr struggled not to blush.

"So, speaking of beating people up," Schuyler began, chuckling again as he closed the first-aid kit. "I didn't realize that was what 'girl stuff' meant."

"Okay, in my defense, I didn't leave with the intention of beating anyone up, I was trying to stop the fight and it just…didn't work out that way," she laughed.

"A convenient story," Schuyler remarked, his heart lightened that they were actually joking around and _laughing_ together.

"Maybe I _am_ just more violent than I realized," she giggled. "I mean, twice in one day…" Starr slowly trailed off, her face falling as the words escaped her before she could think better of it.

"Wait, what? Twice in one day?" Schuyler repeated, frowning deeply. "Starr, what are you talking about?"

"Nothing," she muttered, hopping down from the desk as Stacy's words began to ring in her ears, almost deafening her to anything Schuyler was saying.

"Starr, you're upset," Schuyler sighed. "It obviously can't be nothing. Why won't-"

"It's none of your business," Starr snapped, abruptly storming from the room before he could see the tears in her eyes.

Starr frantically rubbed the back of her hand across her eyes, taking short, gasping breaths; for a minute there, she had let herself get too comfortable with him, laugh and talk so easily, and it had made it hurt all that much worse when reality came back in, when she remembered that Schuyler wanted nothing to do with her, that he loved that horrible woman, that he was going to hate her as soon as Stacy told him what had happened.

Starr was in such a rush to get away that she failed to notice Cole, still lingering in the halls, watch her go, his jaw setting with determination as he did so, an idea starting to form.

When Langston was finally released after what felt like an eternity, she wandered out of the school and was surprised by the sight of Cole, apparently waiting for her.

"Cole? Hey, what's up, what are you still doing here?" she asked tiredly.

"I needed to talk to you. Look, Langston, I just saw Starr, and yet again, Joplin left her a crying mess, and I'm sick of this crap. Why are we just sitting back and letting this happen? Tonight, I say you and I go to his place, and we fix this."


	19. Chapter 19

"Are you okay, Cole?" Langston asked softly a couple of hours later, as the two of them were killing time (considering that Schuyler had still been at school when they left) by getting dinner. Once they'd formed a loose gameplan about what they were going to do, Cole had fallen silent and spent the rest of the time just glowering.

"The girl with the black eye is asking _me_ if I'm okay?" he cracked. Langston smiled, shrugging.

"I'm just so selfless like that. But seriously, you're being quiet to the point of creepiness, what's up?"

"Is it that hard to believe that maybe someone just doesn't feel like talking to you?"

"Yes," she answered immediately. Cole grinned in spite of himself. "You just upset about Starr or what?" Cole didn't respond. "For the record, Cole, I think it's really cool of you to do this. Not that you and Starr were comparable to me and Markko, because no offense, but you so weren't, but…if this were us, I don't know if I could try to save Markko's relationship with someone else, even if I knew it would make him happy."

"Well, thank God we're not all as selfish as you," he replied playfully. Langston gaped, throwing a wrapper at him.

"Oh, shut up, assface- why do you always have to piss me off these days?" she demanded, her laugh keeping her from sounding truly upset.

"Why do you always make it easy?" he chuckled. She rolled her eyes, then softened as she went quiet, hesitating before deciding to say what she was thinking.

"You're worried about your mom, huh?" she asked gently.

Cole gave a short, uncomfortable nod in response, surprised with himself for offering even that much. Then again, it kind of made sense; Langston was the only person he could ever really get into his mom issues with. Starr _tried_ to understand, but they just didn't…relate on that level, they never really had, much as it pained him to admit she was right about that.

"She'll be fine, Cole," Langston reassured him softly. "I promise, John will keep her safe."

"John being with her is part of the problem," Cole snorted. "He'll keep her safe physically, sure, but, I just…I don't want him to screw with her head anymore than he already has. I know she has feelings for him, but he's got Blair, and I just…" Cole trailed off, shrugging helplessly.

Langston nodded sympathetically, smiling slightly; Marty was the one person Cole loved purely, unconditionally, and when they were talking about her was the only time Langston felt like she was _really_ seeing Cole at his best, his kindest.

"Well, if he does something to hurt her, I'll help you break his kneecaps, okay?" Langston offered, smiling brightly. "Clearly, I have become a very violent person, I might as well embrace my nature, and it's not like I can possibly get into any _more_ trouble, so I have nothing to lose."

"Careful, I might actually take you up on that."

"I'll have the crowbar ready and waiting," she promised. "First we go knock some sense into Schuyler for Starr, then John- albeit, a bit more violently in that case- for your mom. We can make a career of this, become, like, a vengeance seeking duo or something."

"Hey, uh, that reminds me- _should_ we be just a duo here?"

"Uh, not following."

"I mean, should we get Markko involved? I'm kind of surprised you haven't called him yet."

"No! We _can't_ call Markko, he can't see me yet!" Langston suddenly cried in a panic. Cole slowly furrowed his brow.

"What? Why?"

"Because I know he's gonna be pissed at me," she sighed in frustration.

"For…what, exactly?"

Langston motioned to her various bruises and scratches, particularly the black eye which had swollen to the point of making it difficult for her to see, and sighed.

"The fight. It's not exactly the kind of thing he'd approve of, and I just need some time to figure out how to keep him from freaking."

"Just make sure he sees what you did to Lola too- then he'll be too scared of you to risk pissing you off."

"You are the least helpful person _ever._"

"Sorry, sorry. Look, that's just… ridiculous, okay? Lola kissed your boyfriend and tried to steal him from you, what the hell else were you supposed to do? Just let her get away with it?"

"Oh no, see, that's just how you and I view things- it's why I already knew _you'd_ approve- but that's not how Markko sees it, he's more like Starr. He doesn't see it as 'letting her get away with it'; to him, it's 'taking the high road.'"

"You already knew I'd approve?" Cole repeated, cocking an eyebrow. "How's that?"

"In our little group, Markko has always been Starr's counterpart, and you've always been mine," Langston explained, shrugging. "They're the calm, mature, sensitive ones, and we're the emotional, hot-headed, rash and impulsive ones. Someone pisses you and me off, and we just attack, while Starr and Markko, who would let that kind of thing go, stand back and watch in disapproval. Though, of course, they step in against their better judgment before we can get hurt, because they love us anyway." She added cheekily, grinning. "But, now do you see what I mean? You and I are a totally wired the same way, Cole."

"There's a terrifying thought. Do I need to streak my hair purple now?"

"Please, you only _wish_ you could pull that look off," she sniffed, dramatically flipping her hair.

Cole laughed quietly, offering her a slight smile.

"True, true. You know, uh…I guess there are worse people I could be compared to."

"Wow, thanks for the overwhelming compliment, my ego just expanded ten sizes," she deadpanned. Cole grinned again.

"Look, Langston, if Markko does get upset with you for what you did, then he's an idiot, because in my opinion, you were pretty awesome today," Cole told her sincerely. Langston smiled, pleased. "There, was that one good enough?" he added playfully.

"Eh, close enough," she giggled.

"You know, you could always be really over the top and cry when you tell him, pretend like you're in a lot pain and just keep saying how sorry you are- no way he would be mad at you then."

"That's…actually a good idea," Langston remarked, though she knew herself well enough to know it wouldn't work; the second Markko called what she had done stupid or something, she'd snap and defend her decision, she didn't have enough restraint to pretend to be sorry when she wasn't for very long. "Thank you, Cole. So you _can_ be useful when you want to be," she said brightly, surprised she was enjoying herself so much right now. "God, it's been like, forever since we hung out, just us, hasn't it?"

"Yeah. I guess we haven't exactly been on the greatest terms lately." Langston flinched- true.

"I guess not. Hey, um, Cole? I'm sorry about how I went off on you that day at the café."

"It was the least of what I deserved," he muttered weakly.

"I'm not gonna disagree, but, I don't know…I could have done something to help keep you from getting to that state instead of just expecting Starr to save you." Cole said nothing, appearing uncomfortable. Langston smiled as she quickly changed the subject. "Hey, y'know, I still have that snap bracelet- that one you gave me after I told you about how my _mom_ used to give them to me?"

"I remember," he said quietly, smiling back at her finally.

"I've just been waiting to find the perfect outfit to wear it with. I have to say, I still think that's probably the nicest present anyone's ever given me. When you were being this big loser jerk, I should have tried a little harder to remember that moment instead of just getting pissed at you and giving up," she remarked sadly.

"Oh, God, are you going to get all emotional or something now?" Cole groaned dismissively. "Come on, Langston."

"And I immediately take that last remark back!" Langston shouted , shaking her head as she rose to her feet, laughing slightly. "Getting pissed at you is obviously the right course of action after-all."

"I don't-"

"Shut up before you dig yourself in deeper, okay? Now, you ready to go do this, partner? Schuyler should be home by now."

"You have no idea how ready I am."

"Hey, stick to the gameplan- please don't do something stupid."

"I make no promises. If he keeps refusing to see reason and insists upon acting like a moron, I'm either going to kill him or myself. Or maybe I'll just kill two birds with one stone, make it a murder suicide," he muttered.

"Look, he'll see reason. If we don't talk him into it, this will," Langston stated confidently, pulling some papers from her purse. Cole frowned questioningly. "Remember that letter of Starr's I told you about? This is it. After the incident this morning that I also told you about, she just kind of dropped it on the stairs, so I grabbed it, just because I knew the last thing she needed was her family or the staff finding it."

"What the hell could she have said for that many pages? Even when I was at my most upset with Starr, I don't think I ever had that much to say. Let me see," he requested, pulling the letter towards him.

"You can't read that, you ass!" Langston squealed, yanking it back.

"Have you?"

"…Maybe."

"Hypocrite!"

"Hey, I'm allowed, best friends are an extension of each other."

"You are making crap up as you go along." Langston just shrugged, still hugging it to her chest defensively, and Cole gave up. "Whatever. Hey, speaking of making it up as we go along, what if Stacy's there? I didn't even think of that."

"Oh, trust me, I did."

"And…?"

"And if Psycho Bitch Barbie is there, I will drag her into the street by her pretty blonde hair and hold her down until a car runs her over," Langston hissed, recalling her white hot fury when Starr had told her everything Stacy said to her. Cole slowly blinked, startled, and then smirked in admiration.

"_Awesome._"

***~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~***

In his room at the ASM, Schuyler was just in the middle of the usual nightly routine he had when Stacy wasn't there to distract him- a whole lot of brooding and pining and very little else.

He was abruptly drawn from his dark thoughts sooner than expected, though, as there was suddenly a loud, insistent pounding on his front door. Schuyler started, furrowing his brow. Who the hell would be coming to see him that would announce their presence like that?

Todd Manning was the only person who came to mind, and Schuyler looked to the door in disbelief; he had already given Todd exactly what he wanted- what the hell could he possibly still want? If Todd was here even after what Schuyler had given up to make more threats and demands, Schuyler was going to lose it.

"Geez, Cole, way to be overdramatic. A simple knock wouldn't have worked?"

"We're trying to make a statement here, Langston."

Schuyler's disbelief only grew, though his worry disappeared, and he just groaned as he made his way to the door, startling the teens as he flung it open.

"_What?_" he snapped in greeting. Langston arched an eyebrow.

"Um, hi, rude much?" she asked breezily, calming walking past him into his room, causing Cole to follow. Schuyler just shook his head; thank God Roxy was the only person ever downstairs- the last thing he needed was for the school to know that students apparently just came and went from his room as they pleased. "Should I just have a key made for everyone in the class?" he demanded upon shutting the door and turning to discover Langston making herself at home on the couch.

"Well, it would certainly be convenient, but that's up to you. So, hi, Schuyler! I forgot to say that." Schuyler glanced at Cole, who was uncomfortably leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, glowering at him, before responding.

"It's Mr. Joplin," he informed her, his voice cold as ice. Langston rolled her eyes, unaffected.

"I'm not Starr, you're not going to get rid of me by hurting my feelings," she informed him bluntly, pleased when he flinched and looked pained by her words. "And no, it's Schuyler right now, because this is a personal visit."

"Okay, you need to get out. You are _students,_ I can't _have_ personal visits with you- why is that so hard for everyone to comprehend?!" Schuyler demanded, before sighing and realizing how incredibly stupid that was. "Because I'm the one who acted like that was acceptable, I know. But I'm trying to fix that, and I need you to accept it and let me draw those boundaries that should have been put up a long time ago."

"No," she said simply, shrugging. "I'm not going anywhere, because I'm here on Starr's behalf. I thought it would be best in the long run to let you deal with your issues in your own time and sort it out yourself, but it's become obvious that's not the case, so I'm here for her." Schuyler swallowed roughly, quickly putting on the mask- the cold, unfeeling eyes.

"I have nothing to say about Ms. Manning, she's in the past as far as I'm concerned- that book is closed."

Before Langston and Schuyler could continue their little argument, Cole, out of nowhere, suddenly pushed himself off the wall and slammed his fist hard into Schuyler's jaw.

"Cole!" Langston shrieked, jumping to her feet as Schuyler's head snapped around and he went unnervingly still, just cradling his jaw as he took a deep, calming breath, his shoulders shaking for a moment. "What happened to the gameplan?! Because I don't recall punching him in the face being part of it!"

"I didn't anticipate how much hearing him be an asshole to Starr was going to piss me off, sorry!" Cole retorted sarcastically.

"Me?!" Schuyler shouted back in anger as he lost it, straightening up and looking at him with eyes that could kill. He clenched his fists, begging himself to keep it under control, and above all else, to definitely not retaliate like that tiny little dark part of him left over from his old life was screaming for him to. There was no such thing as a fair fight between him and Cole- if he ever truly lost that control, he'd kill the kid without even trying. "_I'm_ being an asshole to Starr? I'm trying to protect her even when it means ripping my own heart out, Cole; if you wanna be mad about someone _hurting_ her, then maybe you should be pissed at yourself."

"Why's that?!" he yelled back just as loudly. Langston nervously looked back and forth between them, quickly darting between the two boys to make sure they stay separated; Schuyler and Cole getting into a knock down drag out fight had so not been part of the plan.

"You're _with_ Starr already? What, were you lying in wait, just _dying_ for the chance to- oh, what was it, the thing you constantly accuse me of doing- take advantage of her? What the hell is _wrong_ with you? If you actually want her like _that_, then you're sick."

"Hey, despite what you both seem so fond of accusing the other of, Starr's not the kind to let herself be taken advantage of!" Langston jumped in, irritated. That accusation (which seemed to be _constantly_ flung around these days) was so friggin' insulting.

"And I'm not even with her, dumbass!" Cole snapped. "Funny thing is, she did try to push for that, after you broke her heart, and I told her _no_, because taking advantage isn't really my thing, and being with a girl who only wants someone else _definitely_ isn't. If Starr told you she's with me, then she was just trying to make you jealous- and it obviously worked, so hey, two points her."

Schuyler was silent, his anger dissipating, confusion appearing in it's place.

"Wait, so you and Starr aren't…?"

"_No,_, not ever again."

Langston smiled smugly as Schuyler, just standing there, obviously stunned and relieved by this.

"Wow. So, you seem like you're about to rip Cole's head off because you think he moved in on her too soon, but no, you _totally_ don't care about her," Langston chirped with a sarcastic smile, before growing serious. "I don't buy this crap you've been selling about not loving or wanting Starr, not for a second."

"That's your prerogative, but it doesn't change the reality of the situation," he hissed.

"What reality? The one where my best friend is absolutely devastated, crushed, and can't turn to the only person who would usually make her better in this situation because he's the one responsible?"

"She seems fine to me- I'm sure she'll get over it," Schuyler replied darkly.

"No, she won't!" Cole shouted, kicking the desk in frustration. "I _wish_ she would more than anyone, but it's not going to happen. It's easy for you to say when you've been avoiding her, but we see Starr everyday, we can _see_ that she's never going to get over this. God, you are so oblivious; you think because she looks fine in your class or something it means she's over it? _You_ probably seem fine in your class too, but you're obviously _not._ She's _faking it_, just like you, because it's the only thing keeping her alive."

"That's part of the problem, isn't it?" Langston asked slowly, cocking her head as she studied Schuyler's face carefully. "You don't even seem to realize you said it, but you just admitted that pushing her away was like ripping out your own heart, so your feelings aren't the problem here- hers are. You're scared to let yourself trust that she's not really fine, that she's not really going to get over you. A part of you is terrified that Todd's right, that this is a phase or something that Starr will move on from. You really think you're that unimportant to Starr, that you're something she can just get over? That's _so_ unfair, Schuyler. You can love her, but you won't trust that she can love you?"

"She's seventeen," was his simple, quiet response. Langston rolled her eyes.

"And she's had a baby, lost a baby, got baby back only to give her up again, been kidnapped or held hostage like, half a dozen times, gone through thinking her parents were missing, dying, or dead too many times to count, grew up with Todd Manning as her father period, dealt with a friend struggling with drug addiction, and been the peacekeeper and caretaker for her family and all of her friends for as long as anyone can remember, and that's like, just scratching the surface. We all know Starr is not seventeen at heart or mind, and I don't believe you think that's a real reason so much as a convenient excuse you can use to push her away."

"I'm with _Stacy,_" he reminded her, relieved he had thought ahead, prepared Stacy as a cover. "And I love her very much."

"Bullshit," Cole snapped, gritting his teeth. "I'm not exactly your biggest fan, but even I don't think you're a big enough jackass to love her- only a real tool could possibly _love_ that psycho. Speaking of, were you aware that Starr overheard you telling your little girlfriend about how Starr couldn't compare to her?" Schuyler inhaled sharply.

"What?" he choked out.

"Yeah- at the hospital. She overheard you telling Stacy about how you never really loved Starr, how you just turned to her out of convenience, how Stacy was who you really wanted all along. So, thank God you 'protected' Starr by doing that, right?" Cole sneered.

"Oh, God, Starr was never supposed to hear that," Schuyler said in despair, digging his fingers into his hair. The thought of Starr overhearing that absolutely crushed him.

"You shouldn't have _said it_ at all, asshole," Cole thundered.

"I was trying to keep Starr safe!" he shouted back in frustration.

"From what?!"

"_From me_!" Schuyler exploded.

Langston all at once looked satisfied by the admission and sympathetic towards Schuyler's obviously torn, distressed state, while Cole rolled his eyes. Why was Schuyler so determined to be difficult? If he was the one Starr wanted, nobody would be able to keep Cole from Starr, but especially not _himself._

"Schuyler, come on. Why do you think that?" Langston pushed.

"Because you know what, I was wrong earlier, about what the reality of this situation is. The true _reality_ is, I'm Starr's teacher, I'm a drug addict, she's been assaulted because of me, she's lost her father because of me, she's lost her reputation at school because of me. How much more do you want her to lose, Langston?"

"Schuyler, things between Todd and Starr have been seriously messed up for a long time, and she's basically hated him ever since this one came along," Langston informed him, jabbing her thumb over her shoulder at Cole, who shrugged and nodded in confirmation. "So that's so not on you. Besides, you staying away wouldn't fix their relationship; just the opposite- when you broke up with her, Starr stormed over to Todd's and told him it was all his fault, then said she never wanted to see him again and told him to go to hell. She's always gonna choose you over him, even if you never have anything to do with her again.

"And the reputation thing? Are you _kidding?_ That was destroyed before you even came to town- she was a _pregnant teenager_, hello? Hell, the things the kids were saying about her after she kissed you were actually incredibly nice when compared to what people said when she was pregnant." Langston noticed Schuyler clenching his fists in anger as she told him how Starr had been treated during her pregnancy, and even now, she couldn't help but smile, finding his protectiveness cute. "You're not a drug addict, not anymore, I think you guys are well beyond the teacher issue, and blaming Zach Rosen's actions on yourself is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. And what else do I want her to lose? Well, I don't know- she's already lost her heart thanks to you, so there's nothing else she has left that even matters."

"I didn't want to hurt her with the Stacy thing," Schuyler said weakly, his eyes greatly pained. "At least, not as badly as I apparently did."

"Schuyler, why did you involve Stacy at all? I don't get that part."

"I didn't think I had the strength to stay away from Starr again if I didn't have something holding me back, and Starr knows I love her, I didn't see how just breaking up with her was going to convince her that had changed- I needed her to see proof, to make sure she and I kept away from each other, so I couldn't hurt her."

"So, you hurt her to avoid…hurting her? That doesn't make _sense_, Schuyler!" Langston shouted hysterically. "And that's just it! She _doesn't know_ that you love her, not at all," Langston told him, desperate for him to understand this. Schuyler looked at her with surprised eyes, obviously hurt by the idea of Starr not understanding how he felt for her. "Starr has always felt like she wasn't good enough for you, that it was just her huge lucky break that you wanted to be with her- you not wanting her just makes _sense_ to Starr."

"That's _ridiculous,_ I'm the one who's not good enough for her. _I'm_ the one who got lucky, _she's_ the one who deserves better."

"Wow, you two really are perfect for each other," Langston muttered in frustration. "And you are both going to drive me insane with your insistence that the other is better off without you. Where is this coming from, Schuyler? You guys were _so_ happy together before the…Zach incident," she finished slowly in realization, sighing. "And right before that was the Todd thing, which-"

"I don't care about Todd Manning's threats," Schuyler snorted dismissively- fear of Starr's father had not been a factor in his decision. Langston smiled in surprise.

"Oh. Well, good. But there was something else, what was it?" Langston struggled to remember, Zach and the break-up having dwarfed the issues Starr had mentioned to her beforehand. She gasped as she suddenly remembered, whipping around to shoot her friend a death glare. "Oh, damn it, Cole, the other incident was _you!_"

"Hey, I was _high_ when I came over here to confront him!"

"That's your _defense?!_ That makes you sound even _worse!_"

"Cole didn't point out anything that wasn't true, that I shouldn't have already thought about," Schuyler snapped.

"Man, what the hell are you talking about?" Cole snorted. "I hate to admit this, but the _truth_ is that not a word of what I said was true. Like I said, I was high, I was pissed, and I was out of my mind with jealousy, I was just throwing out the worst accusations that came to mind. I can barely even remember what I said that day. Something about you using her? That's obviously not true, or you'd still be with her right now. I was wrong about her only turning to you because she couldn't have me; Starr just doesn't want me and hasn't for a long time, she chose you because she…loves you," he grumbled reluctantly. "It had nothing to do with me. And Langston's right, Starr's too strong to be taken advantage of, that didn't happen. And she knows what she wants, so I sincerely doubt she would have developed some stupid little crush based solely on the fact that you were someone to talk to. So don't try to use me as one of your excuses to continue being a coward, okay?"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me," Cole snapped. "I don't buy this whole noble, just trying to protect Starr even at your own expense crap. It doesn't look like this is about you being strong enough to push her away for her own good. I think it's about you being a _coward_, and you being weak, and you being afraid to trust that Starr is always going to love you and that the two of you will beat the odds and work out."

"I wouldn't use the word coward, and I do think you're genuinely trying to keep Starr safe, but…I do think- the fear and insecurity and everything- is _part_ of it," Langston agreed softly, as Schuyler bowed his head, his shoulders stiff- she had a feeling they'd hit a nerve. "Schuyler, I just…I don't _know_ how else to put this to make you understand. You're good enough for Starr, and you're just plain good _for_ her. The bad things that happen to her are _not_ your fault, and she's not missing out on anything because of you. It's just the opposite, actually. When you and Starr were together, it was the happiest I had _ever_ seen her- I'm not saying she was miserable before you came along or anything, but with you, it's just…another level completely, I've never seen her that way before. And you being _with_ her keeps her safe, you protect her. Just look at what happened with Zach!"

"Starr was only in that house with him in the first place because of me!"

"No," Cole interjected, intense guilt in his voice. "Starr was there because yet again I ran to her dad and tattled on her about something that was none of my business, she was there because I pissed her off so much that it made her snap at Jack, she was there because Jack acts like a mini Todd sometimes and made a mistake, she was there because Todd's a psychopath and she knows she has to prevent him from literally committing murder. _We_ were why she was there, _you_ were the one that saved her, which is why I thought you might actually be an okay guy and backed off in the first place."

"I didn't _save_ her- she never would have been alone with him for so much as a minute if I had. He _hurt her_," Schuyler spat, his voice hot with anger. Langston felt pretty certain that Zach Rosen was a dead man if Schuyler ever saw him again. "And when I finally got there, I snapped and almost beat someone to death with my bare hands right in front of her, when she was already terrified- how am I any better than Todd Manning?"

"Uh, 'cause Todd beats up people he finds mildly irritating or that have the nerve to love his daughter, while you beat up a guy that held Starr hostage with a gun, and threatened to rape her-it's not exactly the same thing," Langston replied dismissively, rolling her eyes. "And Starr didn't care about what you did- if anything, she was grateful. Guilty as you feel about that night, do you realize that you were the only person that made Starr feel safe after what Zach did to her? She was fine immediately afterwards because you were there, but now that you're gone, on the nights when she actually manages to get some sleep around her crying, she sometimes has nightmares about him. So I don't see how you staying away makes her any _safer._"

"Yeah. Dude, can you just quit making excuses? It's really annoying. This is so damn simple, it really is- you love Starr. She loves you. Regardless of whether or not _you_ think you're good enough for Starr, _she_ does," Cole snapped, crossing his arms. "So, do you just have zero respect for her or what?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"If she's decided she wants you, it's pretty damn disrespectful and patronizing for you to decide you know better than her and take yourself out of the picture anyway."

"Cole's got a point, Schuyler. Look, um, Starr…she told me what you said when you were drunk- that you always make her cry. But thing is, that's not true, Schuyler, _you_ don't make her cry, you _staying away_ from her does."

"You know about that and you're still here?" Schuyler asked quietly, shaking his hand. "I still can't believe I did that. Why would Starr want anything to do with me after that?"

"Because you made one mistake?" Cole snorted. "Do you remember all the horrible things I did when I was constantly getting high? Starr wasn't even my friend at the time, she didn't even particularly like me, and she still forgave those constant screw-ups, even when I physically hurt her. I think she might- just might- forgive the guy she's in love with for one night of weakness."

"Hey, speaking of last night," Langston said slowly, furrowing her brow deeply.

She suddenly gave Schuyler a violent smack upside the back of his head, and followed it up with a punch to the arm.

"Ow," he muttered, looking at her in surprise and rubbing the back of his head.

"That's what you get, stupid!" she snapped. "Why would you risk your recovery like that, what's wrong with you?"

Schuyler almost laughed grimly to himself over the fact that Langston, whom he barely knew, cared more about what he'd done than Stacy had.

"I don't know," he mumbled, shamefaced.

"Liar," she accused. "You were there because living without Starr made you so miserable that you lost yourself, which is exactly what's happening to her. Look, I get that you think Starr is better off without you, but she doesn't agree- _we_ don't agree- and you two love each other and you're falling apart on your own. So here's what it comes to down to, Schuyler; do you hate yourself _more_ than you love Starr?"

"Of course not," Schuyler replied instantly, knowing that there was nothing he felt more strongly than his love for Starr. He sighed, his head feeling like it was spinning; Langston made sense, but it wasn't easy to convince yourself you'd been wrong about something you were so strongly convinced of. "I'm just…still not convinced being with her is the right choice. Even if being with me isn't…_dangerous_ for her, it's still _unfair_. She deserves someone who can love her publicly, who doesn't have to keep her a secret, someone who can take her to her own prom or actually go with her to the hospital when she's hurt," Schuyler told them brokenly, his eyes heavy. Langston sighed.

"So, she 'deserves' to be with a guy she could never truly love or give her heart to since you already have it? She 'deserves' to have to just settle for mediocrity, second best? She 'deserves' a guy who couldn't possibly love her as much as you do? Let me tell you something, Schuyler- prom? Not that much fun when you don't love the person you're going with. Being able to go to the movies with a guy you just kind of like doesn't compare to sneaking around with one you love. Being comforted by someone in public won't help if it's not someone you love so much that they always make you feel safe when nobody else does. It's the _person_ you're with that matters, not _what_ you do when you're together."

Schuyler looked hopeful but still not entirely convinced, and Langston sighed, deciding it was time for the final push.

"Okay, tell you what, Schuyler; read even just the first page of this and tell me how what you're doing now could possibly be good for her," Langston ordered, fishing the papers out of her purse. "It's this letter Starr adds to whenever she's upset about you, to try to make herself feel better- for the record, she never does."

Schuyler appeared startled, and accepted the letter, beginning to read. Langston watched his reaction carefully, seeing his face quickly fall as he read in Starr's own words how utterly crushed she was, how devastated he'd left her, how much she loved him. His eyes looked completely anguished, filled with intense guilt and regret; he looked as though he were in physical pain, like he'd just been punched in the gut, and Langston could see that Schuyler _finally_ understood that he'd made a mistake, that he hadn't protected her, he'd nearly destroyed her.

Langston was caught off guard by how sad she was for _Schuyler_ now, knowing that at least a part of him had honestly thought Starr would react any differently than this. If she were to ever do something stupid like break-up with Markko for his own good, even though she'd want him to be happy, thinking he was okay without her while she'd been left a mess would still hurt like hell.

She glanced back at Cole, and saw that even he looked sympathetic with Schuyler now- Cole knew from experience that realizing you'd hurt Starr was just about the worst feeling in the world.

"Do you get it now?" Langston asked gently as Schuyler finished reading.

Schuyler opened his mouth to reply, but his throat felt tight and he pressed his fist to his mouth, giving a short nod instead. His heart felt like it was in pieces on the floor, knowing he had done and said such horrible things to the girl he loved more than anything in the world for _nothing_- he hadn't 'protected' her at all, he had just severely broken her. He was an _idiot_, and an asshole, and about a thousand other awful things. He recalled Starr's teary eyes when she'd taken him home from the bar- he'd thought she was just disappointed in him, but now, knowing he'd put that expression on her face by breaking her heart, absolutely _killed_ him- for a moment, Schuyler truly felt like he couldn't breathe.

"So, I don't have to kill either one of us after-all," Cole muttered to Langston, seeing that Schuyler was so out of his mind with guilt and pain right now that he wasn't even aware of them. Langston managed to tear her sympathetic eyes away from Schuyler long enough to shoot Cole a quick, smug smile.

"You can thank me for my awesome powers of persuasion later." She returned her attention to Schuyler and placed a supportive hand on his arm; his shoulders sagged weakly in response. "Hey, Schuyler, please don't go feeling even worse about yourself because of this, _please_; you honestly thought you were making the best choice for Starr, you didn't mean to hurt her, and getting all angsty over this isn't going to fix anything. Only finally talking to Starr and being _honest_ with her is."

"Are you sure she's even going to want anything to do with me after what I've put her through?" he asked, his tone so miserable that even Cole had to find it sad.

"Schuyler, remember, what was the entire point of this little lesson? _Starr loves you_, unconditionally, for better or worse, for good, blah blah blah, please get the point already, I don't know how else to get it across," she requested, giggling so he'd know she wasn't upset. Schuyler remained stone-faced, too overwhelmed by the darkness of what he was currently feeling to be amused."It's probably going to be tough to get her over here, but that's okay, I'll handle that part…you _do_ want to see Starr tonight, right?" Langston asked cautiously.

"Yes!" Schuyler quickly replied, his tone so eager and nervous that it made Langston smiled. "Yes, if she wants to see me. I've lied and hurt us both for long enough, I just want to fix this."

"Good," Langston said happily. "Then I'll get her here, and you're just going to have to convince her that you're not suddenly saying you want her again out of pity or something, because I bet you that's what she's going to think, especially after the whole drunk incident and what Stacy said- oh my God!" Langston abruptly shouted, startling both of the boys. "I didn't tell you what the evil whore said yet!"

"_What?_" Schuyler suddenly demanded harshly; he had made it clear to Stacy when he'd started this little charade that she was never to go near Starr. "Stacy said something to Starr? When?"

"This morning," Langston informed him grimly. "Starr actually left her letter here last night before she left, on an impulse, but I guess Stacy found it instead of you."

"_Shit,_" Schuyler muttered darkly, already clenching his fists, knowing what was next to come wouldn't be good. Stacy was an extremely possessive person- it was the reason why he'd had to listen to her rant about how Rex was _hers_ so many times back in Vegas, despite the fact that they'd spoken about one time and she hadn't seen him in years. And though she cared about Rex a thousand times more than she did Schuyler, because of their history, Schuyler knew she felt like he _belonged_ to her even more strongly than she did Rex- and Stacy didn't tolerate people trying to take things that were _hers._

"Yeah, shit. Stacy came over to the house this morning and was so cruel to Starr that it was just…sick. She claimed that you found the letter first and showed it to her, laughing. She told Starr that you were tired of her being so obsessive and pathetic, that you think she's a joke. She rubbed it in that you're her second choice and yet you love her so much that you begged her to take you back, while Starr loves you more than anything and you still don't want anything to do with _her_. And I came in at the end, so that's even just what I could get Starr to tell me; she _ruined_ her self esteem, Schuyler, and I expect you to do something about it, with both Stacy and Starr."

"And you damn well better break things off with her before Langston gets Starr over here," Cole interjected. Schuyler narrowed his darkened eyes.

"Trust me, that won't be a problem," he hissed, infuriation twisting his stomach as he thought about what Stacy had done.

"Good. Well," Cole noted, glancing at his watch. "If Langston's going to get Starr over here and we're going to leave you enough time to dump Stacy on her ass first, Langston and I should probably go."

"_Thank you_ for listening to reason, Schuyler," Langston said to him with immense relief as she grabbed her bag, smiling. "I'm really happy you and Starr are going to work this out."

"No, God, Langston, thank _you_," Schuyler said emphatically. "I have been crushing the person I least want to hurt in the entire world for reasons that you just made me realize were completely pointless, and you saved me from doing that any longer and making us both miserable. _Thank you._"

"I was very happy to do it. Good luck with Starr, okay?" she said warmly, smiling as she walked to the door to wait for Cole.

"Sorry about punching you," Cole muttered as he passed Schuyler. Schuyler, whose mood had been significantly lifted by the thought of fixing this mess and finally being with Starr again, gave a quiet chuckle.

"I deserved it."

"Glad you can admit that. Don't make us have to do this again, okay?" Cole told him, pausing after he opened the door to give this one last message. "Because if there's a next time, I will kick your ass. Actually, no, scratch that," Cole said quickly, looking to the girl at his side with a grin. "I'll get Langston here to beat the crap of you, that's a much scarier threat. She'll do it, don't think she won't- just look at her face, she's a scrapper."

"Oh my God," Langston groaned, gripping Cole's shirt and yanking him out the doorway. "Bye, Schuyler! I'll have Starr here in two hours, be ready for some serious wooing!" she called over her shoulder before shutting the door. Cole snickered, and she glared at him as they walked down the hall. "Okay, how long are these jokes going to last?" she demanded irritably.

"I'm not going to put a time limit on something that brings me so much joy."

"You know, Starr was there too, why doesn't she get this treatment? She beat someone up too!"

"Uh, no, Starr literally got _dragged_ into the fight and somehow proceeded to get her ass kicked even though you guys were double teaming Lola- I can make fun of her too if you want, but it's going to be for a very different reason," Cole laughed. Langston rolled her eyes, huffing. "Okay, okay, I'll stop. So, I have to ask, how are you getting Starr here?"

"I have to figure that out in the next ten minutes- don't give me that look, I'll come up with something. I am going to make that girl happy again, even if I have to drag her down here kicking and screaming."


	20. Chapter 20

"Staaaarr!" Langston sang out brightly as she approached her friend's room, unable to believe she was in such a good mood after the way this day had started.

She'd been hoping to get home before the school could call and dodge all the adults, but that hadn't exactly happened- Dickinson had called long ago, and Dorian had actually been standing in front of the door waiting for her, which had nearly given Langston a heart attack. To her complete shock, though, Dorian had actually taken the Cole route and congratulated her for fighting for what was hers, though she recommended taking a more subtle approach to revenge in the future, going for the psychological instead of physical- apparently, catfights were very unbecoming.

She'd forced her to then sit through another long talk about losing her virginity, which was punishment enough itself as far as Langston was concerned, and to Langston's mortification, made sure she still had the condoms she'd given her that morning, before quietly telling her that her punishment would begin _tomorrow_, apparently realizing Langston would just sneak out if she grounded her tonight anyway.

_However,_ Starr didn't need to know any of this had happened; Langston fully intended to use Starr thinking she needed to sneak out to have one last night of freedom to her advantage.

"Starr, are you ready to…" Langston slowly trailed off as she opened the door to Starr's room, and was greeted by music blaring from the stereo. She squinted, trying to see where Starr was as the room was in total darkness, and finally spotted a lump under the covers. "Uh, Starr?" she shouted over the music. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Listening to my theme song," Starr wailed dramatically.

"Oh, God, you're turning into me, I don't know how I feel about that," Langston muttered to herself. She listened to Starr's supposed theme song curiously, and groaned when she recognized that it was "Little Miss Obsessive." "Okay, first of all, don't ever call something sung by Ashlee Simpson your theme song, that's disgusting."

She managed to locate the stereo remote and quickly turned the music off with a relieved sigh, also flicking on a lamp before tossing the covers off her friend; Starr sighed but didn't complain and pulled herself up to a sitting position, flinching as light flooded her eyes. They adjusted a minute later, and Starr suddenly gasped as she looked her friend.

"Yeah, I know, my eye looks disgusting."

"Oh, um, no, no," Starr struggled to reassure her. "It's not that bad, I just-"

"No, it's okay, I've accepted it," Langston informed her, smiling. Starr managed a small giggle before gazing at her sympathetically.

"So, what'd you get?"

"Two day suspension, and I'm going to be selling tickets for every school event from here on out until I graduate, and doing various other odd jobs around the school," Langston sighed.

"Ouch, that sucks. Dorian know yet?"

"Would I be here talking to you if she did? Nobody's seen you either, right?"

"Nope, I made sure to be stealthy for you."

"Whew, okay, good. That's what I'm here for, actually; I'm pretty sure this is the last night of freedom I'm going to have for a good long while, and you need to come out so I can celebrate properly and go out with a bang." Starr suddenly burst out laughing, then blushed and looked at her apologetically. Langston frowned in confusion for a moment, then raised an eyebrow as she got it. "Excuse me, gutter mind, were you just thinking about Operation Deflower?"

"Sorry," Starr said sheepishly, laughing.

"No, don't be- I've finally corrupted you, that's awesome."

"I, um, just assumed that if this is your final night of freedom, you might want to...put that plan into action," Starr explained awkwardly.

"Oh, I do. Assuming I can convince Markko not to be furious with me because of the fight, you're totally going to be sexiled at some part of the evening, but you can and should have fun with us up until then."

"Sexiled?"

"It's _so_ a word. You know, this is not exactly how I pictured it," Langston sighed in disappointment. "I just had this visual of us getting all dressed up, and going out to some fancy, elegant restaurant, and then going to a really nice hotel and having this beautiful room, all filled with candles and roses…not me, like, jumping him because it might be the last chance I get, looking all gross like this. Part of me feels like I should hold off until we can have that fantasy, but I know I can't wait any longer to be with him."

"Oh, Langston; first of all, you do _not_ look gross, far from it, and even if you did, it so wouldn't matter, none of it would. I can tell you personally that the fancy room and perfect mood setting and nice clothes aren't what make the moment great- honestly, I think when two people _really_ love each other, all of that is unnecessary- being with each other is all that matters."

"You can tell me personally?" Langston repeated, curiously cocking her head to the side. "Are you talking about you and Cole?"

Starr suddenly froze, her eyes clouding over, and Langston flinched- could she be any stupider? Starr might not have ever made love with Schuyler, but they'd come close enough, she'd obviously be referring to him.

"Um, no," she said softly, bowing her head and taking a deep breath; God, she was so _exhausted_ from constantly struggling with this aching feeling in her chest. "I was thinking of Schuyler, and the after prom incident I told you about, actually," she admitted roughly, willing herself not to freak out and make this moment about herself when the focus needed to be Langston. "I was just in those ratty sweats I always wear at sleepovers, I was totally plain, we were just in his room at the ASM, and you know that place is not exactly 'elegant', and it was just another night, nothing particularly special about that one, but when I try to think about a perfect moment, that's the one that comes to mind," Starr said softly, shooting Langston a smile even as tears stung her eyes. "So don't worry about this not being the perfect fantasy you had in mind, okay?"

"Okay; thank you for the perspective, you're right," Langston agreed, smiling. "The two of us being together is all that matters, not where it happens." Starr just nodded in agreement as she sniffed, swiping her eyes with her sleeve; Langston, as usual, read her needs perfectly and pretended not to notice. "So, are you going to hurry up and get ready for my last night of freedom, or am I going to have to drag you of bed?"

"Believe it or not, I'm actually not going to fight you for once," Starr laughed, sliding out of bed and settling in front of her mirror. She fussed with her hair for a second then cautiously peeled the bandage off, sighing when she saw the cut was already closed and hardly noticeable; awesome, she'd subjected herself to that moment in the classroom for nothing. "Since we're both spending the summer cooped up in this house, I have a feeling we're going to get very sick of each other, so we should enjoy this last night of being free and still loving each other."

Langston tried not to smirk and give it away that she sincerely doubted Starr was going to be spending much time at the house this summer.

"Oh, you should probably grab your toothbrush and a change of clothes," she noted casually. "Since I have to cover for me and Markko being together the entire night, I left a note for your mom and Dorian saying that we're going to Erin's for a sleepover, and I guess you're going to have to actually go. I hope that's okay, I probably should have asked first."

"That's fine," Starr assured her. Though she wouldn't consider any of the girls in school genuinely her friends, Erin was one of the few girls she was at least friend_ly_ with, and she liked her well enough; and Langston had covered for her more than enough times, she owed her this one.

If it weren't for the fact that she was only fooling Starr for her own good, Langston _might_ have started to feel a tad bit guilty at this point.

Starr gathered her things and Langston ushered her to the car, overdoing it just a tad as she all but forced Starr to exit the house like a spy, diving around corners and practically crawling on the floor.

Once they got driving, Langston instantly began rambling on about how she was planning on telling Markko about everything that'd happened that day, what she was going to do about Lola and how she was going to handle living with her after this, and anything else she could think of that kept Starr distracted and from paying too much attention to where Langston was driving. _Ha_, and Cole thought this was too simple to work.

"So, like, if Ray and Dorian decide to really freak me out and get married, what does that make Lola to me? She's my _cousin_ and my sister?"

"You just missed your turn," Starr interrupted her, frowning.

"And Ray is my uncle _and_ my step-father?" Langston pressed on as though she hadn't heard her.

"Langston, hello? We're picking up Markko, right? That was-""

"How funny would it be to walk around, telling people my uncle is marrying my mom? Can you imagine their faces? You and I could like-"

"Langston!" Starr cut her off nervously- Langston avoiding things was never a good sign. "We're picking up Markko, _right?_"

"Of course!"

"Then why did you just pass up the turn and ignore me _telling you_ we passed the turn?"

"I…didn't hear you."

"Uh-huh. Well, you can turn around now."

"Um, I'm gonna go a different way," Langston muttered. Well, crap, she had officially lost control of the situation.

"Langston, what are you doing?" Starr snapped. "And don't you even tell me nothing, I'm not going to fall for that, you're being too weird. If we're not going to get Markko, then where…" Starr slowly trailed off, carefully looking out the window to see what direction they were headed, and then gasped, her hands flying to her mouth as her head whipped back around to Langston, pure panic in her eyes. "_Langston!_" she shrieked. "Please tell me we are _not_ driving to angel square!"

"Are you gonna get even madder if I lie to you?"

"You are not doing what I think you're doing right now," Starr hissed.

"Well, see, you think I'm doing something stupid, and I'm _really_ doing something great that you'll thank me for later, so that's true!"

"Langston, what are you doing?! Why would you do something like this? Why are you dragging me off to see Schuyler after everything that's happened? I can't take this, I _can't!_ I can't deal with getting rejected all over again, I can't deal with seeing him with Stacy and having them both tell me to leave and seeing that he hates me for fighting with her, I just…I cannot handle this," Starr ranted frantically, already in tears, the now familiar pain in her heart growing so intense that Starr felt like she just wanted to dig into her chest and rip it out already.

"Hey, Starr," Langston began, her voice quiet and serious. "This is me, remember? I am your best friend, I love you- do you honestly think I would put you in a situation where you were going to get hurt? Do you think I would do anything but what's best for you?"

"Not intentionally!" Starr cried. "But for some reason, you still have hope for me and Schuyler, you think it can be fixed or something, that this is something fixable, and it's _not_, you can't _fix_ the fact that he doesn't want me but apparently that's what you're trying to do, which is not okay, and you need to turn the car around now!"

"Okay, I wanted to save it all for him to tell you, but you look like you're about to fling yourself out of a moving vehicle, so I guess I don't really have a choice; Schuyler loves you, Starr. No, shh, don't argue with me!" she ordered when Starr shook her head and began to protest. "I'm sure you're going to freak over this, but look, Cole and I could not take seeing Schuyler being so stupid and you being so miserable anymore, so when Dickinson let me and Lola go, he and I got together and agreed to go confront Schuyler."

"You _what?!_"

"Look, Cole and I both knew he didn't mean anything he said to you, that this not wanting you crap and being with Stacy was all an act, and- what did I just say about shushing?!- and we were _right_, he admitted that, Starr!" Starr, who had been about to argue, instantly fell silent in surprise, her watery eyes filled with confusion.

"He…what?"

"It was like pulling teeth, believe me, but after we made it clear to Schuyler that you're miserable and much worse off without him-"

"Oh, God, you what?" Starr groaned in disbelief, digging her fingers into her hair.

"He realized that he'd made a mistake._He admitted_ that he basically panicked after what Zach did to you and blamed himself, and that once again, just like earlier this year when he lied and said you couldn't even be friends because you cause too many problems for him, he made up a bunch of crap because he thought he was protecting you. He flat out _said_ this was just a charade and that pushing you away felt like he was ripping his heart out. He went on this big rant about how horrible he is and how much he sucks and isn't good enough for you, blah blah blah, but Cole and I talked some sense into him, and he gets now that his opinion of whether or not he's good enough for you doesn't matter, only yours does, and we explained to him all the ways he's good for you and why you guys belong together, and he gets it, so he's done being a dumbass- finally," Langston finished her ramble, took a deep breath, then flashed Starr a grin. "So, see, this is a good thing. You can express your gratitude in the form of a Starbucks gift card."

To Langston's surprise, there was no response from her friend; she'd expecting Starr to either give in or freak out and fight her even worse at this point- silence had not been anticipated. Finally, she took her eyes off the road long enough to check out Starr's reaction, and Langston felt a pang in her chest at the sight of Starr hunched over in her seat, digging at her wrists as she stared at the floor with heavy eyes; she was obviously seriously listening and contemplating what Langston had told her, but was too terrified to let herself get her hopes up.

"He could have just been saying what you two wanted to hear to get you off his back," Starr suggested quietly a moment later, right hand still at her left wrist.

"You're going to, like, slit your wrist with your fingernails if you don't stop it, and, no offense Starr, but that's stupid. If he just wanted us off his back, he wouldn't say something that would give us all hope and make us try even harder."

"But if he-"

"Okay, Starr, once again, I love you, but if you start going out of your way to come up with insane theories just to make yourself even more miserable, I swear to God _I'm_ going to _shove_ you out of a moving vehicle, because that's annoying as hell, and you and Schuyler have pissed me off way too much with your insistence upon being stupid recently, I've got a short fuse right now. How about you just mull this over silently until we get there, and you two can talk about everything and really have it out like the mature adult couple you're supposed to be?" Langston snapped in frustration, gripping the steering wheel tightly.

Starr gazed at her in wide-eyed surprise; Langston usually spoke to other people like that on her behalf, she didn't snap at _her_ like that…so for her to do it now must have meant that she just might have a point. Starr took a deep breath, silently replaying everything Langston told her, her head admitting it made sense but her heart too scared to have any hope.

They drove to the ASM in silence (other than the sound of Starr nearly hyperventilating the closer they got), and finally, Langston breathed a sigh of relief as she parked, unable to believe she'd actually gotten Starr here.

"Okay, here we are! I'm just gonna make sure you get upstairs, then-"

"I can't do this, Langston!" Starr blurted out.

"Do _what?_ You don't even know what's going to happen."

"_Exactly!_"

"Good things are what's going to happen, okay? I promise, you are about to be reunited with the man you love," Langston reassured her, exiting the car.

She walked to Starr's side, and all but dragged her friend, who was on the verge of a heart attack, out of her seat. Starr froze and Langston sighed, giving her a firm push. Starr reluctantly shuffled along until they were finally in the lobby, which was thankfully vacant right now- the last thing Starr, already so anxious and frazzled, needed right now was one of Roxy's long, rambling speeches.

"Does he know I'm coming here, Langston? What if he just thought-"

"_Yes_, he knows. Oh, hey, look at that," she suddenly noted, grinning as she noticed the pile of crap by the desk- apparently, Schuyler was handling this break-up much like she would.

"Look at wh…what is Stacy's stuff doing down here?" Starr asked slowly in confusion.

"Schuyler was pissed when Cole and I told him what Stacy did to you, he said he was going to break-up with her as soon as we left. Apparently, he doesn't even want to see her long enough just to give her her stuff." Starr was once again silent from shock as Langston guided her up the stairs, and Langston couldn't resist her next comment. "Now, Starr, remember, I already got Erin to cover for us, the 'rents think we're spending the night at her place, so if things get into bow chicka bow wow territory, that's fine, go with it."

"Oh my God, Langston! I'm still not convinced that he's not just going to tell me to get the hell out, I really doubt we're getting into _that_ kind of territory."

"Well, just remember that you do have to spend the night somewhere, unless you're going to rob me of my last night with Markko," Langston reminded her, smiling and batting her eyes hopefully. Starr sighed.

"I'm sure I'll be spending the night at Erin's," she snapped.

"We'll see."

They finally reached Schuyler's door, and before Starr could turn and bolt, as she looked like she wanted to, Langston gripped her arm tightly and gave a short knock at the door. Schuyler opened it within seconds, obviously having been waiting on pins and needles for Starr's arrival, and Langston promptly shoved Starr through the doorway and directly into him; Schuyler caught her as the both stumbled back and they stared at her in disbelief.

"Langston," Schuyler sighed.

"Hey, I said I'd handle it- handled! You crazy kids have fun; see you tomorrow, Starr!"

Langston turned and walked away without another word, grinning broadly as she pulled the door shut behind her and left Starr and Schuyler alone in the tense silence of the room.

Starr quickly scrambled away from Schuyler, blushing, as she took a deep breath, her heart beating so violently that it felt like it was about to burst from her chest. The room was still quiet, with there so much needing to be said that neither could figure out _where_ to begin, and finally, Starr sighed in frustration, unable to take this.

"Schuyler, I'm really sorry Cole and Langston bothered you, I'll make sure it doesn't happen again and I'll just-"

"Wait," Schuyler said quickly, gently grabbing Starr's arm as she started to move to the door. She froze, inhaling sharply, and looked up at him hopefully.

"Schuyler, it's okay, you don't have to humor me, I'm fine."

"I don't _want_ you to go, Starr, please," he begged, voice quiet in it's intensity. "I have…a lot I need to explain to you."

"Explain?" she prompted as her heart skipped a beat, dropping her bag on the floor and moving further into the apartment to show she wasn't leaving as long as he wanted her there. Schuyler took a deep breath.

"Did, uh, Langston explain to you everything that happened…everything I said?" he asked nervously.

"Some of it," she answered softly, her heart now leaping to her throat over the idea that Langston may have been right after-all. Apparently it was time to get some answers. "She, um…she said you've been lying to me, about…not wanting me," she finished in a rush, giving a quick, small laugh, like she thought that was ridiculous. Hopefully, that way, if Langston had gotten it all wrong they could just brush this off and he wouldn't feel the need to give some 'letting her down gently' speech. "Is that…true?" she asked, holding her breath the second the question was out.

Schuyler, who had been nervously fidgeting and looking everywhere but directly at her, just as she'd been doing with him, finally stopped and looked her directly in the eyes, gazing at her intently; something about his expression left Starr breathless, and convinced that she could not have torn her eyes away from his even if she wanted to.

"Yes," he answered firmly.

For a second, Starr simply froze in utter shock as her chest tightened painfully, her throat feeling like it was closing up until she remembered that she still hadn't taken a breath. Starr forced herself to breathe, feeling something in her stomach twist; the rush of emotions that one word had brought on was overwhelming, but to her surprise, the one she was feeling the strongest was anger.

"You lied?" she managed to choke out after what felt like an eternity, during which Schuyler had watched her uncertainly, worried. "When you told me you didn't really love me, that you didn't want me, you _lied_?"

"Yes," he breathed, sounding shamed by this, his shoulders sagging. "Starr, I-"

Starr held up her hand to stop him- this was already too much to process, she couldn't have him adding more on yet. She abruptly spun on her heel, starting to pace the short length of the room as her head spun, making her feel dizzy.

"I don't understand. _Why?_" she demanded hotly, wheeling around to face him again. All those miserable nights spent crying herself to sleep, thinking the only guy she was ever going to love couldn't care less about her, had been for _nothing?_ She'd gone through this agony for no reason? "Why would you lie? Why did you break-up with me in the first place? How could you…"

Much to Starr's frustration, her voice suddenly broke and she quickly fell silent, taking a shaky breath as tears pierced her eyes. Schuyler looked so hurt by seeing physical proof of how much pain he'd caused her that you'd think he just had the wind knocked out of him, and his disgust with himself grew.

"Starr," Schuyler murmured softly, starting to move towards her; he'd never been able to stay away from her when she was in pain, he couldn't control it.

"Don't," she snapped quickly, skittering away from him, causing Schuyler to flinch. She needed to think right now, and being near him was just…too intoxicating, it messed with her senses too much- it was why she'd kissed him in the middle of school with the rest of the student body and most of the staff only _feet_ away from them in the gym, for God's sake. She needed to keep her distance until this was sorted out. "Schuyler, why did you do that to me?" she demanded.

"I was trying to protect you, Starr," he answered quietly, Langston and Cole having made him realize how insanely stupid his reasoning was. Starr's look of disbelief seemed to prove she felt similarly.

"What the hell are you talking about?" she demanded in confusion. He'd broken her heart to _protect_ her? In what bizarro world did that make sense?

"I don't…" Schuyler trailed off, struggling to find a way to explain it, and laughed darkly. "God, and this made so much sense to me at the time. It was like one disaster after another kept happening, and everything piling up like that just _got_ to me. You know I had…reservations from the start, feeling like I was holding you back or taking advantage of you-" Starr opened her mouth to protest, and Schuyler quickly continued.

"And I get _now_ how wrong I was, but that was how I felt at the time. That night with Zach was when it all blew up and I freaked. You wouldn't have been in that position with him if you weren't trying to protect me, that's just a fact, and I couldn't…I couldn't get past that," he spat, a burning anger towards both himself and Zach Rosen momentarily overwhelming him. "Everytime I saw you, all I could think about was what you'd been through with him thanks to me, how I completely failed to keep you safe, and I couldn't stand it, I couldn't bear being around you knowing what I'd done, especially since you didn't blame me at all. After what you went through because of me, after you saw me completely _snap_ and just lose it and nearly kill Zach, I was sure that the way you looked at me was going to be…different, but it wasn't- you looked at me the same way you always had, with more love and trust than I ever deserved, and it just made me sick with myself."

"Um, wow, sorry for loving you," Starr snapped, crossing her arms defensively. Schuyler started to speak, but Starr impatiently gestured for him to stop again, sighing. "Schuyler, the reason I didn't look at you any different, like I blamed you or resented you or whatever is because it _wasn't your fault._ Cole, Jack and my dad had a lot more to do with me being there than you, and disturbing as this is to think about, Zach was obviously planning on using me for revenge right from the start- he was going to find me one way or another, and the only reason he didn't get what he wanted is because you _did_ save me from him. And, you honestly thought I would have a problem with what you did to Zach? Because, this might just be the dark side of me I inherited from my father talking, but after how he hurt you and Cole and after what he tried to do to me, I feel like he deserved it. I get why you're upset you lost control, but I think that was probably the one situation where it was okay to, and you still stopped yourself the second I said something to you. You didn't make me feel…scared, or like I was at risk of getting hurt because of you or whatever it is you thought I should have felt- _you_ were the one person that made me feel _safe_, you were the only one I wanted anywhere near me after that. That should have brought us _closer_, it shouldn't have torn us apart," Starr said in frustration, shaking her head.

"That wasn't what did it. I still would have hated myself for putting you in that position and I still would have been ashamed of myself for my lack of restraint, but if it had_ just_ been that night with Zach I think I could have worked to get past it and let it go."

"But there was all that stuff leading up to it- like that night with Cole," Starr sighed. She had known right away how Cole's words had affected him, but the drama with her dad and then Zach had kept them from ever being able to talk it out. Schuyler nodded in confirmation.

"I just…I don't know, I just started to think, maybe he's got a point. And that night, I had to _hurt_ you in the process of getting rid of Cole, and I felt like…why is she wasting her time? You were sneaking around with me because I could never be with you publically, that's bad enough, and then I made you _cry_ to keep Cole from finding out about us, and I couldn't see how I could possibly be worth the way I was robbing you of the rest of your life and the pain I was putting you through."

"And then, when you were already having all these doubts, my dad came along," Starr filled in quietly, her eyes heavy; she was desperate to dispute everything Schuyler had just said, but she knew they were nowhere done with this explanation and she couldn't jump in yet.

"Yeah; and it wasn't anything he did to me that night that was the problem, because I _meant_ what I said to you, Starr," he said intensely. "Your dad's threats don't bother me- I could not care less about him. There is nothing _he_ could do to _me_ that would make me stay away from you; I love you too much for that, you're more than worth anything he could put me through."

Starr bowed her head, taking a quiet breath as tears flooded her eyes, a wave of powerful relief crashing into her- he loved her. She took a moment to process that, let it truly sink it; he'd been lying when he claimed he didn't, he still loved her- the words were like music to her ears. She still needed answers, she was still angry, but that painful, aching feeling that she'd been suffering through for so long was instantly erased- he _loved_ her after-all, just as she loved him, and that was all she really needed to know.

"But…what he could do to _you_ is a different story," Schuyler sighed darkly, shaking his head as he clenched his fists with barely concealed anger.

"My dad talks a good game, Schuyler, but he wouldn't actually hurt me or anything," Starr told him. God, it was so freaking depressing that she had to reassure people of that.

"Maybe not directly. But if he were to tell the school board about us and the news got out, do you know what people would think about you? A young girl who hooks up with a grown man, her _teacher_- I _know_ that's not what we are," he cut her off before she could even get the words out. "Believe me, Starr, I know, but nobody else will, that's how they'll see it, and a girl who hooks up with her teacher is a _loser_, at _best._"

"I'm assuming Langston already pointed out that people think even less flattering things about girls who get pregnant when they're sixteen?" Starr asked quietly. Schuyler nodded stiffly.

"That wasn't even the end of it. Look, I'll be blunt, I think your father is an evil son of a bitch who has no business being in your life- he doesn't deserve to be- but I know that even when you wish you didn't, you love him, and I didn't want to be the reason you lost him forever, especially when it seemed like it was going to happen with the rest of your family too. I'm not worth losing that much," he scoffed.

"That's up to me to decide!" Starr snapped before she could help herself. "Why do you get to decide that I'm worth losing your job and reputation but I can't decide that you're worth letting go of my psychotic father if he _forces_ me to?"

"I was wrong- I was an ass," he added bluntly. "Part of me felt like it wasn't right to let you make those decisions because you're only seventeen, but I was just being an idiot. I was being a coward, actually," he corrected himself with a heavy sigh. Starr furrowed her brow.

"A coward? What do you mean?"

"I don't think I even realized this until Cole said it, which kills me," he muttered. "I think it's not even so much that I _didn't_ believe you could make these choices and love me the same way I loved you because of your age, it's more that I was…scared to," he finished so quietly that Starr had to strain to hear. Her eyes softened and she unconsciously took a few steps closer to him, feeling like there was some pull between them she couldn't fight. "I guess everything Cole and your dad said did get to me, and there was this small part of me that was worried you were going to wake up one day and decide this was a phase, and resent me for holding you back."

"And that stupid lie I told you about realizing you _were_ a phase, that you were just someone I turned to when I was lonely and desperate and that I would have felt the same about anyone who'd been in your position didn't help at all, did it?" Starr realized, cradling her head in frustration- they had _both_ handled this like complete dumbasses. "I'm sorry, Schuyler, I still can't believe I said those things to you."

"You're apologizing to me?" Schuyler asked in disbelief, shaking his head. "God, no, Starr- after everything I put you through, that was the least of what I deserved."

"But the difference is, you honestly believed you were protecting me, while I just wanted to hurt you as badly as possible," Starr admitted, shame faced. "I mean, I got upset thinking about how I was sure it hadn't affected you at all since you just didn't care about me- I was _upset_ over the idea that I _didn't_ hurt you."

"It affected me," he assured her darkly, wincing even now just at the memory. "Trust me."

"I'm sorry," Starr softly told him once again.

"Please don't be," he begged.

The room fell silent once again as Starr struggled to really take in all the information she'd just received. She began to pace again as Schuyler watched her anxiously, waiting for her to take the next step.

"So everything that happened, everything you said and did was really just one big lie? You were just trying to push me away?" she demanded, still so scared to trust that the rug wouldn't be yanked out from under her again that she needed constant reassurance.

"Yes, all of it," Schuyler answered roughly, his shoulders slumping. Starr felt another surprising flash of irritation.

"Just like, punch me in the face next time, Schuy, okay?" she snapped. "It would have the same desired result but hurt _so_ much less."

"Starr, I'm _so_ sorry, I never wanted to-"

"I _know_ you're sorry, okay? You don't have to tell me, I can see it, that's not the issue. It's just that you've done this to me twice, Schuyler, _twice_- and I cannot take a third time, I _can't_," she informed him seriously, the warning in her tone clear. Schuyler nodded in understanding, bowing his head, and Starr released a breath, and along with it, her anger. She walked to the bed and nervously sat on the edge. "I don't need you trying to protect me from yourself, Schuyler, you're the last person I need protection from, and I don't understand why you think differently."

"Starr…" Schuyler began slowly, taking a deep breath. He wandered to the bed as well and sat beside her cautiously, not sure if she was okay with him getting close yet. She didn't move away, and Schuyler continued. "You remember that day in the graveyard, when I told you about the nightmares I would have, that made me wake up craving a hit for just a second?"

"Of course," she said softly.

"I never told you what they were about. A lot were about my mom, her suicide, memories of my drug use, things I almost did or actually did while high, the ways I hurt people and let them down…but they were mostly about you," he whispered roughly, bracing himself. He hated thinking about this.

"Me?" she asked with wide, startled eyes. "Like what?"

"Mostly all the ways you could have been hurt because of me. Thinking about what could have happened if I hadn't been there the day Cole got sent to rehab, how far he would have gone. If I had left after you kissed me and he'd gotten a chance to act on the anger he showed when you defended me. If he'd hung around a little longer and you left with him after I walked away from you, and you'd been in Matthew's position. What your dad could do if he lost his temper when he found out about us. Certain people from my past who could come back and see you as a really good way to hurt me for the things I did. I could go on _and on_ about all the different scenarios I thought of where you could have been hurt because of me. And that's exactly what happened," he seethed, eyes burning with self-hatred. "Zach hurt you because of me-"

"Didn't I just explain that's not what happened?" Starr asked, her tone no longer irritated, but gentle; she now wished she had asked him about these nightmares the first time he mentioned them.

"I can see your point now, but that doesn't change how I felt. I _knew_ something like that would happen, but I still didn't put a stop to us before it could because I'm a selfish son of a bitch and I love you, and apparently, that overruled everything," he said bitterly. "I think letting you go was my way of trying to make things right, make sure I never let that happen again."

"Oh, Schuyler," Starr murmured, greatly pained that he felt this way. She reflexively grabbed his hand without thinking about it, and Schuyler held hers tightly. Starr felt a rush of pleasant warmth spread throughout her in response to his touch. "Look, there's something you need to understand here; I have been kidnapped more than once before. I've been through incidents like the one with Zach before," she said that one quietly, flinching as she recalled Cole shoving her on the bed, screaming at her for being a tease, calling her an uptight little bitch. It was still hard to believe that day hadn't been some horrible nightmare- she could not even reconcile those memories with the Cole she knew. Starr instantly continued before Schuyler could respond to that. "I've been held at gunpoint before. I've had someone try to kill me before, when I was just a little girl." She glanced at Schuyler to gauge his reaction, and saw his jaw was practically on the floor as he stared at her in silent shock, with stunned, angry eyes, and she nervously continued. "I know that's not exactly reassuring, but the point I'm trying to make here is that my life has _always_ been this way, and as long as I'm a Manning and continue to be a natural danger magnet, it's always _going_ to be. You didn't bring this danger into my life, and you leaving me doesn't take it away- just the opposite, actually.

"Cole didn't get a chance to snap and do something he'd regret the night of the dance because even though you should have left right away, before anyone else on the staff came along, even though that's all it would have taken to save your job, you _chose_ to stay and make sure Cole couldn't do anything. That day Cole freaked out by the lockers, you protected me, and you comforted me, even though if Dickinson had been the one to find us all, that would have been it for your career. When my dad came here ready to literally snap your neck, you were a thousand times more worried about me than yourself- you almost punched him just for telling me to shut up," she recalled, laughing slightly. "And the night of the Zach incident, you kept me safe from him up until your skull was nearly busted open, and then, even with a concussion, you were the one who figured out how to get into the room, and _you_ rescued me from him. You have no reason to feel guilty about a thing, because I _haven't_ been hurt since you came along, because you've always been there to save me.

"And that's without even getting into the emotional side of it- you saved me from turning into a complete mess like Cole did when we thought our baby was dead, just by being there for me. Maybe it's hard for you to understand why, but you've made me happier than I have _ever_ been, Schuyler. I was expecting to be a wreck the night of the Zach incident, but I was perfectly fine because you were with me. You have to understand that, Schuyler- I don't care what anyone says, the truth is that you're _good for me._ You might not be able to see that, because it's apparently impossible for you to see yourself in a good light, which breaks my heart, but everything I just said is solid _proof_ of that, so don't even bother trying to argue."

He didn't argue…or, say anything at all; he just sat there stiffly, staring at the carpet, still holding her hand in a death grip. Starr knew he was probably just in the same place she'd been in earlier, struggling to process an overflow of information you hadn't been expecting, but just waiting in silence made her too nervous.

"Schuyler?" she prompted anxiously. "What are you thinking?"

"After hearing everything you've been through, and the fact that you expect things like that to keep happening?" he began, sounding slightly dazed. "That I want to lock you in this room and never let you leave."

"I don't think I'd complain," Starr said lightly with a small smile, only partly joking. The corners of Schuyler's lips tugged upwards slightly. "I just want to know if you understand now, Schuy," she said softly.

"I do," he reassured her, gazing at her seriously as he brushed his thumb across her fingers. Starr felt a powerful wave of relief to know she'd actually gotten through to him. "It's not easy to just change the way I've been thinking for so long, but I know you're right. I sure as hell know that Cole would not have convinced me to work things out with you if you weren't right," he chuckled slightly. "And if I'm the guy you want, then I think it's time I quit being a moron and fighting that and just be happy about it."

Starr lit up with a brilliant grin; she could not believe how quickly she'd gone from feeling completely hopeless and miserable to this.

"Hey, Starr," Schuyler began a second later, before Starr could say any of the things she was thinking of, his voice rough and quiet. Starr glanced at him curiously. Schuyler quickly released her hand before continuing, digging his nails into his palms till he nearly drew blood. "What did you mean you've been through incidents like the one with Zach before?" he asked tightly, careful to keep his tone even and calm, though Starr could hear a quiet note of rage behind it. She winced, inhaling sharply; she'd really been hoping he wouldn't pick up too much on that particular comment.

"I, um…don't think that's really important right now," she finally said, unable to figure out any other way to dodge that one. Schuyler slowly exhaled and just nodded.

"You'll tell me someday?" he asked gently.

"Yeah," Starr replied. Uh, yeah, sure- she'd tell Schuyler the day she decided she wanted Cole to be killed. "So, um…you're saying you and I will still be together when this someday comes?" she asked leadingly, flashing him a hopeful smile. Schuyler returned it, and Starr's heart jumped happily- that smile was all she'd wanted to see.

"If you'll have me. I know how badly I screwed up, Starr; I wanted to protect you, but all I did was hurt you, and I cannot even begin to tell you how sorry I-"

"You don't have," she cut him off, shaking her head. "I told you already, I know you're sorry, and I get why you did it, so I don't need an apology. I just need you to trust me, Schuyler," she pleaded. "And that includes trusting my judgment, that I know what and _who_ is best for me. I want us to be together more than I have ever wanted anything, but I don't want to have to worry that the whole time we are, you're secretly thinking I should be somewhere else, that it's wrong."

"That's not going to happen," Schuyler instantly promised her, his voice firm, and filled with desperation to make her believe him. "If there's one thing this mess made me realize, it's that you and I are _not_ better off apart. I can't…I cannot even _function_ without you, Starr. I could barely make it through these last few days, and I know now that it was the same for you- I have no intentions of ever putting either of us through this hell, and for no good reason, ever again."

"You couldn't function? You seemed fine to me," Starr muttered; voicing one of the things about this breakup that had hurt her the most.

"Only because, unfortunately, I'm a great liar- considering my past, that's really no surprise. It was all just part of the act, Starr," he sighed. "I thought it would be easier for you to move on if you thought I already had, so I made sure you thought I was perfectly okay without you, when I wasn't at all. Without you, Starr, it felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. You think I relapsed and got drunk because I was fine?"

"That's why you thought it was so hysterical when I asked if you were there because you had a fight with Stacy," Starr realized, understanding dawning in her eyes. "Oh my God, Langston was right, she is _so_ gonna rub that in my face. I cannot believe I was so obliv…wait," she suddenly said, furrowing her brow and shooting Schuyler a strange look. She abruptly jumped to her feet and took several steps away from him.

"Starr, what's wrong?" Schuyler asked in confusion, also standing.

"_Stacy_ is what's wrong. Aren't you with her?" she demanded hotly. She had never received an explanation for that part. Schuyler slowly shut his eyes, appearing crestfallen; _damn it_, he was really a stupid asshole. "I thought you _loved_ her, Schuyler- 'the heart wants what it wants?'"

"You were never supposed to hear that, Starr."

"Oh, okay, that makes it better!" she spluttered. "I'm really confused now, Schuyler. How could you say that to her and be so happy with her but-"

"I wasn't _happy_ with Stacy!" Schuyler exploded. "Even if I hadn't felt like I was slowly dying because I lost you, I still wouldn't have been- being happy in Stacy's presence isn't even possible for me, all she is is a reminder of a horrible past that I regret," he spat. Starr gazed at him with wide eyes, startled.

"Then why were you…"

"She was just yet another part of the act, Starr," he sighed. "I didn't think I could resist you and stay away from you for long if I didn't have somebody holding me back- I was using Stacy to keep myself away from you, just like she was using me as a substitute for Rex. Everything I said to her at the hospital was total bullshit. _I love you_, Starr, and frankly, I couldn't care less about Stacy. I'm just sorry that I hurt you so badly with her; all I meant to do was make it easier for you to forget about me."

"So…you _did_ break up with her?" she asked meekly for confirmation.

"I don't just have her stuff piled by the desk for storage," he said with a nod. Starr giggled slightly, until her eyes fell across the bed, and it instantly died down. She fidgeted uncomfortably, working up the nerve for her next question.

"You didn't…sleep with her, did you?" she muttered with downcast eyes, digging at her wrists.

"Oh my God, _no!_" Schuyler answered without hesitation, looking sickened just by the thought of it. "I barely kissed her, and even that was a struggle."

"Good," Starr scoffed before she could help herself, scowling at just the thought of Stacy.

"Langston told me what Stacy did to you this morning," Schuyler said quietly. Starr sighed, reluctant to discuss this.

"It wasn't really that big of a deal, Schuyler."

"Like hell it wasn't," he snapped. "Starr, what she did was not even remotely-"

"Seriously, Schuy, I would rather just forget it altogether. You dumped her, I slapped her, so she already got what she had coming, and I don't want to waste anymore time on her."

"Wait, you what?" Schuyler interjected, suddenly grinning in amusement.

"Langston didn't tell you that part?" Starr asked slowly. Still grinning, Schuyler shook his head. "Yeeeeah, um, I kind of freaked out when she started rubbing it in that you supposedly loved her and not me, and I, um, slapped her."

Schuyler burst out laughing, almost doubling over in hysterics, and Starr now had to grin herself, recalling how worried she'd been that he would be _mad._

"That's what you meant when you said you got violent twice in one day," Schuyler choked out, still cracking up. Starr blushed.

"Yeah- that's why I freaked out and ran off too. I started thinking about how sure I was that you were going to take her side over mine and I just got really flustered and upset," she sighed. Schuyler instantly grew serious, no trace of laughter on his face.

"That would never happen, Starr," he assured her.

"What, that you wouldn't have believed Stacy over me?"

"I wouldn't believe anyone over you, Starr," he promised. "I will _always_ trust you more than anyone, you never have to worry about that."

Starr smiled softly, overjoyed just to know that things were how they were supposed to be again; Schuyler trusted her, he loved her, he wanted to be with her- all was right again.

"Hey, Starr," Schuyler drew her from her thoughts as he quietly spoke her name. There was one more thing Langston had said that Schuyler knew they needed to discuss. "There's one more reason why I did what I did with Stacy- I discussed this with Langston, and she said something that I think you and I need to talk about. I told her that I was so sure you knew I loved you that just breaking up with you couldn't have convinced you otherwise, that I thought you would need to see proof of me moving on to believe it, and Langston said that wasn't the case. She said you believed everything I said right away because…you feel like you're not good enough for me, that me not wanting you makes sense to you. Is that true?" he asked quietly.

Starr swallowed roughly, taking a deep breath as she protectively crossed her arms over herself, gazing at the floor in discomfort. Schuyler watched her patiently, his eyes pained as he could already sense the answer.

"I don't know. Yeah, I guess," she sighed.

"Starr," Schuyler murmured earnestly. Unable to stand this distance any longer, he quickly closed the few steps that were between them. "Why would you ever, _ever_ think that?"

"I don't know, Schuyler!" she repeated in a cry, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "I never really understood why you would fall for some plain, ordinary girl like me. And I get _now_ that she's this evil bitch who reminds you of all the bad aspects of your past, but at the time it just felt like, 'Oh, here's Stacy!" Starr chirped, working herself up into a good ramble. "And she's gorgeous and experienced and you used to pine for her and you only lost her because of drugs, not because you didn't want her anymore, and she knows your history better than I can because she lived it with you, and-"

Starr was suddenly cut off as Schuyler seized her by the shoulders, yanked her into his arms, and brought his lips crashing down to hers. He kissed her fervidly, slowly, his hands tangling in her hair as Starr melted into his familiar embrace, eagerly responding to his kiss with everything she had in her- it had been far too long since she'd gotten to do this.

When Schuyler finally pulled away, Starr was all but panting for breath as she gazed up at him with starry, dazed eyes, and Schuyler grinned, quickly kissing her forehead.

"Starr? You know how you think it's ridiculous that I can't understand why you'd fall for a worthless former drug addict? This is like that. I opened my eyes to who Stacy really was and stopped pining for her the moment I fell in love- for the first time in my life. And I didn't fall for a plain, ordinary girl- I fell for the smartest, most beautiful girl I have ever met, who's funny, and brave, and too selfless for her own good, and who gets me in a way I never believed anyone could."

Starr' s grin was so powerful that it was starting to make her cheeks ache. Not wanting to ruin this moment with insufficient words, Starr simply wound her arms around Schuyler's waist and hugged him tightly, not wanting to waste one more moment by spending it out of his arms.

"You know," she began after several minutes of silence and peace. "I cannot believe the two people were once more against this relationship than anyone are the ones that made this happen. I guess I really owe Langston and Cole for getting through to you."

"You did that, actually," Schuyler told her.

"Huh?"

"Langston, uh, showed me your letter."

"Oh my God, she what?" Starr groaned, pulling back slightly, appearing mortified. "You were never supposed to see that. I'm sure it seemed really over the top and creepy, but you have to remember, I-"

Schuyler once again cut her off as he cupped her chin in his hands and kissed her softly once more.

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about," he told her, barely pulling away from her. "The letter is what woke me up because it made me realize you were feeling every single thing I was, and that I was just being an idiot."

"Yeah, you were," she teased, grinning. "But I made a few not so smart moves myself. It's okay, we can be stupid together."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

Starr sighed in contentment, dropping her head to his chest once more and peacefully listening to the sound of his heartbeat just as she had the night of the Zach incident when he'd stayed with her, just as she had every night she'd stayed with him before then; it was such a small, simple thing, but she'd missed it just as powerfully as she had everything else about him. This, right here, felt like home.

"You love me?" Starr quietly asked again a minute later, desperately needing to be reassured of that after how convinced his lies had had her.

"I love you," Schuyler said softly into her ear, rubbing light circles against her back. Starr shut her eyes for a moment, just basking in the joy those words brought her.

"And you want me?"

Schuyler's fingers now lightly trailed along her spine until he reached the bottom of her shirt and his hand slipped under the thin material, his fingers brushing against her bare skin, causing Starr to shiver. Schuyler pulled back just enough so they were face to face now, and lightly kissed her forehead, the tip of her nose, her cheeks, before finally bringing his lips near hers, hovering only centimeters away, so close that they could share breath; Starr's heart pounded in anticipation, her knees feeling like jelly.

"I want you," he murmured, his voice husky with desire.

And with those words, Starr could not contain how badly she wanted him too for a moment longer and threw her arms around his neck, crushing her lips to his in a fiery kiss. Schuyler instantly kissed her back passionately, pulling her body flush to his, and Starr moaned at the contact, going weak in the knees. She stumbled back, tugging him along with her as their lips did not leave each others for a single second, until the back of her knees hit the bed and she went tumbling down, pulling him with her. Schuyler carefully held himself up one hand, so lost in the moment he barely seemed to realize where they were. As his tongue brushed hers, Starr grew desperate for more and grabbed the bottom of his shirt, impatiently yanking it up.

Schuyler pulled away to toss the shirt over his head, and Starr took only a moment to breathe, her eyes shamelessly scanning his body, before she moved her hand to the back of his head and started to pull him back down to her. The break in their kiss, however, seemed to have allowed Schuyler a moment to get his senses back, and he stopped her.

"Starr, wait," he breathed. "Are you sure about this?" Starr couldn't help herself and laughed slightly, her breathing still ragged.

"You actually have to ask? Schuyler, I am more sure about this than I have ever been of anything. I love you."

"I love you too."

"I know that, and…I don't want you to tell me anymore, I just want you to show me."

Schuyler just cupped her cheek, gazing at her tenderly for a moment, then brought his lips back down to hers, as he proceeded to spend the rest of the night showing Starr exactly how much he loved her.


	21. Chapter 21

The next morning, once she had finally managed to tear herself away from Schuyler after an admittedly nauseating round of 'I love you more' 'No, I love you more' and making love one more time, Starr was walking up the pathway to her house, practically bouncing with every step she took, but suddenly slowed down as she heard two familiar voices near the door.

"I don't want to leave you, like, ever. But I don't think I can deal if Dorian starts trying to get the details. How do I say, it was amazing, mad-crazy great?"

"Just like that."

Starr quickly cleared her throat as loudly as possible when she heard the sounds of kissing, warning them about her presence, and they'd already pulled apart by the time she walked up. Markko looked slightly mortified to realize Starr had just overheard them, but Langston was still smiling shamelessly.

"Hey, Starr," she greeted her, keeping her arms wound around Markko's neck. "So, was I right, or was I right?"

"You were right," Starr laughed happily.

Langston managed to tear her eyes away from Markko for just a moment, and she glanced to Starr with a very clear, questioning look. Starr couldn't have helped herself even if she wanted to and grinned brightly, nodding. Langston squealed slightly, bouncing on the balls of her feet, and Starr laughed again- Markko watched the exchange in complete confusion.

"Am I missing something?"

"It's a girl thing, sweetie. I'll see you inside in two minutes, Starr, and you better be ready to spill!" Langston ordered.

"Hey, you too!" Starr said with another wide smile, darting around them and opening the door to the house as Markko gaped at Langston.

"Wait, she knows?!"

"Oh, please, like you didn't tell Cole."

Starr giggled as she shut the door behind her, drowning them out, and felt a quick rush of relief that nobody else seemed to be downstairs yet- she needed to get her giddiness out with Langston first, no way her mom would believe she'd just been with Erin last night if she walked in now and saw her practically glowing.

Langston stepped inside several minutes later, and wasted no time, promptly tossing her bag on the floor and rushing over to her best friend's side, both girls already grinning like idiots.

"Oh my God, you and Schuyler…?"

"And you and Markko…?"

They simultaneously nodded, and there was a moment of silence before both girls squealed loudly, jumping up and down and generally spastically flailing with joy, too happy to care that they looked crazy.

"Tell me about it!" Langston ordered giddily. "I mean, I'm not saying we need to exchange, like details details, because that'd be weird, and I don't want to know that much, but you have to tell me- was it totally amazing?"

Starr pressed her hands to her mouth, but it couldn't hide her smile, and she just nodded eagerly.

"Better than with…?" Langston had to ask out of curiosity.

"Oh my God, yes, so much better," Starr admitted, blushing furiously.

"And he didn't, like, freak in the morning, right? Get all 'Oh no, I slept with a student, I must go flog myself now!' "

"Uh, no," Starr laughed, smiling as she thought about the morning. "I was actually a little worried about that too, but he seemed just as content as I did. Actually, he was worried about me regretting it or feeling weird or something." Langston snorted, and Starr looked amused. "I know, right? But it was really nice, actually- he was so sweet, Langston. You know, um, he woke up before I did, and I realized when I got up that he was watching me sleep," Starr told her quietly, blushing.

"Awww, that is so cute!" Langston cooed, grinning as she nudged her friend. "Does that boy loooove you or what?"

"I know," Starr giggled nervously, pressing her hands to her face. "But, ah, enough about me, your turn. What about you? Did it live up to your fantasy?"

"It kicked my fantasy's ass," Langston laughed. "I have the best boyfriend ever- hey, don't you argue with me, I'm sorry, it's true. It was, um…"

"Wow?" Starr guessed, knowing that was the only accurate word she could think of to describe her night with Schuyler.

"Yeah, it was wow," Langston giggled. "Pretty much the closest thing I could image to perfect- oh, except…" she trailed off, frowning darkly.

"What?" Starr asked in concern. Langston hesitated, wondering if she should just forget about it so as not to taint the happiness of this morning, but eventually decided Starr should know what was going on.

"Except for the fact that Lola poked holes in my condoms," Langston snapped.

"What?" Starr gasped in shock. "How did that even…how?!"

"When Dorian had that big talk with me after Lola called, she…she gave me this like, French condom case, and yes it was already filled, and yes, I wanted to die. I showed it to Markko at school, because it's a French condom case, that's hilarious and creepy all at once, I had to show him; and anyway, I guess Lola saw us. She must have grabbed them from my bag during lunch or gym or when I was the bathroom or something."

"Wait!" Starr cried, looking truly panicked. "Oh my God, so you guys had unprotected-"

"No!" Langston said quickly. "There will be no repeats of the past, don't worry. I don't know how Dorian found out, but somehow she did and she called to warn me. No way we could have used anything given to us by Dorian anyway, you know? That's just weird and gross. Markko had his own condoms," she assured her.

"God, I'm sorry, Lang- I bet you anything I was the inspiration for that idea," Starr sighed, as she unconsciously pressed a hand to her stomach for just a moment.

"Come on, Starr, don't you even apologize for the psycho bitch- this is happy time, remember?"

"Of course, I know, it's just…geez, she is even more insane than I thought."

"Yeah, she…do you realize you're still smiling?"

"I'm sorry, I can't help it," Starr said with another giddy laugh, aware of how ridiculous she must look talking about how evil and crazy Lola was with this grin still plastered to her face.

"Man, did you have a good night or what?" Langston asked, amused.

"Good night…and morning," Starr confessed in a near squeak, biting her lip. Langston's eyes widened in surprise, and then she smirked.

"I should have known- it's always the quiet ones. You're going to turn into a total sex fiend now or something, aren't you?"

Starr burst out laughing and was quickly joined by Langston, and the laughter set off another round of squealing and flailing. The girls were both so caught up that neither even heard the living room doors open or noticed their mothers walking into the room, staring at them in surprise and confusion.

"Starr?" Blair blurted out in confusion; last time she'd seen her daughter, she'd been miserably lying in bed, barely able to talk or eat she was so broken hearted- the complete opposite of how she was acting now.

The two girls whipped around in surprise and looked at their mothers nervously, quickly calming down.

"Oh, hey, mom!" Starr greeted her brightly. "We didn't hear you come in, sorry."

"What's going on?" Blair asked slowly, glancing between them. Starr and Langston exchanged a grin.

"We just had a really fun night at Erin's," Starr laughed, in a manner that was not the least bit convincing.

"Uh-huh," Blair replied flatly, raising an eyebrow. "We'll talk about it later."

Langston glanced to Dorian, knowing full well her mother had to realize she'd been with Markko, but to her surprise, Dorian was still stone faced, and seemed incredibly distracted by something.

"Yes," Dorian sighed. "We have more important things to discuss right now." She paused, glancing around the room, and frowned. "Where's Markko? I assumed he'd be here."

"He's avoiding the house right now in fear of you wanting to have another talk." Blair threw a pointed look to Starr, considering Langston had more or less just admitted she definitely hadn't been with Erin, and Starr just smiled sheepishly. "And by the way, about that? You are so not getting a play by play, so don't even-"

"No, no, this has nothing to do with that. I'm afraid it's far more serious than that," Dorian said grimly.

All that lingering energy and joy quickly disappeared from the girls as they realized something serious had happened. Blair suggested they all take a seat, and they nervously followed the older women back to the living room, anxiously waiting for the news.

"Langston…your cousin Lola is a very, very disturbed girl," Dorian began gravely.

"Is this about last night?" Langston asked slowly, furrowing her brow.

"Yes. The reason I became aware of Lola's plan and was able to warn you is because Lola dropped acid last night."

"Let me guess, supplied by Asher?" Starr spat.

"We're assuming," Blair said with a nod. Starr scoffed, crossing her arms.

"Geez, that's pretty serious. Is she, like, okay?" Langston asked, sighing; she hated that even after everything, she still cared enough to ask.

"I'm afraid not, no. You see, after she told us about the condoms, she…oh, this is going to be so hard to believe."

"Just tell me," Langston pleaded.

"Lola confessed that she killed her own mother."

There was a moment of stunned silence as Starr's jaw dropped and Langston's eyes widened, the two girls exchanging a shocked look.

"That's…way beyond disturbed," Langston choked out, shuddering. Starr supportively squeezed her friend's arm.

"Are you sure it wasn't something she was just saying because of the acid?" Starr asked hopefully.

"No, I'm afraid she was obviously telling the truth," Dorian sighed.

"God, I just thought she was just really bitchy, just another Britney or something- but she killed her own mother?" Langston repeated weakly as she rose to her feet, starting to pace the room. "What's wrong with her?"

"They haven't made a definite diagnosis yet, but it's obvious to me that she has no conception of other people's feelings." Langston flinched, hating that she just might have hit the nail on the head with her 'sociopath' comment.

"I guess not- I mean, she let her dad take the rap for the murder all this time," Starr chimed in, shaking her head.

"Mm-hmm, and then she tried to blame it on her stepmother."

"Lola's going to jail, isn't she?" Langston asked softly.

"At the moment, she's at St. Anne's for evaluation- your Uncle Ray is with her. What's going to happen to her… nobody is sure."

"I just…I can't believe this," Langston spluttered, shaking her head. "I need to go call Markko, he has to hear about this."

Langston spun on her heel, abruptly rushing from the room, and Dorian quickly jumped up to follow her.

"I'm just going to make sure she's alright."

Starr and Blair were left alone in the living room, and Blair shifted closer to Starr on the couch, gently stroking her daughter's hair.

"You okay, sweetie?"

"Yeah, it's just really surprising. Sad, too," she added, her tone downcast. "I feel so bad for Ray."

"I can't even imagine what he must be going through," Blair agreed. Starr nodded, her eyes heavy, and Blair gently nudged her, smiling. "Hey, I'm certainly not saying you should just forget about this, but don't let it overshadow whatever you were so happy about when we walked in, okay? It was really good to see you that way again."

"Trust me, I won't," Starr assured her with a smile; she knew nothing could keep her down for too long right now.

"Can I ask what that was about, by the way?"

"Uh, um…" Starr hesitated, wondering how to tell this story.

"Wait, no, let me guess- you and Schuyler got back together," Blair said confidently.

Starr's head shot up and she looked to her now grinning mother with wide, astonished eyes.

"How did you-"

"When your daughter goes from acting completely miserable and out of it, twenty-four seven, like a zombie, to laughing and dancing in the living room, it's not that hard to figure out. I'm really happy for you sweetie, I'm so glad everything worked out- I was getting really worried there."

"I'm sorry I worried you. And, thank you for being happy for me," she added softly, relieved at least one of her parents could put her feelings first. Blair just smiled.

"Of course. So, I have to ask- was I right? This whole break-up mess was just about him trying to protect you?"

"You got it exactly right," Starr confirmed. "How'd you know?" Blair shrugged.

"I just know how stupid boys can be when they love someone." Starr laughed slightly.

"True that."

"So, remember, I am truly happy for you, but I'm afraid this raises a few questions," Blair began seriously; Starr looked at her nervously. "I'm going to start with- where were you last night?"

"I…was with Erin," Starr said, the grin that appeared on her lips at the thought of last night completely giving her away. "Schuyler and I worked things out, and then I went to her place."

"Yeah, uh-huh, sure- you little liar," Blair scoffed playfully. "Look, I didn't get into this when you first told me about you and Schuyler because you were so heartbroken that it hardly seemed like the time, but I really do want some answers now. Just how many of those nights you claimed to be a sleeping over at a friend's house were you really with Schuyler?"

"Um…like, all but one of them," Starr admitted hesitantly, biting her lip. Blair looked stunned, and took a deep breath.

"Wow. And how many of the outings with Langston and Markko or supposed school activities were covers for spending time with Schuyler?"

"Most of them," she confessed meekly. Blair sighed weakly, cradling her head.

"I really didn't think that was going to be your answer; I just can't believe this. So, you snuck around with Schuyler to the extent of practically living with him, for months, right under my nose?"

"…yes," she answered reluctantly, seeing there was no good way out of that one."

"Wow. Well, that's…actually kind of impressive," Blair muttered. "But it has to stop now. I don't want you getting too serious too fast, especially in this kind of situation."

Starr's instinctual reaction was to argue, fight with her over that comment, but she swallowed the urge.

"Okay," she agreed simply, unable to hide her smile. Blair cocked an eyebrow.

"You just took that as a challenge to be even sneakier, didn't you?"

"Am I my mother's daughter?" Starr asked coyly, batting her eyes innocently. Blair grinned in spite of herself.

"I guess you are. Look, Starr, I'm certainly not trying to tell you that you can't see Schuyler, I'm just asking that you sometimes actually spend the night in your own bed."

"Okay, fair enough."

"Speaking of…I think there's another big issue that we should really discuss," Blair began, taking another deep breath. Starr froze with widened eyes, really hoping that didn't mean what she thought it did. "Look, I won't get mad, but I just want to know how long you and Schuyler have been…"

"Dating?" Starr asked hopefully. Oh, God, please let her say dating.

"No, um, how long you've been…expressing your love."

"Oh, God!" Starr shouted in completely mortification, covering her face with her hands as she jumped to her feet. "I don't wanna talk about this, mom!"

"But we should be able to!" Blair cried, also rising. "I don't know, sometimes I just feel like what happened with you and Cole may not have if you and I had just talked more, and I don't want to make the same mistakes twice. We can talk about something important as this- Dorian and Langston can!"

"We're not Dorian and Langston," Starr argued weakly. Blair sighed.

"Look, Starr, if you're old enough to be dating your teacher and practically living with the man, you are old enough to have this discussion- it won't kill you, I promise. I just…don't like being in the dark where my children are concerned."

"Oh boy, okay," Starr mumbled, feeling sick with nerves; she averted her eyes. "Um, only since…last night."

"Oh. Oh. Okay, well, um, how do you feel about what happened?" Blair asked cautiously, her expression heavy. Starr squirmed.

"Really really good. No regrets or anything, if that's where you're going with this. And before you have to ask, yes, we were safe," she told her uncomfortably.

"And he didn't…pressure you?"

"Uh, no. Trust me, mom, if anyone has done any pressuring throughout this relationship, it's me," Starr muttered, blushing.

"Oh, God," Blair sighed. "And you don't, uh, expect anything now, right?"

"Like…what, exactly?"

"Like, an A on your final assignment, or-"

"What?!" Starr shrieked. "No, of course not! Oh my God, mom! You actually think I'd-"

"No, I don't!" Blair assured her quickly. "But I don't know, I just thought I had to cover all the bases and ask. You're going to have to cut me some slack here, Starr, I have no idea what I'm doing- they don't make pamphlets explaining how to handle your daughter dating her teacher. When your kid dates another kid, you can talk to other parents about that, go off your own experience, get advice from those who came before you, but we're blazing a new trail here. So can we just…promise to be patient with each other while we figure all of this out?"

"Yeah, of course, mom," Starr agreed, softer now. "And you have no idea how much it means to me that you're trying so hard to understand- any other parent- my other parent, actually- would have locked me in my room and called the school board by now, so it means the world to me that you're actually considering me in all of this. And I don't know if this helps to hear, but honestly mom, Schuyler and I pretty much have all of this 'figured out'. We've been together for a long time now and with the exception of this whole horrible 'trying to protect me' thing, it's been…perfect," Starr said, her face lighting up with a smile. She glanced back up and saw her mother watching her with an expression that was somehow sad, wistful, and happy all at once.

"That smile right there is why I could never keep you from him," Blair admitted quietly. "Since you've been with him, you've been happier than I've seen you in…ever, actually," she admitted. "And that's what every parent wants- for their child to be really, truly, completely happy. I guess you know that yourself now, don't you?" Blair asked tenderly. Starr nodded, surprised to feel tears stinging her eyes; she wanted that for Hope so, so much. "And you are that happy now, aren't you?"

"Yes- truly, completely happy mom, I promise."

"Then I almost feel like I should be thanking him. This is probably going to be a little hard for me to adjust to," Blair admitted. "But as long as he continues to make you that happy, I promise we'll make it work."

"Thank you, mom," Starr said sincerely, closing the distance between them and hugging her tightly. Blair smiled, returning the embrace.

"Thank you for being honest with me."

"So, is that all for the uncomfortable questions today?" Starr asked playfully as they pulled apart. "I should probably go check on Langston now."

"Yes, yes, that's all," Blair laughed. "You can go." Starr turned to leave, but Blair quickly remembered something and called after her to stop. "Wait, sorry, there is one more thing. Does Schuyler have plans tonight?"

"Nope, why?"

"Tell him he's coming to dinner."

"What?" Starr cried. "Here?"

"Yes, where else?"

"But…why?!"

"I want to meet him properly, as your boyfriend, and I'm sure the rest of the family does too!"

"But…mom!" Starr spluttered, actually stamping her foot before she could help herself.

"What is Starr freaking out about?" Starr glanced behind her and saw it was Jack who'd voiced the question, apparently having seen her little fit as he walked by.

"We're having Starr's boyfriend over tonight so we can meet him. You want to, right, Jack?"

"Yeah!" he said quickly, looking far too much like he was plotting something for Starr's comfort.

"Mom, we are just so not a 'come to dinner' kind of family! This is going to be so awkward and weird, and we just got back-"

"Starr," Blair interrupted firmly. "This is not a debate. I'm allowing you to date your teacher, for God's sake. I'm not grounding you even though I realize now you've been sneaking around for months, and thus, lying to me. The least the boy can do is come to dinner. Clear?"

"Okay, fine," Starr groaned, nodding. "You guys aren't gonna like, hurt him, right?"

"Wait, you don't want us to?" Jack asked, suddenly looking disappointed. Starr furrowed her brow.

"Jack, why would I want you to hurt my boyfriend?"

"Well, he's the guy who dumped you, right? Isn't he the one who's been making you act all miserable and cry all the time?"

"Oh, Jack," Starr said with a grin, oddly touched that her brother had wanted to beat Schuyler up or something for her. "Yeah, that was him, but he didn't mean to do any of that. Sometimes things like that just happen when you fall in love- I definitely don't want you being rude to him or trying to hurt him because of it, okay?"

Jack stared at her in confusion, then just shook his head as he shrugged.

"I'm never gonna fall in love- you guys all make it sound terrible."

He walked off as Blair and Starr laughed, and Starr turned back to her mother with a hopeful look.

"So, mom, after I talk with Langston and go shower and stuff, may I have permission to go to Schuyler's and warn him- oh, oops, sorry, I mean tell him- in person?"

"Yes, that's fine. I want you here for dinner at 7, okay?"

"Okay," Starr replied as she left the room, still strongly considering telling him to run.

* * *

"We need to talk!" Starr announced her presence loudly as she came storming into Schuyler's room. There was no response, and she frowned. "Schuyler?"

"Starr? Is that you?" he called a second later as she heard the bathroom door open.

"Uh, is there another female who lets herself into your room?" she asked pointedly as she wandered in his direction. "If the answer to that isn't no, I'm kicking your ass."

"I think we both learned yesterday that's an empty threat."

"Oh, ha-ha. Fine then, I'll make Langston kick your ass, and then kick the girl's twice."

"Well then, good thing there is no girl- trust me, even someone who's been in this town as short a time as I have knows better than to screw around on a Manning."

"Good answer," she laughed.

Starr walked into the back room and found Schuyler, tugging a shirt over his head, hair still wet from the shower; she instantly grinned at just the sight of him, a warm feeling of complete happiness and contentment spreading throughout her. She wordlessly closed the distance between them, enveloping herself in his embrace. Schuyler returned her hug for a moment, running his fingers through her hair, then tilted her head back as he cradled it, swooping down and capturing her lips in a brief, soft kiss.

"I missed you," she murmured, resting her forehead against his.

"I missed you too."

"Oh, God, we are sickening, do you realize that?" Starr laughed a moment later, breaking the moment. Schuyler chuckled.

"I do; I always swore I was not going to be one of 'those' couples, with the constant I love yous and missing each other after an hour- one of many things you've made me do that I never thought I would."

"What, you didn't expect to fall in love with a student, or encourage her to commit perjury, or beat a convicted rapist unconscious?"

"For the record, I didn't really encourage you to commit perjury, I just suggested that you shouldn't rule out the option if that was what you wanted to do."

"Oh, that's not my version of the story," Starr informed him playfully. "If that ever comes back to haunt me, you're going down with me- just to give you fair warning." Schuyler shrugged, grinning.

"We're already partners in crime," he reminded her, gesturing between them. "I see no reason for that to change."

"Partners in crime, I like the sound of that," Starr said with a smile, winding her arms around Schuyler's neck and rising up on her toes to kiss him again.

He held her body to his tightly, deepening the kiss, and Starr reluctantly pulled away with a frustrated groan as she felt his hand creeping up her shirt, placing her own hands on his chest as she shook her head.

"Wait, we really do have to talk."

"We have to talk? Four words nobody ever wants to hear," Schuyler remarked, brow furrowed with worry. She flashed a quick smile, attempting to be reassuring.

"No, it's okay, it's nothing bad. Well, kind of. Well, no, it's not now, but it could be. It probably won't be. But I don't know for sure, so I just wanted to-"

"Starr," Schuyler interrupted her, appearing nervous now. "Just tell me."

"Okay, um kind of a long story here. Uh, back on that first day you broke up with me, when I went home, my mom was waiting for me and she said that Marty told her about you and me- Cole told her everything that night at my dad's house. She asked me if it was true, and I was so miserable that I didn't have the energy to lie anymore, so I told her about us. She didn't really say anything about it then because I was so heartbroken that she didn't want to make it worse…"

Schuyler flinched and turned his head, looking incredibly guilty and shamed, and Starr cupped his cheek, turning him back to her and tenderly kissing him.

"Hey, no guilt. We're so far past that, remember? Things are great now, we're happy, keep the focus there." She waited for him to nod, then continued. "Anyway, she could tell this morning we had gotten back together because of how happy I was again, and she jumped right on that. We talked about everything, annnd…she wants you to come to dinner tonight," she finished in a rush, anxiously waiting for his reaction.

"Oh, that's it? I thought it was something more serious," he chuckled, sounding relieved. Starr gaped.

"Excuse me? That's not serious enough for you? My insane and insanely overprotective family wants to meet you and have the 'What are your intentions with our Starr?' talk- you don't find that a tad worrisome?"

"Well, yeah, sure, but Starr, when you said you told your mom everything about us, I was expecting the story to end with 'And she's on her way over here with a gun' not 'And she wants to have dinner with you.' So, it's already going better than I expected. And keep in mind, I've already 'met' your father, so the worst of your family is already out of the way- way I see it, it's all uphill from here."

"I like your newfound optimism," Starr laughed. "And I'm sure you're right. I'm just protective of you, I know I'm overreacting- my mom said she almost feels like she should thank you, actually."

"Thank me? For what?" Schuyler asked, confused and startled by that.

"For making me so happy," Starr answered, nudging him pointedly. "See, it's not just me, she knows it too. She said when I'm with you, it's the happiest she's ever seen me, and that as long as you continue to make me that way, she'll make sure this all works." Schuyler smiled warmly at her, deeply touched he could for Starr even half of what she did for him. "You're not planning on stopping that anytime soon, are you?"

"Nope," he chuckled, wrapping his arms around Starr and kissing the top of her head.

"Then we shouldn't have a problem. You know, I complained a lot, but I'm actually kind of glad you're meeting my family," Starr confessed. "It's sort of nice that the people all I love the most are all going to be together. And like I said, my mom seems pretty cool about this."

"I still can't believe that," Schuyler remarked, sounding amazed as he shook his head. Starr shrugged.

"I'm guessing that it's because she's like 'Well, she's already gotten pregnant, parent's worst fear already realized, what else could possibly happen?'" Starr remarked with a dark laugh. "Other than getting pregnant again, I guess, but, uh, no way in hell," she said with a shudder. "I mean, everyone knows how much I love Hope and how grateful I am for her, but…no, not for a very long time. So she knows she's got nothing to worry about there, she knows how much I love you and how happy you make me, and you won major points from her when you saved me from Zach. I don't think we'll have any problems with her- just like I told you," she reminded him with a smug smile. Schuyler laughed. "I should warn you, though, I think it's going to be a different story with Jack."

"Uh-oh, really?" Schuyler asked, chuckling.

"Yeah; he felt really bad about his part in the Zach incident and has actually become sort of…protective of me as a result; it's really weird, I'm still getting used to him smiling at me instead of glaring like he wishes I was dead," she laughed. "He sounded just a little too eager when my mom told him you were coming over, I think he's plotting to ambush you. If he does, do me a favor and just let him- he's too small to do any real damage and it'll be good for his self-esteem."

"Okay," he agreed, grinning in amusement. "That's the least I can do. You know, if you had asked me which of your family members I was worried about trying to attack me, your little brother would not have been high on the list."

"Life apparently has a way of surprising you this year. How would you say that's working out for you?" Starr asked playfully. Schuyler gave an over the top shrug, making a so/so motion.

"Eh, not bad."

"Not bad?" Starr demanded, just a hint of a smile on her face.

She grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him down to her, crushing his mouth to hers in a passionate kiss, dragging her lips across his slowly and warmly.

"You wanna reconsider that answer?" she murmured against his lips.

"Mmm, I don't know, I think I need more persuasion," he told her with a smirk, grasping her hips as he kissed her hotly.

Starr moaned, that familiar weak kneed feeling returning, and hooked her arms under Schuyler's, her fingers digging into his shoulders as she hopped up and wound her legs around his waist; Schuyler's hands slid underneath her thighs, holding her up with ease as he kissed her eagerly.

"Do we have to be there anytime soon?" he asked her breathlessly minutes later. Starr grinned wickedly, quickly shaking her head.

"Nope; we have all day."

* * *

After several hours, which had been divided between activities that definitely did not include talking, Starr telling him the shocking news about Lola and the two of them discussing that at length, Schuyler attempting to approach the subject of Starr possibly talking to her father (much as he hated to- he knew Starr wanted to reconcile with Todd, deep down, but was far too stubborn to admit it) only to be met with a dirty look, catching up on things they'd missed during their break-up, and Starr trying to help coach him for the night with her family, the duo were finally getting ready to leave. Starr grabbed her phone, calling home to let them know they were on their way.

"Hello?" Jack answered after several rings, his voice sounding oddly strained. Starr furrowed her brow; Jack never answered the phone at home.

"Hey, Jack, it's Starr. Where's mom?"

"She's, uh, in the kitchen with dad."

"She's what?" Starr repeated sharply in disbelief. Schuyler looked over at her curiously, and Starr just shook her head, shooting him a confused look. "Jack, what are you talking about? Why is dad there?"

"He came over to argue with mom some more about the custody trial."

"Oh my God, I didn't even know he was still going through with that," Starr scoffed. "What happened, is everything alright? Are they fighting?"

"They were at first, but, um, I think they worked it out."

"They…worked it out?" Starr repeated dubiously. "Dad comes over to yell at mom, and after weeks of fighting like cats and dogs about this, they just work it out?"

"I guess they just finally actually listened to each other, y'know? Probably doesn't hurt that McPain's out of the way now, right?" he remarked with an oddly nervous sounding laugh.

"Um, okay. What are they doing in the kitchen, exactly?"

"…making popcorn."

"You're kidding, right?" she snorted.

"Well, we're all going to the movies together, and dad says theater popcorn is lousy."

"Jack, wait, I don't understand. Why are you going to the movies? Mom's the one who was so insistent that she had to meet Schuyler properly tonight."

"I think she just wants to let me and Sam see dad while things are still good and they're sort of getting along, and she doesn't have to actually talk to him if we go to a movie, right?"

"Um, I guess. Hey, Jack, let me talk to mom, okay?"

"What? Oh, sorry Starr, mom was just saying she wants me to go put Sam in the car."

"No, Jack, wait a sec, give mom the-"

"No time; we've gotta get going if we want to make the show. I'll talk to you later Starr. I…I love you," he added hesitantly. Starr's eyebrows nearly shot up into her hairline, unable to believe she'd just heard that.

"Jack, I-"

He abruptly hung up, and Starr's frown slowly deepened as she stared at her phone.

"What is going on over there?"

"Starr? What is it?" Schuyler asked in concern, walking up behind the couch where she was sitting.

"I don't really know- hold on a sec, okay?" she asked, punching in her dad's number.

It rang until the voicemail picked up, and Starr sighed, trying Langston next- same thing. A cold feeling starting to spread throughout her stomach, she dialed her mom and Dorian's cell phones as well, and still received no answer.

"Why is nobody picking up?" she asked Schuyler anxiously after repeating what Jack had told her. He quickly walked around the couch and took a seat next to her, winding a comforting arm around her shoulders. Starr sighed, leaning into him.

"Hey, calm down, okay? I'm sure you're getting worked up over nothing," he told her gently. "It's not so strange for your parents to suddenly call a truce, is it? You've told me about how hot and cold they are."

"Yeah, that's true."

"And, if your mom really doesn't have a problem with me, then it actually makes sense for her to want to get your dad out of the house; she couldn't exactly call you and tell you not to come home if he was already there and would overhear, and it was pretty close to the time we'd be showing up- I think we all know how well it would have gone over with your dad if I had walked in with you."

"Good point, I didn't think of that," she muttered, mulling that possibility over. She frowned, cocking her head. "But why aren't Dorian and Langston answering either?"

"They probably just left to go do something else when your dad showed up- he seems like he knows how to clear a room." Starr almost broke a smile at that.

"Another good point," she admitted, relaxing slightly. "Okay, you're probably right, I'm once again freaking out unnecessarily. I'm just gonna call the house again and speak to someone on the staff real quick, it'll ease my nerves."

Starr dialed home once more, patiently waiting for Shaun or someone to answer the phone, but yet again, there was no answer. She took a deep breath, repeating to herself that she was overreacting- they were probably just busy cleaning up the kitchen, packing away the food they'd prepared for the dinner that was no longer happening or something. She waited a few minutes, giving them time to finish whatever they were doing, and called again. This time, when nobody picked up, Starr could feel her heart drop and all thoughts of remaining calm instantly flew out the window.

"Okay, something is wrong!" she cried anxiously, jumping to her feet as she began digging at her wrist and launched into a frantic ramble. "I'm sorry, Schuyler, I know I probably sound like this insane freak or something right now, and I probably am turning something into nothing and my family is going to make fun of me forever when they hear I was so worried while they were all just at the theater watching Monsters versus Aliens or whatever, but I can't help it, I have this bad feeling, and I would just feel better if we could go to my house and check out what's going on ourselves, and it's fine if you think I'm sort of crazy now, but-"

"Starr," Schuyler cut her off firmly as he stood to his feet as well, prying her hand away from her wrist, holding it in his tightly. "I don't think you're crazy, and you don't have to apologize to me, okay? We can leave right now."

"Thank you," Starr replied softly in relief, releasing a tense, shaky breath. She quickly threw her arms around Schuyler in a brief, grateful hug. "For what it's worth, I'm really hoping that I actually am just crazy."


	22. Chapter 22

After what felt like an eternity to Starr, she and Schuyler finally arrived at La Boule, and she had to resist the urge to bolt to the front door, ordering herself to keep calm as she and Schuyler walked up the path. Once they were finally at the front door, Starr inserted her key, but suddenly froze, her frown deepening as she removed it.

"What?"

"It's already unlocked. We've all been super careful about keeping the place locked up after what happened to poor Talia, I really doubt anyone in my family would have left it unlocked."

Now Schuyler's eyes abruptly darkened as well, his body tensing as he suddenly seemed to take her bad feeling much more seriously. Starr reached for the handle, but Schuyler quickly grabbed her wrist.

"Let me go in first, okay?" he requested. Ordinarily, Starr might have rolled his eyes at the overprotective gesture (while secretly finding it sweet), but she had worked herself up into a near frenzy on the ride over, imagining the possibilities, so she simply nodded, shuffling back.

Schuyler opened the front door slowly, Starr anxiously peering over his shoulder, and the two exchanged a cautious look when they saw nobody in the front room, slowly walking inside.

"Hello?" Schuyler called out.

A figure suddenly rose from one of the couches in the living room, the doors to which had been left open, and Starr gasped as she recognized them.

"_Kyle_?" she asked in shock as the man, looking like a deer in the headlights, nervously walked out of the living room to join them in the entry room.

"Uh, hey, Starr- Schuyler," he added slowly, glancing at the other man in confusion.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Schuyler instantly demanded, his tone angry and hard, staring Kyle down with an expression that suggested he answer quickly. Kyle swallowed roughly.

"I'm babysitting; nobody, um, mentioned that to you?" he asked Starr.

Starr inhaled sharply, not answering him as she realized what that meant; either Jack had been lying when she called or Kyle was lying now- neither possibility seemed good to her.

"_Really_, Kyle?" Schuyler asked calmly, in a tone that clearly screamed bullshit on his story. "You're a lab tech by day, babysitter by night?"

"Med school's expensive," Kyle stuttered, shrugging. "Can't be picky about the jobs I take to pay it off."

"Uh-huh. Can I ask who you're babysitting, exactly?" Schuyler questioned, giving Kyle the rope to hang himself with. Kyle smiled tightly, hesitating- he obviously seemed to be struggling to figure out if that was a trick question or not.

"Starr's little brothers."

"Huh. That's weird, considering that my brothers are supposed to be at the movies with my parents," Starr jumped in, her voice steadier now, and quickly growing hot with anger. Was this why Jack had sounded so strange on the phone earlier? Was Kyle there, instructing him what to say to keep Starr from thinking anything was wrong? The thought of him doing a thing to her brothers made Starr want to strangle him.

"There…there must have been some kind of misunderstanding or miscommunication," Kyle replied, fumbling over his words as he struggled to draw breath, obviously panicking as things went to hell. "I showed up to take over for the first babysitter, she told me the kids were asleep upstairs, that's all I know."

"What other babysitter?" Schuyler demanded.

"I, uh, don't know her name, sorry."

"Yeah, keep digging yourself in deeper," Starr snapped from behind Schuyler, looking up the stairs with worry written all over her face. "Sam! _Jack_!" she shouted as loudly as possibly, repeating their names a second later. Her heart grew cold with dread when there was no response. "If they were just sleeping, they should have been able to hear that, and they should have answered me," she hissed, clenching her fists. "Why didn't they answer me, Kyle?" Then without actually giving him a chance to response, Starr turned towards the rest of the downstairs level of the house. "Mom?! Moe, Noelle?" When her only response was once again silence, she looked back to Kyle with narrowed eyes. "Why isn't _anybody_ answering me? What the hell is going on?"

"I, um…I don't exactly know, okay?" he admitted in frustration. "I think I got caught up in something I didn't mean to- I'm just here to babysit."

"What do you-"

"Starr," Schuyler interrupted her, keeping his gaze on Kyle. "Why don't you go upstairs and see if your brothers are really there, okay?"

"Okay," she agreed quietly, looking at Schuyler curiously. She turned towards the stairs, pausing to shoot the other man a hardened look. "They better be okay, Kyle!" she snapped protectively as she hauled it upstairs.

Ordinarily, it would have seemed funny for a small teenage girl to be threatening a full grown man, but her voice made it clear she wasn't kidding, and her threat was no laughing matter; in Starr's opinion, if there was one thing people should know about the Mannings it was that you couldn't mess with any single member of the family and think any of the rest would let you get away with it.

Once Starr was gone, Kyle sighed, turning his attention back to Schuyler.

"Look, Schuyler, this is all a big-"

Kyle was suddenly cut off as Schuyler grabbed him by the throat and violently slammed him against the nearest wall, his fingers tightly digging into his neck. Kyle wheezed in a short breath, gazing at Schuyler in wide eyed fear and shock.

"Listen, Kyle," he hissed darkly. "I've always had a bad feeling about you, and right now, I'm starting to think I've been justified all along, so I'm already not too fond of you. But if I find out you're doing something to hurt this family?" Schuyler began, giving a dark, sarcastic laugh. "Oh, it's gonna get a hell of a lot worse for you. So I suggest you quit with the stuttering and stammering and trying to save your own ass, and give me some real answers, _now_. What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded, loosening his grip just enough to let him speak.

"I told you, baby-sitting."

"Why did Starr's little brother tell her he and Sam were going to the movies with their parents if they were here being babysat by you?"

"_I don't know_, I don't know what else to tell you. I'm with a babysitting service, I get a call from someone else who works with them saying she's watching the Manning kids, but just got called away on an emergency and needs someone to fill in. I come over, she tells me the kids are sleeping so there's no need to check on them, so I just take a seat in the living room, and five minutes later you two come barging in. What_ are_ you doing here, by the way?"

"You actually think you're in a position to be asking _me_ questions?" Schuyler asked, clutching his throat tighter once more to remind Kyle who was in charge of this situation. "Now, it's really weird that she didn't tell you her name when she called you."

"No, she did, I just forgot it," Kyle choked out.

"You gonna keep changing your story? What's this babysitting service called? Give me their number so I can call just to make sure you're a member." Kyle remained silent, averting his eyes, and Schuyler shook his head. "That's what I thought. I don't like being lied to, Kyle," he hissed.

"Sch- Mr. Joplin!"

Schuyler quickly looked to the stairs as Starr shouted his name, though he did not let go of Kyle, and saw her walking down the steps hand in hand with Jack, who seemed withdrawn and frightened, keeping his eyes firmly on his shoes.

"Sam was sleeping," she informed him as they reached the bottom and she walked closer to Schuyler, keeping her brother behind her. "But I found Jack wrapped up in a blanket, in his _closet_," she spat, fixing Kyle with a murderous look. "Why is that, Kyle?"

"Oh, uh, the last sitter told me she'd been playing hide and seek with them before they went to bed- I guess he thought the game was still on." Schuyler rolled his eyes- he wasn't even a _good _liar.

"Jack, is that why you were in the closet?" Schuyler asked him gently and patiently.

Jack swallowed roughly, looking away, and just clutched his sister's leg nervously. Starr sighed and knelt beside Jack, giving him a comforting hug.

"He wouldn't tell me anything, or say a word at all," she softly told Schuyler over Jack's head. "He's terrified."

Schuyler looked back to Kyle with dangerously narrowed eyes, and abruptly slammed him to the wall again, even rougher this time.

"What the _hell_ did you to do to him, and where the hell is everyone else?" Schuyler thundered.

"You can keep threatening me all you want, Schuyler, but the answer's not gonna change because I don't _know_!"

"Okay, fine, Kyle. If you don't want to give us answers, then you can just wait here until we get them some other way," Schuyler snapped, shooting Starr a softer look as he gestured slightly to Jack. She nodded.

"I'll work on it," she told him quietly.

Schuyler tightly gripped Kyle by the shoulders and pushed him into the living room, firmly shoving him onto one of the couches. He took a seat next to him, shooting Kyle a look that strongly suggested he not try to run. Starr followed them in a moment later with Jack, and settled her brother down on the seat furthest from Kyle, kneeling in front of him so she was the only person he saw.

"Jack, it's okay, you can talk to me," she told him soothingly, smiling. "Look, there's nothing to be afraid of now. Mr. J and I are here, and we're gonna take care of everything, nobody's going to hurt you, but we need your help. I'm not going to be upset no matter what you say, I just need the truth. Earlier, you said you guys were all going to the movies- what was that about?" Jack remained frozen, staring at her fearfully. "Jack, please, it's really important for you to talk to me right now," she pleaded. "Do you know where mom and dad are? Do you…oh my God, you're shaking," she murmured softly, startled. "Jack, what are you so afraid of?"

"I'm sorry!" Jack choked out, wringing his hands anxiously.

"Oh, Jack, no, it's okay," Starr reassured him quickly, sitting next to her brother and hugging him again. He clung to her waist tightly. "I know this is hard, it's okay."

Kyle's cell phone suddenly rang, and he automatically started to reach for it before quickly stopping, shooting a nervous look to Schuyler.

"Am I allowed to answer that?"

"Oh, please do," Schuyler replied, watching him carefully.

"Rebecca?" Kyle answered anxiously after glancing at the screen.

"Guess again! So, you're Rebecca's brother, Kyle."

"What are you talking about?"

"Where's Powell Lord?" the unfamiliar voice demanded.

"I…I have no idea what you're talking about!"

"Listen to me, you son of a bitch, I know that you and your sister are up to your eyeballs in this. Tell me where they are!"

"What the hell-"

To Kyle's surprise, Schuyler suddenly reached out and yanked the phone away from him.

"Hello? Who is this?"

"…Joplin?" the voice asked in surprise after a moment. Schuyler furrowed his brow.

"John?" he asked slowly. "That you?"

"John?" Starr cried in surprise from across the room.

"John, what's going on?"

"I'm trying to figure that out myself. What are you doing with Kyle Lewis?"

"He was at the house when Starr and I showed up- can't seem to offer a good explanation as to why. Todd and Blair are missing, and Starr found Jack wrapped in a blanket in his closet, and he's terrified, he can't even talk."

"Shit, this is what I was afraid of. Look, keep Kyle there, okay? I should be there within ten minutes, and I called Fish, he should be there any second. Tell Starr that Kyle is Rebecca Lewis's brother and that she and Powell Lord have been behind all of this, and that I think they have her parents, she'll explain everything to you. Got it?"

"Got it."

"What did John say?" Starr asked the moment Schuyler hung up.

He was just about to answer when the doorbell suddenly rang; Jack jumped, looking startled, and Schuyler threw a reassuring look his way.

"John said he called Fish and that he was going to be here any second, that has to be him. Can you get that, Starr?" he asked, not wanting to leave Kyle alone with them. She nodded, jumping to her feet and rushing to the front room. Jack stared after his sister anxiously, clearly not liking her being out of sight right now, and Schuyler smiled at him. "It's going to be okay, Jack, I promise. We'll get everything figured out."

Starr returned a second later, Fish following behind her, appearing apprehensive, and Kyle sighed in relief, rising to his feet. Schuyler followed quickly behind, gripping his shirt tightly.

"Fish! Ugh, thank God. How's it going, man? Look, there's been some huge misunderstanding, I'm sure you can deal with it. I was just here finishing up a babysitting gig, but I've really got to get going, so can you-"

"No, Kyle," Fish said quickly, sighing. "I can't let you go anywhere."

"What are you talking about?" Kyle asked slowly.

"Look, John McBain called and told me there was some kind of situation here, told me to wait at the house and not let anyone leave until he got here."

"What situation?" Kyle snorted. "Does it look like there's a situation here? Other than this psycho practically holding me hostage?"

"If there's no situation, why is my brother so scared that he can't even talk?!" Starr shouted angrily.

"Look, I don't know what the hell is going on here, but I know I'm not involved in it, so I'm going to get go-"

"Like hell you are," Schuyler snapped, shoving Kyle back down on the couch.

"He's right, Kyle, you can't leave," Fish informed him quietly. "Now, if there's some misunderstanding, let's straighten it out. Just tell us-"

"Don't even waste your time, he's been lying left and right since we got here," Schuyler remarked in disgust, shaking his head. "Just watch him for a minute, okay?" he asked, walking over to Starr and pulling her aside, fixing her with a serious look.

"What else did John say?" she immediately asked, keeping a watchful eye on Jack as they spoke.

"He told to me to tell you that Kyle is Rebecca Lewis's brother, that she and Powell Lord have been behind everything, and that he suspects Powell and Rebecca have your parents, he said you could explain that," Schuyler told her quietly. Starr frowned for a moment.

"Powell Lord…oh my God!" she gasped as she recognized the name, hands flying to her mouth as her eyes were instantly filled with horror. "Oh, God, Powell and Rebecca," she repeated in dread, appearing terrified.

"Starr, who are they? What's going on?" Schuyler asked in worry.

"Starr?" Jack called over to her nervously, timidly, seeing his sister's reaction.

Starr quickly turned and plastered a tight smile on her face, walking back over to Jack and comfortingly squeezing his shoulder.

"It's okay, buddy, Mr. J and I are just talking about something. Hey, you wanna do me a really big favor? Go upstairs and check on Sam again, okay? Can you do that?"

Jack nodded, eager to get away from the pressure downstairs and focus on someone else, and quickly hurried from the room and up the stairs. Starr rushed back to Schuyler.

"Let's go to the kitchen, okay?" she requested, not wanting to discuss this near Kyle.

Schuyler nodded, instructed Fish to keep his eye on Kyle once more, and followed her to the kitchen. Once they were alone, the calm she'd been trying to project in front of Jack vanished and she looked to Schuyler with true fear and panic in her eyes.

"Schuyler, Powell Lord is another one of my dad's old frat brothers," she immediately told him, wasting no time. Schuyler slowly shut his eyes, bracing himself.

"One of the ones who…?"

"Yeah," she choked out. "He was supposed to be in a mental institution, and if he's really out, this is so, _so_ bad. Zach is just evil and cruel, but Powell is completely insane- initially, after the…incident, he felt really guilty and actually confessed to what they all did, but he eventually had a complete nervous breakdown, became a serial rapist, and tried to kill my dad a couple different times. I don't know that much about Rebecca- I think she and Powell were engaged once. Oh my God, if he has my dad…" Starr trailed off, biting her lip and blinking rapidly, trying not to lose it.

"Oh my God," Schuyler sighed heavily, barely able to comprehend this was happening. "Starr, I am so sorry I thought you were overreacting," he told her quietly. Starr sighed, waving off the apology.

"No, please, don't be. People supposedly going to the movies together and not answering their phones right away is not a cause for worry with normal families- I just don't happen to have one of those, a fact you're still getting used to. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so used to it either," she confessed softly. "Sometimes I wish I didn't have the kind of family where hearing that my parents were getting along well enough just to take my little brothers to a movie wasn't some big sign that something is wrong. I wish that for once, I could come home and discover something like my family sitting around, getting along and having one of their poker nights instead of coming home to discover that apparently, another one of my dad's old rapist buddies showed up and kidnapped my parents. And I _really_ _wish_ that I didn't have to make such screwed up wishes," she spat, hiding her face and shutting her eyes as tears burned them, furiously fighting to maintain composure- she didn't want to lose it right now, she didn't want Jack to see her like this when he was already so freaked out.

A second later, Starr felt a pair of strong arms envelop her, and she instantly lost all semblance of control, collapsing into Schuyler's embrace and weakly crying against his chest as he held her tightly; she may not have wanted this, but she'd needed it- this reminder that she wasn't alone anymore, that she had a real, true partner now, that she didn't have to be the caretaker of everyone else twenty-four seven, that she could take a minute to fall apart because she now had someone to put her back together.

"I'm so scared, Schuyler," Starr choked out, taking a trembling breath. "If Powell really does have them, they could already be dead."

"They're not," he reassured her, soothingly stroking her hair.

"You don't know that," she sobbed.

"If all Powell wanted was to kill them, he could have done it right here. If he took them somewhere else, he must have a plan, and that means there's still time. Your parents are tough, Starr, they'll hang in there until we can do something." Starr sniffled, picked up on the 'we'.

"This is _so_ messed up, you should not have to be dealing with things like this- this is hardly what you signed up for."

"Hey, Starr," Schuyler said intensely, drawing back and cupping her chin in his hand as he looked her in the eyes. "I signed up to be with you, whatever that may entail, and I don't regret that for a second. Trust me, if you _can_ handle all the messed up parts of my life, I can definitely handle yours. Besides, it keeps life exciting. What else was I going to be doing tonight if I wasn't with you- grading papers, eating take-out, and going to bed at 9 like a seventy year old man? Yeah, I'm real sorry I'm missing out on that."

Starr gave a watery laugh, and Schuyler brushed away her remaining tears with his thumbs; she managed a small smile as she pulled away.

"I'm okay now. I should get back in there, Jack will be coming back downstairs any second."

Schuyler simply nodded, lightly kissing her forehead before turning to walk back to the living room. Starr caught his hand, stopping him and pulling him back to her, and quickly rose up on her toes, brushing a soft kiss to his lips.

"I love you so much," she sighed. Schuyler cradled her head and kissed her sweetly and slowly, his feelings for her perfectly clear in that kiss.

"I love you, Starr, and nothing's going to change that, nothing is going to make me second guess this and want out, okay?"

Starr nodded tearfully; that was exactly what she'd needed to hear.

The duo returned to the living room at the same time as Jack, and Starr protectively returned to her little brother's side, trying to block out the bickering still going on between Kyle and Fish- God, they were like an old married couple. Starr was just about to reassure Jack that she was sure John would arrive at any moment, when there was a sudden loud pounding at the front door.

"Starr, it's John!" he shouted before anyone could even ask who it was.

Schuyler rushed to the door, opening it, and John stormed in, instantly zeroing in on Kyle and making a beeline to him without a word of greeting to anyone else.

"You! Where's your sister, where's Powell Lord?"

"I'm not saying anything else without a lawyer!" Kyle shouted defensively.

"Hey, I'm not a cop!" John snapped, seizing the front of Kyle's jacket and yanking him up off the couch.

"John!" Fish shouted, quickly tearing him away from Kyle. "You are in so much hot water already, do not make it worse!"

"John, where's Marty?" Starr cried when she realized the woman hadn't followed him in as she'd expected.

"That's what I'm trying to find out. Take him down to the station for questioning," John ordered. Fish sighed heavily, flashing Kyle a quick apologetic look.

"You heard him."

"What?! He _just said_ he's not a cop!"

"But I am," he reminded him. Kyle cradled his head in disbelief, looking sick.

"I'll talk, okay?! I will tell you everything I know." Everyone seemed to pause, gazing at Kyle expectantly. "Okay, I was just out at Rodi's, having a drink, when my sister, Rebecca, called me. She told me she was in Llanview, that she decided to move back and had been keeping it a surprise. She said she hadn't had time to set up a job, so just as a temporary solution, she signed up with this babysitting service- the service arranges everything, so the clients and sitters never actually meet, and, funny story, she winds up babysitting the Manning boys. She asked me about what Todd was up to these days, what I knew about him, whatever, so we talked for a while, and then all of the sudden, she sounded all worked up, and told me she completely forgot about this other appointment she had tonight, and begged me to take over for her. So, I drove over here, she told me the kids were sleeping and not to bother them by checking up on them, and rushed out. I just took a seat, and had been here for five minutes when these two came rushing in, and I was assaulted and pretty much held against my will," he snapped darkly.

"Why didn't you tell us that? Why'd you keep lying?" Schuyler demanded. Kyle slowly let out a breath.

"Because…it seemed to me like my sister might have gotten involved with something she shouldn't have, gotten in over her head, and I don't know, I was just trying to protect her by making sure I didn't say something I shouldn't. We all read the article about you committing perjury for your father, it's not like you can't relate," Kyle said to Starr.

"You should have told the truth after we found my brother in the closet and saw that he was _traumatized_," Starr hissed, glaring at him. "That's the difference; children weren't hurt when I protected my father."

"I think your baby would disagree," Kyle snorted; Starr abruptly crumpled, looking like Kyle had just knocked the wind out of her, as memories of clutching 'Hope's' gravestone, sobbing and telling her how sorry she was, filled her head.

Much to everyone's shock, including his own, Schuyler took one look at his girlfriend, on the brink of tears, and his fist suddenly shot out and he punched Kyle hard in the face, sending the room into a flurry of activity. Starr gasped, Kyle immediately started bitching and moaning as he cradled his bloody nose, Fish shouted something, jumping between them, John started yelling, he and Fish cancelling each other out, and then, to everyone's surprise, Jack suddenly emitted a small laugh. They all froze, Starr, Schuyler and John gazing at him hopefully, and Jack once again nervously dug his fingers into his sister's jeans.

"Alright, I can deal with this guy last," John said quickly as he nodded to Kyle (still quietly swearing and whining) turning his focus to Starr and Schuyler. "Real quick, tell me again what happened here."

"Okay, well, my mom has been going all college prep crazy lately, and she knows I want to major in biology and obviously knows Mr. Joplin has already done that," Starr began, mindful of Fish and Kyle's presence. "So she asked him over for dinner so she could talk to him about various college biology programs. He's never been here before, so we thought it would be easier if I just picked him up and gave him a ride over, so I left to get him, and we were just about to come over here, so I called home. Jack picked up, and he sounded really weird, and he claimed that my dad came over and he and my mom called a truce out of nowhere, and that they were taking him and Sam to the movies together. I had a bad feeling, so I called my parents, and neither of them answered. I called home again, then called Dorian and Langston, and still nobody was answering, so I started to freak and we rushed over here."

Starr explained the whole ordeal with Kyle and finding Jack, and Fish's frown grew deeper and deeper as he stared at Kyle.

"And that's all we know," she finished with a heavy sigh.

John ordered Fish to take Kyle to the front room, and once the four were left alone, cautiously gestured to Jack, a questioning look on his face. Starr shrugged helplessly but gestured for him to go ahead.

"Hi, Jack," John said gently, kneeling in front of the young boy. "Hey, listen, buddy; I know you don't like me too much, and that we don't always get along, but I'm trying to find your mom and dad, and I need your help. You think you can help me? Jack?" he prompted when he received no response.

"It's okay if it's too hard to talk about," Starr told her brother soothingly, though she was anxiously gnawing on her bottom lip, knowing Jack was their only hope for answers right now. "John, I'm sorry, I think he's just too freaked out."

"No, he's not," John replied calmly, smiling at Jack encouragingly. "I know Jack's a tough guy- aren't you, Jack? And I know something happened here tonight. Something scared you, but you don't have to be scared anymore. You're safe, no one's going to hurt you. We want to make sure no one hurts your mom and dad either. That's why I need you to talk to me. Okay? I want you to take a look at something, all right?" he asked, fishing two pictures out of his coat and showing them to Jack. "Have you seen these two people before? Jack, were they here?"

"He…he said they'd hurt Sam if I didn't lie and tell Starr we were going to the movies," Jack told him slowly, throwing his sister a distraught glance. "I'm sorry, Starr."

"No, Jack, it's okay, you did the right thing," Starr assured him, smiling warmly.

"That was really brave of you," Schuyler agreed.

"They're right. Now, what happened after you talked to Starr?"

"He…he took them."

"He took who?

"He took my mom, dad, and Tea."

"Tea?" Starr asked in surprise. "What was she doing here?"

"Some of the stuff I told you was true," Jack told his sister. "Dad really did come over to fight with mom about the trial, and then Tea showed up too, and she and mom both yelled at dad for a while, but then…I heard everything get really quiet. And then when they were sleeping, the guy in the picture took them away. Find them. Find my mom and dad," he begged, his voice growing emotional. "Bring them home before something bad happens."

"I'm gonna try buddy, I just need more help from you. You're doing good, Jack. I just need you to think. Can you remember anything that Powell or Rebecca said?

"I don't know," he mumbled.

"All right, what about, maybe, something that they did? You know? Even if it doesn't seem important, it might help us find your mom and dad."

"I don't know."

"Jack, you're safe now," Starr reminded him, rubbing his back.

"That's right- no one is going to hurt you or your sister or Sam."

"And you did a really great job with him, Jack," Schuyler encouraged him. "You took great care of your brother."

"I thought they were here to help us," Jack choked out.

"Powell?"

"He was dressed as an ambulance guy, and she was dressed as a doctor."

"Okay. So you thought they were here to help your mom and dad?"

"But they weren't here to help us- they were here to hurt everyone! I just wish mom and dad were still here," he said weakly.

"I know, me too," Starr murmured. "Hey, Jack, what happened to the staff? Were they knocked out too, or…?"

"What? No, my mom sent them all away after you left this morning. She said they couldn't be here tonight because nobody can know that Schuyler's your boyfriend."

"Oh, God, duh," Starr sighed, frustrated with herself for not realizing that.

"All right, we're almost done here. Just try to remember, Jack. Did Powell or Rebecca make any phone calls? Did they say where they might be going?" Jack simply shook his head. "All right. Thanks for all your help, buddy," John sighed, rising to his feet and walking a few feet away. Starr and Schuyler followed.

"I don't think he knows how they knocked the three of them out," Schuyler noted.

"It was probably the same thing they did to me."

"You got knocked out?" Starr asked in concern.

"Yeah, there was an empty envelope. It was treated with some kind of drug."

"But you're okay, right?"

"I can still feel it in my system, but I think I'm fine.

"There was an envelope here, too," Jack spoke up. They all exchanged a look of surprise.

"There was?" John asked.

" The lady -- Rebecca -- she called it an invitation."

"What else did she say, Jack?"

"She told the man to get rid of it, because it might hurt her- I, um, think she was supposed to stay here."

"They gave you all the same envelopes?" Schuyler asked John, frowning curiously. John shook his head.

"Mine was just an envelope, I didn't get an invitation."

"An invitation to what?" Schuyler wondered in frustration.

"Wait a second," John suddenly groaned, freezing as the pieces fell into place. "Today's date, K.A.D. -- all kind of makes sense."

"What makes sense?"

"That spring fling," John told them grimly.

"Oh my God," Starr cried in horror as she understood too, reflexively reaching out and clutching Schuyler's arm tightly. "You think he's trying to recreate the spring fling?!"

"It's possible."

"But why would he take Tea and my mom? He'd just need Cole's mom and my dad," Starr remarked, sounding disgusted.

"Look, I know it doesn't entirely make sense, but we have to consider the possibility that he's recreating the night that Marty was raped- we have no other real theories."

"I can't believe this," Starr said, shaking her head as tears pierced her eyes.

"Hey, don't freak out, okay? Be cool I'm going to find them. Jack," he called out to the boy, who nervously looked back at him. "Thanks for all your help, buddy."

"Wait. You're leaving?" Starr asked in alarm as John turned and started for the door.

"It's okay, Fish has got a squad car coming over here. Someone's going to take Kyle to the station, and Fish and another officer will stay here all night, you'll be perfectly safe."

"No, it's not that," Starr said, taking a deep breath and looking him in the eyes. "I'm going with you."

John and Schuyler both threw her startled frowns, and John quickly shook his head.

"No, you're not- no way in hell."

"_Yes_, I am," she snapped hotly. "These are my parents, John."

"I don't have time to waste arguing with you!"

"Then don't!" she shouted. "You're right, every minute spent here is a minute wasted, so you don't have time to talk me out of this- let's go."

"You gonna leave your brothers here alone with a couple of officers they don't even know? When Jack's already so scared?"

Starr glared at John, and deliberately yanked her phone out of her pocket, quickly calling Langston- to her immense relief, her friend finally answered this time.

"Hey, Starr! What's up?"

"Where have you been?!" Starr exploded.

"Um, hi to you too. Dorian and I went out to the movies when your dad showed up and the yelling started- my phone's been off, sorry. Hey, what happened with that? Is he still there? Did they work it out? Did the dinner with Schuyler still happen? I was just thinking, what if-"

"Langston, shut up!"

"Excuse me? God, Starr, it's been one day, are you seriously sex deprived already? Because I don't know what else could be causing this attitude!"

"Crap, I'm really sorry, Langston," Starr sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Look, I didn't mean that at all, I'm just freaking out right now, and I have _no_ time to explain. Something really bad is going on, and I need you to get home and be with Jack, ASAP. There will be a couple cops here, they'll explain as much as they can, and I'll give you the full story later. Can you do that?"

"Yeah, of course, we'll be right there" Langston said softly, her tone heavy with confusion and concern. "I don't know what's going on, but you said it's bad, so…be careful, okay?"

"I will," Starr promised, hanging up and shooting John a look. "Anything else?"

John glared at her for a moment, then gave up, throwing his arms in the air.

"I clearly can't stop you. You stay behind me the whole time, and if at any point I tell you to run, to hide, to do _anything_, you _do it_, no arguments- clear?"

"Crystal," she replied, her voice unnervingly calm as she prepared herself for this. John's eyes shifted to Schuyler, who was still staring at Starr in worry.

"I'm guessing that means you're coming too?"

Schuyler simply nodded, and Starr seemed thrown, turning to her boyfriend.

"What? Schuyler, no, they're _my_ parents, you don't have-"

"Partners, remember?" he interrupted pointedly. Starr nearly smiled at that.

"Okay. Well, where are we all going, then?"

"Llanview University. They boarded up the old KAD house a long time ago, and that's my first guess as to where he'd take them. That or the new house."

"But the new one's all the way across campus," Starr said softly, her eyes heavy. They all knew what this meant- fifty/fifty chance, but there was only one shot and if John guessed wrong, Starr's parents and Marty and Tea were all most likely dead.

"I'm sure they're at the old one, all right? Hey, Jack- take care of yourself, okay? Dorian and Langston are gonna be home real soon, just hang in there."

"Wait, what?!" Jack cried, his eyes wide as he looked to his sister. "You're leaving too?!"

"Oh, Jack, I have to," Starr told him softly, hurrying to his side. "I'm just going to help John find mom and dad- we'll all be back here before you know it, okay?"

"Starr, I'm sorry I lied to you on the phone!" he said in a rush.

"No, it's okay, you were looking out for mom and dad!"

"But if I told you, maybe you could've helped them sooner."

"Or Rebecca and Powell might have hurt them. It would've been real easy for you to tell me that you needed help, but you did the brave thing."

"Really?" he sniffed.

"Really. You were the hero. Because of you, our parents are going to be okay, and Schuyler, John and I are just gonna go make sure of that. We'll be back soon, I promise."

"Okay," he sighed, looking at her hesitantly. "Hey, Starr? Um, on the phone… when I said 'I love you,' I really meant that part."

"I know, Jack," Starr said softly, throwing her arms around her brother in a brief hug. "I love you, too. Go to the kitchen and get some cookies, okay? You can eat the whole box if you want, I'll tell mom I said it was okay."

"Cool," Jack said with a smile, heading off to the kitchen.

Starr sighed and rushed back over to Schuyler and John, and John quickly led them both out to the car. Schuyler took her hand in his for support, and Starr squeezed tightly, really hoping they'd be able to keep that promise she'd made to her brother.

* * *

Author's Note: Okay, quick explanation of how the kidnapping worked out in my world, since I know certain things are different in YFM Land: Powell sends Todd some fake notice about the custody trial, and Todd plays into Powell's hand by reacting as he wanted, going over to Blair's to confront her. On the way, he calls Tea, leaves some obnoxiously cocky message about how he's sure she'll represent him, ends by asking her if she wants to hook up that night, and Tea, who's already had it with Todd, loses it and leaves to confront him. She sees his car parked at La Boule while driving to his place, storms in, she and Blair bitch Todd out. At some point, they all make the discovery with the envelopes, finally open them, pass out, Powell and Rebecca show up, and then it plays out like Jack and Kyle explained. I realize this is highly convenient and more a result of luck than good planning on Powell's part, but I write romance, okay? The complicated revenge plots are not my thing, lol :P


	23. Chapter 23

The trio silently crept into the old boarded up frat house, the car out front having left them without any doubt that Powell must have brought them here. John cautiously held his gun ready in front of him, prepared for Powell or Rebecca to be waiting for them, but they seemed to be alone downstairs. They all breathed slowly and silently, Starr anxiously clinging to Schuyler's shoulder as they waited for some kind of a sign.

"For _once_ in your _life_, I want you to have to accept responsibility for what you've done!" an angry voice suddenly shouted from upstairs, abruptly breaking the silence. Starr jumped slightly, chills racing through her spine. John glanced at the ceiling with a look of grim determination.

"Listen, we're going to head upstairs, but I want you two to hang back once we're there," John instructed in a whisper. "I'm going to see what's going on and who he has so we know what we're dealing with, then I'll come back and tell you the plan. Got it?"

Starr and Schuyler both nodded wordlessly, and they followed John upstairs, staying back at the landing just as he'd instructed while he wandered down the halls, searching for the right room. Starr desperately wanted to say something, _anything_ to Schuyler, just so she wouldn't have to wait in this overwhelmingly tense silence, but knew they shouldn't talk more than absolutely necessary, so she settled for holding his hand tightly as she anxiously waited for John's return.

When he finally came back after what had only been a few minutes but had felt like an eternity, John somehow looked even more upset, and Starr felt her heart drop to her stomach.

"Oh my God, is someone hurt?" she blurted out softly, unable to consider anything worse.

"I don't know," John told her, furrowing his brow. "Powell's only got Todd and Marty up here, but there are two more chairs which still have bonds on them- Blair and Tea were definitely in there at some point too. He must have moved them somewhere else."

Starr paled, and Schuyler moved his hands to reassuringly squeeze her shoulders; she sighed, leaning into his chest.

"Well, he hasn't had enough time to go far," Schuyler pointed out. "They have to at least be nearby."

"What do we do?" Starr questioned nervously.

"We've gotta split up," John said reluctantly. "Someone looks for Blair and Tea, someone rescues Todd and Marty."

"Starr and I will go find Tea and her mom," Schuyler said instantly. "You handle Powell. Come on, Starr, let's-"

"No," Starr uttered softly. Schuyler stopped, and he and John both looked at her in surprise.

"What?"

"No," she repeated, more firmly. "God, I really, _really_ do not want to separate from you, Schuy," she choked out, her heart seizing at the thought. "But…I have to stay with John- I have to stay with my dad," she corrected herself quietly.

"Starr, _no,_" Schuyler protested instantly, his tone hard but his eyes pleading with her. "That's not going to happen, I'm not just leaving you here with Powell." Starr lowered her head in frustration, digging her fingers into her hair.

"I'm not going to debate this, Schuyler."

"Neither I am!" he hissed. "I came to make sure nothing happened to you, and that's what I'm going to do- that kind of includes not abandoning you with the psycho."

"Look, Schuyler," she snapped, feeling the lump building in her throat. " 'I absolutely hate you' and 'go to hell' were the last things I said to my dad, okay? He thinks I hate him and don't care what happens to him, and…" Starr trailed off in frustration as tears burned her eyes, frantically shaking her head. "And now he's being held hostage by someone who has wanted the chance to murder him for years, and I don't know how this is going to end, so I cannot just leave him."

"Starr, I understand that you feel guilty, but it doesn't mean you go get yourself killed for him, and I will be _damned_ if I just walk away and let that happen," Schuyler spat.

"That _won't_ happen! John and I will have it under control, okay?" He still looked like he was going to put up a fight, and Starr softened as she tried to reason with him. "Schuyler, _please_. What if this had been your mom? If you were put in a situation like this when things with your mom were so bad, could you have lived with yourself if you didn't go to her and make sure that no matter what, she knew you loved her?"

Schuyler sighed heavily, looking away; they both knew he couldn't say he would act any differently than she was now.

"Please go find my mom, Schuyler, _please_," she begged him intensely. "You guys are not going to get me to leave unless you drag me out of here kicking and screaming, so this is just a waste of time, and for all we know, my mom could be seriously hurt and not _have_ that time to waste. If you love me, please just go."

"You are not playing fair," he sighed again, a reluctant acceptance creeping into his eyes. "Okay. I hate this, but okay." He shot John a begging look over Starr's shoulder, his unspoken request to keep Starr safe clear, and John gave a small nod.

"Thank you," Starr murmured, throwing her arms around his neck.

Schuyler hugged her so tightly that she could hardly breathe, obviously even more worried than he was letting on. Starr swallowed roughly as she nuzzled her nose against his neck, breathing him in; she had been so focused on getting Schuyler to let her stay with Todd that she hadn't been able to really consider about what _he'd_ be doing, but now, the thought of him being alone as he searched the grounds absolutely terrified her, far more than the thought of facing Powell did.

"Be careful, okay?" she pleaded as she pulled back. "Make sure you come back to me in one piece."

"The danger magnet who has this nasty habit of always thinking of herself last is telling _me_ to be careful?" Schuyler asked, struggling (and failing) to make his tone light, keep his voice steady. "_You_ be careful, please. I'll see you soon, okay? I love you."

"I love you too."

He cupped her face, simply kissing her forehead; Starr understood. A real kiss felt too final, like a goodbye. She grabbed his hands, squeezing tightly as she mustered up a smile, then let him go, watching with a heavy heart until Schuyler was completely out of sight.

"You sure you want to go in there?" John asked her softly. Starr nodded tightly. He shot her a dark look, gesturing to his gun. "Well, this should be over fairly quickly anyway. You stay back, okay?"

"I'm not going to argue," she sighed, shuddering at the thought of what John was about to do. Guns freaked her out more than the average person- side effect of having them pressed to her head during hostage slash kidnapping situations one too many times.

John motioned for her to follow, and lead the way down the halls to the appropriate room; Starr could still hear Powell and her father arguing in quiet tones, and her breath caught in her throat as she felt a rush of fear that her dad was making it worse.

John pushed his back to the wall right next to the door, carefully listening to the voices in the room, waiting for a cue to enter and shoot, and Starr watched him with great anxiety, her heart thundering so wildly that it almost felt painful. John seemed to hear something he considered a good sign, and he held his free hand up, counting down from three fingers to warn her. When the last went down, he spun so he was now in the doorway, gun outstretched and finger on the trigger, but Starr heard a squeaking of wheels and John suddenly froze, his eyes wide.

"Ah ah ah," she heard a voice calmly reprimand from within the room. "Not very smart, John; you think I couldn't hear you skulking around in the hall earlier? Why don't you and whoever else is here come on inside and we can have a nice civilized conversation."

Whatever Powell was doing made John's calm control break, and a look of fear took it's place. He reluctantly started to step inside, though he did not lower his weapon. John motioned for Starr not to follow, but after taking a deep breath to try and gather herself, she did exactly that- Powell was just going to become more infuriated later if he realized she'd been there and hadn't followed orders.

"So, you got out of the straightjacket? That's impressive! I actually…" Powell suddenly stopped in midsentence as Starr slowly entered the room behind John, and he and Todd both froze, staring at her in disbelief. While Todd's features were set in horror, Powell's slowly split into a grin. "Starr!" he greeted her brightly. "Oh, so good to see you! Look, Todd, it's like our own little family reunion."

Starr swallowed roughly, her heart about to beat out of her chest as she tried not to focus on just Powell and glanced around the room in shock. Unlike the rest of the house, which looked like exactly what it was- a long abandoned building- Powell had completely restored this room, and decorated it down to the last detail; it looked like a group of frat boys still lived there. Starr felt a surge of disgust as she realized John had been exactly right; he was recreating the night of the rape.

She took a slow breath, allowing herself to glance at Powell, and saw that he had Marty, who was tied to a computer chair (that had been the cause of the wheels she'd heard, apparently) in front of him, using her as a shield so John couldn't fire a shot, holding a knife only inches from her throat. Starr tried to catch Marty's eye, but the woman was slumped over, gazing around the room blearily, and looked sick. Starr felt a strong twist of fear- oh God, what was wrong with her? Was she reacting badly to the drug Powell had knocked them out with?

"_You-brought-my-daughter?_"

Starr's head snapped to the side at the harsh, strangled whisper, and she gasped when she saw her father tied down to the bed, gazing at John in complete and utter rage.

"Dad," she whimpered. Todd didn't seem to hear.

"If Powell here doesn't do it for me I will _kill you_ for this, McBain," he hissed through clenched teeth, violently tugging at his bonds. Powell scoffed, furrowing his brow.

"Even now, your first thoughts are of _violence_. What went so wrong with you that this is how you think, Todd?"

"You expect us to believe you're not thinking the same thing?" John asked calmly, his gaze never wavering. "Because the knife in your hand says differently."

"I'm trying to put an _end_ to all of this violence and darkness, once and for all- it's not my fault you came barging in with a gun and interrupted, _forcing_ me to do this. Give me your gun and nothing bad has to happen," Powell ordered steadily. "You supposedly love this woman, John; are you really going to put ending my life at a higher priority than saving hers? Maybe you're more like Todd than you care to admit."

"He's bluffing," Todd snorted.

"Dad, please, don't," Starr begged as Powell's eyes narrowed, nervously wringing her hands. So, apparently her inability to keep her mouth shut and not say things that pissed criminals off came from him.

"I just sat through a ten hour speech about how Powell is never going to let anyone hurt Marty again," Todd snapped at John. "He's not going to touch her."

"_Dad!_ Don't, you're-"

"No, Starr, it's okay, your father's right. Poor Marty has been through more than enough, I shouldn't be lowering myself to your dad's level and using her for my own purposes, it's wrong. I'm so sorry, Marty."

Starr stared at him with wide, stunned eyes as Powell rather calmly walked to the bed, still dragging Marty in front of him in the chair, then pressed the blade right to Todd's throat instead. Todd stared him down evenly, but Starr gasped in fear, tears of panic piercing her eyes.

"It's okay, Starr," her father tried to soothe her, keeping his eyes trained on Powell.

"No, Todd, it's really not. See, you're right, I won't hurt Marty…but I certainly have no qualms about hurting you. So, John, unless you'd like to me to slit Todd's throat right now and defeat the purpose of your little rescue mission, I suggest you walk over here and hand me that gun."

John hesitated, looking between Marty and Todd with a conflicted expression, and Powell slowly began to push the knife deeper.

"_John!_" Starr shrieked.

John instantly dropped the gun to his side and stormed over to Powell, his eyes burning with hatred; Starr wasn't sure if it was directed more at Powell or her father.

"Wise choice," Powell congratulated, accepting the gun with one hand so he could keep the knife on Todd.

He now pointed it directly at John's head, and Starr shrank back, her mind reeling; John and her dad were both inches away from being killed, and something was seriously wrong with Marty, the woman practically seemed comatose; it seemed she was on her own here, at least for now.

"Why don't you take your _wife's_ seat, John?" Powell suggested, nodding to one of the chairs with ropes on both arms and marching him over at gunpoint.

"Where _is_ Blair- and where is Tea?" John demanded roughly, doing as he was told.

"I offered the women a chance to save themselves from the monster that has dictated their lives for so many years, and they chose not to take it- _Tea_ chose to repay me for offering my help by attempting to kill me," he spat. "I no longer had any use for them."

"Oh my God!" Starr cried before she could stop herself, almost doubling over- what did that mean? "What did you do to them, Powell, what did you do to my mom?"

"I make no promises about Tea, but your mother is fine, Starr- I simply relocated them when they made their choice."

Starr allowed herself just a moment of relief that at least her mother was fairly safe for now, then quickly processed the news. It sounded like Tea was hurt, and that meant even once Schuyler managed to find them, he was going to have to help her- meaning he wouldn't be coming back up here for a long time. Everyone else in the room was tied up, and she could not count on Schuyler arriving at the moment she needed him this time- crap.

Powell shoved John into the chair, keeping the gun on him as he tied the ropes in knots and Starr silently crept to her father's bedside, furiously fighting the urge to panic.

"Dad, are you okay?" she whispered, kneeling beside him.

"I'm fine, sweetie," he told her softly, nervously watching Powell over her shoulder. "But you should not be here- get out now, go find help, it'll be-"

"No," she choked out, shaking her head. "I won't leave you, I can't. Dad, you need to know that I didn't mean everything I said to you, okay? You need to know that," she pleaded, tears burning her eyes. "I don't hate you at all, I never could."

"I always knew that, Starr," he said softly, giving her a slight smile. "I figured out around the fourth time you told me you hate me that you never really mean it. Now, _please_, just get out of here while you…"

Todd suddenly froze, his eyes growing wide as he looked at something over her shoulder, and a moment later Starr held a loud crack. She braced herself in dread, her stomach turning as she felt ill; it was the exact same noise she'd heard when Zach had bashed Schuyler over the head with the gun.

Already knowing what she was going to find, Starr turned on her heels and saw John unconscious in the chair, chin on his chest; Powell was still standing next to him, wiping blood of the butt of the gun with his shirt, and she gazed at him with wide, terrified eyes. Powell shrugged, carelessly tossing the gun aside.

"I didn't invite him," Powell said simply. "He knows he didn't receive an invitation. Does it bother you that he was here, Marty?" he wondered, sounding genuinely curious. "That he continues playing the role of savior for you even after he chose to marry Todd's leftovers? You deserve so much better than that," he sighed, shaking his head. Marty whimpered, low in her throat; she murmured something to herself Starr knew Powell was too far to hear- it sounded like 'don't.' "But enough about him. I'd much rather focus on you, Starr. Can you please move away from the bed?"

Starr instantly stood up and did as she was asked, returning to the center of the room and fidgeting anxiously.

"Just let her go, Powell," Todd begged. "My daughter has nothing to do with this; your problem is with me, there's no reason to involve her."

"Oh, don't pretend you actually care about your child, Todd," Powell said in disgust. "I'm not going to fall for that, it's far too late. Besides, Starr is every bit as involved as Blair was- more, actually. I was _so_ hoping to get to meet my little second cousin here; I was so disappointed that you weren't home, Starr," he addressed her directly now. "But you saved me the trouble and came to me, how kind of you."

Starr just stared at Powell in a nervous silence, watching carefully as he paced around; what the hell was she supposed to say to that? 'You're welcome? Always great to meet a new member of the family?'

"Now, Starr, I'm going to give you the same opportunity I presented to the other women. Unfortunately, I doubt you have any more gumption than your mother, but perhaps you'll prove me wrong."

He picked the knife up from where he'd placed it on the desk, now striding towards her, and Starr's heart leapt into her throat as she stumbled backwards, but it processed in the back of her mind that her father was not screaming his usual threats. What was going on? Powell stepped a few feet away from her, and to her surprise, suddenly spun the knife around, so he was carefully holding it by the blade, and to her complete disbelief, he extended the handle towards her.

"Starr, would you like to kill your father?" Powell asked brightly, the way you would ask a child if they'd like to go to the park.

Starr stared at him in a stunned silence, her jaw practically hitting the floor. What the hell was this? Was he kidding her? Testing in her some way? Was he seriously trying to offer her a knife to go to town on her father with? Who _did_ that?

"Wh…what?" Starr finally managed to choke out in shock, her head spinning.

"Do you want to kill your bastard father and finally be rid of him forever?" Powell asked again, his eyes burning as he spoke of Todd. "This is your chance- take the opportunity your mother refused! He hurts the people you love, Starr. He's hurt _you,_ time and time again. I heard all about daddy shoving you down a flight of stairs- supposedly an accident of course, but one has to wonder if he just realized it would be a good way to be rid of Marty's poor, defenseless grandchild and teach his daughter a lesson about disobeying him in the process."

"What?! No, it _was_ an accident, and he didn't even know I was pregnant, Powell!" Starr cried.

"And why is that? Were you afraid to tell him, Starr?" Powell asked quietly, his tone sympathetic. "Nobody should live in fear of their own parent. Why would you tolerate that?"

"He's not the one I'm afraid of here- I never have been," Starr said softly, backing away from the knife. Powell cocked his head, sighing heavily.

"So, that's a no?"

She nodded lamely, and for a moment, there was only tense silence in response. Powell gazed at her with great interest, taking a step closer, and this time, Starr could hear her father thrashing against the bed.

"One more step and I will _kill you_, Powell!"

Starr heard Marty emit another small whimper, still looking lost within herself, and she furrowed her brow as Powell slowly smiled again, shaking his head as he gestured to Todd.

"That's what you've grown up with, Starr. A man whose solution to everything involves bloodshed. Who threatens to get what he wants. Who lies, and rapes, and cheats, and steals, and kills. How on _earth_ could you _not_ be afraid of him? Unless…it's because you're just so similar to him. You consider yourself daddy's little girl, Starr?"

"I swear to god, Powell, if you-"

"Oh, relax, Todd, I'm not like you, I'm not going to hurt Starr; well, not if she doesn't give me a reason to, and I think Starr is smarter than that," Powell said pleasantly, smiling at Starr in a manner that didn't seem intentionally threatening and sinister the way Zach's had, just genuinely friendly. Somehow, that was even creepier. "See, Starr, you're the wildcard here, I can't get a good read on you."

"What are you talking about?" Starr asked slowly.

"You don't seem as blind to your father's behavior as his whores do, and yet, you don't do anything about it. I have to wonder what's worse; the fool who's truly blind, or the enlightened who simply _chooses_ to turn a blind eye. At the moment, I'm leaning towards the latter. He was planning to kidnap your baby, Starr! He was going to take her away from you and raise her with the incompetent, defenseless woman he was raping all over again, and you knew this. You _knew_, and yet, when the opportunity arose to finally make Todd Manning receive an ounce of the justice he deserved, to get justice for your baby and _Marty_, you _protected him._ You sat up there, took an oath and proceeded to lie in front of _God_ to save the life of a sick, demented rapist. Can you explain that to me?"

Starr bowed her head, pressing her lips together in a firm line as he berated her, struggling to give away no emotions, and slowly shook her head.

"Powell, I'm literally begging you- _please_, let Starr-"

"Todd," Powell cut him off, slowly and deliberately holding up the knife as his eyes flickered to Starr, his warning clear. "I will get to you soon, I promise you that, but for now, it would really be best for everyone involved if you _shut your mouth_ and let Starr and I speak." Todd paled, fear visible in his eyes, and simply nodded.

"I'm so sorry for the interruption, Starr- I'm sure you're used to that from him, though. Now, I honestly want to know- are you proud that you committed perjury for such a worthless human being? Do you feel _any_ shame or guilt for all the people who were robbed of their chance to see Todd Manning finally suffer for his crimes? Much like your father, you suffered no consequences for your actions- do you feel smug about the fact that you can break the law, do whatever you want and just get away with it, as he does? This is not rhetorical, I want an answer."

"Of course not!" Starr cried. "I'm not smug, I'm not proud! As soon as court let out, I went to the cemetery, collapsed at my baby's grave and just hugged the headstone and sobbed and told her over and over again how sorry I was, and I couldn't get back up for _hours._ I have questioned and second guessed what I did that day over and over again, and I'm still not sure I made the right choice!"

"Then why did you do it?" Powell demanded. "What kind of person commits perjury for such a heinous human being without even being sure that it's the right choice?"

"I did it because he's my dad!" Starr shouted in tears, sobs building in her throat as she silently prayed for some miniscule chance that she could get through to Powell and make him understand. "He's my _dad_, and I have loved him my whole life, and I don't know how to just turn that off, Powell, my heart doesn't work like that. You protect the people you love, you protect family, that's all I've ever known! I guess it's true that blood is thicker than water, because all I could think at that moment was 'This is your dad, and you love him' and it just overwhelmed everything else, it was all that mattered, because I do- I love you so much," she choked out to her dad, turning to face him. It may have just been a trick of the light, but she could have sworn his eyes were shining with tears.

"I love you more than anything in the world, Starr," Todd replied softly. Powell rolled his eyes.

Starr turned her head back as she cried, fearfully waiting for Powell's reaction. Powell made a 'tsk' ing noise a moment later, sighing.

"I see. Oh, Starr, you poor, poor girl," he murmured, his voice heavy with pity. She glanced up, startled, and Powell shot her an encouraging smile. "It's okay, Starr, I understand now. It's not your fault. Your father has just twisted you the same way he has Tea, Marty and Blair- but it's so much worse for you; they've all had lives outside of him, but his sick games are all you've known since _birth._"

"I don't understand," she muttered weakly, rubbing her eyes.

"I know you don't- I'm trying to help you to. Your father does not love you, Starr. He is the textbook definition of a sociopath; he is not _capable_ of love, much as you'd like to believe otherwise. He has spent your entire life manipulating you to make you love _him_, just as he has done to Tea and Blair, just as he did to Marty when the opportunity arose, and once he succeeded, he began using _his_ supposed love as a weapon. I'm sure he pulled off some pitiful performance for you before the trial, pretending to feel guilty because he knew it would tug your heartstrings."

Starr involuntarily thought back to that day at the graveyard, how regretful her father had seemed, the promise he'd made to be worthy of her love again someday, and could not help reflecting that he had never come through on that promise, that she'd never really seen that regret again after the trial.

"And when you upset him, he takes his 'love' away, and only gives it back once you break down and do what he wants. Isn't that right, Starr? For God's sake, it's like you're a dog in training and his love is the treat- he makes you beg for it, perform for it, and withholds it when you don't live up to his standards, only giving it to you when you fall in line."

She did not respond, but yet again, the thought crossed her mind that it was exactly what he'd done time and time again when she'd been with Cole, or after he'd discovered she was going to give Hope away. Starr furiously shook her head, feeling sick with herself for these thoughts; why was she letting a completely psychopath who had hated her father for years get to her so easily? Why was she just _letting_ Powell play family therapist here?

"I, for one, find it despicable, and I intend to free all of the women in Todd Manning's life from his control, one way or another. But I don't want to just save you, I want _you_ to take your power back!" Powell shouted eagerly, starting to sound excited. "You know I'm right, I can see it in your eyes. Don't tolerate it anymore! Blair and Tea were too far gone, they couldn't do it even after how he's made them suffer, but I have to believe there is still hope for you, Starr. Prove me right," he whispered, offering her the knife once again. "Show him that you'll never be victimized by him again."

"Murder is not justice, Powell," Starr pleaded for him to understand, shaking her head. "You don't end violence by killing someone. My dad has done wrong, I'm so not denying that, but he doesn't deserve to die for it, and I'm certainly not going to kill him."

"Look at what you've done to your daughter, Todd. She's so weak- she won't free herself from you because she doesn't even understand that she's a prisoner," Powell hissed, eyes narrowing as he gazed at Starr. "You seem to be as useless as your mother- maybe you should join her."

"Powell, you hurt her and I swear to God-"

"See, you keep saying that, Todd- don't hurt Starr, don't hurt Marty!- but you've hurt these women more than anyone else ever has."

"You hurt Marty too, Powell," Todd reminded him tightly, relieved the attention was back on him instead of Starr and pushing it to keep it that way.

"You pushed me into it. I didn't want to hurt her. _You_ pushed me into it. You and Zach told me I wasn't a man."

"You're still not a man, are you?" Todd snorted dismissively. "Look at you -- big tough guy threatening a seventeen year old girl."

"Shut up."

"And you're afraid to face me, alone, like a man."

"_Shut up,_" Powell repeated darkly.

"You're as weak as you were back then! As weak as you always were!" Todd shouted.

"Not anymore! I'm the one holding the knife."

"Well, then, what are you waiting for? You want to kill me? Get it over with."

"_Dad,_ no!" Starr wailed.

"You kill me, and when I'm dead, you let Starr and Marty go- that's the deal."

"_You_ don't get to make deals anymore, Todd! You are in no position to get your way anymore, you smug bastard, get that through your head! I'm in control now, not you! You will _never_ tell me what's going to happen, what to do, not _ever_ again!" Powell roared, growing red in the face. "Now, if none of these women can do what needs to done, I-"

"Powell!"

They all abruptly froze in surprise as a female's voice sang out Powell's name from downstairs; Starr didn't recognize it, and realized it had to be Rebecca. Oh, _God_, what if she had found Schuyler? The urge to give up and just cry in panic hit her greater than ever, and she forced herself to breathe and keep her cool. Schuyler was smart as hell, and between his days of drug addiction and dating her, he was an expert at sneaking around, he'd be fine, she had to trust that or she was going to lose it.

She glanced up at Powell, and was surprised to see that he looked as confused as she felt- apparently, Rebecca being here was not part of the plan.

"Come here," he grunted, yanking her over to the last vacant chair and pushing her into it, tying her wrists to the arms so tightly that it hurt- she couldn't wiggle them even an inch. "I'll be back in a minute- Todd, I suggest you not do anything stupid, and Starr, I suggest you not let your father _manipulate_ you into doing something stupid. Take this time to rethink your decision."

Powell pocketed the knife and stalked out of the room, and Todd and Starr both seemed to hold their breath until the sound of his footsteps completely faded away.

"What do we do now?!" Starr cried the second she was sure he was out of range.

She furiously tried to free herself from the ties. The force of her motion cause the stupid wheely chair to spin in circles as the rope held tight, and Starr sighed, realizing she looked like an incompetent idiot. She hated this, she hated being so helpless; if these hostage situations were going to become a regular thing, it would be nice not to feel so useless and have to just sit around and wait for her boyfriend or daddy to come to her rescue.

Giving up on that idea, she quickly managed to shoot her heels along the floor and drag the chair over to John's side as closely as possible, and she slowly exhaled in relief when she heard that he was breathing okay.

"I don't know, I don't know," Todd said quickly, straining his neck to look around the room. Starr was unnerved by the absence of his usual cool assurance. "But I have to get you two out of here. Oh, God, how am I going to do that?" he muttered to himself, sighing. "Okay, Marty…Marty," he repeated with a frown as she remained unresponsive. "_Marty!_"

Suddenly, much to Todd and Starr's shock, Marty screamed, as her head shot up and she started looking around in panic, breathing heavily.

"Marty, what the hell's-"

"Stop it!"

"Dad, what is she-"

"Zach, don't!"

"Oh my God," Starr uttered.

She fell silent now, horror twisting her stomach as she realized what was happening- Marty was relieving that night. She glanced to her dad briefly, and saw his eyes were shut, an expression of dread and shame on his face. Starr quickly averted her eyes, unable to bear seeing her father while this was happening.

"No, no. Oh God no, stop! No, help me, please!"

"Okay, Marty, listen to me," her father began, sounding eerily controlled considering the circumstances. The fact that his reaction was so minimal was how Starr knew this was affecting him greatly- the worse Todd felt, the more he swallowed it and put on a hard face. "I know you're scared, but --

"No, stop it!"

"What is it? What is going on?" Todd pressed.

Marty's head suddenly snapped up as she panted wildly, gazing around the room with a frantic look in her eyes. She finally seemed alert and aware, like she was actually there with them, and understood now that what she was seeing were only flashes of the past.

"I remember," she choked out, her voice absolutely anguished. Starr firmly pressed her lips together and kept her eyes shut as tears of disgust burned them; her father had been the one to put all that pain and fear there in her voice, and it was killing her to hear it. She couldn't imagine how much she would lose it if she had to see the pain in Marty's own eyes.

"You remember what?"

"You. I remember you raping me right here," she whispered. Starr swallowed the lump in her throat and began to cry harder though she remained silent, horrified this was actually happening. She felt so violently ill and disturbed right now.

"You remember?"

"Yes," she breathed.

"How much?"

"It… it was raining," she recalled with cloudy eyes. "Lighting and thunder. Music was blaring downstairs. I was there on the bed. I had too much to drink so I was trying to sleep it off and then the door opened. It was you, Zach, and Powell. You were all smiling at me."

Starr emitted a muffled noise of disgust, and Todd swallowed roughly, forcing himself to block his daughter out completely. One look at her would bring on an overwhelming amount of regret, shame, self-loathing- he would drown in it, and he wouldn't be able to do what _needed_ to be done now.

"You asked us to leave."

"Yes."

"And then Zach grabbed you and started dancing with you."

Starr desperately wished she could clamp her hands over her ears right now; she didn't want to hear this, God, she really, _really_ should not be hearing this. Nobody should have to listen to their father help recount the moment he raped someone- what the hell was the matter with him, why was he doing that? And she really didn't want to hear about Zach, because it brought back reminders she certainly didn't need right now of how it felt when Zach had his hands on you, when he was forcing you to him, holding you against your will. Her stomach twisted as her head ached, a violent shudder waving through her body in response to her memories from that night.

"I was dizzy," she murmured. "I was so, _so_ dizzy. I was going to be sick so I tried to… I tried to get to a phone but he wouldn't let me go." Her eyes flickered to Todd, and Marty's eyes slowly narrowed, anger flashing through them as she sat straighter and stiffer. "When I found out who you were, when I read all about it and Nora told me about it, I didn't feel it. I didn't feel it because I didn't remember, because I didn't want to," she spat.

"Remember it now," he prodded quietly.

"You _want_ me to remember what you did to me?" Marty hissed in disbelief, giving a short, infuriated laugh.

"What's wrong with you?!" Starr exploded tearfully. "Why are you pushing her to do this? Haven't you done enough?" she demanded coldly. Todd clenched his fists tightly, taking a deep breath.

"It hasn't done her any good to block it."

Marty stared at him for a moment, then slowly shook her head as her face fell.

"I'm scared," she admitted.

"I can't hurt you again. I mean, not now, I'm tied up," he remaindered her with a dark smile. "I certainly can't hurt you any more than I already have. Listen, Marty, if you want your memories back, if you want your life back, maybe this is the best way. You might as well just go for it. Just let it go. Don't fight it. You were wrong, y'know- the _last_ thing I _want_ is for you to remember what I did to you. But if you can get all those memories back, the ones I took from you, the ones that you miss, maybe those memories are waiting for you on the other side. If remembering what I did to you what helps you break through, do it. Do it and hate me. I don't care. As long as you get your life back."

Marty pursed her lips, struggling to keep a composed face even as the tears started to burn her eyes, and looked Todd square in the eyes; he was going to see what these memories did to her, like it or not.

"You threw me on the bed -- and you got on top of me." Starr's breathing grew erratic as she desperately tried to block out what she was hearing, feeling like she was on the verge of dry heaving.

"And then I told them to lock the door," Todd filled in calmly.

"And they just stood there watching," Marty said angrily, blinking rapidly as tears spilled down her cheeks. "While you pinned me down , and then _raped_ me." She slowly released a breath as her shoulders trembled. "Oh, I thought I was going to die. You were so angry."

Starr couldn't control a little flashback of her own, couldn't ignore the words ringing in her ears: _"You __**are**__ that bad person. You __**are**__ that rapist."_ It had been true then and it was true now; her dad could be a completely awful person. Starr fiercely longed for the days when it had been so easy to defend her father because she hadn't believed that; she hadn't believed he had that darkness inside of him, that he was capable of such disgusting, horrible, messed up things. She missed being blind.

And yet…knowing what she did now, even after going through _this_, it didn't change anything. She knew it was undeniable that she loved her father. She would still defend him, she knew herself too well to claim otherwise. When Powell came back, she had every intention of crying and screaming and begging for him to understand and give her dad another chance- _why?_ She had no logical reason for it; this moment should have been enough to shatter the love she felt for him, she should have stopped caring and decided right then and there that Powell could do whatever he wanted with him. Why hadn't she stopped caring? Was Powell right? Had she allowed herself to be broken down and manipulated into being this way?

"I couldn't breathe," Marty said shakily. "My head was pounding. I thought I was going to pass out.

"But you didn't."

"Uh-uh. Because I didn't want to die," Marty choked out. "I just…wanted it to stop. I wanted _you_ to stop," she said in a strangled whisper, her eyes burning as she stared Todd down.

"When I was finished, do you remember what happened then?"

"You were still holding me down," Marty continued, her voice growing stronger, fueled on by her anger. "And then you turned to Zach and Powell."

"Do you remember what I said?"

"You said…she's been dying for it," Marty spat furiously, thrashing against the chair. Starr had a feeling that if Powell were to make his offer to Marty again at this moment, she would accept in a heartbeat- Starr would not blame her for a second.

"Zach stuffed a sweatband in my mouth so I couldn't make any noise. So, I tried to go to a different place in my head. I looked around the room and I found this little stuffed lion and I just stayed there. I stayed there and I stayed there. I focused on that and went back to a place when I was young and I was innocent and I stayed there," Marty rambled frantically, everything coming out in a rush now.

Marty's gaze flickered to Starr, and she saw that the young girl's eyes were now fixed on a magic eight ball sitting on a nearby table, fixating on it the same way Marty had the lion. Starr was staring at it with a hard, unblinking gaze as she continued to struggle against the ropes and waited for this to be over; Marty questioned whether Starr even heard them anymore. She swallowed roughly and pushed on, wanting to see this through and finally get all the way to the other side.

"And then it was Powell's turn and I thought maybe he wouldn't, but he gave in…and then it was over and I couldn't move," she finished, exhaling in relief, finding it slightly easier to breathe at this moment.

"And that's when Kevin found you," Todd added quickly, needing her to remember life had continued after that moment.

"Yeah. I was so messed up I thought maybe he was there, I thought maybe he was one of _you._

"So, you went to the police and you pressed charge against all of us."

"And you went to prison and then they ended up pardoning you," Marty said, her voice dripping with disgust.

"Right, for saving your life."

"Is that how you justify that in your mind?" Starr cut in now, her voice hard and cold as her eyes never left the eight ball.

"No," Todd said firmly, gazing at his daughter helplessly before focusing on Marty again. "Marty, you know you had a good life after what happened."

"Don't," she snapped, not wanting Todd to act like that somehow made up for what he did.

"Don't stop remembering," he urged. "Come on. Here we are in Kevin's K.A.D. room, obviously for a reason."

"Yeah, because Powell's guilt drove him insane!" Marty shouted. "He wants you to suffer for it! He wants me to watch you suffer the way _you_ watched me, the way he had to, but I can't. I _can't_. I'm not built like him, like you, I could never enjoy that."

"Well don't shut down now! Not now."

"No, no, no," she hissed, wildly shaking her head. "Why do you want to hear this from me?!"

"I want you to remember what happened here so you can remember what happened after here!" Todd snapped in frustration. "I mean, your life… your life means so much more. You're _so_ much more than what happened-"

"I know!" Marty screamed, slowly taking a breath as her shoulders sagged. "I know," she repeated, quieter.

"She doesn't need her _rapist_ to remind her that she's more than her rape!" Starr yelled at her father.

"You're right, she doesn't. You know that, Marty, and I want you to tell me about it. You moved on. Where'd you go next? You went to Ireland, right? You had it out with your aunt. What's her name, Kiki? What happened to you in Ireland? Who did you meet there?" he demanded.

"Patrick," Marty answered softly, her eyes clouding over as she tilted her head thoughtfully. She suddenly took a gasping breath, tears shining in her eyes. Starr cautiously looked over, and slowly turned back to face them, curious about this part.

"That's right. Patrick, the love of your life. Do you remember how much you loved him?" Marty nodded tearfully, a joyful smile suddenly appearing on her lips, much to the surprise of Todd and Starr.

"Pretend we're lovers. Ha! Pretend we're lovers. That's what he said to me. He grabbed and he kissed me. I played along."

"But you weren't really pretending, either of you, were you?" Starr asked softly. Todd quieted down at this point, thankful Starr had jumped in; he had no business discussing how Marty had reclaimed her life with her, not when he'd been the one to steal it. It was wrong; he'd done his part and should not insert himself any longer.

"No," she said with a warm smile, looking reflective. "Y'know, I'd seen pictures… but I couldn't feel him. But now I…oh God, I loved him," Marty whispered in amazement. "God, did I love him."

Starr sniffed, smiling sadly at the pure wonder and overwhelming love in Marty's tone. She tried to think about what it would feel like if she was unable to remember her love for Schuyler only to feel it all come rushing back at once, in a great wave of emotion; even just imaging made her heart pound and swell.

"I can see how hard this is for you, Marty," Todd said as Marty bowed her head, on the verge of tears. "But it's a good thing- you remembering everything from your past…good _and_ bad."

"God gave us memory that we might have roses in December," she murmured.

"What?" Starr and Todd asked in unison, in the exact some tone of confusion. To her own surprise, Marty emitted a small laugh.

"It's a poem," she explained.

"Oh, did Patrick write it?" Todd questioned.

"No, James Barrie. It was from one of his favorite poems. He did read me a poem he wrote once. It was when we were married on Llantano Mountain. Ah, I remember that day," she said happily. "Oh, wow. Yeah, I remember, I remember the look on his face when he said I do," Marty giggled in almost hysterical joy. "So much love…_for_ him, _from_ him."

"Then you went to Ireland?" Starr prompted. Marty nodded.

"And we lived in this old cottage. It was like a fairy tale."

"Sounds like it," Starr agreed, her voice encouraging.

"And it wasn't long before I found out that I was pregnant."

"With Cole," Starr said with a smile.

"Yeah," Marty told her, grinning. She looked at Starr thoughtfully, and Starr realized she was likely remembering her and Cole's history together. "Patrick was there with me when he was born. He stayed by my side, and he held my hand. Oh, I'll never forget it. And I remember the look on his face when they put our son in his arms for the first time," she recalled with a giddy laugh. "And then he handed him to me. Oh, God, I can smell it. I remember how Cole smelled after his bath, and how he'd giggle when I kissed his belly. Oh, those precious years I had watching him grow up. Oh, wow, _wow_, I remember my son. I remember my son," she repeated with a bright grin, crying tears of joy.

"Cole's going to be so happy, Marty, you have no idea. He loves you so much, he's going to be _so happy_ you remember," Starr told her, giving her something to hold onto.

"My son… he grew up so fast. It was like he was taking his first step, and all the sudden he's playing lacrosse. And I remember the first time he told me that he loved me, arms tight around my neck. He could barely get the words out. And, you know, he never stopped saying it, even in high school. In fact, that was the last thing I remember him saying -- before the van crashed."

"You remember the crash?" Todd piped back up. She hesitantly nodded.

"John got there right away. But Cole had been thrown from the van, and so I told him to go after him. And as soon as he was gone, there was an explosion, and then everything just went… black."

"But you remember it all now," Starr reminded her before Marty could get lost in her thoughts again. "You have it all back, you remember."

Marty took a deep breath and nodded, holding herself up a little straighter as she looked at Todd, her voice strong.

"I do remember, all of it- everything _you_ tried to keep from me. You kept my whole world from me."

"Yes, I did. But you just got it back," he told her firmly. "And no one can take it away from you ever again, not me or anyone else."

"That's right," Marty said tightly. "I have my life back, and you will never take any part of it away from me again."

"See? There you go, it's over and done with now, and you're stronger for it. Now, we need to get you two out of here before…"

Todd trailed off as they heard footsteps near the door, all three occupants of the room waiting in dread; it was too late, Powell was back.

"I've got a guest," he announced his presence brightly. The door swung open, and what Starr saw when he walked into the room made her heart drop to her feet.

"_Oh my god!_" she screamed in a full blown panic, all thoughts of keeping cool or staying rational flying from her mind as she completely _lost it_; because there, in Powell's arms, was _Hope._


	24. Chapter 24

"Shh," Powell ordered softly. "You'll startle her." He cocked his head as he spoke to her, studying Starr's scared, horrified face as he noticed her watery eyes. He glared at Todd. "It took you five minutes to make her cry," Powell scoffed in disbelief. "And you- why do you let him affect you so greatly? Time to grow that backbone."

"Powell, what are you doing?!" Marty cried, in the same state as Starr.

"Answer her, Powell!" Todd thundered, in just as much of an uproar as the women over the sight of his grandchild in Powell's arms.

"Maybe she's mine," Powell said with a smirk shrugging.

"No she's not!" Starr screamed hysterically, thrashing against the ropes like crazy. She had been through absolute hell, more times than she could count, but Starr had never known worse terror than what she felt at this moment. "That's Hope; what are you doing with her?!"

"Rebecca brought me a little surprise," he told her calmly, undisturbed by the state of chaos the three of them had quickly deteriorated into.

Oh, of course; Kyle, that little bastard, had been at the lab the night they'd had Hope's DNA tested to back up Natalie and Jared's story. _That_ was what he'd told his sister about Todd that had gotten Rebecca so worked up, _that_ was why she'd gone rushing out of the house- to kidnap this poor defenseless baby whose only crime was having Manning blood in her. Starr bitterly decided she was going to kill Kyle if she didn't die tonight.

"And I must say, Starr, I'm surprised you can even recognize her after the way you threw her out without a second glance."

"Powell, what are you doing with Jessica's baby?!" Starr shrieked again.

Powell suddenly inhaled sharply, his head whipping around to gaze at Starr, and the look in his eyes made her fall silent, swallowing roughly as a chill raced through her; she had a feeling she had just said the worst thing possible.

"Whose baby, Starr?" he asked, his voice deathly quietly.

"Powell, Starr and the baby don't-"

"Todd, I am asking your daughter a question, and she needs to answer me _right now._ What did you just say, Starr?"

"I…I asked what you were doing with Jessica's baby," she repeated softly, unable to tear her eyes away from Hope. To her relief, the little girl didn't seem frightened.

"I thought so," he choked out, shaking his head. "I should have known better than to think there was any more of a chance for you than your father. A little whore too, just like your mother- you got the worst qualities from both of them, you've always been a disaster waiting to happen."

"Shut your _mouth_, Powell," Todd hissed. "I swear to God, if you touch one hair on Hope or Starr's head, I will kill you- as slowly as humanly possible."

Powell ignored him, turning to look to the other woman with a sympathetic, strangely protective gaze.

"Can you believe this, Marty?" he demanded.

"What are you talking about, Powell?" she asked slowly, trying to placate him.

"The Mannings have no right to ever go near your family, but you and Cole gave this one a chance, you let her in and trusted her, far more than she ever deserved. And then, she got pregnant, and she was carrying _your granddaughter._ The first grandchild you ever got to have. This baby shares it's filthy Manning blood with yours- it was their chance for redemption, a far greater gift than they deserve. And what did Starr do with that chance, that gift? She threw it away! She gave the child to the first person who would take it. And then, when _Jessica_, another Todd in the making stole the child that is _rightfully yours_, Starr _let her._"

"You know nothing about this situation, you psychotic bastard," Todd spat.

"Hmm, well, I know I left out the best part, Todd. _You_ were going to kidnap the child to further the sick, sick lie you were living with Marty, and going to just let your own daughter think that her baby was dead. Looks like _you're_ the one who's insane."

"Rich, coming from you."

"Fair enough; I guess it runs in the family. Victor and Powell Sr. spawned a whole new generation of nuts," he remarked, glancing between Todd and Starr. "It's too bad, though, that you'll never get to know whether this little one got the crazy gene, too," he murmured, patting Hope lightly on the back.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Todd demanded as Starr emitted a strangled gasp of terror. "What the hell do you think you're going to do to her?!"

"Oh, _now_ you care about this baby? Don't want anything to happen to her? I bet Starr felt that way when she was pregnant- didn't you, Starr?"

"Yes!" Starr instantly told him, her voice panicked. "And I feel that way _now_ Powell, _please!_"

"But you didn't care about that, did you, Todd?" Powell asked in a voice cold as ice, tuning out Starr. "You were going to steal her and just _use_ her like you do everyone in your life; she was just a solution to you, a way to start your own little family with poor Marty, so don't suddenly pretend you actually care about her now, it's far too late," he spat. "This baby was your final chance at redemption, Todd, and surprise surprise, you threw that chance away and spit on it."

"You can give me that chance back, Powell," Todd pleaded. "Just untie me, and give me my granddaughter, and we can just talk about-"

"You actually think I'm going to let you touch this child ever again? What did I _just say_, Todd? You're _too late._ This baby _was_ going to be your salvation…but now she's mine," he murmured.

"Powell, _please_ don't hurt her, _please._ I haven't done anything to you, and I am begging you for just this _one_ thing, _please_," Starr sobbed. Powell looked at her sharply.

"You haven't done anything to me personally, no, but you're from an innocent in this situation, that much has become obvious tonight, Starr, and I owe you _nothing_," he hissed.

"I know, I know!" she assured him frantically. "I'm sorry."

"This baby doesn't have to pay for our mistakes, Powell," Todd cried.

"A _mistake?_ Running away with Marty and this baby would have been a mere _mistake?_ You are so sick, Todd, you consider that a simple mistake while I feel ill everytime I think of what you tried to do- run off with the two people who couldn't remember the past. It would have been like it never happened, wouldn't it? But it _did_ happen. Right here in this room. You had the power then. You told me what to do to Marty and I listened. And I lost everything. My freedom, my sanity, my life, all because of you. But now I've got the power, Todd. Right here. In this little girl."

"You're right, Powell. I did have all the power back then," Todd agreed.

"You admit it?" he asked in surprise.

"Yes, and I used it to control you, and I ruined your life," he continued, desperate to say anything Powell wanted to hear.

"So what? You think that's going to save you?" he asked irritably.

"No, nothing can save me now, just like nothing can save you or Zach," Todd sighed.

"We only did it because of you," Powell reminded him defensively.

"Right. So punish _me_. Do whatever you want to me, but leave that baby alone, please."

Powell gazed at him heavily, his eyes dark as he continued to lightly bounce Hope against his hip, rubbing her back; the sight of him touching Hope made Starr want to claw his eyes out.

"I don't believe you," he finally replied.

"What?"

"Not that I don't enjoy hearing you beg, but there's something about the way you're saying it, I just… I don't buy it," he informed him simply, flashing an almost apologetic smile as he shrugged.

"Powell! Damn it, don't do this -- don't do it like this! Don't use Marty or Starr or Blair or Tea or that child to get back at _me_!

"This has nothing to do with getting back at you, Todd!" Powell yelled. "Not everything is about you, hard as that may be for you to believe! All I intend to do with this baby is make sure she can't be ruined by this family the one that one has been," he sat, jabbing his thumb over his shoulder at Starr. Starr shivered, recognizing around her fear for Hope that it wasn't good Powell had decided she was 'ruined.' "I would never hurt this child. The only reason you thought that is because it's something _you_ would do," he said, voice dripping with disgust. "And that makes it very clear that you're right, Todd. I can't save you. Nobody can be saved," he remarked sadly, shaking his head with great disappointment.

"That not true," Marty spoke up softly, forcing herself to gaze at Powell with warmth in her eyes. "You saved _me_."

"What do you mean?"

"Isn't that what you were trying to do all those years ago, Powell -- you were trying to save me? Isn't that what you're trying to do right now?"

"No, stop it, stop, Marty," Powell requested, wildly shaking his head about as he took a breath. "This is between Todd and me, and I'm doing this for you!"

"I know that, I know," she cooed. "And he _made_ you hurt me back then, but you've fixed it now. You fixed it, you saved me."

"I hurt you, I can't save you," he disagreed miserably.

"You already did!" she insisted. "You already did; I got my memory back, all of it. And it would never have happened without you. I remembered everything tonight, and it's all because of you."

"Me?"

"Yes. You brought me here. And seeing all of this, it… it triggered something.

"You remembered what we did to you in this room?" he asked in shame, bowing his head.

"Not just that," Marty said quickly. "I remembered everything. My whole life came back to me, all of it. My _son_…you gave that back to me. And for that, I thank you," she told him, pasting a smile onto her lips."

Powell swallowed roughly and took a deep breath, gazing at Marty emotionally.

"Marty? I never meant to hurt you," he told her weakly.

"I know," she replied quietly.

"For so long, I've been wanting to make it up to you. I'd do anything for you- _anything_," he said forcefully, his voice trembling.

"Okay, okay… then give me back the baby, please. Give me my granddaughter, Powell," Marty pleaded, her voice gentle and sincere. Powell shook his head, tearing up and Todd and Starr watched the exchange with baited breath. "You want to make it up to me? If you want to make it up to me, you can do it right now. You gave me back my life- let me share it with my grandchild, please. You're right, she is rightfully mine, so just let me have her, please."

"I'm sorry," he told her, his rocking motion growing rougher. Hope wrinkled her face, beginning to cry, and Starr furiously tugged at the ropes again. "I'm sorry."

"I know, I know, and it's okay now. It's okay," she repeated her reassurance several more times.

Powell slowly walked over, kneeling beside Marty, and fished the knife out of his pocket, balancing Hope in the other arm. He opened the blade, cut through the ties on one of Marty's arms, then carefully transferred Hope to her. Marty protectively cradled Hope to her chest with her free arm, slowly exhaling as Powell stood up and backed away. Todd and Starr both seemed to crumple with relief; they were not in the clear yet, but Hope's safety was all that mattered right now.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Powell wept to Marty again, his body tense as he seemed on edge. Marty kept her attention on Hope, pressing a kiss to her granddaughter's forehead as she murmured to her quietly, trying to comfort the still crying child.

"It's okay, everything's fine. It's okay, sweetie, you're safe."

"Thank you, Powell," Todd said weakly, his shoulders sagging.

"Thank you _so_ much," Starr chimed in.

Powell inhaled sharply, the tears abruptly drying up as he glanced back and forth between Todd and Starr with cold, narrowed eyes.

"Thank you? _Thank you?_ You think I did this for you?" he asked, his voice quiet with rage as he positively seethed, his shoulders beginning to shake violently. Starr shrank back against the chair fearfully, realizing she and her father had just made a huge mistake.

"Take it easy," Todd said quietly, averting his eyes submissively, even as it killed him to do so. "No, I don't think-"

"You can't be happy, neither of you. You can't be happy, not about this, not about anything!" he roared, exploding with fury as he snapped right before their eyes, his calm, unnerving control disappearing. He waved the knife around wildly as he spoke, and Todd watched him carefully.

"Put the knife down, Powell. It's over!"

"It'll never be over!"

"No, _you_ ended it. You just did the right thing."

"Why do you get to decide what's right?" he hissed.

"Powell, it's over because you've made up for everything you did all those years ago!"

"Oh, so I just leave and you get to run off and live happily ever after with Marty, with your grandchild, and Starr gets to learn that just like her daddy, she'll never face any consequences for the stunts she pulls?!" he demanded, stalking over to the bed, gripping the knife so tightly that the blood disappeared from his fingers. Starr's heart leapt to her throat as she watched with wide, terrified eyes.

"No, that's not what I'm-"

"Neither of you gets to be happy about _anything_!" Powell roared, dropping to his knees beside Todd on the bed. "Not ever, not after all that you've done! Not about Marty, not about the baby, nothing! You're right," he hissed, raising the knife. "It's over."

"Powell, no!" Marty shrieked as Powell raised the knife, seconds before he brought it plunging down into Todd's chest.

Starr's scream was earsplitting, and Marty's was not far behind; between them and Todd's own shout of pain, Hope screeched and cried even louder, and the noise in the room rose to deafening levels.

Powell pulled the knife out as the girls continued screaming at him desperately. Starr could see the blood pouring from her father's chest as his body went limp, and her heart felt like ice as it dropped to her stomach; her head pounded frantically with panic. Powell raised his hand as if to stab him again, and Starr snapped, losing all inhibition or sense of control.

"Powell!" Starr yelled as cold tears splashed down her cheeks; she found herself completely unable to tear her eyes from her father's bloody, unmoving form, and it made her cry harder, scream louder. Powell turned to face her, his eyes dark but face expressionless. "You bastard!" she wailed. "What is wrong with you?!"

"Starr, don't!" Marty cried. Powell climbed off the bed, slowly approaching her, the knife still covered in her father's blood dangling from his fingers. "Powell, stop!"

"My father has to pay for what he _made_ you do? That's bullshit!" she screeched furiously. "You are no better than him, Powell! He didn't _force_ you into anything, you made a _choice_! What the hell is wrong with you and Zach?! My father has done horrible things, but at least he acknowledges it, at least _he_ doesn't try to pin it on someone else like you!"

"Oh, and that makes him so much better than me, right Starr?! You're trying to justify the unforgivable, like father like daughter! I should have known you would be just like him," he spat. "I should have known you were every bit as heartless as your dad when you gave up Marty's grandchild to the woman who _stole her_, just so you wouldn't have to grow up! Just like your father!" he yelled again, slamming his hands to the arms of the chair and getting in her face. "You can have the fun but you won't face the consequences!"

"_You_ have no room to talk about consequences!" Starr shot back, standing her ground and ignoring Marty's cries for her to back down. "You have spent your entire life since that night passing the blame so you don't have to face the fact that you're even _worse_ than my father, so you don't have to shoulder any responsibility!"

"I will not be lectured about _responsibilities_ by the girl who gave that poor child, her family's only shot at redemption, away to a deranged, psychopathic woman. God, you just _accepted_ that she _kidnapped_ your child and signed the papers to make the abduction permanent! What is so _wrong_ in your _head_ that you think that's okay, Starr?! You are seventeen- how are you already so severely damaged?!" he shouted in infuriation, before slowly taking a deep breath, beginning to return to his controlled state.

"I truly wanted to save you from your father, just as I want to save Marty, but I'm afraid it might be too late for you," Powell sighed. "You might just be broken beyond repair after everything this sick bastard has done to you. I don't know if this…" he brushed his hand across the top of her head. Starr shuddered, vaguely aware of Marty yelling at Powell not to touch her. "is fixable."

He smiled sadly, looking like an uncle gazing at his favorite niece as he twirled the knife in his hand, lightly singing to himself.

"And all the king's horses and all the king's men…you know the rest," he finished softly. "I don't think I or anyone else can put you back together again, Starr. But I can't just…let you leave," he informed her, lightly resting the blade of the knife against her forearm. Starr could feel the cold steel even through the sleeve of her shirt, and shivered violently, trying to swallow her terror. "I didn't come here to rid the world of Todd Manning just so his offspring could grow up to be him and start this disgusting cycle all over again. Your mother is a selfish, cruel, irresponsible little slut as well- you never had a chance, did you? You were _destined_ to end up this way- your very _blood_ is tainted," he hissed, slowly pushing the blade deeper to her arm and dragging it downwards.

Starr screamed as he drew blood, barely able to hear Marty's hysterical shouts, begging and threatening all at once, around the pounding noise in her ears, as the terror she'd been trying so hard to contain came rushing out in a great wave as she saw the red liquid trailing down her skin.

"Get away from her!"

Powell abruptly jerked away from her, straightening up and stumbling back as all three of them quickly looked to the doorway at the sound of the new voice, and Starr's jaw dropped at the sight of Jessica and Brody barreling into the room. Brody, the one who had called out, had seen what was going on first and already processed, but Jessica suddenly froze dead in her tracks at the sight of Starr, bleeding and tired to the chair, John unconscious behind her, then glanced the other way and gasped in horror at the sight of Todd, now also unconscious and rapidly bleeding out, and finally, her baby, wailing in Marty's embrace.

"Who the _hell_ are you, and what the _hell_ are you doing with my baby and the rest of my family?" she hissed, as Brody dashed across the room to Starr's side, quickly falling to his knees in front of her so they were eye to eye.

"Jessica, that's Powell Lord- he's been behind all the murders in town, he brought my parents here tonight because he wanted to kill my dad!" Starr cried. Jessica's eyes widened in recognition.

"Oh, God," she murmured softly.

"Starr, you're bleeding; what happened, where are you hurt?" Brody asked urgently, keeping her attention on him as Powell and Jessica began screaming back and forth about the family's wrongdoings and who Hope belonged with. He kept a protective stance in front of her, though he also kept turning to keep a watchful, worried eye on Jessica and Hope.

"Um, my arm, I think it's okay, it doesn't hurt so much anymore," Starr stuttered nervously, unable to take her eyes off of her cousin.

"And John?"

"Just knocked out; he's breathing fine, I checked."

Brody quickly pushed her ripped sleeve up, examining the cut she was bleeding from, and Starr swallowed roughly, shooting him a wild eyed gaze.

"Brody, I don't understand what's going on, what are you and Jessica doing here?" she whispered.

"We went into Hope's room to check on her only to discover that she was gone," Brody replied quietly, his shoulders tense as he recalled that heart-stopping moment.

He slowly clenched his fists, rage creeping into the corner of his mind as he thought about how the man responsible for the kidnapping of the child Brody considered _his_ daughter in all ways but blood was right behind him, threatening and spewing hateful words at the woman he loved. He slowly took a breath and forced himself to shake it off; giving into rage had never done him any favors, and Jess could handle herself- one of the many things he loved about her. Starr needed his help more now.

He quickly shrugged his jacket off, tearing off a sleeve, and wrapped it tightly around her bleeding arm as a temporary bandage before continuing the explanation.

"Thank God we noticed a car speeding away from the house in time to follow it. We lost it a few times but managed to find our way here, and we saw the car parked out front and knew Hope had to be here."

"Oh, God, Brody, Rebecca- um, the girl who kidnapped Hope- is still in the house somewhere," she told him frantically. "What if she-"

"She's not a problem," Brody told her, smiling tightly as he finished tying the sleeve. "She attacked us when we first came into the house and Jess knocked her out."

"Did you guys see Schuyler when you were coming in too?" she asked desperately, scared that she hadn't seen any sign of him yet.

"Who's Schuyler?" Brody asked in confusion.

"Nevermind," she mumbled, disheartened as she anxiously continued to watch Jessica and Powell.

She realized after a moment they were both edging towards Marty, and thus, Hope, and swallowed nervously, frightened tears piercing her eyes. She had no idea if Schuyler and her mom were okay, Powell didn't seem done terrorizing them yet, and her dad…oh, God, her dad. Her eyes flickered to him reluctantly, and a sob tore from her lips as she saw the blood pooling around him, how still he was; Starr gasped for breath as her tears began to spill more rapidly and she realized she was starting to lose it again.

"Hey, Starr, it's okay," Brody murmured reassuringly, misunderstanding her panicked behavior. "Jessica and I are _not_ about to let anything happen to Hope, and you're gonna be fine, the cut's shallow, okay? I just-"

"No, Brody…my dad," she said weakly. Brody nodded in grim understanding, not making her any false promises that Todd would be okay.

"Alright, I need you to listen to me, Starr," he told her, pulling out a pocketknife and sawing through the ropes. Starr sighed in relief, flinching when she saw she'd rubbed her skin raw, and cradled her injured arm to her chest. "Jessica and I are going to take care of Powell; while we're handling him, I need you to get to your father and try to stop the bleeding, alright?" he asked, handing her the pocketknife so she could cut Todd loose.

"Okay," she said quickly, accepting it as she sniffled and pulled herself together. "Oh, Brody, listen, Powell knocked John out with his gun and then threw it aside, it's gotta be somewhere by John still- in case you need it, or he starts to go over there, you know what he's doing."

"Got it," he said, nodding, as they both turned their attention back to Powell and Jessica.

"Powell, look," Jessica began softly, apparently having decided to switch tactics. "Right now, you're screwed, you have to see that. You're not getting away with this one, Powell. And when the cops show up, you're going to jail for numerous attempted murders and even more successful ones, several kidnappings, and probably a ton of other smaller charges- you're going to die in a prison cell, and you won't have changed a thing, you won't have helped anyone. But if you just walk away and leave us alone now, we can all forget this happened and you can get away; you were just trying to help, we know that, we can let you go. Please, Powell."

"You're right- I _am_ trying to do the right thing, which is why I will _never_ let you touch this baby again," he hissed. "You only have this child because you had a psychotic break and abducted her- what makes you think you have any right to her after that?"

"I am her _mother_, Powell. The way she came to me is awful, I'm not denying that, but we have bonded, and she knows me as her mom; we love each other, we're a family, and you have no right to interfere in that!"

"_You_ have no right to pass your kidnapping victim off as _your_ baby! Marty is the only one who deserves this child, and I will never let this family steal Hope from her again!"

"Powell, I know you're trying to protect me again, and I appreciate that so much, but I don't want you to do this," Marty told him gently, trying to appeal to his softer side. She had to speak up to be heard over Hope's crying, and Starr could see how it physically pained Jessica and Brody to see their daughter so scared and be unable to do a thing about it. Powell looked to Marty in confusion, a conflicted look in his eyes. "Jessica isn't my enemy, she's my _friend_, and I know she's a good mother. She can't help what her alter did, anymore than you can help what you did to me that night, but she loves her now, and she's all Hope knows. Please, understand that you're not helping me by trying to tear them apart."

"Marty…Marty, no!" Powell cried, cradling his head as, to Starr's shock, tears suddenly pierced his eyes. He looked back up with a manic glint in his eyes, and Starr knew there was no doubt Powell had officially lost the last little bit of sanity he'd been clinging to. "You're better than this! How could you let them fool you? She's not your friend, she's just manipulating you, and you're _letting_ her, just like you let the Mannings! I want to help you, Marty, but you won't _let me!_ And you obviously can't be trusted with her if it's _Jessica's_ best interests you have at heart!" he spat, abruptly closing the distance between them and yanking Hope away from Marty.

"Get your hands off of her!" Brody exploded as Jessica screamed in outrage as well; Brody leapt up to stand beside Jess, and Starr took advantage of the moment to bolt to Todd.

She carefully climbed up beside her father, trying not to jolt the bed so she wouldn't cause her dad to move and make the blood spill out more rapidly. Her knees were instantly soaked in the blood that had already poured from the wound, and Starr felt a lump swell in her throat as she choked back her horror, the sounds of the other four in the room completely fading away as Todd became the only thing she could focus on.

She took a deep, steadying breath and carefully moved his jacket aside, locating the exact spot where he'd been stabbed; her stomach churned as she found it, and a sob once again escaped her as she forced herself not to look away. She didn't really know what to look for in this situation, but she noticed the wound seemed straight and narrow enough, clean, not jagged or rough; she prayed that meant something good.

"Dad," she whimpered as she pressed both of her hands tightly against the wound. She could feel his blood pulsing against her skin, and she cringed, biting her lip in frustration as small trails of it seeped through her fingers. "Dad, please wake up, please, please don't die," she begged. "Hold on for me, okay? And if not for me, for _yourself._ You're better than this, and you know it, you know this isn't how you want to go out- don't you dare let Powell win and get what he wants, _please._"

Suddenly, numerous shouts, a terrified cry from Hope, and the sound of bodies hitting the floor as a scuffle began broke through Starr's wall of concentration. Careful to not let her hands move the slightest bit, Starr awkwardly managed to crane her neck enough to see what was going on. Powell and Brody were rolling on the floor, locked in an intense struggle, and Jessica was hugging Hope tightly to her chest, crying tears of relief as she frantically kissed Hope over and over again, repeatedly telling her daughter how much she loved her and how scared she'd been. Starr realized Brody must have lunged Powell, forcing him to release Hope, and Jessica had caught her in time.

Brody managed to pin Powell beneath him and slammed his fist hard to his face, and Starr turned back around, assuming it was finally coming to an end. Jessica hurried over to Marty's side, still holding Hope tightly in one arm, and began to fumble with the ties around her other arm.

"Starr, how's Todd?" Jessica asked urgently.

"I…I don't know," Starr confessed tearfully. "He's not waking up and it seems like he's bleeding so much, and I'm so scared, Jessica."

"Hey, we're gonna get the paramedics here and he'll be just fine, sweetie, don't freak out; you're doing good, just keep it together."

Jessica managed to get the knots undone a minute later, and Marty looked at her gratefully, massaging her sore wrist for a second before grabbing the pocketknife where Starr had dropped it and cutting Todd loose. Jessica gave a tight smile and just nodded as Marty thanked her, hugging Hope tight once again and nuzzling her shoulder, breathing in her scent deeply.

A moment later, a door downstairs slammed loudly, and the three women startled, exchanging a tense, fearful look until a moment later, a voice called out.

"Starr?!"

"Oh, God," Starr choked out, crumpling as a wave of relief overwhelmed her as she finally heard her boyfriend's voice. Starr realized from the fear and panic in his tone that the sounds of a fight and the sight of Rebecca's unconscious body had to be worrying him, and she quickly responded, desperate to see him and desperately needing his help. "Schuyler! _Schuyler!_" she shrieked hysterically, waiting for him to just follow her voice.

"Schuyler?" Jessica asked slowly, furrowing her brow. "As in Joplin? What is your biology teacher doing he-"

Jessica was suddenly cut off by a loud thud from behind them, and the trio all whipped around to see that Powell had managed to kick Brody off of him. Before Brody could recover, Powell seized him by the neck and violently slammed his head into the metal leg of the desk.

"Brody!" Jessica wailed.

She quickly started to hand Hope back to Marty, intending to rush in and help, but Powell was already scrambling to his feet and moving. He scooped up the knife from where it had been flung during their struggle, lunged for the bed, and, before any of the women could do a thing, seized a fistful of Starr's hair and yanked her towards him. Starr screamed, both from the pain and seeing her father's blood begin to flow again as Powell tore her away, but abruptly went quiet as Powell placed the knife to her throat. She pressed her lips together tightly, crying silent tears of dread, knowing it would only take Powell a split second to kill her now.

"You know what? You're right, Jessica- I probably won't get away with this. But I can make sure you all pay for your crimes before I pay for mine."

"Powell, no, don't do this!" Marty cried desperately. Powell grit his teeth and simply shook her head.

"I _have_ to do this…and it looks like I'll be starting with Todd's mini-me."

He started to push the knife harder against her throat and Starr braced herself in terror, waiting for the pain as she heard Jessica and Marty shriek, and, to her horror, instantly recognized the sound of Schuyler's terrified, infuriated, and hysterical voice as he arrived in the doorway and could only bellow '_No!'_ in response to what he was seeing. Oh, God, Schuyler shouldn't have to see this- he _couldn't._

As it turned out, there was nothing for him to see, for Starr to be so afraid of; just as she tightly screwed her eyes shut, and she felt the blade pierce her skin and draw blood, a gunshot suddenly rang out. Starr's eyes flew open as the weight of the knife and the pressure on her hair disappeared, and she whipped around to see Powell lifeless on the floor, bleeding from a gunshot wound, and Brody, standing near John and holding his still smoking gun. Starr's hands flew to her neck, and she frantically felt her skin, releasing a shuddering, tearful breath when she felt that Powell only had time to draw the tiniest pinprick of blood, that she was okay afterall.

A split second later, Schuyler came dashing over, gently swept her off the bed, and crushed his arms around her in a hug tight enough to crack some ribs. Starr quickly threw a glance behind her at her father, saw Marty had taken her place, holding her hands over Todd's wound, and allowed herself a moment to just crumple into Schuyler's embrace and cling to him for dear life.

Schuyler was rambling frantically but between how quickly he was speaking and the current noise in the room, with Hope screeching again, Jessica and Brody speaking to each other rapidly and loudly, and Marty desperately trying to get Todd to wake up, Starr could barely understand a word of it- she only managed to catch 'I'm never leaving you again', several 'I love yous' and numerous death threats directed at Powell.

He pulled back slightly after a moment to look her over, and froze, appearing horrified, worried, and enraged all at once by the sight of the blood caking her jeans and the bloody fabric wrapped around her arm.

"Starr, what the _hell_ did he-"

"It's not mine, most of it's not mine," she said quickly, still frantically feeling her throat up and down. "This is why I was screaming for you; Schuyler, it's my dad," she choked out simply, nodding to the bed. Schuyler peered around her and inhaled sharply, his eyes dark, and he turned back to Starr with a focused, urgent look.

"What happened?"

"Powell stabbed him!" Starr cried, wringing her bloody hands. "And he was bleeding for a while before I could get to him and try to cover the wound, it looks like so much came out, and he's completely out, and I don't know what to do for him, so _you_ have to do something, Schuyler, please! I know you have every reason to hate him and want him dead, I don't blame you for that, he completely deserves that for what he's done to your family, but he's my dad and I love him, and you almost became a doctor so you actually might know what you're doing, and I just need you to try to help him, _please,_" Starr begged as she rambled frantically, cradling her throbbing head. Schuyler pried her hands out of her hair, looking at her intensely.

"Hey, you don't even have to ask, you should know that," he said quietly, before turning his attention to Todd, carefully climbing onto the bed beside him. "I need a credit card."

Brody, who had been staring at Powell's limp body with a strangely conflicted, heavy expression, snapped to attention and quickly fished one out of his pocket, handing it over. Marty scooted away from Todd and off the bed over to Jessica, and both women shot Starr a mystified look, though Marty's expression was hardening as she recalled what Cole had told her about Starr and Schuyler.

Starr cautiously clambered up next to Schuyler, ready to assist if she was needed, and watched curiously as Schuyler held the credit card over her father's wound instead of using his hands as she had; she saw that it eliminated the problem she'd had with the blood escaping through her fingers.

"Smart," she said softly, nodding to the card.

"It creates a seal- keeps the blood in but also keeps the air out so we don't risk a collapsed lung," he explained quickly. "Spreads the pressure and the blood out evenly too. Okay, I need to get his chest elevated- Starr, can you support his side and help me sit him up? Lean him towards you once we get him up."

"Okay," she said nervously, doing as he said. Schuyler hesitated once they had him up, looking around the room like he was searching for something.

"What, what's wrong?"

"I'm trying to think of some way we can get him out of the house without moving his body around too much and speeding up the process."

"Wait, get him out?" Jessica asked anxiously, soothingly rubbing Hope's back now that she'd gotten her to calm down. "Why? I thought you were supposed to keep them as still as possible until paramedics came."

"Usually, but unfortunately, we don't have time to wait- there's a gas leak in the basement, and I don't know how long it's been there," he informed them grimly. Jessica gasped softly, looking to Brody.

"You said you thought you smelled something weird when we first came into house, it must have been leaking for a while for you to already smell it from up here. He's right, we have to go."

"The basement? Oh my God, my mom!" Starr cried, ashamed of herself for taking so long to ask about her even though she knew logically it was no wonder, considering what they were dealing with. "Is that where you found her? _Did_ you find her, is she-"

"Your mom is completely fine, Starr, I promise," Schuyler quickly reassured her. "Yes, I found her and Tea in the basement. She was nearly passed out when I got to her, a little roughed up and completely exhausted, but she was conscious and talking when I carried her out and she seemed okay."

"And Tea?"

"Tea…needs to get to a hospital," Schuyler replied hesitantly, not wanting to scare her. "I already called 911, they should be here soon, so she'll be alright. But we need to have your dad waiting for the ambulance too, out of this house," he sighed, looking around once more. He focused in on something, his eyes lighting up with an idea. "We can put him in one of the chairs! I can hold him steady to the chair and keep him from moving a lot less than if we just carried him."

"Good idea," Brody agreed, grabbing the chair Starr had been in and wheeling over. He paused as he reached Powell's side and had to steer around him, swallowing roughly as he looked sick to his stomach.

"Guys…what do we do about them?" he asked quietly.

"What are you talking about?" Jessica asked him in confusion.

"They're not dead yet- Powell and Rebecca. What do we do with them?" Brody asked, his tone deeply conflicted.

"Leave them," Schuyler snapped instantly.

Starr glanced to her boyfriend in surprise. She'd been waiting for someone to ask that question, but she'd been expecting him to take the opposite side from her, to say they shouldn't play God and should take them with them for the police to deal with. Frankly, she was glad he said what she was thinking. Starr was all about forgiveness and second chances most of the time, but she had enough Manning in her to feel that sometimes, people needed to get what they deserved, and the sight of her father struggling for life was proof that being left in the house as the gas leaked out was exactly what these two had coming.

"My thoughts exactly," Jessica snorted, rolling her eyes dismissively. "Screw them." Brody hesitated, appearing uncomfortable, and Jessica softened with understanding, reaching out to squeeze his hand. "Brody, he's not an innocent; you had to shoot him to save Starr, and we just don't have time to waste now saving a murderer, this says nothing about _you_."

Starr was confused for a moment, then suddenly recalled what Jessica had once told her about Brody's past and gasped, sympathy rushing through her; she knew that after the incident that had caused his PTSD in the first place, Brody had to be incredibly reluctant to ever take another life, even indirectly.

"I just don't know if it's our place to-"

Schuyler impatiently reached out with his free hand and seized Starr's; he pulled it up, showing off her arm bloodied from Powell's attack, her wrists painfully red from the ties, Todd's blood soaking her hands.

"And that's just the physical evidence of what he did. He was going to slit her throat, do you understand that? _Leave them,_" he hissed again darkly. "If we take them with us, I promise you I will kill him myself, with my bare hands, so it's pointless," he spat. Starr looked at Schuyler in slight alarm- he didn't sound like he was exaggerating, not even a little bit.

"Agreed," Marty chimed in, gazing at Powell hatefully now that she no longer had to pretend to feel in debt to him. "It's the least of what they deserve."

Brody nodded reluctantly, and finished pushing the chair to the bedside. Suddenly, just as Schuyler and Brody began discussing the best way to transfer him, Todd emitted a soft groan of pain. They all froze, slowly looking to Todd as if waiting to see if they'd imagined it, but the groan was followed moments later by several hard coughs. Schuyler carefully watched him with bated breath, only inhaling when what he'd been waiting for didn't happen.

"He's not coughing up blood."

"That's good, right?" Starr asked hopefully, watching her father like a hawk.

"That's good; I can't say for sure, but it looks to me like Powell didn't hit anything vital, which is _very_ good. Todd," he said the man's name loudly, lightly slapping his fingers against his cheeks. "Todd, you with us?"

"Dad?" Starr tried as well.

Todd's eyes slowly fluttered open, and he gazed around wearily, spotting Schuyler first; his eyes instantly narrowed, and Schuyler nearly laughed. Even when he was suffering from a knife wound to the chest, Todd clearly wanted to throttle him.

"What the hell…" he paused, gritting his teeth and struggling to breathe, making a painful sounding wheezing noise that brought tears to Starr's eyes. "…are you doing here?"

"I was with your daughter when we heard the news, I came with her," he informed him calmly, wanting to encourage that anger to keep him awake and in a fighting mood. Sure enough, Todd looked ready to attack, and Schuyler smirked. "You can't kill me if you don't make it out of this alive, right? So I need you to try and stay alert, and do whatever you need to get through this. You're not going to do this to Starr; after everything you've already put her through, you're not going to make her watch you die too, so hang in there," he ordered firmly. "We have to get out of the house, so Brody and I are gonna move you- if the pain gets worse, tell me." Schuyler looked to Starr now, dropping his voice so only she could hear. "Hold the card in place, and try and keep him aware, we're going to move him in a sec."

Schuyler carefully shifted Todd so Starr was holding the credit card down and could support him on her own, then slid off the bed; Starr gently cupped her dad's cheek and turned him so he could see her.

"Dad," she choked out, more tears rapidly spilling over. "I love you so much, okay? You know that, right? I don't care about your past, I love you."

"I love you too," he replied weakly. She sniffed, smiling.

"I know, and I need that to be enough, okay? I need you to fight, for me, promise you will."

Todd simply nodded, taking the hand that was still resting on his cheek and squeezing it tight in his.

A few minutes later, Brody and Schuyler had gotten Todd situated in the chair and were lifting it up to carry down the stairs; Marty and Jessica had gotten John untied and were carrying him between them by his arms and ankles, and Starr was holding Hope, and still holding the credit card in place, carefully walking in step with Schuyler and Brody. Hope had begun crying as soon as Jessica handed her over, and Starr struggled not to let it get to her when she had to focus so strongly, even though she'd be lying if she said it didn't pain her. Starr never regretted letting Jessica adopt Hope, and she knew being a teen mother never would have been the right path her, but moments like this did occasionally hurt her, make her wonder what if for just a fleeting moment.

They finally got outside and away from the house after a painstakingly slow journey down the stairs and met up with her mom, who was sitting guard over Tea's beaten, unconscious body on the lawn. As the rest of the group exchanged frantic hugs and explanations, Starr saw Schuyler wrapping Brody's discarded jacket around her dad, making sure to keep him warm as he attended to his wound and continued speaking with him to keep him conscious, and she felt her heart swell with love to know he would fight so hard to keep a man he despised alive just for her.

Two ambulances showed up soon after and took Starr's parents and Tea to the hospital, the paramedics assuring them the cops would be there soon, along with another ambulance for Starr and John, and so Brody, Marty, Hope and Schuyler (due to his exposure to gas in the basement) could be examined just for safety.

Once they were left alone again, Starr slowly exhaled, finally feeling like she could just breathe and take a moment to think now that the chaos and terror were over. She looked to Schuyler, who just gave her a thin smile and wordlessly opened his arms to her. Starr collapsed into his embrace with a content sigh; the medics had said her family would be okay, they had all made it out safely, and she was where she belonged, in Schuyler's arms, that was all she needed.

"I knew I shouldn't have left you," he murmured, voice thick with guilt as his fingers lightly touched the makeshift bandage on her arm.

"Schuyler, please don't do that," Starr groaned. "I still would have gotten hurt if you'd been there, Powell would have tied you up and knocked you out just like he did to John, and my mom, dad, and Tea would probably be all be dead right now," she reminded him, shuddering at the thought, before glancing up at him with a tender gaze. "You saved both of my parents lives tonight, Schuyler, even after everything my father has done to you, I…I don't even know where to begin, how I could possibly thank you enough for that."

"You don't ever have to thank me, you know that. I would do _anything_ for you, Starr, in a heartbeat."

"And vice versa, for the record," she told him warmly, nuzzling her head into the crook of his neck. "Have I mentioned recently that I love you?"

"You may have said something along those lines," he chuckled, pressing a kiss to her hair. "I love you, Starr."

The duo were so wrapped up in each other that neither of them noticed Jessica and Brody flat out staring at them with wide, stunned eyes.

".God. Oh my God!" Jessica whispered to Brody frantically. "Are they…?"

"Well, it definitely looks like they are."

"They are," Marty sighed in confirmation, wrinkling her nose and looking away.

"Starr and her _teacher?_ Oh my God!" she softly cried again in disbelief, shaking her head as she watched them embrace tightly. "Somebody's got some explaining to do…"

**End Chapter**

Lol, poor John. I've taken his two big hero moments on the show, saving Todd from Zach and Powell, and made him completely useless during them both.

Also, the medical stuff with Todd comes from spending 5 minutes on google/yahoo answers, so I basically have no idea what I was talking about- I didn't think it was a big deal, nobody's reading this for medical accuracy, right? Lol. I can tell you now his recovery time is probably not going to be anymore realistic, but look, on the show itself he gets his freaking throat slit and isn't even speaking with so much as a rasp ten seconds later, so I think that gives me some leeway, hee. Oh, and a quick note- since the basement didn't collapse in on Tea in this version, but she still has her serious injuries, let's just say Powell beat her up worse than in the show and that's how she got so hurt.


	25. Chapter 25

So, what color stitches do you want?"

Starr glanced up sharply, having been zoning out in her dark thoughts as a hospital intern took care of her arm, and cocked her head with a small smile when she saw him motioning to several different color options.

"I thought we adults automatically got stuck with black and only six year olds got to choose a color."

"Nope- six year olds and people who look like they need cheering up."

"Because nothing says cheer up like bright pink stitches?"

"Pink, you said pink! Nice choice, very easy to coordinate with an outfit." She couldn't help herself and laughed slightly, and he grinned. "Knew I'd get ya. Alright, I'm gonna stitch you up now- arm's all nice and numb?"

"Might as well be asleep," she confirmed.

"Okay, it shouldn't be too bad, but there is a chance this might hurt a little," he warned. She shot him a look.

"Probably not worse than getting cut with the knife did."

"Point taken," he chuckled.

He had her arm stitched up and bandaged in no time at all, and started to hand over the cleaning medication until Starr informed him they had plenty at home; he nodded in understanding.

"I saw in your file that you've had stitches before; do you remember how to take care of them, or would you like me to go over it with you again?"

"Nah, injuries are old hat for me, I know what to do."

"Okay, well, in that case, you're free to go."

"Oh my God, really?" Starr asked eagerly, perking up for the first time since she'd been separated from Schuyler. He nodded, and she hopped off the bed. "Do you know where any of the people I came in with are at? Did my dad's surgery go well? Are my mom, Tea and Mr. Joplin okay, the gas didn't do anything to them? Is Hope-"

"Whoa, slow down; I'm sorry, but I don't know anything,' he told her apologetically. "I'm an intern, we're always in the dark. They just gave me your chart and all they told me was your name and that you needed stitches." Starr sighed heavily, disheartened, and hung her head low. "And there was also something about you being in here every week and a reassurance that you could walk me through it if I forgot what to do," he cracked, trying to cheer her up.

"Good to know my reputation precedes me," she laughed. "Thanks so much for your help; I guess I should get going if I'm gonna track everyone down."

He said goodbye and Starr wandered out of the room, digging her fingers through her hair in frustration as she took a breath; she hated not knowing where anybody was. She was just wondering if she should try to find her father's doctor first, or go check on her mom and Schuyler and see if they knew what was going on, when a loud, hysterical shriek interrupted her thoughts.

"_Starr!_"

She whipped around in surprise and saw Langston rushing down the hall towards her. As soon as she was close enough, she nearly tackled Starr, throwing her arms around her in a hug so forceful that it almost sent them both crashing to the ground.

"There you are! They said you were fine, but I was so worried! Is it me or is this hospital friggin impossible to navigate? I feel like I've been looking for you for hours, I swear, and I've been freaking. I know you said something bad was going on but I didn't think it would be _this_ bad- holy crap, look at your clothes!"

"What are you-"

"Oh my God, what happened to your arm?!" Langston cried, her eyes wide as she noticed the bandage. "I heard part of what happened from Jess, but I didn't hear anything about you being hurt!"

"Oh, well, um, when Powell kind of snapped, he cut my arm with a kni-"

"You got _stabbed?!_" Langston all but screamed, her eyes wide with shock and horror. "Oh my God! Are you okay? Does it hurt like crazy? Oh my God, that's so scary! I can't believe you got stabbed! Oh, Starr, you-"

"Langston," Starr interrupted her, to her shock a slight giggle escaping her in response to her friend's hysteria. "I didn't get _stabbed_, I was _cut_, very shallowly. Honestly, it didn't hurt all that much, I needed less stitches than the time I wiped out on my bike when I was little, and I can get them removed really soon, it's not a big deal- I'm not even going to get a cool scar for my troubles."

"Alright, you sure?" she asked anxiously, still looking her over. Starr nodded. "Okay, good- whew!" she laughed nervously. "Sorry for losing it- I'm not good in high pressure crisis situations. Man, I could never have your life, Starr; put a gun to my head or a knife to my throat and I'd screw anyone over in a heartbeat."

"Langston, what are you even doing here?" Starr asked in confusion. "Shouldn't you be home with Jack and Sam? And you said you talked to Jess? Have you seen anybody else? Schuyler and I had to stay away from each other once the cops showed up," Starr sighed, feeling a pang as she recalled how guilty and pained Schuyler had looked when they'd had to separate. "And we all got taken to different areas of the hospital once we got here, I don't know how anybody is. Are they all okay? Have you heard anything about my dad's condition? Is Tea stable? My mom and Schuy and Hope are fine, right? Has anybody called Cole yet? And what the hell happened to your hair?" Starr finished her ramble of questions breathlessly, having been in such a fog that she had literally just now noticed the absolutely hideous orange streaks scattered messily through her best friend's locks.

"What happened to my…oh, that," she laughed, fluffing her hair. "I'll get to that in a sec, start with the most important question- everybody is totally okay as far as I know. We were all _so_ worried back at the house, so when the cops called to tell us you were all at the hospital, Dorian offered to watch Sam so Jack and I could come check on everyone. Your brother went straight to intensive care to wait for your dad to get out of surgery- oh, Tea's up there too, and she's pretty beat up but stable- so I went to find everyone else. But before you have to ask, yes, I've been checking in with Jack, and your dad's surgery is over, he made it through with no complications, doctor said he should make a full recovery."

"Oh, thank God," Starr choked out, tears of relief piercing her eyes as she nearly wilted. "Can I see him?!"

"Jack said no visitors right now- he's not even conscious yet, but he's gonna text me or send someone to find you when there's a change."

"Okay," Starr sighed, swallowing her disappointment as she rubbed her eyes. "What about everybody else?"

"So far I've seen Jess, Brody, Marty, and Schuyler- I found you before your mom. Hope is perfectly fine, and Brody's got a concussion and looks like he took a baseball to the forehead, but will be okay. Marty's also fine, and I heard from her that John's alright, just still unconscious, and that your mom's a-okay too, but out like a light because they gave her a sleeping aid to help with the exhaustion."

"And Schuyler?" Starr prompted, her heart leaping to her throat when Langston hesitated; please, God, she could not take any more terror tonight.

"Oh, nothing's wrong with him physically!" Langston assured her quickly. "It's just that he was totally freaking out about not being able to be with you. It's not like this is new for you guys, and you both normally seem so okay with the way things have to be in public, but he was having a really hard time with it tonight. Like, even once I reminded him why he logically can't show any concern or care and go rushing through the hospital to be at your side, I practically had to sit on him to keep him from doing exactly that; and, for the record, you might see him as just your boyfriend, but to me he's your boyfriend, a new friend of mine, but still my _teacher_ too, so all but pinning him down was wonderfully uncomfortable for me," she muttered, rolling her eyes before growing more serious when she saw Starr's heavy expression. "Starr, did…did something else happen at the frat house, beside your arm? Something that's making Schuyler act even more protective of you than usual?"

"I don't really want to get into the details of tonight right now," she sighed, unconsciously rubbing her neck once again and reassuring herself she was fine as she shivered at the memory; even just the mental image of Powell coming so close to slitting her throat was sending sharp spikes of fear through her heart.

"That's fine, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. I just noticed you seem a little more upset about having to stay away from him than usual too."

"I am," Starr groaned. "It just really sucks having to stay away from the one person you need most after a night like this; this night has just been disaster after disaster and it's wearing me out."

"Um, well, I have one more possible disaster in the making to add, unfortunately. I wasn't sure if I should say anything, but I figured you'd probably wanna know. Okay, um, keep in mind that I could just be crazy paranoid, but…I think Jessica totally knows about you guys!" she blurted out.

"What? Why?" Starr cried.

"I don't know, it's just that when I was talking to him about you, I could see her just staring at us with this _look_ this really knowing _look_- you had to see it to understand, but I just got a feeling she knew."

"But how could she possibly…oh. _Oh._"

"What?"

"I just realized, maybe she knows because I repeatedly told Schuyler I love him two feet away from her and was practically sitting in his lap until the cops came," Starr groaned, rubbing her temples as her head throbbed. "God, I'm a moron; one near death experience and I forget _not_ to tell my teacher I love him in front of my cousin. What are the odds I can convince her he's just become a really good friend of the family and I meant I love you like a brother or something?"

"Uh, not good, but you never know until you try?"

"Great, and now I have to be even more careful around him tonight," Starr muttered miserably. Langston took pity on her friend, squeezing her shoulder.

"If you guys find a good supply closet, I promise to guard it for you," she offered. Starr gave a slight laugh, winding her arm around Langston's shoulders and lightly hugging her side.

"Thank you, Langston. Hey, have I mentioned how sorry I still am for telling you to shut up earlier?"

"Your parents were being held hostage by a murderer, I think that gets you a free pass," she told her with a grin, shaking her head. "No worries. So, want me to take you to where everyone else is?"

"Yes, please, I want to see them."

"Alrighty, come on. Oh, by the way, I did call Cole, he's on his way over. I didn't know about Marty getting her memories back yet, though, so I guess that's gonna be a surprise," Langston informed her as she led the way down the halls.

"Did he seem…okay?" Starr asked hesitantly; they both knew what she was really asking- did he seem like he was going to handle this stress by running off to Asher.

"I think so," Langston replied cautiously, her tone dark, before softening and adding in a whisper. "I really hope so. I'll tie him to a chair if he makes me, I swear."

There was a moment of silence as they waited for the elevator, and Starr glanced at Langston, an amused smile on her lips.

"So, now can you tell me why you look like a tiger?"

"Oh God, I do, don't I?" Langston asked, cracking up. "Well, Jack was really quiet and shaky when we got home, and he _still_ seemed really scared and worried about you after a while, so I was trying to think of some way to distract him and make him feel better. I remembered that he used to be like, totally fascinated by my hair and thought my streaks were really cool, so I let him do them for me. I probably shouldn't have let him mix the color too, but hey, you live and learn," she laughed. "They'll wash out eventually anyway."

"_Eventually?_ Lang, are they even going to be out by graduation?"

"Probably, but I'm not sure."

"And you don't mind that?"

"Nah; Jack thinks it looks cool, and it got his mind off the drama for a while and made him calm down, that's all that really matters."

"You're such a good sister," Starr remarked, smiling at her softly as they entered the elevator.

"What?" Langston asked, startling. "I'm such a good _what?_"

"What, you don't think Jack sees you as a sister by now, just like I do?" Starr asked. "I'm positive he does- Sam too. You're there for them just as much as I am."

Langston slowly smiled to herself as she mulled that over.

"I guess you're right- I know I see them that way. I have brothers," she reflected, a giddy note of happiness to her tone as she grinned. "It just hits me all over again sometimes how cool this is."

"What is?"

"That I went from being all on my own, having _nobody_, to having a sister and brothers and a mom and the greatest guy in the world, and…whatever Cole is to me," she laughed. "I went from having only myself to a real _family_."

"A crazy family," Starr laughed tiredly as the doors opened, nodding around the hospital much of that family was currently in. "But yes, you definitely have one that loves you."

"And one I wouldn't trade, crazy or not," Langston added firmly as they stepped out and walked down an empty hall.

"Starr!"

Starr's head shot up at the sound of Schuyler's voice, and she saw him speeding towards her from the other end of the hall. All thoughts of logic and keeping up appearances vanished from her mind, as the relief she felt to see the person she'd been longing so fiercely for overwhelmed everything else. The feeling she got around Schuyler in situations like this was so powerful that she couldn't fully explain it; it was just a total sense of peace, assurance, that she had no reason to worry or be afraid anymore because everything would be alright as long as he was with her.

The second he was close enough, Starr threw her arms around his neck, even as some part of her registered how stupid this was. Schuyler seemed to be feeling the same way, because he wound his arms around her waist and hugged her tightly, burying his face in her hair.

"Uh, guys?" Langston piped up awkwardly after they held each other in silence for a minute, shuffling over and trying to hide them the best she could with her small frame as her eyes nervously darted around the hallway. "I understand how you're feeling, but-"

"You okay?" Schuyler asked her simply, his voice soft but heavy with concern as he eyed the bandage on her arm, and they both seemed completely oblivious to Langston or anything but each other.

"Fine now," she answered warmly.

"Aw," Langston couldn't help cooing, before shaking herself out of it. "This is really sweet, but guys, you-"

"Starr, I'm so sorry I had to-"

"Don't, please. You couldn't have done anything differently- _I'm_ the one who reminded you to stay away from me, remember?"

"Hate to intrude, but, that's probably what you should be doing now," Langston spoke up nervously.

They finally seemed to hear her, and Starr gasped as reality set back in and she realized how dangerous what they were doing was; she instantly, though reluctantly, let go of Schuyler and they stepped away from each other.

"Sorry; you have this strange way of making me act really impulsive," Starr remarked with a smile as she and Schuyler gazed at each other intently.

Langston quickly averted her eyes; she didn't really know how to describe it, but Starr and Schuyler just had this way of _looking_ at each other, the way they were now, that seemed more intimate than any kiss. It was like they were having a complete conversation with only their eyes, and even though they weren't saying a word, even when it only lasted a moment, you felt like you were intruding on something really private.

"So, you heard that everyone is okay, right?" Schuyler asked her after a moment; Starr nodded.

"Have you by any chance seen my mom? Langston found me before her and I would just feel better knowing you've seen she's fine for yourself."

"I have, and she is- looks very tired but peaceful, you have nothing to worry abo-"

"Starr!"

Starr glanced behind her when yet another person yelled her name in greeting, and gasped when she saw Jack rushing their way. She quickly spun around so she was standing next to Schuyler and awkwardly positioned herself so that she was partially behind him. Schuyler glanced at her in confusion for a second, then his face lit up with understanding as he realized she was hiding her bandaged arm. The sight of his sister covered in their dad's blood would probably shake Jack up enough as it was, he didn't need to see that she was hurt herself at the same time.

Shaking his head in amazement over Starr's ability to consider everyone else's feelings first, even now, on a night that would have left most people a quivering, self-concerned mess, Schuyler quickly shrugged out of his jacket, and placed it on Starr's shoulders.

"Thank you," she whispered gratefully, not surprised he'd understood so quickly- he always did.

Starr shoved her arms through the sleeves and wrapped the jacket around her tightly; luckily, it was long on her, so it hid most of the blood, as well as her arm.

"Hey, Jack," Starr greeted her brother with an affectionate smile as he reached them, opening her arms to him. Jack put up none of his usual 'Ew, sister cooties' fight and instantly hugged her waist, releasing a shuddering breath.

"There you are," he grumbled as he let her go, his voice filled with lingering traces of anxiety. "Langston said she'd let me know when she found you but it was taking forever, I thought I was gonna have to do it myself. You…you're okay, right?" he asked hesitantly. Starr smiled playfully.

"Of course I am- didn't I promise you everything would be okay? And am I _ever_ wrong?"

"You don't want me to answer that," he replied darkly, easily falling into the whole bickering brother and sister act, just as Starr had intended.

"Ouch- I'm gonna get you back for that one, you little brat. Hey, so um, Jack, before you left to come find me, did they tell you if there was any change with dad?" she asked casually. Jack frowned.

"No…but he'll be alright, won't he?"

"Of course he will," she stated confidently. "Again, I'm never wrong, so you have no reason to worry, okay?"

"Okay," he replied, still appearing nervous. Starr tried to think fast.

"So, anything interesting happen at the house after we left, other than you giving Langston those really cool streaks?"

"Well, uh…oh!" Jack suddenly gasped as he recalled something, turning his attention to Schuyler as his eyes lit up and he suddenly seemed much more at ease. "You broke that Kyle guy's nose!" he announced. Schuyler flinched, and looked at Jack apologetically.

"I didn't mean to lose my temper like that, I shouldn't have-"

"No, I'm telling you because it was _cool_," Jack informed him with a grin. "There was blood all over, and they had to straighten the bones back into place and it was so gross and neat," he told them gleefully, in the exact same way he did when describing whatever recent horror movie he'd seen to Starr- always with far more detail than she wanted to hear. "And you only punched him once; that makes it even cooler. Besides, he almost made Starr cry," he added darkly, shrugging. "He deserved it."

"I can't disagree with you there," Schuyler said, clenching his fists just at the thought of Kyle.

"What did he do?" Langston asked Starr in confusion.

Starr turned to Langston to quickly explain what Kyle had said, and as they were talking, Jack nervously tugged on the sleeve of Schuyler's shirt to get his attention. Schuyler looked down at him with a friendly smile, kneeling so he was at his level.

"What's up, buddy?"

"Jessica and Brody told me you saved my dad's life; I know you guys don't really like each other, so I just wanted to say thanks," Jack told him sincerely.

"I just did what anyone would have, it was the right thing," Schuyler replied, shaking off the compliment.

"But _anyone_ didn't save him. _you_ did," Jack said firmly. "Just like you saved my sister from that other guy. You didn't have to do those things, but you did."

"I don't ever want to see anything happen to your sister or anyone else in your family, Jack," Schuyler told him softly. "As far as I'm concerned, I _did_ have to- I never could have lived with myself if I didn't. I will _always_ do what I can to keep your family safe," he vowed.

"You really like my sister, huh?" Jack asked Schuyler after studying him carefully for a moment. Schuyler ducked his head and smiled broadly at the understatement.

"I really do."

"Good," Jack declared. "Starr's sad too much of the time; I want her to be happy." Then, as little brother instincts kicked back in and Jack seemed to grow paranoid someone might have heard him say something so mushy about his sister, he added, "But for the record, I think you're too good for her."

For a multitude of reasons, Schuyler was unable to help himself and burst into hysterical laughter over the comment, catching Starr and Langston's attention.

"Uh-oh, what's so funny?" Starr asked.

"Nothing," Jack answered quickly, exchanging a secretive grin with Schuyler as the man stood back up and they both returned their attention to Starr. "So, now that you're here, can we go to the cafeteria?" he asked his sister. "I'm hungry, and I wanna get dad some chocolate chewies for when he wakes up."

"Can you wait just a few minutes? I want to check in with everybody really quick."

"I can take him," Langston offered. "All I've had since breakfast is greasy movie popcorn, I could use a real meal myself."

"Thanks, Langston," Starr said gratefully.

Langston and Jack left, and Starr immediately turned to Schuyler with an inquisitive smile.

"Okay, really, what was so funny?"

"Oh, just the fact that your brother thinks I'm too good for you," he chuckled. Starr's jaw dropped and she couldn't help laughing herself.

"What? Already? Damn! I thought I was going to get at least a few days of protectiveness out of them before they started wishing they could trade me for you. You totally cheated with the whole punching Kyle thing- that's too flashy a move, I had no chance to keep him from liking you better at that point," she giggled for a moment before getting quiet and growing serious. "By the way, Schuy, this is going to sound a little weird, but I didn't get a chance to say this back at the house, so…thank you for punching Kyle for me," she told him in a rush. "I know I'm normally all 'Violence doesn't solve anything, just talk it out or let it go!' but he went too far, and I really appreciated what you did- what you _always_ do, jumping in to defend me no matter what."

"Anytime," he promised her, his voice quiet but intense. "That's what you do for the person you love, Starr, it's not something you have to thank me for." Starr mulled that over for a moment, then smiled at him sadly.

"I guess in some ways, I'm still kind of getting used to having someone whose feelings for me aren't conditional," she remarked, shrugging.

And it was true; sure, Todd and Cole would both defend her tooth and nail…when she was on their good side. Whenever she did something that pissed them off or they disagreed with, she was out, they didn't seem to have any problem throwing her to the wolves or even being the first to attack. Hell, even Langston, the person Starr had her healthiest relationship with up until Schuyler, could be capable of it- as evidenced by how cold and unsupportive she'd been of Starr's feelings for Schuyler when she was still on Team Cole, or the fact that she'd basically blamed Starr for Cole's drug problem until Markko opened her eyes.

"Starr," Schuyler began quietly, feeling greatly pained that she had to say something like that. "I want-"

"I know you're about to say sorry that I've gone through that or something, but please don't," Starr said earnestly. "They've made mistakes, but I love all the people that are close to me and I'm lucky to have them…and now I have you," she added softly, her eyes warm. "And _you_ make up for every bad thing that happened before you came along, you make it all worth it, because what I have with you is more than what most people even get to _hope_ for. I am very lucky, and I am very happy now, so don't look like you're sad for me, okay?"

"You know you're the only person in the entire world who would call themselves lucky after a night like the one you just had, right, crazy person?" Schuyler asked in amazement, chuckling as he shot her a grin filled with pure love and admiration. "I can't believe you sometimes." Starr laughed.

"I have to throw you curveballs like that- keeps you on your toes, keeps you interested."

"You never have to work to keep me interested, trust me," Schuyler told her, with a sly, seductive smirk, that was completely unfair of him to shoot her when they were in a public place.

"Schuyler Joplin?"

The smirk instantly disappeared and Starr and Schuyler both jumped as a police offer rounded the corner and saw them.

"That's me- what can I do for you?"

"You and Miss. Saybrooke are the last people I need a statement from; sorry, I know it's not as though you have anything to tell me that I haven't heard from everyone else, but it's protocol," the officer apologized.

"It's no problem. I'll see you later, Miss. Manning," Schuyler called to her as he walked away with the officer.

"Bye, Mr. Joplin," she replied with a secretive smile.

Starr was then left alone in the hallway, the complete silence so jarring after the chaotic noises of this night that it was making her ears ring. Her head ached as the quiet allowed the thoughts she was trying to block out to come creeping back in, and Starr wrapped her arms around herself tightly, nuzzling her nose against the collar of the jacket and inhaling deeply. Schuyler's comfortingly familiar scent enveloped her, and Starr sighed peacefully; it was the next best thing to actually being in his embrace, and it did the trick to clear her head- she was good now.

Starr was just about to search out her mother when her phone rang, and she quickly grabbed it, nervously glancing around the halls for any angry nurses.

"Hello?"

"Starr?!" It was Cole's voice, strained and frantic. "Where are you?! Are you at the hospital?" he demanded.

"Um, yeah," she answered slowly, thrown off by his behavior.

"You and Hope are okay, right?"

"Completely fine."

"And my mom?!" he shouted back almost the instant she got the words out.

"Also fine! Cole, calm down, take a breath- everybody is okay, there's nothing to get upset over." _Nothing to go pop a few pills over_, she added to herself silently. "Where are you?"

"I'm in this goddamn hospital but I can't find my mom, and everyone I've asked either doesn't know or looks too terrified of me to answer!"

"Okay, well, again- calm down, that might help with the latter issue," she muttered. "Look, I'll come find you, alright? Where are you at right now?" she asked, walking down the hall.

"Hell if I know, every floor here looks exactly the same," he grumbled. Starr huffed in frustration.

"Take a look around- are you surrounded by trauma patients, babies, what? Give me something."

"I don't know- there's not that many people here, and none of them look all that sick."

Starr frowned, cocking her head as it was like she heard his voice echoing. She walked in the direction she'd thought she heard the noise, and said his name into the phone.

"Yeah?" he prompted impatiently. Starr gave a short laugh, definitely hearing his voice 'live' this time as well as over the phone.

"Cole, I think we're like, ten feet away from each other."

She rounded a corner, and sure enough, there he was; she hung up the phone with a laugh, shaking her head. If she were less tired and distracted, Starr was pretty sure she could have made the fact that they'd been so close to each other but had no idea into some kind of metaphor about their relationship.

"Hey," she said softly, giving an encouraging smile as she walked to his side; Cole looked like he was about to put his fist through a wall, throw up, or possibly do both. "Cole, are you alright?"

"Me? Am I…you're actually asking me that? I didn't know for sure until thirty seconds ago that that my mom and my daughter and my girlfr…and _you_, were all safe, so I'm not feeling too great!" he hissed back. "I just get a call from Langton, who sounds like she's losing it too, and she can't tell me what's going on, and I didn't know if I was going to lose _everything_," he added weakly, clenching the phone still in his hand a little tighter; Starr saw that his hands were shaking violently and she felt a rush of worry.

"Cole, everybody is more than okay, I _promise_," she reassured him, pulling him into a hug without thinking, just wanting him to feel better and calm down- nothing good ever came of Cole getting worked up.

He held her so tightly that it hurt, but she didn't say a word; she could feel his heartbeat slowing back down as he inhaled at a more normal rate, and she knew this was succeeding in getting him to relax.

"You didn't lose anything," she murmured soothingly. "Everybody is safe, you have nothing to be afraid of now."

Cole nodded weakly. After a couple minutes of just hugging in silence, Cole lightly nuzzled his head against Starr's shoulder, breathing deeply, and then Starr suddenly felt his entire body grow tense and stiff as his grip on her instantly loosened. She frowned in confusion for a second, before realizing what was wrong; she didn't smell like her usual self right now, which was what Cole had been wanting- thanks to the jacket, she smelled like Schuyler.

Cole pulled back slightly, enough to look her up and down, and he flinched at the sight of her all bundled up in Schuyler's coat, eyes growing hard again as he released her and took a step back.

"So, let me guess- everyone's okay because Saint Schuyler saved the day again?" he asked flatly.

Starr gazed at him in disbelief, slowly shaking her head as she felt a rush of anger; even now, in the aftermath of a life and death situation, he thought his pissiness about Schuyler was what he should focus on?

"No, actually, Brody did," she replied tightly, before giving him a pointed look. "Not that who saved the day really matters, just that someone did, right?"

"Right. Sorry," he added in a mumble, at least having the sense to look shamefaced. Starr softened again.

"It's fine. You should go see your mom now, okay?" Starr told him. "And Cole, um…prepare yourself. Not only did you not lose anything tonight, you actually _gained_ something, and it's something good, but it's really big, so you should just be prepared for handling it."

"I gained something? And it's…Starr, what the hell are you talking about?" he asked anxiously, the shaking in his hands returning.

"Look, it's better if your mom tells you herself."

"But I just-"

Cole was cut off as his trembling hands caused him to drop his phone and hit the ground. Starr laughed gently, reaching to grab it for him.

"Wait, don't…"

Cole trailed off anxiously as she picked it up, and Starr felt her stomach twist when she saw that the background of his phone was still that same old picture of the two of them together, the one that used to be on her phone as well until she'd deleted the picture altogether several months ago.

There was a moment of incredibly uncomfortable silence as Starr wondered if she should say something to him, before thinking better of it.

"Here you go," she muttered, smiling tightly as she handed it over, before telling him where Langston said Marty was.

"Thanks, Starr," he replied tenderly, managing to muster up a smile for her.

Starr just nodded, wishing him luck, and slowly exhaled once he was gone, shaking her head.

"Oh boy," she sighed simply, rubbing her aching head. She'd already known Cole wasn't totally over her, but she'd been hoping he had at least moved on beyond the point of having her picture on his phone and nearly calling her his girlfriend.

Knowing there was nothing she could do to change how Cole felt (but seriously considering asking Langston to set him up on a blind date all the same) Starr decided to just let it go and went to visit with Jessica. She finally found her outside a small overnight room, and couldn't help but smile at the sight of her, Hope and Brody together, the couple talking quietly with soft smiles as they cooed over their daughter. Starr hung back to give them privacy, and after a minute, Jessica pointed into the room with a look that said it was pointless for him to fight, and Brody sighed dramatically, reluctantly walking inside after kissing her and Hope.

"Hi, Jessica," she announced her presence. The girl quickly turned, obviously on edge, then smiled tightly when she saw her cousin, though Starr noted curiously that she didn't quite relax either.

"Hey, sweetie- good to see you, I was worried. How's the arm?"

"Still numb and painless, and I have pretty pink stitches now," she told her with a small smile. Jessica laughed slightly, sitting in one of the chairs outside the room, and Starr sat down next to her, leaning over and rubbing Hope's hand as she talked. "So, what was that little moment with you and Brody just now about?"

"Oh, the doctors said he should stay overnight for observation just so they can guarantee he doesn't have a friggin' surprise aneurysm or something," she said, raising her voice pointedly as she turned towards the room. "And Brody acted like a big baby and tried to weasel out of it, insisting that he would somehow magically know if there was a clot forming in his brain."

"I can _hear you,_" Brody called.

"I know," Jessica shot back, laughing. Starr couldn't help but grin- she couldn't recall the last time she'd seen her cousin so happy and comfortable with anyone.

The girls talked for a few minutes, and Starr was anxiously waiting for Jessica to confront her about Schuyler or at least give some sign that she was suspicious, but to her surprise, it never came. Instead, once they were done talking, Jessica just fell silent and seemed to zone out as she clutched Hope to her chest.

"Jess? You okay?" she prompted.

"What? Oh, yeah," she said a little too quickly, not convincing her in the  
slightest.

"You know if there's one person you don't have to lie to you, it's me, right?" Starr asked softly, not wanting to push, just for Jessica to understand she was a good person to talk to if you needed someone to hear you out.

"I was just, um…wow, this sounds so stupid now that I'm hearing it like this," she laughed anxiously. "But, I was, uh, just…thinking about some stuff Powell said," she admitted quietly. She looked like she was about to add something about knowing better, and Starr quickly jumped in.

"You too, huh?" she asked. Jessica looked startled.

"You…?"

"Some of the things he said were all I could think about when I was waiting to get my arm stitched up," she confessed. Jessica gave a heavy sight.

"I _know_ it's wrong to let the things a psycho said get to me, that it's exactly what he wanted, but…"

"Just because he's a psycho murderer doesn't necessarily mean he was wrong about _everything,_" Starr finished for her in agreement, shrugging. "Even a broken clock is right twice a day and all that."

"Yeah," Jessica murmured, nervously biting her lip as she averted her eyes. "Starr, I can't even tell you how sorry I am," she blurted out in a rush. "I can't blame you for thinking about what Powell said about me, and Hope, you have every reason to hate me and I can't believe you didn't alrea-"

"What?" Starr cried in shock, her eyes widening. "Oh, Jessica, no! That's not what I meant! I was thinking about a bunch of stuff he said about me and my dad, not anything he said about you or the situation with Hope! I didn't listen to any of that, not for a second, because that _was_ complete crap."

"But the thing is, it's really not," Jessica said weakly. "Yeah, he's twisted, and believe me, I hate him, but what he said about me was just a fact. I kidnapped your baby, and I got to keep the daughter I love in the end… I just got away with _kidnapping_ without suffering for it at all."

"Because you've suffered more than enough as it is, Jessica- you deserved to have something good, finally."

"Do I?" she asked miserably. "I deserve to have something even after I _stole_ it?"

"Jess, that wasn't you."

"Yes, it was, Starr," she sighed. "I can't keep giving myself a get out of jail free card by pinning everything on Tess and Bess. It's not like I'm getting possessed or something- Tess and Bess are just parts of _me._ _I'm_ the one who kidnapped your baby, I'm the one who made you and Cole suffer for months, and there were no consequences for that. I got to keep this little girl that I love more than anything but don't deserve at all, and be the happiest I've ever been. And after everything Powell pointed out, that just doesn't feel fair to me. I owe you…more than I could ever possibly give."

"No, you _don't,_" Starr insisted firmly. "Look, what _Bess_ did with Hope was horrible, I'm not denying that, but you were _sick_, Jessica, and you got help, there's no reason to keep beating yourself up for it. And no, you don't owe me anything; I didn't do anything special by leaving her with you, it was just…_right._ I might be Hope's biological mother, but you're her _mom_. I can barely take competent care of myself, I never could have raised her- even if I'd tried, she would have ended up being taken care of by my mom and a bunch of nannies, which is so unfair to her. With you, she gets to experience a real family. She gets a fantastic mom who loves her, and a great dad and big sister who both adore her. It's more than anyone else I know could have offered her. If anything, I owe _you_ for giving my baby such a great life, the kind I prayed she could have when I was carrying her."

"Yeah, but… the only reason I bonded with her as her mother is because of what Bess did, _stealing_ her away," Jessica said, reluctant to let Starr relieve her of her guilt when she felt so horrible.

"Jess, since I forgive you, there's no reason for you not to forgive yourself," Starr pointed out, pausing and taking a nervous breath, hoping she could make her understand. "Look, I hope this doesn't sound really awful and callous, like I'm saying who cares that I spent half a year thinking my baby was dead, because that's so not what I mean, that will always _matter,_ but…what Bess did, oddly enough, may have caused everything to turn out for the best. This is going to sound really corny, very chicken soup for the soul, but I don't care- I think maybe it's true that everything happens for a reason. If you hadn't had that ordeal with your alters, you wouldn't have met Brody in St. Anne's. Who knows if you would have met him at all, or if you still would have fallen in love with him under different circumstances, and think about how differently your life would have gone this year if you didn't have him- and that's a change that would have affected Bree too, she wouldn't have a father figure like she does now. If I hadn't thought Hope was…gone, I think I would have let my dad get off a lot easier for planning to steal her, and I think I might still kind of be under his thumb, letting him control me- because losing Hope was the last straw that made me decide he wasn't going to screw up my life anymore.

"I was never going to raise Hope, so she'd be with Michael and Marcie, and I'm positive I wouldn't get to be in Hope's life the way I am now if that were the case. You let me be like a sister to her, which means so much to me; with Michael and Marcie, I would have just been a passing friend of the family. And Schuyler and I wouldn't have had that connection through his mom and my baby, we wouldn't have bonded. I'm sure I still would have had a crush on him, believe me," she laughed. "But it would have just been a schoolgirl fantasy. He never would have had a reason to talk to me, we wouldn't have become friends, let alone anything else. I would have gone crazy dealing with some of the stuff I have if Schuyler hadn't been there to support me, and Zach Rosen would have come after me one way or another, but he would have…gotten what he wanted if not for Schuyler," she muttered uncomfortably. "A lot of things would have gone horribly wrong for me without him, actually. And, don't get me wrong, I know Michael and Marcie would have been great with Hope and loved her, but I just…I have this feeling she was _meant_ to be with you guys. I can't imagine her being as happy anywhere else. I could go on and on, but I'm sure you get the idea. It's hard to believe, but a lot of really amazing things came from what Bess did. Life's kind of funny that way."

"Wow," Jessica murmured thoughtfully, rubbing Hope's back as she cocked her head. "That is a mature and surprising perspective. It's nice, though."

"And a valid point, right?" Starr pressed.

"Well, you are very convincing," Jessica conceded, the tension in her body easing out. "I guess it's just still hard for me to accept that I might actually deserve good things once in awhile when I've been so horrible in the past."

"Well you _do_, so accept it, okay?" Starr told her firmly, nudging her shoulder playfully. "Or else."

"Okay, okay, please don't hurt me," Jessica laughed. "Really though, Starr, thank you, I could never say that enough- you have given me the life I always wanted, and you won't even let me feel guilty about it. Thank you."

Starr just smiled and nodded in acknowledgment. There was a moment of silence afterwards, as Jessica slowly began to grin, and she looked at Starr with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"So…what was that, about how Schuyler wouldn't have been your friend, _let alone anything else?_"

"Oh my God!" Starr shrieked before she could even attempt to cover, her eyes widening as her hands flew to her mouth in shock; oh, crap, how had she not realized what she was saying?! Why was she such an idiot tonight?

"Ha, I _knew_ it!" Jessica shouted gleefully, unable to help laughing at the deer in the headlights expression her cousin was sporting. "No offense, but I have no idea how you've hidden this so long if you're just blurting it out left and right like that," she teased. Starr gaped at her for a moment, just blinking as her mouth hung open.

"I'm better at hiding it on nights when I haven't nearly been murdered," she told her in a high, dazed tone, before managing to shake herself out of it and let the panic seep in around the shock. "Jessica, please don't freak out, just give me the chance to explain, okay?! I know it looks bad, and you're probably really upset-"

"No I'm not."

"But I _love_ him, and he- wait, what?"

"I'm not upset," Jessica told her calmly, shrugging. "And honestly, it doesn't look that bad."

"…really?" Starr questioned hesitantly, starting to feel a twinge of hope.

"Yeah, really. I mean, I did freak out a little when I heard you tell him you love him and I realized what was going on, because he _is_ your _teacher_, how could I not? But I just really thought about it, and…I don't know, he seems like a nice guy to me. I mean, he probably saved your and Cole's lives that night with Zach, and he saved you from…" Jessica trailed off uncomfortably, unable to finish the sentence, and there was a moment of tense silence, both knowing she was thinking that he'd saved her from Zach's sick revenge plot too. "The fact that he didn't run screaming into the night after learning what life with the Mannings is really like and was there with you tonight at all is impressive enough. But throw in him putting himself at risk in a room leaking gas to rescue your mom and Tea, and him saving your dad even though it seems like there's some seriously bad blood between them, and it seems pretty clear he's a good person. I mean, it's obvious that he's definitely not some sleaze just looking to hook up with a teenage girl he's teaching, and I know how smart and strong you are- you wouldn't be with some guy who's just trying to take advantage of you. Plus…believe me, Starr, there's no way anyone who saw his face when Powell had the knife at your throat could doubt that he loves you," Jessica informed her softly. "And you _really_ love him too?" she asked.

"So much, Jessica," she told her earnestly, grinning happily as she thought about it. "It's like…I can't even put it into words, everything I say sounds totally inadequate compared to how I feel, y'know?"

"I do, actually," Jessica answered softly, her eyes flickering to the room where Brody where was still getting settled in for his overnight stay. "It's a good feeling, huh?"

"The best," she giggled.

"Aw, see, look at that smile," Jessica cooed as obnoxiously as possible, nudging her. Starr laughed, batting her away. "You're just too happy for me not to be okay with this."

"You're okay with it?" Starr repeated with a grin. Jessica nodded.

"Unless he suddenly gives me some reason not to, I guess…I approve. Like I was saying- I trust you, Starr, so I trust your opinion of him. Especially since, ah…" Jessica hesitated, looking like she wasn't going to finish the thought, but pressed on, a clear note of curiosity in her voice. "Especially since it seems like he's important enough to you for you to have introduced him to Hope."

"How did you…?"

"That day you, Cole and Langston came to the hospital with me for Hope's check up, when Schuyler came by, it seemed like Hope recognized him, so I just assumed…"

"Oh, um, yeah," Starr said nervously, explaining in a rush. "Whenever I have one of my visits with her, I usually take her to see Schuyler. He really adores her, and I just love being able to have the two most important people to me in the same place, and I love getting to watch them together, and he's _really_ good with her, I swear; I hope it's okay that I do that."

"Hey, Starr, you don't have to explain or defend yourself, or ask me for permission. Your time with Hope is exactly that- _your_ time with Hope. You get to do whatever you want, no questions asked- I know she's safe with you, it's why I was saying I know Schuyler must be trustworthy if you'd let him be around her."

"Thank you, Jessica, that means a lot to me."

"Of course. Besides, Hope _wanted_ to see him that day, she seemed to like him, and babies are excellent judges of character," she declared, smiling to herself for a moment before glancing at Starr thoughtfully. "Hey, does your mom know about you and Schuyler?" she asked cautiously. Starr nodded.

"Believe it or not, I get the feeling she already really likes him too. And apparently Jack is already idolizing him, which is so unfair," she scoffed.

"Wow, wasn't expecting that. That's good, though! Well, between the three of us, sounds like you've got the family on board- oh!" Jessica suddenly added in a rush. "Speaking of family- for the love of God, do _not_ let Natalie find out," she laughed. "Unfortunately, I can pretty much guarantee you that she would _freak_ out and have him fired in two seconds flat. You know, even after Brody has proven himself time and time again, she's _still_ kind of iffy on him just because of where we met, it's so irritating. I mean, I love my sister, and I know her intentions are the best, and I know you can't really blame someone for assuming the worst about a teacher and student or a couple of people who met in a mental institution, but…none of it makes her any less annoying when she's trying to keep you from the guy you love," she said with a slight smile. Starr just grinned, shaking her head in amazement.

"I can't believe you're taking this so well."

"Honestly, Starr, if anything, it was about time for something like this to happen," she joked. "I always knew you'd _eventually_ take after the rest of the family; you were a good girl for way too long. Part of me was starting to think you were adopted, because there was no way Todd and Blair combined could have resulted in someone so pristine," Jessica laughed brightly.

"Hey, I got kicked out of school for fighting at the age of 5, I stole from people left and right- do you know how many credit report ratings I have ruined throughout my life? And I've already been placed on probation once, not everyone can say that- why do I never get credit for these things?" she demanded playfully.

"That's true, you were pretty insane as a child- you seem to have reached a happy medium now. So! Tell me about him," Jessica prompted.

"Well, what do you want to know?"

"Everything! Just tell me his history, what he's like, how you two became _you two;_ sounds like it should be a juicy story."

Starr filled Jessica in on everything, from the events in their past that had led to them to each other- Schuyler's drug addiction and stealing from the hospital, his mom being her doctor, and her father blackmailing his mother and setting the events of the baby switch in motion as well as causing Leah's suicide, all the way up to their break-up and yesterday's (God, had it really only been yesterday? It already felt like ages ago) reunion. Jessica seemed amazed by all of it, and slightly amused by the end as well, which Starr questioned her about.

"Oh, I was just thinking that someday, you need to make a movie based on your and Schuyler's story, because that would be a total blockbuster," Jessica remarked with a grin. "I mean, girl gets pregnant, girl's dad uses the doctor's son to blackmail her, leading to tragedy, but then boy and girl meet when-gasp-it turns out he's actually her teacher. Despite the fact that they should hate each other and blame one another for their losses, and how forbidden they are, boy and girl actually become best friends, discover they're perfect for each other and fall in love, and have to face prior mentioned father and a bunch of psychos from his past while struggling with the whole student/teacher thing as is- it already sounds like a professional writer came up with it," she said in amazement, laughing.

"So…I take it this means nothing you heard changed your mind about giving your approval?" Starr asked nervously, needing to be sure; she was so hesitant to believe that she was really lucky enough to get through both her mom and Jessica finding out about them with no conflict.

"No! Honestly, Starr, he sounds like he's good for you. And, actually, he kind of sounds like someone else I know."

"What are you talking about?"

"Hmm…he used to be very messed up and dark, but it's almost impossible to believe based on who he is now, how he's turned it around. You had an unexplainable connections from the start, even when everyone tried to warn you away from him. Even though the circumstances you met under were supposedly so 'wrong', he actually ended up becoming the most functional, healthy relationship you ever had. You face opposition left and right. He would both die and kill for you. He's like your own little family now. He put you back together again at a time when you were at your absolute lowest, when you thought you'd be broken forever, and actually made you feel better than before the break in the first place…Starr, hello, Schuyler is your Brody."

"…huh," Starr said simply, cocking her head as she reflected. Now that she thought about it, she actually saw a lot of similarities between the two men as well. "Yeah, I guess he is," she realized, smiling softly. "Did we luck out or what?"

"That we did- Brody, I know you're eavesdropping, so don't get cocky now," she called out; Starr caught his low chuckle in response, and grinned.

She was about to say something else to Jessica a moment later when her phone suddenly buzzed and she quickly grabbed it, her smile instantly fading when she saw the text from her little brother.

"Starr? What is it?"

"Oh, um…Jack just texted me to say my dad's awake, and is asking for me," Starr answered her quietly, anxiously biting her lip as she gazed at the phone with a conflicted gaze.

"Oh, that's great," Jessica sighed in relief. "I was so worried about him. Tell him how glad I am he's alright, please- I'd visit him myself but I doubt babies are allowed in IC and there's no way I'm letting go of Hope right now. Starr," she prompted as the girl gave no response seeming very out of it.

"What?" she startled, quickly shaking her head. "Oh, yeah, sure."

"Uh, are you okay? After the way you lost it at the house, I was expecting you to be breaking your neck to get to him the second you could."

"I was too, actually," she said with a sigh. "But…remember what I told you, about how I couldn't stop thinking about some of the things Powell said about me and my dad? Well, those thoughts still haven't gone away, and I guess I just feel like when I see him, I'm going to have to get it out in the open and talk about it, which I really don't want to."

"Oh, well, can't blame you, I know I've had to face a lot of conversations that I would have done anything to get out of it. But, Starr, if you could handle facing down a psychotic serial killer the way you did, I _think_ you can handle a conversation with your father."

"Were my father anyone but Todd Manning, I might agree," Starr laughed darkly, rising to her feet. "But I guess I have to get it over with, one way or another."


	26. Chapter 26

Elsewhere in the hospital, Cole was anxiously fidgeting in a waiting room chair, having escaped from his mother's room when the emotions he was feeling and the impact of what had happened tonight overwhelmed him and he couldn't take it anymore.

It felt like that sensation of his skin _crawling_ had returned, and he dug his nails into his arms, taking a deep breath as he stomach churned violently the more he thought of exactly what his mom had 'gained' tonight. How the hell could Starr have told him this was something good? Did she not understand exactly _what_ his mom could remember now?

Cole could not bear to think about it for a single moment more, and abruptly jumped to his feet, anxiously pacing around as the urge to run, to just get the hell out of there and not have to deal with this, overwhelmed him.

"Sit down, Cole."

He startled in response to the unexpected voice and whipped around to discover Schuyler, watching him carefully with an unreadable, heavy expression.

"I wasn't going anywhere," he muttered defensively, plopping down in the chair and nervously drumming his fingers against his legs.

Schuyler hesitated, appearing torn, then sighed and walked over to Cole, cautiously taking a seat beside him.

"What's wrong, Cole?" he asked quietly, averting his eyes to try and make him more comfortable.

Cole snorted, about to comment that Schuyler was the last person one earth he wanted to talk to, but suddenly stopped himself, thinking better of it. Starr would probably hear about that comment and it would make him look even worse to her, and honestly…if there was one person who _might_ understand this, it was him, much as Cole loathed to admit that.

"My mom got her memories back," Cole answered tensely. Schuyler seemed surprised.

"Yeah, I know- I thought you'd be happy about that." Cole slowly shook his head, clenching his fists.

"So did I, for a while. There was a time when the _only_ thing I wanted was for her to be able to remember her past, but the longer she went without her memories, the more I started to think…why? Why do I want her to remember so badly? _What_ has happened to her that's actually worth remembering? Not a whole hell of a lot," he scoffed. "I know not having her memory frustrated her, but she actually seemed pretty happy, and she didn't have to remember anything bad that happened to her, her past couldn't hurt her anymore. But _now_, all at once, she has to remember losing my dad, everything I've put her through, all the ways she's suffered, and worst of all, she has to remember every single thing that sick bastard has done to her," Cole hissed, his voice dripping with disgust. "It's like he gets to violate her all over again, and yet again, he gets off scot-free."

"Well, he did get stabbed in the chest, that's not exactly scot-free."

"Oh, yeah, I heard about that. I also heard you're the reason he's not dead," Cole added, looking at Schuyler in confusion. "Why the hell would you save his life after everything he's done to you?"

"Starr wanted me to," Schuyler answered simply.

"Guess that's why she chose you over me," Cole chuckled darkly. "I wouldn't have given a crap if Starr had _begged_ me, no way could I have _saved_ that son of a bitch. I would have watched him bleed to death, and…I think I would have loved it," he admittedly quietly, his eyes dark with shame over his acknowledgment of something so horrible inside of him.

"You spent months thinking your baby was dead because of him, he's tried to literally kill you- I don't think anyone can blame you for feeling that way," Schuyler offered consolingly.

"He tried to kill you too," Cole pointed out. "He _did_ kill your mom, might as well have been holding the gun himself. I know you love Starr, but man, I still can't believe you would help him." Schuyler shrugged.

"It would be pretty hypocritical of me not to."

"Hypocritical? How?"

"There are a _lot_ of people who have every reason to hate me for some of the crap I've done- they would have every right to spit on me and just walk away if they ever saw me in need of help. But I'd like to think if I really needed them, they'd manage to give me another chance." Cole nodded and looked at his feet, appearing contemplative.

"I paralyzed a kid and got another chance," he admitted roughly. "Considering that, I guess it wouldn't kill me to let go of this Manning crap either. But I don't know _how_- all I can think about is my mom remembering everything he did to her, having to experience the pain from her worst moments all at once, all over again, and it makes me feel _sick_, and I can't stand just sitting here, knowing what she's going through, and it just makes me want to take off and pretend this isn't happening."

"Hey, Cole, I think you're forgetting something- yeah, she has to deal with reliving the worst moments of her life and go through that pain, but she remembers you, she remembers your dad, and she gets to relive the _best_ moments of her life with you two. I think that makes it all worth it- that's why your mom is _happy_ about this, it's why you should try to be too."

"Would that make it worth it to you?" Cole asked curiously.

"What?"

"What if you were in a situation like that? What if you could forget your drug issues, your mom's suicide, every bad thing that's ever happened to you, and never have to feel that pain anymore, but the trade off was forgetting the good times with your mom, and forgetting… Starr," he muttered uncomfortably, hating to acknowledge that Starr was to Schuyler what his dad was to his mom. "If you had the option to forget _all_ that pain, the absolute worst moments of your life, would it really be worth it to give it up just so you could get those good memories back, and for Starr?"

"Yes," Schuyler replied with no hesitation, his tone confident and sure. There was nothing you could possibly offer him that would make him want to forget Leah or Starr, nothing would be worth that. "It would. But you don't think so," he realized. Cole uncomfortably shook his head.

"Back when Hope died- I thought she died- if I'd had the option to just forget everything, even though it would have included all the great memories with Starr that led up to Hope being made, I would have taken it in a heartbeat and never looked back. When I was on pills, I was jealous of my mom, because not even the drugs could make me forget my life the way she forgot hers, and I wanted that. I still feel that way sometimes," he sighed heavily.

"Maybe it's just because you haven't created enough memories worth keeping yet," Schuyler suggested gently. "You and your mom can start to rectify that tonight, but only as long as you don't leave this hospital and go to Asher like I know you're thinking about doing now. She's happy, Cole, there's no reason for you to lose it. Try to think about the good aspects of your mom regaining her memory, and if you can't do that, think about something else altogether."

Cole nodded, trying to do exactly that, and glanced at Schuyler hesitantly, awkwardly clearing his throat.

"Hey, so, um…you and Miss. Jameson ever discuss your homework assignments together?" he asked, referring to the teacher of the normal bio class.

"Sometimes- why?" Cole chuckled slightly.

"Any chance you wanna tell me what the hell the answer to number 8 is? I was doing her homework when Langston called me, and I'm starting to think that one is just a trick question, there _is_ no answer."

"I'm sure there's an answer," Schuyler laughed. "Walk me through the problem, I'll help you find it."

* * *

"Dad?" Starr whispered nervously as she walked into his room once Jack was done. He glanced up tiredly, and weakly broke into a smile.

"Starr…" he breathed simply.

Starr felt tears of relief pierce her eyes at the sound of his voice, and the feeling of being frozen in place instantly vanished as she dashed across the room, leaning down and gently hugging him, being careful to avoid the injured side of his chest.

"Oh my God, dad, I was _so_ scared," she choked out. "If you hadn't been okay, I don't even what I would have-"

"Starr, it's okay, shh," he murmured soothingly, weakly managing to lift his arm and rub her back. "I'm fine- you really think I would let Powell get one over on me?" Starr giggled tearfully and pulled back, rubbing her eyes as she sat in the chair beside his bed. "Starr, what happened with your mom and Tea? Did anything happen to you or Marty, is everyone alright?"

"Everyone is completely okay- everyone but you," she corrected with a heavy tone, still watching him with a nervous gaze. "God, dad, if…if something had happened to you, after what I said the last time we talked, I just…"

"Starr, I knew you never meant it," he consoled her. "You didn't have to worry about that, there was no reason for you to come tonight, you shouldn't have."

"Well…I did mean it at the time," she reluctantly corrected him, frowning slightly. "But I shouldn't have been so stubborn, I should have forgiven you and tried to get past it instead of just staying mad and silent. You know…" she began hesitantly, carefully gauging his reaction. "Schuyler even tried to convince me to talk to you, but I refused to even consider it, and that could have ended up being the biggest regret of my life."

Sure enough, her dad seemed to tune out the moment she said Schuyler's name, his jaw clenching as he shook his head, eyes growing angry. Starr sighed in frustration, already bracing herself for a fight.

"Problem, dad?" she asked wearily.

"Why was Schuyler with you tonight, Starr?" he asked tightly, clearly struggling to keep calm. "I thought he came to his senses and broke up with you."

"Came to his senses? _Wow_, dad, thanks, that's really flattering."

"You know what I mean," he snapped. "Don't tell me this mess is starting all over again, I thought he'd learned his lesson."

"Dad! Schuyler saved your life tonight, why can't you-"

"Nevermind," her dad cut her off. "This is hardly the time to discuss this, we can deal with it later."

"No!" she snapped right back, to her own surprise. "I don't want to wait, give you time to just grow angrier and start scheming and coming up with ways to hurt him- I want us to deal with this _now._ Because you know what? Powell was right about something- you _do_ manipulate me, and I do just let you, and that's not going to happen anymore now that I see it. Yes, I was terrified when I thought I could lose you, and yes, it made me acknowledge how much I love you, but it doesn't give you a get of jail free card. You don't get to sweep this under the rug and just keep hating my boyfriend without a word from me, we're going to talk about this. I want you to acknowledge the fact that Schuyler-"

"Starr, stop it," Todd sighed. "I don't want us to fight tonight."

"Then just be reasonable for once and don't _make_ me have to fight with you!"

"Look, Starr, I know what you want from me, but I am never going to accept a teacher taking advantage of my daughter, sorry if that upsets you."

"That's not what happened!" she shouted. "God, dad, why do you _always_ think people are taking advantage of me? What, it's just _impossible_ for you to believe someone might _genuinely_ love me? Because wow, that's great for my self-esteem, my own father doesn't think anyone can really love me."

"It has nothing to do with me thinking you're worthy of love, Starr, don't try to play that card. .," Todd hissed darkly. "Are you aware of that, do you get that?"

"Oh, so _he's_ that guy at the front of the biology classroom, I had no idea, thanks for telling me!" she chirped sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "_Yes_, I'm aware of this, yes, I get it, but it doesn't _matter._"

"Is that what he tells you?" Todd sneered.

"No, that's what I've always told him," she replied, her voice cold as ice. "It's not like _he_ pursued me, okay? He said the same thing,that it would be wrong for us to ever be together. The first time I kissed him he freaked out for that exact reason and told me he made a mistake by even trying to be friends with me, that he could never be anything but a teacher to me and that if I couldn't accept that, then he was never going to be alone with me ever again. I kept pushing the issue, and he even lied and said he wanted nothing to do with me and that he was dating someone else- he was practically on the verge of playing matchmaker for me and Cole, for God's sake. When he broke up with me, it was because _you_ got to him, and he thought I was better off without him up until Cole and Langston managed to get through to him. He loves me, but he let me go because he thought it was best for me- why does that not mean anything to you?"

"Because it's completely fake- if he loved you, he would stay away from you, period, but he's just _using you_, so he won't. He goes on and on about how you're too good for him, how this is so wrong, because he knows it makes him sound all noble and self-sacrificing, but then tells you even knowing that he can't stay away, so he gets what he wants from you all the same but leaves you thinking he's some great guy instead of the perv he is."

"You don't know _anything_ about him, you have no right to make accusations like that!" she shouted.

"I know more than enough, believe me! I know that you can only suffer because of him, and I know that if he cared at all, he'd cut himself out of your life before he could cause that to happen to you! He's not the good guy you paint him out to be, he's a sick bastard, and he's taking advantage of you, and you're going to get hurt!"

Starr sighed, realizing she was going to have to go exactly where she hadn't wanted to, and shrugged out of Schuyler's jacket.

"Really, dad?" she asked softly, holding up her gauze wrapped arm. "I'm going to get hurt because of _Schuyler_? Zach held a gun to my head and _assaulted_ me because of you, Powell sliced my arm open with a knife and tried to cut my throat because of _you_-"

"Powell _what?!_" he roared. "I will-"

"I'm not done!" she cut him off, startling him. "The point is, that's a lot worse than anything that's happened to me because of Schuy. Oh, and let's not forget that that I also had to listen to a recollection of the moment you raped someone, which is it's own kind of pain. And scary fact is, Powell wasn't entirely wrong; I have to tell you, sometimes, every once in a great while, I wonder if pushing me down the stairs was really an accident, I get scared when I remember how close you came to hitting me not even once but _twice_-"

"Starr, I-"

"Shut up, I'm talking," she snapped. Todd, who was more used to Starr simply crying and begging for him to listen when they fought, but always giving up when he didn't, looked alarm and did indeed shut up.

"Dad, did I ever tell you that the whole _reason_ Schuyler was there and able to save me from Zach that night was because he was honestly afraid you were going to hurt me if we got in a fight, and he came over to make sure you couldn't? The worst part is, I can't blame him for worrying."

"Starr, I would never hurt you, you have to know that," Todd said weakly, looking crushed by her words. She sighed.

"Physically, no, but the way you treat me makes it understandable that someone else might think so, so don't you _dare_ talk about how being with _Schuyler_ could end up hurting me. You know, like I said, Zach and Powell both did what they did to me because of you, Margaret tried to kill me because of you, you _always_ knew there was a chance people from your past would use me to get to you and I think we both know it's probably never going to stop, but I've never once heard you suggest that _you_ should stay out of my life for my own good. Just a bit hypocritical of you, don't you think? That's why Schuyler dumped me, dad, even though it broke his heart, because he thought he was putting me in too much danger- that's more than you've _ever_ been able to do for me. Hell, you can't even let me go when I _ask_ you to- no, instead you keep inserting yourself into my life and trying to tear me away from the people I love."

"He doesn't really love _you_, Starr, that's the problem."

"_Yes,_ he _does_! Oh my God, will you look at everything he's done? Tonight, he put himself in the middle of a gas leak to save mom and Tea, two women that you _love._ He warned us about the gas leak, and he's the one who came up with the idea of using the chair to keep you from moving too much while we rushed out of the house. The rest of us probably would have just carried you, and it would have sped up the process and made you bleed out really fast. And none of the rest of us would have known to use a credit card to stem the bleeding, and that's what saved you- it kept you from losing too much blood before the medics got there and kept you from having a collapsed lung from too much air getting in the wound. He saved your life," she repeated firmly. "Even after you more or less ended his mom's and threatened to kill him too. He kept me from falling apart and becoming a huge mess like Cole when I thought Hope was dead by being the only person I could turn to, he finally made me happy again, he kept Zach from using me to get revenge against you, he saved mom and Tea, he saved your life…what else does he have to do?" she asked desperately.

"Not be six years older than you, not be your teacher," Todd snapped.

"Oh my God, who cares?! Six years, big frickin deal; I'm sure that'll seem like a huge deal when I'm thirty and he's thirty-six," she scoffed. "And dad, think about everything I _just_ told you- does any of that sound like a pervy teacher just trying to take advantage of a student to you? Besides, it's only for another year, and it doesn't affect us, I _swear_. When school's in session, I am just another student. Can you even _try_ to understand?" Todd gazed at her heavily and sighed.

"You know, Starr, this is the same song and dance as with Cole, and look at how that turned out- was that worth it?"

"Dad, it's not the same thing at all," Starr disagreed softly but firmly, shaking her head. "I didn't love Cole. Well, I did, just like I still do, but I wasn't _in love_ with him. I thought I was, hence me telling you so over and over again, but that was just a high school romance that Cole and I tried to turn into a much bigger deal than it was. But I know I _wasn't_ in love then _because_ of how in love I am with Schuyler, and I know _that_ wasn't real because of how sure I am that _this_ is. _This_ is real- I _love_ him, and maybe you think I can't say this because I'm seventeen, but I know better- I am _always_ going to. Schuyler and I are solid and real and going to last, no matter what. It's up to you if you want to be there for it."

"Starr, please just hear me out," he begged. "If you love him so much, if this is so solid and real…wait a year," Todd pleaded. "You'll be eighteen, and he won't be your teacher then. If you can stay away from each other for a year, then-"

"God, dad, no!" she cried, shaking her head. "I'm not making a deal with you, this is not going to be like it was with Cole- this is not a negotiation you're running. _I'm_ the one in charge here, because you know what? You have no leverage," she informed him softly. "If you truly threaten Schuyler's life, or tell the school board about us and make him lose his job and get run out of town, then you know what? I'm gone too," she declared. "I'll go wherever he does, and until you're ready to accept us, you won't hear from me again. We'll leave and start over new somewhere, and you're not going to find us. I know you're probably thinking, oh, because that worked out so well for you and Cole, but this is so different. My heart was never in that because I knew it wasn't right, but I'm not that little girl anymore, I am more than ready to start _my_ life, the way _I_ want, and that's with _him_. And Schuyler's not some naïve teenage boy like Cole, he's a full grown man who has already been on his own for seven years and has no trouble starting over. I'm not going to have second thoughts because I miss mom like last time, because I'll keep in touch with her- it's just going to be it for you and me. I'm sure you're thinking you could put a stop to that by coming up with some kidnapping charge, but guess what? Mom's got custody, and since she'd be in on it, she would never let that happen. And y'know what? Even if you don't do something quite so drastic and force him out of town, you just act like your usual self and try to manipulate everyone from behind the curtain…I haven't ruled out the possibility of getting emancipated- and you know any judge in this town would grant me emancipation in a heartbeat. And even if none of that comes to pass, it's not that long before I'm going to be eighteen- how are you going to try to run my life then? You're out of options dad. You fight this, you lose me. But I don't see why it should have to be that way," Starr whispered desperately. "You have a _choice_ here dad, and I'm just begging you to make the right one."

Todd was quiet for a long time, appearing contemplative, and Starr watched him carefully, her nerves growing every second.

"You love this guy? Really?" her dad finally asked, cocking an eyebrow. She sighed, laughing in exasperation.

"I don't know how else to say it dad- _yes_, I love him. And I need you to understand something; I meant every word I said tonight, I love you _so_ much and I don't _want_ to be apart from you, but I _will_ if you _force_ me to make it that way. If you force me to choose between you and Schuyler, he will win _every_ single time. I want you both in my life, but if you can't handle that, if you keep threatening him and hurting him and trying to destroy his life, you're the one I'm getting rid of it. I don't care what you try to do to me and I know Schuyler doesn't care what you do to him- you will not keep us apart, no matter what, and if you try to anyway, you might as well say goodbye to me now," she warned.

Todd gazed at her heavily for a moment, appearing incredibly conflicted; he was quiet for _once,_ and Starr was satisfied that he actually seemed to be taking her threats to heart.

"I'm never going to like this guy," he informed her tightly.

"And I'm not asking you too- although that would be a nice bonus," she added in a grumble. "I'm asking you to accept that he makes me happy and keeps me safe, that he's a genuinely good guy, and to not try to kill him or get him fired, that's _it._ I'm not asking you to become all buddy buddy- in fact, I would prefer that you just stay away from him altogether. Do you think you can manage that? Or are you going to prove Powell right and put your hatred and violent tendencies at a higher priority than keeping your daughter in your life?" she challenged.

"Oh, well, like there's a good answer to that one," he muttered with a small, playful hint to his tone.

"_Dad._"

"…okay," he finally choked out, sounding like it hurt worse than being stabbed had.

"Okay what?" she pressed, a smile starting to tug at her lips.

"I'm not giving my approval, don't misunderstand," he told her firmly. "Frankly, I still think this is disgusting, and I still have my doubts about him, I'll be keeping a close watch. But if it means the difference between losing you or having you in my life, I'll back off, I won't go near him. I won't hurt him again, and nobody will hear a word about you two from me. Happy?"

"Something close to it," Starr said softly, eyes lighting up. She leaned over her father and gently kissed his cheek, hovering near him. "Thanks for proving that you actually deserve my faith in you sometimes," she whispered warmly. Todd grabbed her hand and squeezed tightly.

"Anything for you. I love you this much, Starr, okay? And despite what you've accused me of, the only thing I've _ever_ wanted is for you to be safe and happy- I'm sure you won't believe this yet, but frankly, I hope Joplin _does_ prove you right, and me wrong. I just don't trust that he will."

"You'll see that he will in time," Starr promised with a grin, having complete confidence in that. "Thank you so much, dad; it would have broken my heart to have to let you go, especially after we went through tonight. But," she added after a beat, her tone darkening slightly. "You better mean it this time, dad. If these are more empty promises and you're just screwing with me to get your way, I swear to God-"

"I'm not," he reassured her instantly, appearing sincere. "I'm going to start doing right by you, Starr, I promise you that." Starr still seemed hesitant, and he flinched. "I can't blame you for not being ready to believe it. I just want to become someone you can trust again, Starr, and I swear I'm going to."

"I hope you do," she told him quietly, before flashing a quick smile and giving him one more gentle hug. "Okay, I should probably go- you shouldn't be exerting yourself, you need rest. Thanks again, dad; I love you."

"Love you too."

Starr fussed over him for another minute then left once a nurse came along to check on him, slowly exhaling in relief; that had gone _so_ much better than expected. She couldn't believe her three best friends, parents, and cousin were all on board with her and Schuyler; she felt like she'd had a huge weight lifted from her shoulders, and could just enjoy her contentment without quite so much fear.

"Well, you look a lot happier than I expected."

Starr glanced up with a grin, pleasantly surprised by the sound of Schuyler's voice, and saw him waiting for her near her dad's room.

"Hey," she said happily, her stomach getting that pleasant, twisty feeling as he looked her over, in that _way_ of his that she knew meant he'd be greeting her in a much different way if they were alone together. "I am, actually- I think I just got my dad to agree not to kill you, that's the kind of thing that puts me in a good mood." Schuyler seemed startled, and a dubious look passed through his eyes.

"Well, I'm glad you're happy, but I'll wait and see," he chuckled.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not letting my guard down, I'm just saying there's hope now. So, where have you been?"

"Uh, helping Cole with his biology homework, believe it or not."

"_What?"_ she asked in shock. "You were…you and Cole...really?" He just nodded in confirmation. "Huh. Weird day," she summarized with a tired laugh, making him grin. "Well, you're not going to believe what happened with me. Turns out Jessica knows about us too now- are we the worst kept secret in town or what? Anyway, she and I talked about it for a long time, and, not only is she _okay_ with us, she actually _approves,_ and thinks it sounds like you're good for me. Can you believe that?"

"No, actually," he said in a stunned daze, looking at her in disbelief as he slowly smiled. "I'm sorry, Starr, don't take this the wrong way, but… I'm starting to think it's a good thing your family is crazy." Starr burst out laughing as he continued. "Because it's the only possible explanation for none of them having killed me yet."

"Hey, I consider it the opposite- for _once_, they're being reasonable instead of crazy."

"Excuse me, are you Schuyler?"

They both startled as the nurse who'd been with her father stepped out of the room and approached them, asking the question; they exchanged a cautious look before Schuyler nodded.

"Yes, that's me."

"Mr. Manning instructed me to tell you he'd like to speak with you."

"_What?_" Starr and Schuyler chorused. The nurse looked confused and shrugged helplessly.

"I'm sorry, that's all he said."

"Um, how is he?" Starr asked hesitantly.

"Oh, he's just fine," she reassured the girl. "Your father is very strong, he should recover nicely."

"No, um, I mean…is he already able to like, get out of bed, or pick up and throw a heavy object?"

"Oh, um, no, definitely not," she answered, obviously startled and confused by the question. Starr smiled tightly.

"Okay, great, thanks."

The nurse just glanced between the two of them for a moment, clearly lost, then simply turned and left.

"Well, I guess I should-"

"Wait a second," Starr ordered, walking to the room and peering through the door at her father. "Dad, the nurse said you want to see Schuyler- _why?_ Are you going to-"

"Starr, calm down; I'm not going to break my word to you five minutes after I gave it. I just want to speak with him; I'm your dad, it's my right to have a talk with your…boyfriend," he finally managed after struggling to spit the word out. Starr remained hesitant, and Todd sighed. "Starr, what do you think I'm going to do from a hospital bed? This won't take long- go visit with your mom, I'll send him along in a few minutes."

"Promise?"

He solemnly crossed his heart, and Starr couldn't help but give a small smile as she backed out of the room again, turning her attention back to Schuyler.

"All right, I'm trusting him enough to leave you alone with him, but don't be afraid to scream if you need help," she ordered him with mock seriousness. He laughed, glancing around the empty hall carefully, then knelt down and very quickly pressed a kiss to her lips.

"I'm sure it'll be fine," he reassured her, brushing a strand of hair back from her face. "Near death experiences tend to bring out the kinder, gentler sides of people, if only for a few hours."

"But this is my dad- his kindler, gentler side is-"

"Most people's angry, violent side, I know, I know," he chuckled. "But he's still recovering from a knife wound, it evens things out. It's fine- he's right, you should go see your mom, and I'll be there soon."

"Alright," she sighed, squeezing his hand reassuringly and flashing a quick smile before leaving.

Once she was gone, Schuyler hesitated for a moment, then took a deep breath and forced himself to walk through the door. He gazed at Todd evenly, hovering awkwardly by the door as he waited for him to make the first move. Todd just stared him down, in that disturbingly calm state of his, and remained silent until Schuyler couldn't take it anymore.

"So, uh…good to see you're okay," he said with a small nod.

"Please," Todd replied with a dismissive eyeroll. "I don't buy that you're any happier about me being okay than I'd be about you in the same situation." Schuyler laughed darkly, shaking his head.

"Once again, Todd, you and I are very different people; if I didn't want you to be okay, why the hell would I have bothered saving your life?" he asked.

"That's exactly what I want to know, actually."

"What?"

"That's why I asked you in here. You saved my life, and I want to know why."

"You're welcome, by the way," Schuyler snarked, knowing Todd would choke on his own tongue before ever thanking him of all people.

"Come on, I'm sure you'd be thrilled if I died. You hate me, and I'm sure you  
probably see it as an eye for an eye or something, revenge for your mother- so tell me why you didn't let it happen."

"Ooh, thrilled? Thrilled's a little harsh, it's closer to nonplussed." Todd shot him a hard, unamused look, and Schuyler sighed. "Look, to be frank, I think what got what you deserved tonight- not just because of my mom, but because of every single person you've hurt or destroyed throughout your life. And honestly, yeah, I do kind of hate you…but Starr doesn't. She was a wreck thinking you were going to die, and she would have done anything to save you, so…so would I." Todd looked at him questioningly, and Schuyler released a breath of frustration. "You _still_ don't get it? I would do _anything_ for your daughter, Todd- even save the life of the man who killed my mother. As long as Starr, for some reason, still loves you and cares about what happens to you, you're not going to die if I can help it- you didn't deserve it even once, but I'd save you a thousand times over for her."

"Why?" Todd asked instantly, narrowing his eyes.

"Because I love her," Schuyler replied calmly and surely. "Sorry if that pisses you off," he added in a tone that made it clear he wasn't sorry at all. To his surprise, Todd gave a small laugh.

"That was both the right and wrong answer," he remarked. "I'd be furious if you said you didn't love her, and yet I'm not exactly thrilled that you claim you do."

"I don't _claim_ I love her, I _do_," Schuyler corrected him sharply.

"_Why_? You just have a thing for impressionable teenage girls or something?"

"Impressionable?" Schuyler laughed shortly. "Todd, have you _met_ Starr? I love her, but I have to say, she is probably the most bullheaded person I've ever met- if there's anything that girl's _not_, it's impressionable. And let me assure, I never intended to fall for her- she was the last thing I saw coming. I was probably even more disgusted and furious with myself when I realized how I felt than you are now. I spent a long time lying to myself, trying to convince myself they were just misplaced feelings for an old girlfriend of mine, that I was letting our shared grief cloud my mind, and I did everything I could to stay away from her, but…"

"Let me guess, you can't fight fate?" Todd sneered. Schuyler simply shrugged,  
as that _was_ exactly the point he'd been trying to make. Todd glared at him, but calmed down after a moment, seeming to remember his promise to Starr. "Look, I'm never going to like you, and I'm never going to be even remotely okay with this, so don't kid yourself into thinking any differently…but Starr made it pretty clear that what I think doesn't matter, and I'll be damned if I lose my daughter over you, so I won't stand in your way. But I _will_ be keeping an eye on you," Todd warned. "And the second you screw up, the _second_ you hurt her and prove you had no business being with her in the first place, I will-"

"Todd, I know very well that I'm not good enough for Starr and that I don't deserve her," Schuyler interrupted him quietly. "But she disagrees, and I'm going to fight like hell to prove her right; if I ever do anything to screw that up and I hurt her, I can guarantee you I'll be a hell of a lot worse on myself than you could ever be." Todd gazed at him in surprise for a moment, then gave a satisfied nod.

"Good. That was all I really needed to hear from you. You can go now," he commanded abruptly. Schuyler frowned, startled that was it, then quickly decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth, wordlessly turning and walking through the door. "Hey, Joplin," Todd called after him suddenly. Schuyler paused, glancing at him over his shoulder. "Like I said last time we ran into each other- despite what you may think, I'm not unreasonable, and that's why I'm saying…thank you," he choked out. "For what you did with Blair and Tea. I may think you're scum most of the time, but you _have_ saved the lives of the three most important women in the world to me, and I can give you credit for that."

Schuyler stared at Todd in silence for a long time, struggling to figure out the best response so as not to ruin the bit of goodwill Todd had unexpectedly showed him.

"You're welcome," he finally replied simply, with a quick, tight smile, before he turned and left the room.

Trying not to dwell on the conversation and overanalyze every moment, as he was tempted to, Schuyler sped off towards Blair's room, hating to be away from Starr for even a minute right now.

"Oh, Schuy- Mr. J!"

He stopped in his tracks and saw Langston calling out to him from an adjacent hallway, waving him over with one hand as she balanced several packages of cookies in the other.

"Hey, Blair got moved," she told him once he came over. "I'll show you to her new room."

"Wait, why was she moved?" Schuyler asked quickly. "Was there a change in her condition, is she okay?"

"Oh, yeah, Blair's still fine, still sleeping like a baby. It's just that Dorian called and asked me what room Blair was in a little while ago, and ordered me to give the phone to a nurse when I told her; I just heard a lot of screeching over the line, and next thing I know, Blair is getting moved to a room big enough to fit every victim of a car crash," she laughed as she led him to the right location. "Oh, hey, so I heard you and Todd were having a talk; I see no blood on you, no obvious bruises, so it clearly went better than expected, huh?"

"Much better, actually," Schuyler admitted, the surprise still clear in his voice. "The people in Starr's life have really been shocking me on that front," he remarked, his tone amazed. Langston shot him a smile.

"Well, you're a really good guy, Schuyler, that much is obvious to anyone who actually gives you a chance; you're exactly the kind of guy people _hope_ to see someone they care about end up with, and it becomes really obvious once they get to know you how perfect you are for Starr- it's really no wonder everyone ends up approving you."

"Thank you, Langston," he said softly, sounding touched.

"Just stating the truth," she replied warmly. "Oh, and, here we are! Starr's inside, you can go on in. Jack, I got the goods!" she called to the boy, currently sitting in one of the chairs right outside the room and playing with a book of mad-libs a nurse had given him. "But the golden oreos are mine, so don't even think about it."

"Everyone knows the chocolate ones are better anyway- hey, I need a noun."

"Oh, I'm so freaking good at mad libs, this is gonna be fun."

Schuyler said a quick hello to Jack (offering up an adjective when prompted) then quietly opened the door to Blair's room; Starr was sitting silently beside Blair's bed, keeping an eye on her, and Schuyler just watched her for a minute before knocking lightly on the doorframe.

"Hey; do you want to be alone, or-"

"No," Starr said quickly, turning and smiling at him. "Come in, please."

Schuyler did as she said, and Langston peered in through the doorway as he took the seat next to her.

"We'll watch the door for you guys, don't worry," she promised, shutting it behind her as she left.

"Thanks, Langston!" Starr called loudly, before fixing Schuyler with a warm gaze. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and she contentedly cuddled into his side. "So, how'd it go?"

"I actually just heard the words 'thank you' come out of your dad's mouth, and got a promise he won't 'stand in our way.'"

"Shut up!" Starr gasped in shock, reeling back to look at him. "Oh my God, you're serious? Wow. _Wow,_" she repeated, stunned.

"You think he means it?"

"Well…he seems sincere," she said, shrugging and hesitantly looking down as she fidgeted with her hands. "But I've always thought that, and he's always proved me wrong in the past, so I don't know. I hope he's changing, but this day has kind of made me think I shouldn't be so quick to trust that. I just…I don't want him to make me feel stupid for having faith in my own father, yet again," she said quietly, sighing.

"Starr, even if he screws up for the thousandth time, it doesn't make you stupid, it just makes you a good person- a better one than he deserves to have in his life."

Starr nodded and just mulled it over in silence for a few minutes; Schuyler didn't say anything, knowing she needed the time to brood, and just sat with her quietly. He was subconsciously brushing his fingers against the gauze on her arm in a soothing manner, gazing at her heavily, and it drew Starr out of her own head. She took one look at his hand on her arm, then his expression, and narrowed her eyes dangerously.

"You're thinking guilty thoughts again, I can tell," she accused. He chuckled darkly.

"No, that was a minute ago. Now I'm onto enraged, murderous thoughts."

"Alright, that's much better, that's allowed. Thoughts about your desire to murder okay, thoughts about your guilt over something that was not your fault bad, we clear?"

"Clear," he agreed softly. "But, uh…there's something else I was thinking of," he admitted hesitantly, knowing it would drive him crazy if he didn't ask her about it.

"What?"

"I, uh, overheard part of Marty giving her statement," he began, recalling how he'd been pacing around in the hall feeling sick after what he heard, until Cole come along to give him a distraction. "And she said…she said that after Powell stabbed your dad, he was about to do it again and you goaded him into getting upset to get him away from your father. Is that what happened?"

"Oh," Starr said slowly, furrowing her brow, before flashing a smile and trying to make a joke out of it. "Well, that's not the way _I_ recall it, but I think I'd been knocked around pretty good at that point and a concussion had set in, so who-"

"It's not funny!" Schuyler interrupted sharply, his voice heavy and intense. Starr instantly fell silent and looked up at him with startled eyes as he continued roughly. "I can't listen to you kid around about this, I can't handle that. God, Starr, do you even know what I would do if you…"

His voice caught and Schuyler pressed his fist to his lips, looking away. Starr gazed at him quietly, and she gently squeezed his arm; truth was, no, she didn't know what he'd do if he lost her, which was something that scared her. In that split second between Powell placing the knife to her throat and her hearing everyone's reactions, and Brody shooting him, that had been the only thought to come to mind around her fear; that she didn't know what Schuyler would do after losing her, so soon after his mother's suicide as well, when he had no support system like the rest of her loved ones, when even just the two of them breaking up had caused him to relapse, and the thought had terrified her even more than the knife at her throat.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly, resting her chin on his shoulder. "I know it's not funny- I think I would strangle you if you tried to joke about something like that. But for the record, no, that's honestly not what happened. I wasn't _trying_ to do anything, it's not like I had a plan or was intentionally trying to get his attention on me; seeing what he did to my dad just made me kind of lose it, triggered my idiot reflex where I can't seem to control anything I say. I promise you that I didn't _mean_ to put myself in so much danger- I know how I'd feel if you did something like that, which is why I would never do it to you."

"Okay," he said quietly, finally turning back to her. "I just needed to know. I'm sorry I kind of freaked out on you there," he added, taking her hand from his arm and lightly kissing her knuckles. "It's just the thought of anything happening to you…"

"I know," she assured him. Truth was, she really did. "Don't worry about it."

"I love you, Starr," he murmured, lightly resting his head against hers for a moment.

"I love you too."

Starr fell silent again; Schuyler saying he loved her, as he gazed at her in that way that let her know he thought the world of her, just involuntarily made her think of Powell, how had he felt so differently, that she was such a bad person.

"Starr," Schuyler said after studying her carefully for a minute, picking up on the lingering darkness in her eyes like nobody else would. "Is there something _you_ need to get off your mind?"

Starr glanced away hesitantly and took a deep breath, knowing if there was anyone she was going to feel comfortable talking to about something so personal, it was him.

"Can I ask you something, Schuy? I need you to pretend you don't love me, set that aside and be objective when you answer- can you do that?" she questioned nervously.

"I'll try."

"Okay, um…do you think I'm messed up, Schuyler?" Starr asked meekly. He looked startled, and looked at her sharply in disbelief.

"_What?_"

"I don't know, it's just some things Powell said getting to me."

"Oh, what? Starr, come on, Powell is psychotic, you know better than to listen to a single word he says!" he said firmly.

"He's psychotic, yeah, but it doesn't mean he can't stumble across a valid point. It's just…look, I've always thought the fact that I can forgive anyone anything is one of my best qualities, but maybe Powell has a point- maybe what he said is right and it's something that's _wrong_ with me. I mean, people in my life do these _terrible_ things, and they hurt me, and they hurt other people, and it's disgusting and _wrong_ and I should hate them for it, but I _don't_" she sighed, thinking of every single thing her father had done- it would probably take days to get through that list in full- thinking of Cole's assault in the bedroom at that party, thinking of Jessica's alter kidnapping her baby; she could go on and on. "I defend them and still love them, and maybe that's _not_ this virtuous, good thing that I always thought it was- maybe it's just because there's something sick and twisted about me too and I don't even realize it. Maybe that's why I just seem to draw people like that to me, because there is something so wrong with me too. I mean…doesn't loving a monster make you a monster too?" she asked weakly.

"No, Starr, it's exactly the opposite," Schuyler told her, his voice powerful and impassioned. "Being able to forgive and love people like that makes you the _best_ kind of person. It's really easy for most of us to say we believe in forgiveness and second chances, but it's a lot harder to follow through when push comes to shove. You are the rare kind of person who actually walks the walk- you don't forgive when it's easy and convenient for you, you forgive and hand out more chances when other people need it, regardless of how hard it is or how much it hurts you, and _don't_ let Powell twist you into thinking that's not something good, because it _is._"

"You really think so?" she asked hopefully. He instantly nodded.

"I mean yeah, I admit, sometimes I do wish you were a little more guarded, that you didn't forgive and give out second chances left and right because I do think it leads to you being taken advantage of or getting hurt sometimes, people use the fact that you'll forgive them to walk over you, but I also know you're tough enough and smart enough to handle yourself. Your ability to let people have another chance time and time again, long after most people give up, is probably your greatest quality, Starr- _I_ wouldn't be in your life if you didn't have that capacity to forgive and let go of people's past so they can have a better future. And sick and twisted are the absolute _last_ words I would ever use to describe you- _you_ are the first good and pure thing I have ever had in my life. People who are all dark and twisted aren't drawn to you because you're that way too- it's because you're the exact _opposite_, and they know it."

"Thank you, Schuyler," Starr said tenderly, cupping his cheek and gazing warmly into his eyes as the tension eased from her body; if there was one person whose opinion mattered to her, it was Schuyler, and knowing how strongly he disagreed, hearing him say these kinds of things about her, was all she really needed. "But for the record, it is so not true that you're one of those dark, twisted people, that you wouldn't be in my life if I weren't so forgiving of people like that- _you_ are one of the _good_ guys, and you're eventually going to have to accept that."

He started to say something, and Starr knew he was going to argue and try to disagree with her, so she cut him off by leaning up and crushing her lips to his in a heated kiss, rendering him speechless.

However, their kiss was abruptly cut short a second later by the sound of someone clearing their throat, and, to their shock, Blair's voice.

"So sorry to interrupt, but I just wanted to chime in and say I agree with your opinions of each other."

"Oh my God, mom!" Starr cried in relief, abruptly flinging herself off the chair, dashing to her bedside, and throwing her arms around her. "I'm not hurting you, right?"

"Not at all, sweetie, I'm fine," Blair laughed softly.

"Alright," Starr said, taking a deep breath as she gazed at her mother affectionately. "New rule, okay? Nobody gives you sleeping drugs until your daughter gets to talk to you and see you're okay for herself- I knew you wouldn't let some gas leaky basement keep you down, but it would have been nice to hear you tell me you were okay yourself."

"I'll keep that in mind for the next time this happens," Blair agreed sarcastically, smiling. Starr giggled, and Blair's attention drifted from her daughter to Schuyler, currently hovering nervously behind her. She smiled at him, and he returned it.

"Hi, Ms. Cramer; I'm glad you're okay."

"Schuyler, after what we went through tonight, I think you and I are on a first name basis."

"Sorry, Ms. Cra…Blair," he corrected himself sheepishly.

A moment later, Jack, who had heard his mom wake up, came rushing into the room, and things quickly got a little chaotic again, as Jessica, Brody and Hope all showed up to join in, Blair's kids fussed over her, and she tried to piece together from everyone what had happened, only to grow completely hysterical when she found out Starr and Todd had both nearly been killed. Finally, everyone seemed to chill back out after Langston was forced to once again nearly sit on someone to restrain them, not even once but _twice_, after Blair first tried to get out of bed to go find and kill Powell before she heard he was already dead, then tried to go find Todd as well- apparently nothing brought a woman back to her senses as quickly as a teenage girl practically pinning her to a bed.

"Well, Schuyler- you're certainly turning out to be a very good person to have around," Blair remarked once things had calmed down. Schuyler looked bashful, and Blair and Jessica exchanged a grin.

"Oh, he's modest too, Blair- your daughter did pretty well with this one."

"I found a boyfriend, I didn't buy a showdog- quit evaluating him," Starr ordered everyone with a laugh.

"In all honestly, Schuyler, I'm glad you've been around, but I have to say- you probably had _no_ idea what you were in for with her family when you got involved with Starr, huh?" Blair asked, grinning. Schuyler nodded, chuckling.

"Not really, but it's okay, it's been exciting- keeps my life interesting."

"I like that answer. You know…tonight was supposed to be the whole 'getting to know the boyfriend' family dinner thing, but we didn't get to do that. But…this seems as good a venue as any to have that discussion and check you out," Blair mused. "So I say, let's talk- if you're still up for it."

"Absolutely," Schuyler agreed, though not without a hint of nerves. Langston took pity on him and jumped in to ease the slight tension, leveling him with a melodramatic gaze.

"So, Schuyler- how many goats are you willing to offer us for Starr here?" she demanded, causing everyone else in the room to burst out laughing.

"Oh, God, he can have her free," Jack groused. "We should pay _him_ off, actually."

"This family sucks," Starr muttered. Schuyler laughed again as he squeezed her shoulders, turning to Langston to answer her question.

"An entire herd."

"Another good answer!" Jessica remarked with a giggle.

"Agreed," Blair remarked, grinning. "I think I'm gonna like him, Starr. What about you, Jack? You think he passes muster?"

"Oh, yeah, totally! That Kyle guy was being a huge jerk and Schuyler punched him in the face for it," Jack snickered. "It was awesome, he was bleeding everywhere- he's totally good enough."

"He saved my family's lives- that's all I needed to know I like him," Jessica chimed in.

"Violence- I can't believe I didn't think of that," Starr said to Schuyler with a cluck of her tongue, shaking her head.

"What?"

"I can't believe I didn't realize it would be violence that would win my crazy family over, we're just weird like that. I mean yeah, there's the happiness thing, sure, but you really had my mom and Jessica because of how you stopped Zach, my dad has a grudging amount of respect for you because you beat the crap out of him, and now Jack thinks you're cool because you broke Kyle's nose. I just should have known," she laughed, glancing around the calm, happy faces of her friends and family with a satisfied smile. "Well, whatever the reason, it looks like you're in."

* * *

"Alright, I'm in for two oreos."

An hour later, after Schuyler had been properly interrogated, Jack had started to seem a little antsy again, and Starr knew he (and everyone else in the room, for that matter) had to be dying to just have a little fun and finally relax after this night from hell, so she'd managed to get a deck of cards from the nurse's station and had gotten a poker game going- Langston had donated the numerous packages of cookies she'd bought to be used for betting, and Brody had run down to buy in and pitch in several more, so they had quite the pot building.

Langston, Brody and Blair were all out at this point, leaving only the other four, and things had gotten quite competitive, particularly between Starr and Schuyler, the self declared poker aficionados, and the usually loving duo were trash talking each other left and right, much to the amusement of everyone else in the room. The room was now filled with laughter, cheers and heckling, everyone in a much better place.

"Okay, Starr, I see your two oreos, and I raise you three chips ahoy, and two wafers," Schuyler stated confidently. There was a simultaneous gasp from the rest of the room, as chips ahoy had the hightest 'chip value', and Starr gaped at them.

"Oh, please! He's bluffing- and not even particularly well, I might add," she added, rolling her eyes dismissively.

"Well, he has me convinced," Jessica laughed, tossing her cards down. "I fold,  
luck doesn't seem to be on my side this time."

She stood from her chair and walked back to Hope and Brody, the latter of whom was now betting with Langston and Blair over the outcome of the game. She grabbed a few m&m cookies, adding them to the current pot on Blair's bedside table.

"I'm betting on Schuyler to win the whole thing."

"Thank you, Jessica!"

"Hey!" Starr squealed indignantly. Jess shrugged, smiling sheepishly.

"Sorry hun, he seems like he knows what he's doing."

"Too rich for my blood," Jack sighed, also folding.

Schuyler turned to the last person left, Starr, and cocked an eyebrow, the challenge clear. Starr smirked, calmly tossing in the cookies, then a few extra.

"Somebody's feeling cocky," he sing-songed.

"Somebody can tell when you're faking it," she sang back as Jack wandered behind Schuyler, looking over his hand.

"What d'ya think, buddy?" Schuyler asked him.

"I say you raise her one more," he stated confidently. Schuyler did so, and Starr snorted, tossing in a cookie without hesitating.

"Please, as if I'm falling for that. And I call, which means I show first- get ready to weep, and know that there's no shame in a man crying."

Starr rather smugly showed her full house, and Schuyler flinched dramatically.

"Ouch, you're right; I actually think I might cry now…"

"Which is okay."

"Out of sympathy pains for how embarrassing this is for you," he continued, finishing with a smirk and flipping his cards over to reveal a four of a kind. "It's really impressive how you can tell when I'm faking it- should I go weep like you said now?"

Jack instantly burst out laughing as Starr's jaw dropped, and the room exploded as Schuyler whooped it up, Starr cried in outrage, and everyone else cracked up, placing more bets on the final round to come.

"Okay, you can quit celebrating now jerk, game's not over yet!" Starr shouted after giving him a minute to enjoy the victory, as she was determined to make sure it never happened again. "We're just tied now, and you have to beat me one on one, which is so not happening."

In a loud stage whisper, Schuyler tried to offer Starr a way to escape this upcoming humiliation, but she just punched him in the arm, clearly holding back a bright laugh, and ordered him to take his seat. He did so, and Starr made a show out of shuffling the cards this time, fanning them out dramatically.

"Fancy shuffling does not make you a good poker player."

"No, the fact that I'm gonna kick your ass makes me a good poker player," she grumbled.

"Have I ever warned you that Starr gets _really_ competitive?" Langston asked him, snickering. "I once seriously thought she was going to punch Markko over a game of charades."

"Starship Troopers, how hard is that to get?! Who guesses songs and people when it's been stated a thousand times that the category is movies?!"

"Starr, I love you, but it was two years ago, let it go."

Langston couldn't control her laughter when Starr ignored her, and took a brief pause from the game to reenact her clues from that night for Schuyler, demanding to know if he would have guessed it based on that.

"Is my sister losing it?" Jack asked flatly. Langston giggled.

"She just needs to have fun right now," she told him, knowing Starr was throwing herself into the game in such an over the top way like this to compensate for how freaked out she still was by this night- she knew her too well, she could see how the gleam in her eyes had dimmed tonight, she'd picked up on how Starr kept grabbing her neck the way she had earlier when she'd told Langston she didn't want to talk about, which had her friend really concerned about the specifics of what she'd gone through with Powell. Langston could also tell Schuyler recognized this as well and was playing along for Starr's sake, which made her appreciate him even worse.

Langston was just giggling as she watched Starr act out a new movie for Schuyler (Langston realized within seconds that it was I Still Know What You Did Last Summer- did she know her best friend or what?), when she got that strange feeling of being watched. She glanced over her shoulder, expecting to find the drama of this night had just made her paranoid, but to her surprise, Cole was hovering near the doorway, curiously watching the going-ons in the room with a heavy, wistful expression. Langston felt a pang in her chest and quickly walked over to the door as Starr kept gesturing wildly.

"Oh, I Still Know What You Did Last Summer!"

"_Yes!_"

"How on earth did he guess that?" Blair asked in amazement.

"I thought she was doing The Green Mile," Brody muttered to Jessica.

"See, _this_ I why I love you, Schuy- though that love isn't going to keep me from totally destroying. Timeout over!" she announced, grabbing the cards again.

Langston blocked them all out and flashed Cole a bright smile as she walked over to him, as Cole looked at her nervously, already starting to step back.

"Hey, uh, sorry, I was just leaving since my mom told me there was no point in waiting for her, she's staying with John overnight, and I heard all the commotion, and I just-"

"You're just in time!" she interrupted him perkily, as though she hadn't even heard him. Without giving him a chance to protest, she grabbed his hand and pulled him inside with her, guiding him back to where they were all betting and handing him several cookies.

"Here you go."

"Uh, what's going on?" he asked slowly, glancing at the cookies piled on the table in confusion.

"Oh, it's the last round of poker, Starr versus Schuyler, and Brody, Blair, Jess, Jack and I are betting cookies over the game. Who's gonna win, by how much-"

"Whether or not Starr throws a hissy fit and knocks over the table when she loses," Jack interjected with a grin.

"Hey!" Starr crowed at him, then her mother, who had burst out laughing. "Family obviously means nothing to you people," she huffed.

"I'll put three chocolate chip down on Starr," Cole said, relaxing as he smiled slightly at Langston, his gratitude for including him clear; she simply returned the smile and gave his hand a quick squeeze.

"_Thank you_, Cole! Brody and Cole are obviously the only cool people in this room," Starr declared, throwing a quick appreciative glance to the duo for betting on her, before throwing a glare her best friend's way. "Yeah, don't think I didn't hear you bet against me earlier, Langston- _traitor_."

"He spent four years playing this game every week!" she squeaked. "I have to protect my dessert."

"Yeah yeah- how many do you want?"

"Three," Schuyler said, discarding. Starr passed them over, then took two herself. They studied each other carefully, but Starr and Schuyler were both longtime masters at hiding their emotions, and thus, both had a perfect poker face.

"I'll let you bet first this time," she offered. Schuyler glanced at his cards one more time, then pushed half of his pile in. Starr seemed unfazed and did the same, raising him two. Schuyler raised an eyebrow, looking at her dubiously.

"You sure you wanna do this? Langston's right, I _did_ go to college in Vegas, practically lived in the casinos" he reminded her. She grinned playfully.

"Ooh, scary. You must be feeling worried if you're trying to talk me out of this round, Vegas boy."

"Hey, I'm just trying to be nice and save you from embarrassing yourself again, but all bets are off now," he told her with a smirk, adding everything he had left to the pot. "I'm all in." Starr didn't even hesitate to follow suit, which seemed to surprise him slightly.

"Hey, you might have gone to college in the card capital, but in the Manning household, you learn to play poker before you can even read. You ready to reveal?"

"Ready if you are."

Starr gestured for him to go ahead, and Schuyler made a dramatic show of revealing _another_ four of a kind, which caused him to grin at her smugly. Starr made gasped in disbelief, looking crushed, and Langston pressed her hands to her mouth to smother a laugh, realizing Starr was totally faking it.

"Who says lightning doesn't strike twice?"

"Wow," Starr murmured, her voice exaggeratedly downcast. "I can't even believe this- you are _so_ lucky, Schuy…or you would be, if I didn't have a _straight flush!_" she shouted gleefully, throwing her cards over and promptly leaping to her feet to do a victory dance.

Brody and Cole both cheered with joy over winning their own bet, instantly grabbing their cookies, while Jack and Jessica cried out in disappointment, and Langston just shook her head, laughing softly to herself; Starr had hit the nail on the head earlier, there was no doubt that her family was crazy…and Langston absolutely loved it.

"Haha, I just completely owned you, Mr. I-Went-To-College-In-Vegas! Starr rules, Schuyler sucks!"

"Nice to see you having such a healthy relationship, Starr," Langston joked.

"Hush, traitor. And give me my cookies!"

"Okay, nobody likes a sore winner, Starr," Blair cut in, though Starr could see her mother's eyes dancing with amusement as well.

"That's not true at all- he does," she laughed, nodding to Schuyler.

"Don't put words in my mouth."

"Oh, no you did not."

"Two points Schuyler," Jack snickered, high fiving him.

"Well, fine, be that way, now I just have to say it again- Schuyler sucks."

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding," he chuckled, opening his arms to her. Starr sat down on his lap, smiling warmly and leaning back against him as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "The loser still loves the winner. But you owe me a rematch."

"Nope, no rematches- I retired as champion."

"You cannot retire as champion."

"Oh, really? Weird, 'cause I just did."

"That is not-"

"Wow; you know, I used to think you two were perfect for each other because you were both such old souls, but now I see it's because you're both _twelve_ at heart," Langston told them, shaking her head.

"Perfect for each other is still perfect for each other either way," Starr replied.

"Fair enough."

Jessica also tried to convince Starr to a rematch, swearing to bet on her this time, but Starr held steady and the topic was changed when it became obvious she wasn't going to budge. They all just sat around and talked together for a while, getting to experience a nice bit of peace after so much chaos, but to Starr's disappointment, Brody soon excused himself and Hope to his overnight room so they could get to sleep, Cole left shortly after him, and she could tell Jessica was going to join Brody and her mom would be turning in for the night soon as well; that meant she was going to have to finally go home soon, which Starr was dreading. She was reaching that point where she felt so physically exhausted that her entire body just got that heavy, aching feeling, but the last thing she wanted was to go to sleep- she could just imagine the kind of nightmares this night would cause. And going home meant separating from Schuyler, which was the absolute _last_ thing she wanted to do.

"Well, kids, I hate to say this," Blair began a few minutes later, yawning as her eyelids started to droop. "I'm not exactly eager to let you out of my sight, but you should probably head home. I don't think I can stay awake much longer, and it's really late, you need some sleep."

"She's right, you guys should go," Starr said to Jack and Langston. "But I'm gonna stay here tonight, okay?"

"Oh no you're not," Blair interjected firmly.

"What? But, mom, I can't just leave you and dad here, I-"

"Starr, your father and I are both fine, and we are in a _hospital_; even if something were to happen, which it won't, we're already in the best place we can be. And I understand why this isn't always so easy to remember, but your dad and I _are_ the parents here, and you're the child- that means it's not _your_ job to look after _us._ We're the ones that take care of you, and I'm telling you to go home and get some rest; I'm sure the hospital will release me first thing in the morning anyway, you won't even have time to miss me."

"And I'm staying here with Brody and Hope, Starr- I can check in on your parents as often as you want," Jessica said.

"I appreciate that, Jess, but Mom, I don't want-"

"This is not a debate, Starr- you are going home." Starr sighed in frustration, and Blair glanced to her daughter's boyfriend. "Schuyler…" Blair began hesitantly.

She took in her daughter's injured arm, her tense, nervous eyes, the way she was tightly holding Schuyler's hand. Blair had noticed throughout the night that even during all the teasing and heckling during the poker game, Starr never strayed more than a few feet away from Schuyler, and she never let him out of her sight, remaining fiercely aware of him at all times. She obviously needed him now, after the hellish night she'd had, and Blair wanted to do whatever she could to help her daughter.

"Schuyler, will you take her home?" Blair asked softly. "You're welcome to stay at La Boule tonight. In fact, I think I would appreciate it if you would."

There was a moment of surprised silence as everyone processed what Blair was truly saying with that request- that Starr and Schuyler, beyond a shadow of doubt, had Blair's full hearted approval.

"Thank you, Blair," Schuyler said quietly, appearing slightly stunned. "And of course I will."

"Any complaints now?" Blair asked her daughter, who just smiled and shook her head, suddenly no longer dreading her own home anymore. "Alright, then you guys get going; I'll see all of you tomorrow."

Langston and Schuyler stepped back so Starr and Jack could exchange their I  
love yous with Blair and say goodnight privately, and then they all said goodnight to Jessica as well and reluctantly left the room. Jack and Langston both had to make a bathroom stop, so Starr and Schuyler waited near Blair's room for them; their voices could still be heard, and Blair couldn't help listening in.

"So, what are we calling this night?" Starr asked, holding up their interlocked hands and absent-mindedly playing with his fingers as she spoke; Blair was once again struck by how very natural and comfortable they seemed. "On the one hand, we almost died, but on the other hand, my family definitely approves of you now, you even got a thank you out of my father and a _request_ to spend the night from my mother. Sooo…?"

"You know what? This might surprise you, but I think I'm gonna call it a win. Good seems to outweigh the bad."

"Oh, yay. But, um, Schuyler," she said hesitantly. "I know what you always say, but I…I was thinking about all the craziness you constantly have to deal with by being part of my life, and I just want to make sure you know that if there ever comes a day when the good _doesn't_ outweigh everything else anymore, when the bad is too much, you're not trapped with me or anything, you can always get out, okay?"

"Starr, I just want to make sure you understand that's never going to happen, _okay?_" he told her firmly with a warm smile. Starr grinned.

"Okay," she replied softly.

"You know, maybe I'm just crazy, but…I have a surprisingly good feeling about this," Blair noted to Jessica, unable to help smiling in response to how happy Starr looked. Jessica did the same.

"Maybe I'm crazy too, but, so do I." They watched the duo for another moment, then Jessica glanced back to Blair with an amused expression. "Of course, knowing us, there's a decent possibility that we really _are_ just crazy." Blair laughed, her eyes lingering on the couple as Jack and Langston rejoined them and they all disappeared down the hall.

"Well, I guess we'll have to just wait and see."

**End Chapter**

Hope you all enjoyed this little section of Scarr's journey :) I'm really looking forward to writing the next few chapters- to give you a hint of the next main storyline focus, Schuyler is going to be the one feeling insecure for once (and not over Cole), which I think is a fun reversal, and Starr gets to have another confrontation with crazy stripper bitch :P


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